Remember The Days You Cried Alone? Remember All The Pain You Went Through? Remember All The Sorrow And

If you don't believe in the bible because it's man made, you shouldn't believe Ceaser was real because so was the history books showing his existance.

If you don't believe in God because you can't touch, see, smell, taste, or feel him, then you shouldn't believe in Gravity because you can't touch, see, smell, taste, or feel that either.

If you don't believe in Jesus because you think having faith in a God you haven't "met" is blind idiocy, then you shouldn't believe the astroid belt exists because that'd be having faith in something you've only seen in diagrams, pictures, and books, all of which were given to you by man.

As my teacher had once taught me, hard evidence is great, but soft evidence is just as valid.

There are testimonies, miracles, healed and saved people roaming the world. All of them have a reason for following God, and if you find a true christian, you'll be in awe everytime you hear their discoveries. They don't believe because they saw it in a book or because mama told them so, but because they've met Christ in a way He wanted to reveal Himself to them. One day, if you honestly ask Him to show Himself to you and you listen, you could have a testimony of your own.

SEGA WHEN I CATCH YOU SEGA SEGA WHEN I CATCH YOU

So mad so mad so mad so mad so mad at SEGA why why WHY must they do this to me. Imagine falling in love and then KILLING that same love. Hahahahahaha imagine being a kid when it happened. HAHAHAHAHA IMAGINE HAVING ALL OF YOUR FRIENDS JUST WATCH YOU SOB AS YOU HOLD THE TRIGGER TO SHOOT YOUR LOVE. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH IMAGINE ALL THATS LEFT OF HER AFTER YOU EXPLODE HER WITH AN ENERGY CANNON IS A SINGULAR SEED. IMAGINE NOBODY EXCEPT ONE PERSON REALLY COMES TO SHOULDER YOUR PAIN AND TEARS. IMAGINE NOBODY THOUGHT THAT MAYBE A CHILD SHOULDN'T HAVE TO SHOOT HIS NONOFFICIAL GIRLFRIEND. IMAGINE-

Anyway, all greiving aside, I miss her.

I joined the Sonic fandom in a kinda odd way ngl. At the time, I was stupid and a fresh middle schooler and it was extremely popular to make fun of the sonic franchise cuz it was a whole meme and stuff. I also made fun of it cuz I thought I was supposed to. But I realized it was stupid to make fun of something I haven't even seen before. So I wanted to educate myself on it. Coincidently, I saw a video. It was by CourtneySNT about her first ever sonic fancomic around that time. I really enjoyed it actually. Sometimes I go back and rewatch it. Anyway, in her comic, she had introduced Tails to the screen and I fell in love with the fandom. Grant it, her depiction of tails at that moment was the polar opposite of what he's actually like, but still. It compelled me to watch Sonic X, The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, Sonic Boom, Sonic Prime, A bit of Sonic Underground, and just...Sonic the Hedgehog. I also watched a few gameplays and a lot of cutscene movies of the videogames as well as parodies and fan content. So...yeah.

Now it's just a Sonic Prime Nine analysis/rant below lol

Also, since I mentioned SONIC PRIME, I might as well rant about it. NINE. WAS. SO. PERFECT. He was well written, well scripted, and well developed. Everything about nim was chef's kiss. His story was literally just a what if. What if Sonic never met Tails? Well, number one, he wouldn't be named Tails. He'd make his own name. Nine. Also, he became cold and distant because he expected others to treat him the same due to his two tails. Perfect character already but then they fleshed him out some more and introduced this...guy named Sonic.

He didn't know Sonic at the time nor did he really know...anybody. So when this blue loser comes waltzing into his house unannounced, he obviously gets hostile. Why? Well, one, because a rando broke into his casa. But also because everyone he met was hostile to him first. Crazy. Then this guy seems to be friendly. A first. So, Nine lets down his ice cold walls and trusts him. Let me emphasize that. NINE TRUSTED SONIC. Remember that. It is SO important.

So, Nine goes along and helps this guy for no real reason other than the fact that he considers him a friend. Now, you'd think he also helped to stop the egg council, but he really never had bad blood with them in the first place. He isn't in the resistance nor shows any resentment. He's Nine all on his own, with or without the council. In fact, he probably doesn't care if they rule because he wanted to be alone anyway. But he helped. Why? Because he wanted to help his FRIEND.

This goal warps when Nine discovers an empty realm called the grim. He can have a fresh start there with him and sonic. Just the people he cared about. He asked Sonic to go with him because he wanted to share his dream with him. He wanted Sonic to be a part of it with him. But Sonic undermined his dreams. It'd be one thing if he simply disagreed with it or gave a good, justifying, and well explained reason for refusing, but instead he didn't explain himself well. Sonic entitled himself to the prisms, assuming him getting home was everyone's priority. I don't mean to villainize him because this was simply reckless and unknowing behaviour, but still. Nine got upset that his FRIEND was trampling on his dreams as if they didn't matter nearly as much as Sonic's.

So, he "betrayed" Sonic. I want to bring this to everyone's attention. Nine had critisized Sonic because he recklessly didn't think about what woukd happen to everyone else if he DID bring back his home. Like, nobody knows jack squat about the prisms. Sonic, Nine, Shadow, even the egg council was lost when it came to those big shiny rock things. It shines and made our universes. That's all they knew. So, with that in mind, it makes sense to be concerned. Like what if it kills us? What if it destroys our world in order to bring back yours? They only exist because of the prism being destroyed, so if you fix it, would that kill them? Idk, I feel like this was mentioned once and never brought up again and it makes me mad. Such potential.

Anyway, after the situation, Nine goes back to the grim to make his dreams come true by himself. Because the one person he TRUSTED broke his trust. So, after a bunch of irrelavent stuff happens, Sonic goes to the grim after making a deal to Nine. Nine lets him into the grim and Sonic starts to preach to Nine about their friendship. Nine listens and almost starts to trust him again, maybe thinking about his actions and how they might not have been the best. How their friendship could maybe be salvaged. Why? Because Sonic said he woukd sacrifice himself to save Nine too. But then an entire army shows up to beat Nine into a teeny tiny pulp. Grant it, Sonic did not call them to the grim. But then he imediently sides with them in taking Nine down in an all out war. After saying he'd sacrifice for Nine too, he pulls an uno reverse on him. Trust broken. Again.

So now, he wants to trust nobody. Why? Because Sonic broke once too many. So he starts fighting. And fighting. And fighting. Like he's been doing his entire life. Who is he fighting? Someone who he thought was his friend. Someone who claims to be his friend. Someone who he thought he wouldn't need to fight. And he's clearly breaking his own body in desperation while doing so. Nobody really said anything about it either btw. Like, he's literally hurting himself and Sonic, his "friend" didn't even try to stop him because he was hurting himself, but because he was huring others and taking the prisms. I understand of course because he's hurting your friends, but his own pain wasn't even a slither of his drive.

Anyway, the ending sucked personally. It was anticlimactic. Nine gives in just because and then Sonci goes home, mystery never discovered, and yay we're done.

Jesus is God. That' confusing because how can he be God, the Holy Spirit, and Jesus at the same time? How can he be his own father? Well let me give you an analogy.

Think of a video game. For me, I've recently started talking about Jesus to people on Roblox. I myself am me, being my physical body. My roblox avatar is also me. And so is the voice people hear in voice chat. All of them are me, but they are not the same. Jesus is the same. He is like the avatar, God the physical body, and the Holy Spirit the voice.

Dazai Chronicles

Hey, so, do you guys like the Dazai Chronicles? I might make more, but honestly I'm not sure what other characters to do. I already have Chuuya's in the progress, but everyone else is kinda...blank. So, I have a few ideas on people to put in the series, but I'm not sure who you'd like to come first and stuff. So, I'm holding a poll.

(Omg I'm so stupid I accidently picked Fyoder and can't unpick it)

Guys, if you pick other, you're gonna have to tell me who, or else I won't know who you mean lol

I just read Judges 19 through 20 and I am...shocked and apalled.

Here's a summary:

A Levite's concubine cheats on him and dips for her dad's house for 4 months. Missing his wife, he went to get her and win her back. He got her, left, and stopped at Gideah for a break and to sleep for the night. An old man took them in but then a gang of gay rapists came in hopes of raping the Levite man. The old man refuses and offers his virgin daughter as well as the Levite's wife instead. The gang doesn't listen and the Levite gives up the wife anyway in his place. The gang rapes and beats her from night to daybreak before finally letting her go. She goes back to the old man's house in attempt to return to her master/husband but dies on the doorstep. The man sees this in the morning, takes her home, cuts her limb by limb into 12 pieces, and scatters her around Israel. The Israelites were appalled and angered and so they went to war with the Benjaminites, killing tens of thousands of Israelites, cutting off an entire tribe, and cursing the survivors to never marry any Israelite again. The Israelites then made peace with the survivors, practically kidnapped hundreds of women from a different tribe, offered them up as wives to them without their or their parent's consent to offset the curse that no man shall give a wife to the Benjaminites, and went on with the world.

This sounds bad. Every sentence sounds horrible. I had to double take everytime I read a single sentence. But I did get something out of this:

One sin, even if directed at one person, a seemingly nobody, can snowball into a catastrophe of unfortunate events. Sin has a price, a very big one. And sometimes, it's not only the evil doer who pays for it. God will make everything turn out for the greater, but that doesn't mean we'll like the process. At all. I'd suggest we cut off sin from our lives...

God allows trials and tribulations. He allows bad deeds and horrible sin. He didn't stop that girl from being assulted, or that child from being kidnapped, or that bullet from entering someone's skull. He let it happen. But you have to remember he has a reason. He always has a reason. Even if we don't know it ourselves. Job was tried, and while many say it was to test and prove his faith, could there have been more to it? Something bigger and greater? Job taught us how to react in the face of uncertainty, doubt, and suffering. Through his pain, we have had years of our own suffering lifted from us. Just like Job, our suffering may not look like it has a reason and honestly, sometimes the reason isn't to teach a lesson at all, sometimes, it's something else, but it always has a reason. Our suffering may not be written in a historical holy book, and thank God for that cuz that would probably have to be like holocaust level to get into a historical document, but we can still use it to teach our friends, our family, and people we haven't even met yet. Job taught his wife to stay strong, his friends to be humble, and all of us, generations of people, that God has the answers and we don't ever need to doubt that. So stay strong guys. And know it has a purpose.

Love

God died for your love, not your validation. God loved the world so much so that He died for it. He died to free us of our sin, the choices we thought we wanted to make, but in reality were only hurting us. That is love. And love is not validation.

Love isn't blindlessly validating, it's picky, and particular, and restricting. Because it doesn't want you to settle with whatever you think you want, but for you to have what you need. So love isn't letting you pick out a moldy apple, when there's a fresh feast just in the oven. It's telling you there is better food in the oven and you don't need to eat something so revolting and unhealthy. If you still prefer the moldy apple, I can't force it out your hands and force the food down your throat. I can only watch as you settle for what you think you want because while love is restricting, it's not imposing. But I didn't validate your choices, I detest them. I know it's worthless to you, maybe even harmful, compared to the gifts you could be enjoying instead. I didn't see you doing something stupid and do it too to show that you're valid in your choices. I saw you do something stupid, told you it was dumb and showed you an example of better choices.

I make this mistake too. All the time. I see someone settle for so much less and I just look away. I don't tell them about the feast in the oven. I don't tell them the moldy apple is toxic. I don't tell them sin will hurt you in the end and I don't tell them about God. I just sit there. Watching. Validating. Supporting. But not loving. Because that is never loving.

I need to love better. I need to love how He loved me. And I pray that He would help me and give me the strength and courage to love. And I pray that other's would pray this for themselves also to learn how to truly love.

God telling you to surrender isn't selfish or prideful, it's selfless and merciful. If you were in a burning 8 story building, the only way out was the window, and a fireman came to save you, would you struggle as they help you get out? Would you squirm around and kick and flail? Personally, I'd surrender myself to them because I know they want me to live and I know they know how to save me. You can't get out on your own and they know that. They went in to save you, not so they could bring out some popcorn and watch you "save" yourself. So let God help you.

That Fangirl Moment Be Like

Does anyone ever get that feeling when you are fangirling so hard you feel like you might actually cough up your heart or whatever organ is starting to burn from all the squeeling you're doing? Or maybe how you squint your eyes so hard in excitment it feels like they might intertwine and shoot your eyeballs to the back of your skull? Or maybe how you wave your hands so visioucly that they might snap?

This lowkey be me whenever I come across my fav characters, my favorite songs, and most importantly, my favorote God.

I need more Jesus stans so we can fangirl together

Ok wait am I stupid?

Ok so I just had a dumb question pop into my mind out of nowhere. I randomly just figured this out and I NEED someone to explain to me.

So, Dazai met chuuya when they were 15, which is why it's called the 15 manga and ark. So, if they were 15 back then and they're 22 now, doing subtraction, it's been 7 years since they met, right? Ok that adds up, because they always mention how their partnership has gone on for said many years. HOWEVER, Dazai left the port mafia 4 years ago and was in hiding the whole time. Subtract 4 from 7 and, correct me if I'm being dumb, but that leaves 3. They've been partners for 3 years. Not 7. Not 6. But 3. Have I been lied to or am I overthinking this? I NEED ANSWERS PLEASE