Papers Out!

The Narrator

Sometimes I find that the narrator for stories is just far too boring in most stories that I read. I like narrators that either have more fucking personality or just say the most random shit (for example the wonderful Lemony Snicket in Series of Unfortunate Events). Give the narrator some fucking sass. Make them swear. Make them question what the fuck they're witnessing.

Make your narrator a character. Make them make the reader question the character and story by throwing in off hand comments when telling the story. Make them insult the reader. Make them call us all the fuck out in the most insulting way possible.

“I can’t believe I’ve never noticed before.”

“Noticed what?”

“How similar our powers are.”

“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh, I think you do.”

Snippet 4

The door closes behind them, leaving them all alone. In the room. In the bedroom. With the lone bed looming over them.

It was their wedding night.

Hero swallows hard, grabbing the white dress and moving away from her nemesis. The only reason why she married him was because of their families, their families who had no idea they were enemies.

"Well," Villain spoke up, turning to his enemy with a wry smile. "That's that. That just leaves us and some traditions. Don't it?" He takes his jacket off, raising his eyebrows at her.

Hero clenched her jaw. "If you think for one second-"

"Relax." Villain rolls his eyes. "I don't wanna do it with you either, it's best I don't really follow traditions."

"Me either." Hero crosses her arms.

"But..." Villain starts. "It is tradition."

Hero looks at him, narrowing her eyes.

"But I'm not evil." Villain scoffs. "That...evil." He corrects.

Hero rolls her eyes.

The ropes were incredibly thick, bounding the hero tightly to the chair. They tried to wiggle their way out but the ropes only dug deeper into their flesh. Shoot shoot shoot.

[Hero] gazed at their friends who banged against the container desperately, cursing at the criminal as they stalked towards the hero.

"You've got two choices, dear hero." [Villain] murmured as they held a controller with two buttons in front of their face. "Incinerate the rest of the city or incinerate your friends."

"Screw you." [Hero] spat in [Villain]'s face. Their lover simply laughed as they wiped off the spit. If the hero knew who the love of their life really was, they would've never said yes.

"If you don't make a choice, I'll just press them both. And remember either option, you choose..." [Villain] pressed their lips onto their captive's cheek, grazing a finger over the ring on [Hero]'s villain. "You're stuck with me."

"Honey?" [Villain] leaned on the window frame.

"Go away." [Hero] grumbled. "I 'cheated' on you. Remember?"

"No, that was [Civilian]'s heart you squashed." [Villain] snorted, caressing the poor hero's face. "When I wear this costume, I'm your secret criminal lover. The one you made out with in the parking lot."

"Shut up!"

"They're never going to let you out of this cell, knowing who you are." [Villain] pouted. "It's nearly impossible for anyone to look at you the same way again."

"I wish you could've just broke up with me instead of resorting to such low tactics." [Hero] mumbled. "It's not working, I'm not coming to join you so easily."

"Pumpkin, you're going to end up being a villain either way." Their lover laughed. "Whether you come crying back into my arms or not, I'm going to love seeing you turn into a monster."

“You’re late again.”

“I had to stop a bank robbery.”

“That’s no excuse.”

“There were hostages!”

“I don’t care.”

“Sure, you wouldn’t. You’re a villain.”

“Ex-villain.”

“Yeah right, you think anyone’s going to buy that?”

“…I’ll have to set up a parent-teacher conference to discuss your frequent tardiness.”

“Ha! Jokes on you pal, I don’t even have parents!”

"Stop calling me that."

"Why? I think it's a lovely name. It fits you."

"It's not my name."

"Your birth certificate, the real one, says it is because that's what I picked out for you the day you were born."

Dear Closeted People On Tumblr...

How do I pretend to be straight?

What do straight people talk about? How do I sit properly? How do I make it seem like I'm not distracted by a girl's beauty and I am indeed enchanted by the non-existing handsomeness of a boy? How does one breath in a gay panic?

I like to think maybe when Thomas Wayne was still alive, he was almost as bad as Bruce and his circus crew of children is when it comes to keeping himself alive and Alfred would have to drug him to get him to sleep

Like maybe Thomas was like Tim Drake levels of overworking and shit like that

I also imagine that he hopped and tried to raise Bruce to have some self perseverance but low and behold he’s worse then his father.