I Will If That’s What She Wants 😍

suckinf

A Horse walks into a bar . . .

. . . The Bartender sees such a vivid depth of despair and ennui in the Horse's eyes, like the Horse has stared into the abyss and found the infinite void of nothingness so deep that the Horse could no longer believe that he himself nor anyone nor anything else existed.

To say something exists requires knowledge of self, which requires knowledge of existence of the self, an obviously impossible leap of logic, absurd to even attempt to conceive or contemplate.

The Bartender, in that single instant within the Horse's mind, became the nothingness the Horse perceived, and thus was rendered speechless.

If neither the Horse, nor the Bartender, nor the bar itself can be said to exist, then why should he ask, how could he ask, "Why the long face?" The question can have no meaning, and that which has no meaning cannot be stated.

The Bartender, dumbstruck, not by realization of mortality but by fundamental doubt that he was ever alive, gazes into the endless depth of the Horse's eyes, and asks him, "Sir, I beg you say, do I exist?"

The Horse replies, "Neighhhh..."

cunt suckinf birch

17 questions

tagged by @blckwidowbucky

nicknames: d, dani

zodiac: scorpio

height: 5’8”

last thing i googled: characters in hercules

followers: 20 (wow? i love you all thank you sm!)

song stuck in my head: less than zero, the weeknd (also blinding lights but specifically the super bowl halftime version where it goes from house of balloons into blinding lights)

how much sleep: 5 hours, 6 if i’m lucky

lucky number: no idea

dream job: wanted to be a lawyer. but instead just trying to survive rn.

wearing: sweatpants, post malone t-shirt

favorite song: rn it’s either POSTALMONDCLARITY by bilmuri or less than zero by the weeknd

favorite instrument: piano

aesthetic: irl i prefer darker tones. i live for a good dark red, or black. can never go wrong with a nice dark red wine color either. not sure what others would describe that as

favorite author: of the only series i completed, suzanne collins

favorite animal noise: a cat purring 🥺

something random: i have no brain cells so this was hard to do but i did it anyways yay me

i don’t know who all to tag, if you wanna do it absolutely feel free and just say i tagged you ❤️

oh yeah it’s demon time 😈😈😈

Day 4: Thirsty Thursday

we all knew it was coming so bring it on baby! welcome to day four of the two year anniversary party, thirsty thursday! now i know you all know how this works and don’t need me to tell you but just in case feel free to send it

NSFW headcanons

NSFW edits

your favorite spicy fic

NSFW concepts about your favorite characters 

basically let’s all be whores together shall we? since we’re gettin slutty today anything that needs to be will be tagged with NSFW!

tagging some moots below the cut!

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maybe right for valentine’s day?

Anyways

I have a nail appointment on Friday and I don't know what to do

The iOS Toggle is Here!

Per the Jan 11th announcement, you can now see posts tagged with banned** tags and view flagged blogs on the iOS app.

To do this, open tumblr in a browser (this setting is not accessible on the iOS app itself) and go to your account settings. Then, click the “Hide Sensitive Content” toggle in the “Filtering” section. This setting is automatically turned on for everyone by default. Here’s what the toggle looks like when it has been turned OFF (it will be highlighted blue when on):

But wait, you’re not done! For this setting to take effect, you must also make sure you’ve updated the tumblr app to version 22.5.2 (or higher). To update the app, go to the app store, click your profile icon in the top right corner, and scroll down until you reach the updates section. If tumblr displays an “Update” button, click it. You can check the version number by clicking “more” in the update description.

If you’ve already updated to version 22.5.2, make sure to restart the app after toggling the sensitive content setting.

That’s it, you’re done!

**This has no effect on anyone using tumblr via any other browser or app. All toggling this setting does is remove the recent iOS-only hardbanned tags and give iOS app users the same tumblr experience as everyone else. The soft ban on certain “NSFW” tags that’s been in effect since the Great Purge of 2018 is still in effect, at least as of right now. To understand the difference between softbanned and hardbanned tags check out my post about it HERE.

Also, a quick note to content creators: Even with this toggle, I would avoid using any of the banned tags whenever possible because posts with those tags will still be completely hidden (in searches and on dashboards) on the iOS app for anyone who doesn’t know about this workaround. Fortunately, it seems tumblr is currently reviewing the list and walking back some of the tags that were originally banned, seemingly for no reason as they had nothing to do with sensitive content. Most have not been reversed yet. Keep an eye on the banned tags list and continue to check tags yourself since @bannedtags​ doesn’t have all of them.

This solution is better than nothing, but we’re not out of the woods yet.

aw cute!

you're a bitch that's my opinion

send your anonymous opinions of me

and yet anyone who supports him is unoriginal and bigoted like you! if the boot fuckin fits, huh?

Are you a trump supporter? I really want to get to know you!

anyone who supports him is a retard

this was absolutely amazing omg i’m such a whore for this man

Poor Little You.

Summary: With Defending Jacob filming underway and Chris on set for most of the week, you’re left with little more than your imagination. One little video is sent, one that you cannot get out of your head and though you’d like to think of yourself in control, you’re anything but.  Words: 2614 Type: RPF. Chris Evans x (undescribed) reader Warnings: mentions of masturbation/edging, oral sex (f), light nipple play, dirty talk, demanding Chris, light asphyxiation, unprotected sex. 

Not me re-appearing and slinking away again out of shame… but, this was written for @andy–barber who encouraged me to post it here to give a little more content to the Chris fandom. Please be kind as it’s the first time I’m posting him here, but likes/reblogs/asks are welcomed to ease my nervous heart :) all of my girls are undescribed, though if something stands out making it otherwise, please let me know and I’ll amend this. 

A big, big thank you to my Lisey for being my BETA and giving this piece the much needed check over before posting. 

_

“You can’t just walk back in here like that and not expect me not to do anything,” you say, straddling Chris’s thighs as your hands wrap around his wrists, placing them on either side of his head. 

“Walk in like what?” he tries his wrists, giving them a little tug to see how much give you’re prepared to allow him. 

“With that swagger,” you lightly kiss him, “and that smirk,” another kiss, “wearing that aftershave you know I can’t resist on you,” a slightly deeper kiss this time, “That suit.” 

“I thought you wanted me home as soon as possible?” he asks, desperate to cup the back of your head and roll you onto your back, but he’s having fun watching you think that you’re in charge. You both know he can flip you over and be on top of you within seconds if he wants to but the anticipation of when he will do it only excites you further. 

“I got my wish it seems.”

“But at what cost?” 

Only your dignity, but he doesn’t need you to admit that. You both know it with the way you pounced on him the second he stepped through the door. He’d barely finished shrugging out of his outer coat when your fingers were touching his tie, seconds away from undoing it when he’d given you a look. He’d picked you up, hands securing you beneath your ass as he’d carried you to the bedroom. 

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if you watch euphoria please respond to this i NEED to talk to someone about the newest episode i’m DYING INSIDE