Aquueerius - Six Ways From Sunday

"Cycle", 2012

New stamp and new prints!

Acrylic on old reader-page. (Stamp: Dick Blick Wonder-Cut)

"Triad", 2012

Acrylic on old reader-page. (Stamp: Wonder-Cut by Dick Blick)

I think I would leave sunflowers and blackberries at your shrine. Perhaps goldenrod

Sun flowers and sun-mer berries for the sun gremlin familiar?

I bless your offering with a pressed penny bearing an entirely inscrutable image (although iirc, it's a picture of a pressed penny that is also stamped with a picture of a pressed penny that is stamped with a picture of a pressed penny that is stamp w...), and a secret handshake that you won't know until the moment you need it.

birththey suit

The June Submission for Blackbird

So much has been going on lately! New stamps, new cards, new writing. Etcetera Etcetera. 

For my June submission to the magazine Blackbird, I decided to write a poem in ballad-form, based on a mixture between Norse Mythology and Scandinavian/Christian folklore.

     "Out was Ask upon a Day

And Embla did the washing

Out hung linens fresh and sweet

Yet her children needed washing.

     "Out was Odin on the Day

And through the forest riding

And with him Hoenir and Lodur

Upon that Day a riding.

     "Fast they came to Embla's house

And went they to her knocking

Inside did Embla wash her babes

When her lords they came a knocking.

     "Pleased she was upon that day

For half her babes were drying

But shamed was she upon that day

For half her brood was filthy.

     "Beneath the floor she hid her brood

The ones still needing washing

And came back Embla to her door

To answer them a knocking.

     "In came they as she bidded them

And they began a talking

Of earthen songs and goings on

And babes in cradles rocking.

     "Wholesome kin you have my dear

Said Odin while a talking

Yes, my lone said Embla dear

Whilst they four were talking.

     "But Odin knew this false to be

For he was one All-Seeing

And spied he more of Embla's brood

Down below unseeing.

     "There they are and there they stay!

Said the three lords shouting

To us you lied our Embla dear

Upon your husband's outing.

     "So from the babes below did

Hoenir take their feeling

And Lodur paled their rosy cheeks

And Odin hushed their breathing.

     "So man-folk here above belong

In the daylight shining

And elf-folk Embla left for shame

In shadows dark and pining."

(One note: this is my original work. You can share this, but if you do so, please cite me and this cite as a reference! This was written by myself, Benjamin Spick, in May of 2012) 

it was a gender

If tonight the moon should arrive like a lost guide crossing the fields with a bitter lantern in her hand,

her irides blind, her dresses wild, lie down and listen to her find you; lie down and listen to the body become

the promise of no other, the sleeper in the garden in its own arms, the exile in its own autumnal house.

You have woken. But no one has woken. You are changed, but the light of change is bitter, the changing

is the threshold into winter. Traveler, rememberer, sleeper, tonight, as you slumber where the dead are, if the moon’s hands

should discover you through fire, lie down and listen to her hold you, the moon who has been away

so long now, the lost moon with her silver lips and whisper, her body half in winter,

half in wool. Look at her, look at her, that drifter. And if no one, if nothing comes to know you, if no song

comes to prove it isn’t over, tell yourself, in the moon’s arms, she is no one; tell yourself, as you lose

love, it is after, that you alone are the bearer in that changed place, you alone who have woken, and have

opened, you alone who can so love what you are now and the vanishing that carries it away.

Barn quilts near Coon Rapids, Iowa (northwest Guthrie County)

Sisters Outsider: Coming Home for Sister Freida Peoples

The end of 2014 + the beginning of 2015 brings Sister Outsider to ask “Who is Sister Freida Peoples?” 

As I was learning Sistory during my initiation period, I learned about the Order’s first black nun Sr. Freida Peoples. During this past year of very difficult conversations with non-Sisters of Color about my call for diversity, I was often reminded about how “diverse” the Order is by citing the that we had Sr. Freida AND Sr. Mystie (a bio cis-female). Insulting tokenism aside, the real gift came when Sr. Freida Peoples emerged out of the Sistorical ether and said “Hey Gurl” on Facebook. Now here Sister is.

Prior to furnishing these questions, I conducted a pre-interview with Sr. Freida over Skype and we went in and talked about everything from Nunway to monasteries to Ferguson. It was beauty full to connect with this Sister and to talk about what’s happening right now with Marriage Equality, technology booms, Black Lives Matter, etc. It was beauty full to share our stories without having to defend or feel defensive about what it means to be a Sister.

Of Color.

And beyond that, Sr. Freida’s smart as a whip + just as adorable. There’s a lot to know about this deep soul that’s traveled far + wide. Sisters, Saints, and Queerdos, I present, Sister Freida Peoples.

Below are the responses to questions I asked Sr. Freida to address. This is what Sister said…

From the cell of Sr. Freida Peoples, SPI (Novice Mistress in Distress Emeritus, SF Convent) in semi-voluntary exile in Omaha, NE)

Sister Baba: Who is Sr. Freida Peoples?

The person/being of Freida Peoples is where all of my paradoxes are resolved. If not resolved, they are held in a kind of dynamic tension, giving me an outlook on a new reality. Any problems I might have with identity (I do have three different names and 6 e-mail addresses) are put to rest in Freida.

I am more of my whole self as Freida. Freida is that liberated part of me. The part that is free because Freida works my whole self.Freida is possibly me at my best.

Now, if you are saying to yourself, “well, you haven’t been Freida in years!” I would say that it is not entirely true. I am, in a sense, always Sr. Freida, at least to the extent that he is my main point of synergy.

My nun self is all-encompassing. Freida can do (and does) everything that my professional chef self does, my ‘sleazy leather queen’ self does and what the male human me does. And better than them I have to say. That probably is the reason that Freida’s name is on the masthead of my Facebook page and my natal name ( Joseph) is merely parenthetically represented.

After all, I made Freida and nature and nurture made Joe. I am solely responsible for Sr. Freida Peoples, whether in habit or in mufti, and a whole “village” has had its share in Joe.

Sister Baba: Recount a story of ‘those early years” that shaped who you are today

You know, Sister, there isn’t one, as in a singular story that contributed to the shaping of my person. I have always known and felt that I was a complex organism emotionally and psychologically. It is part of the gift of being a person of color.

Certainly, I always experienced myself entirely different than I noticed that people outside of myself did. I all-ways knew that I was gay, even if I didn’t put it in those terms when I was just a kid. But to answer your question, there were incidents having to do with sexuality, for sure.

In 10th grade I had an English teacher, Mrs. Matthews , who tried very very hard to engage me as a student. I was a voracious reader (still am) and I devoured  all the assigned reading long before assignments were due. One day, she asked me if it were possible for me to stay for a bit after class—she wanted to talk to me, She said. I met her and she handed me a bunch of books tied with string. They were the books written by Mary Renault about Alexander of Macedon called “the Great.” She said that I should read those books and for extra credit, write a little summary not about books, but about Alexander the person. I don’t remember now how many but there were 3 or 4 books, I think and they were like “I, Claudius” a kind of almost dramatization of history with a few facts thrown in. But I was riveted to those pages. It was already a taken-for-granted fact that I was “gay” within the family (my uncle was a drag queen, I guess) and a non-issue except that my father was always talking to me about my future quality of life. He always stressed that homosexuality, though seemingly always present inhuman history, was not entirely approved of and in fact, more often than not looked down on.

Quite a different image was projected in those books about Alexander the Great and his “Persian Boy” and his lieutenant lover. I had known that Alexander was a major historical figure that everyone seemed to revere and here he was a homosexual like me!

My only other public reference was Christine Jorgenson, who caused a furor by changing his sex. I had read her autobiography and though I was fascinated as I read about the operation, especially about her fashion choices he made after he became a she (light green sweater with a dark green skirt and flats), I couldn’t exactly relate to his whole emotional and psychological turmoil. I wasn’t in turmoil and I played “war’ a lot as a boy. Alexander was my bud! This was important to me because the paradox (again) caused by my father’s parental concern for my future and this historical portrayal of a noble and powerful gay man. Sure, I had seen Milton Berle and Charles Nelson Riley but people laughed at them. I knew than that it was possible not to be laughed at but respected as a gay man.

Sister Baba: What do you value most?

It is certainly true and my friends will attest that I value human qualities more than human attributes or any “things” that a person can buy with money. For me, money is a tool, albeit a very necessary tool, but only that. I notice that in America if one works with things, one gets a lot of money for their work, while if one works with people, one doesn’t do quite as well monetarily. I value real-ness in people and I have great respect and admiration for people who, despite the pressure to become average, are stellar standouts nun-the-less.

Sister Baba: Share a Sister story that still gets you laughing.

You can imagine how scared I was in the early 80s. I came back from Denver and met Tom Lady Cocktail” Junnell right by Eber Electronics on Market Street and he almost immediately launched into this whole bewildering tale about all these people that were dying from some kind of pneumonia and some who also had this red stuff on their faces. I mean, medically, it was only some strains of incurable venereal disease from Viet-Nam that frightened me. It was told to me that the disease targeted gay men and my conspiracy theory self was rampant with speculation and I saw black suited men with genocide on their minds everywhere.

Flash forward to “the AIDS Crisis”. Sr. Florence Nightmare (Bobbi Campbell) is dying very publically, in fact he is dying as an activist-martyr and we, his Sisters are dying right along with him in a way. I remember two manifestations on 18th and Castro. One before his death at which he and his courageous lover, right along with his family were speakers and we novices and postulants collected money, for what I don’t remember. It was very sad. In fact a kind of depressed depression permeated the Order and several Sisters decided to become less involved at that time. I was also in the throes of a terrible addiction to methamphetamine and alternately manic and depressed within seconds. It was a terrible time for SPI and gay men everywhere. All one could see was loss and there seemed to be no end in sght and thus, no hope. Ok that’s the environment. Then Bobbi died.

Sr. Flo died as he had lived— with dignity. So, we had a manifestation on 18th and Castro. It was supposed to be solemn, I mean we all were sad and some of us were pissed off, sure that the US Government was targeting gay men. So, you know how it is, Sisters take it to the streets. Sr. Flo’s parents were taking him to his home town so there was not to be a SF funeral. This was our chance to memorialize him and eulogize him. Many of us were crying and here come Sr. Sadie Sadie Rabbi Lady to the stage. Now Sadie was a great talent. A good writer of comedy stuff and the nun Sadie was the quintessential “jewish mother” (talk about paradox- a jewish mother nun!). He had the accent, his schtick down pat. He had written this song about venereal disease and HIV-AIDS sung to the tune of “Don’t cry for Me , Argentina’ and it was high-larious . He performed it impeccably with gestures (he had this way of being largely chunky and diminutive at the same time) and his little fat face was all screwed up and he looked like Barbra Streisand’s grandmother. Something like “..just get away pneumocystis and go on away hepatitis…” with that face and accent.

Well, I started laughing IT WAS HIGH-LARIOUS and that laughter was contagious. It was a beautiful moment, a ray of light in all that gloom that day. I know that Gil’s name is mud in some quarters, but it is a fact that Sr. Sadie was phenomenal as a comedian and Sister Sadie Sadie Rabbi lady was a fab characterization and a funny-ass nun. So, when I think of that day, that performance, that very bageled jewish nun wth the humongous pointed Dixie cup grandma bird seed tits, I gotta smile.

Sister Baba: What is possible for the Sisters in this heightened moment in history?

Very simply, The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence are excellent at provoking relevant discussion on a wide variety and range of subjects. One could even say that is the unique CHARISM of a Sister of Perpetual Indulgence. Urgent questions concerning gender identity are still relevant, along with religion and gay sensibility and culture. I realize that is  broad answer, but like Aristotle, I favor going from the general to the particular.

The word as I had written it is CHARISM, which is defined on dictionary.com as  noun, plural charismata  /kəˈrɪz mə tə/

1.Theology. a divinely conferred gift or power.

2.a spiritual power or personal quality that gives anindividual influence or authority over large numbers of people.

3.the special virtue of an office, function, position,etc., that confers or is thought to confer on the person holding it an unusual ability for leadership,worthiness of veneration, or the like.

I guess that the point I was tryin to make is that there is more to being a “Sister of Perpetual Indulgence” than any one’s creation of a character and dressing it up in habit, wimple and veil. Indeed, a Sister is endowed NOT OF HIS OWN POWER OR WILL OR DESIGN a certain dignity intrinsic in and particular to being a fully-professed “Sister of Perpetual Indulgence.”

Before my next remarks, I want to underline that we are a talented bunch. Have always been so. However, not every Sister can do everything or is even comfortable doing everything . Certainly the Order has grown and with that growth has had to do legal stuff necessary and pertaining to ‘the brand.” That gives us a powerful forum. “Play Fair’ was powerful and very effective. I mean the Sisters, ‘those drag queens’ with that little pamphlet accomplished what the SF Board of Health could not (i.e. we disseminated information about STD’s that gay men took seriously).

So, on one level we, in our zany and madcap way, have an entrée` into our community that others do not. At some point, it doesn’t even matter who loves ‘drag’ or not, everyone loves and pays attention to “the Sisters.” That’s powerful. As you, Sister, have pointed out to us and to me, we can and should I think, step up our game and address issues with a broader scope :police abuse of power and responsibility, race, even wellness vis a vis food in the great way that we do. While I am glad that in some places same-sex “marriage’ is happening, personally, I think that there is a larger issue regarding marriage  itself, commitment and bonding and the legality of other models in our society that need addressing.  

While it is very true that I am primarily concerned with LGBT people, it is also true that we humans are not made to be either dependent or independent, but rather inter-dependent and some concerns of LGBT people are human concerns touching all life. You Sister Baba could have immense input into a kind of like Martha says, “omni-media” with SPI- TV, radio etc. In a word, we can and should do whatever the hell we want with the Sisters that want to do whatever and the world is our oyster. To do that, however, we would have to, of necessity, see the political concerns of any individual Sister as not personal but corporate. One can’t be selfish and a Sister of Perpetual indulgence at the same time.

Having said that, Sister, You will remember that I said ‘the world is our oyster.” To wit dear heart, You keep the shells and give me the pearls, please. Yust a little yolk….. I have been so serious and I am after all, a gender-fuck drag-nun!

Sister Baba: Do you have questions I have for Sisters worldwide?

OK. Before I ask questions, I’d like to use this forum to thank all of the Sisters for friending me on Facebook and who write to me and who comment on my page –no matter if I agree or not. I am completely and totally edified on a daily basis by what I see of the Sisters of today. I reference David Bowie’s song,”Oh! You pretty things!” And I mean that. I am glad to see the immense diversity you express and though I’m told there are many more Sisters-of-color than were when I ‘”entered’, I’d sure like to see more of you.

I have a special shout-out for Srs. Destiny le Femme and Clara and Teryn and well, all of you mad divas. Thanks for your warmth and welcome and I do not have adequate words (yeah right) to express that all of your stuff means to me personally. I feel like I have been in a foreign country for aeons and have just come out of a coma or other deep sleep. I do and will lean on you and I do need you.

If you have been following my dialogue with Vish, please know that we speak very plainly to each other as only true sisters can. We love each other and I credit his and Loganberry Frost’s insistence (Vish really insisted under the threat of losing his sponsorship) that I be initiated into transcendental meditation as saving my life. TM is a discipline that I practice “religiously” to this day. And one of my favorite memories is of we Sisters meditating together at the convent on Asbury Street.

My questions;

Where do you see your regional SPI convent in 5 years?

Where would you like t see the Order as a legal entity in 5 years?

Where do you see yourself as a Sister of Perpetual indulgence in five years?

What do you want SPI to do that we are not doing?

Some of you know that I was a catholic monk for some years AFTER I was in Perpetual indulgence and indeed Sr. Francis Diana is now. My monastic brothers and I often discussed the “relevance’ of monastic life in modern life

Do you discuss the”relevance” of SPI in our modern world? If so, what are your thoughts?

Is SPI ‘relevant’? if so, how? If not, why not?

Besides your participation in manifestations, how else do you participate in your order?

Do you like to do stuff outside of manifestations?

What don’t you like or are uncomfortable with?

Well, that’s it for me. I have been writing this for some hours and have not eaten. What do chefs eat after work? Anything. Everything. Burger Bitch. Mc idiots….. Also, I need a cocktail!

Peace, out xoxoxoxox Freida Peoples, SPI

(I swear and attest that the above is my true and real electronic signature and hereby give Sr. Baba Ganesh my permission to use this material as he sees fit; including editing, reprinting and publishing- FP, SPI)

can braid my hairs again