Text → Nate & Zahra

texts | palmer bros.

nate: j

nate: jasonnnnnnnnn

nate: how ya feelin, champ?

bxstvrd​:

DATE & TIME: Monday morning, week of auditions LOCATION: J²’s room AVAILABILITY: Taken @aldysfool​

Jonah was already thirty minutes late to his first class of the day, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. He’d woken up with a weight on his chest that wouldn’t move, a panic in his heart that left him debilitated, immobile. Mustering the strength to get out of bed seemed impossible, and he’d lay there, silent, pretending to be asleep, as Julian had got ready and left for the day, had tried not to notice the way his roommate had been hovering, as if questioning whether to wake Jonah up so he wouldn’t be late.

He made the right choice and left. Which meant Jonah was alone.

Numbly, through the fog of his mind, he recognized that he should call Harry. If he called Helen, he’d have to explain why he was like this, and he just… he couldn’t do it. But even reaching over to grab his phone seemed impossible, so he just lay there, festering like a wound, curled in on himself, trying to minimize the damage. When he was left alone, like this, painfully aware of his own existence, all he could think of was Orson, which turned into William, which turned into Des – all of the father figures who failed him, or maybe he failed them, and maybe every single one of them was right: there was nothing wrong with the world. There was something wrong with him.

And just like that, tears were welling in his eyes, staining his pillow. He curled in tighter, wrapping his arms around his knees, muffling the quiet hitches of his breath, not hearing the sound of the door of his dorm opening over the weight of his own agony.

contrary to what most people would assume, nate loved mornings. so much so, that he often just stayed awake to watch the sun rise; it’s a beautiful sight that always manages to bring him some comfort. had he always been this prone to insomnia? nah. was it something that had developed over the past couple of months? nope. would he admit it was getting worse every day? of course not. this morning was just like every other morning he’d had the previous week, except he was basically running off of caffeine fumes and a sugar rush, because mondays fucking sucked, but nate was not going to let the gloom of another week take the reigns of his morning. he couldn’t afford it.

so nate decides to spread the love with breakfast food, because hey, it’s his favorite meal of the day and not one student in the history of alderidge can deny the impressive spread the refectory boasts each morning. balancing two containers of waffles, a sack of fruit, and a drink carrier, nate tumbles through the dorm: “good day, my fellow thespians! let us gather and be merry and...talk shit, or whatever!” it doesn’t take him long to realize that no one’s listening, and for a moment, he’s a little bummed that j&j are nowhere to be found. nate checks for julian — nope. so he turns his attention to jonah. nate almost reconsiders checking on him, but he calls out anyway, “jonah, you up? i’ve brought sustenance." nate doesn’t hear a response, so he shrugs and sits the bags down before he drops all of it. nate knows he’s there, but tries to rationalize that maybe he doesn’t want to be bothered. ...but then it starts to bug him, so nate tries again. he needs to hear some kind of response, or else his mind will start to jump to wildly ridiculous conclusions.

“...i didn’t bring any burnt toast this time, so that’s a plus. right?”

teddynewell​:

when nate calls, teddy answers. he didn’t hesitate to meet him at the anchor. hanging out with nate always meant a fun time, it meant forgetting about the weight of the world on his shoulders. teddy’s eyes widen at the sight of the fireball shots. it’s a weekday. not that it had ever mattered before, but it still throws him off for a second. he turns to look at nate and his smile widens. “i’m so so proud of you, you have no idea,” he tells him. teddy really likes hanging out with nate. there’s something about him, something teddy can’t pinpoint yet. “oh, wow. i feel so special.” he wraps his arm around nate’s shoulders, raising his own glass. “let’s toast to us, and to you, to getting you absolutely wasted tonight.”

"here here!” nate laughs and downs his first shot with ease. at this point, the smooth, fiery shots were like a rite of passage for him before the actual drinks for the night. and no, he didn’t care what day it was. nate had seriously considered waiting until a larger group of the fourth years could occupy a couple of booths in the back and wreck havoc, but the reason to celebrate was urgent. luckily, he could always depend on teddy to meet up with him for some potentially dumb decisions to be made. the night was still young, after all. “i’m proud of us, teddy bear. we did it! between you as malcolm and me as first witch, we’re gonna steal the hell out of this show. sidebar, why have i never called you that before?” when the second round comes, nate picks them up and motions towards the pool table in the back corner. “either way, that’s some cast list, right? chandler is going to kill lady ‘beth, for sure.”

harryzhangs​:

location: campus, morning after cast list reveal closed to @aldysfool​

“nate?” harry calls out, squinting toward the figure walking toward the FAB just ahead of her. she power-walks a bit to catch up to him, figuring if they both have to be up this early to go to class, they might as well go together. “by the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes. wait, shit, is it even the first witch who says that?”

nate is strolling along towards the FAB, trying to decide if he wants to ditch class this morning when he hears his name being called. he grins at harry, but his mind blanks on the line, “oh fuck, i don’t actually know! damn, you found me out. i’m a bad actor.” nate slows his pace, ”but hey, good gentlewoman slash donalbain slash siward, congrats to you! how do you feel?” 

chandlerrosen​:

“oh,” chandler uttered, taken aback by his request. it was so much…simpler than she had imagined. she burst into laughter as she heard his cackle, impressed with his commitment to his characterization, even if it was an unorthodox one. “good, very good,” she laughed, nodding her head as she slid into the seat across from him after deciding it was safe enough to do so. “ah, the old de niro method,” she chuckled, unsure how serious nate was about losing his mind - ideally, not very, but with nate, you never really knew.  

chandler took a sip of her coffee as she readied herself to answer nate’s question, “mhm, yeah, i’m really excited, actually. i’ve never played a woman on stage before, and i mean, it can’t be that different, but…” she trailed off, thinking of what josie said earlier. maybe chandler wasn’t cut out for the role of lady macbeth – macduff or king duncan would have been a far easier choice, and likely the role orson would have given her. “i guess i am kind of nervous,” she mumbled as she ran a hand through her hair, letting out a sigh, “but lady macbeth is a complex character, so it’ll at least be fun. hopefully no descent into madness, though.” 

.

nate smiles back at chandler, and for a moment, it’s easy to ignore the weird feeling he gets while talking to her. “i hate to break it to you, but playing the lady of the hour almost guarantees some sort of descent into madness will be happening. i hope you’re strapped in for a wild ride of rehearsals,” he laughs. nate realizes that this very brief conversation might be the longest they’ve had in a while; especially since everything went to shit last semester. would it be weird to ask her how she was doing? if she was having nightmares? if she was a little freaked out the events from the winter masque just like he was? a little heavy for small talk around the lunch table, maybe. but while he thinks of more small talk, he studies chandler for a second and can’t help but see orson. it was hard not to, as much as nate wanted to admit otherwise. 

“you’re totally gonna kill it, chandler. i hope you don’t let some of our idiotic classmates get to you. personally, i love that shit’s changed around here. feels lighter.” nate has a second thought on that comment, so he quickly adds before picking up his tea: “in like, the social dynamics of our class, i mean.”

ofmadsle​:

— ✶ 

Mads couldn’t help her laughter even if she tried, and he’s right. It paints a pretty picture. She could see Julian going in with it, and the small chaos the three of them could make together. “Imagine how cursed the play actually would be with us. Should we create a conspiracy theory?” She grins, though she was sure there was plenty of that going on. She was just as excited as him. But, she knew she should at least be honest. A witch wouldn’t be a bad role, she enjoyed them as well. Alas, the heart knew what it want, so she may have to break Nate’s just a bit.

“You know, while I can save the ass kicking for a different time, I was actually thinking of Lady Macbeth. Can you picture it? Sexy murder queen in all her 5′3 glory?” She laughs, because of course she has to make light of it to ease her anxiety surrounding such a decision. “Though, I think we should be the witches anyways. Halloween’s passed but it would be fun. Do you think I could grow a beard in time? I bet mine would be magnificent.” 

“ugh, well you know how i feel about lady ‘beth. and as one of your closest BFFs, while i’m selfishly thinking about all the trouble we’d be blamed for...i’m also super happy for you and will be your biggest cheerleader in going after, arguably, one of willy’s most complex female characters. which isn’t saying much, but y’know.” nate couldn’t help but grin at her, proud of mads going for the gold. what did she have to lose? what did any of them have to lose anymore? “mads le as lady macbeth. sounds about right. i mean, i can totally believe you’d conspire to kill a man.” that joke kinda hits different, since a man has actually died, but nate decides not to dwell on it. but he looks up, and they’re just outside the refectory, near where they were a few nights ago. he glances in mads’ direction.

“but you know what? let’s fuckin’ do it. i’m always down to dress up like a witch on any given day for absolutely no reason at all.” nate smiles, and makes a mental note to go snooping through the costume & makeup dept. later to see if he could get his hands on some beards. “not that i don’t already have an idea, but what made you go for lady m? i feel like a lot of people — gender be damned — might be gunning for that part. hell, the third years might try to show us up. it is the last show,” and the moment nate says it, something clicks. it’s their last production together as a cohort. and without orson. something about it feels super ominous, especially in the wake of the events from the masque ball, but he hopes it’s just his nerves.

texts | palmer bros.

jason: aren't what?? nate you know i don't understand your memes i don't know what "yknow....👀" means

jason: i mean he's arrogant and i have to leave every time he rehearses because it gets under my skin but he's not /terrible/. unlike josephine.

jason: honestly, yeah i'm down. parents will be very disappointed in our sacrilege but whatever

nate: it's not a meme, GRANDPA! i was just trying to have some couth and double check that you & mathias aren't doing the horizontal tango? ....taking a trip to pound town? .......playin hide the sausage?

nate: fucking, jason

nate: hell yeah. meet me outside the castle in 20 min. ive got a half bottle of gin, two candles, a mortar & pestle, and three books w/ weird Latin phrases and drawings. let's get weiiiiiird

bxstvrd​:

DATE & TIME: around twilight….u know for the Ambiance LOCATION:Outside the FAB AVAILABILITY: Taken @aldysfool​

Jonah hated rehearsals with everything in him this semester. Hated being relegated to the background, hated watching other people twirl through the spotlight, hated that he would never again feel the golden hue grace his face at Alderidge. He’d snuck out early for a smoke, knowing that he wouldn’t be in anymore scenes, but he turned, surprised, when he heard the doors of the FAB swing open behind him, feeling a certain awkwardness when he realized it was Nate coming out to break his solitude. Because living with Nate, he could avoid him easily, had mastered the art of hiding in plain sight from both of his roommates, but out here, in the open, he couldn’t avoid him… and he was even more surprised to find he didn’t want to.

There was a surprising amount of discomfort when his desire to stay brushed up against his instinct to run, and it made Jonah irritable when he didn’t want to be. He caught himself, thankfully, before he lashed out and said something he didn’t mean, but he did say, brusquely, without looking at Nate, “I hope you didn’t come out here because of me. I was fine before, and I’ll keep being fine after you’re gone, so… there’s no need to check on me. And if you didn’t follow me out here, well, great, but there’s plenty of space that you can occupy that’s not also in my space. So.”

.

rehearsal nate is a different kind of nate; less partying, less recreational drug usage, less deviant behavior. except on the weekends. and yeah, macbeth is fun and he’s actually not hating rehearsal. even being onstage with grace isn’t the total soul sucker it used to be when orson was around. heidi felt different as a director, and nate appreciated her willingness to play along with his antics — to some degree, at least. there came a point in rehearsal when he wouldn’t be needed for a while, and while nate normally loved to sit in the back of the rehearsal space and doodle in his script while watching his fellow thespians work on stage, his phone buzzes and he doesn’t even look at it to know what time it is. he grabs his backpack and heads towards the doors. 

when he opens them and sees jonah, nate smiles for only a moment before it’s replaced by a raised eyebrow. the moodiness on this one. nate rolls his eyes, “somebody’s in a good mood. ...anyway, you don’t own the sidewalk and secretly we both know you enjoy my company, so there’s that. now if you’ll excuse me,” he looks around, “i have a date.” the lights around the FAB aren’t bright enough to completely illuminate the surrounding grounds, but nate is sure that he’ll find what he’s looking for if he stands here long enough. 

“quick, random question: you allergic to small, furry animals?”