| Bub Breaks Down |

| bub breaks down |

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* impure regression - content warning : the little one wasn’t ever able to have a good childhood / was never able to be a child in a moral and emotional standpoint so they breakdown pretty bad while regressed. their caregiver does what they can to calm them and they, themselves get pretty worked up and worried. it’s all in the caregivers point of view.

🗝⌛️🕯🗝⌛️🕯🗝⌛️🕯🗝⌛️🕯🗝⌛️🕯🦴⌛️🕯

“ feelings hurt so bad, ‘ubba.”

the little one cried into the air, head resting on the back of the couch with their teary eyes shut as they gripped their bubba’s hands tight. their caregiver was kneeling on the floor in front of them, they had dropping down in front of their little one when the heard them wake up from a nap crying.

did the caregiver know why the little one had started crying?

no.

and that was scaring them a little bit- a lot.

they reached up in a hurry and wiped the stray tears falling down the little ones cheeks, watching as they put their head up and opened their oh so pitiful eyes.

“ shouldn’t do this, bubba. what the point? i’s not m kid, m no get this back.” the little ones face scrunched up in a sob, sinking down to the floor so that they could be closer to their bubba.

the caregiver sighed in realization.

the little got these feelings every so often- feelings of doubt, confusion, and grief.

they got these feelings because of their regression, they always wondered why they even regress- they weren’t really a child and they would never be a child again so why play pretend? shouldn’t they be living reality and come fo terms that their childhood wasn’t fair and they’ll never get to live it again?

all thoughts that the little one has cried out to the caregiver before.

the carer just pulled the little one close, hugging them tight and allowing them to get these things out. though, it seemed to be much worse than usual- their breathing was in between hiccups and their nose was stuffed, the tears were hot against the cg’s neck. they carer wouldn’t want the little one to get sick- that would make them even more upset.

slowly, they pulled back from the hug, trying their best to ignore the pitiful wail the little one let out at the action.

they placed their hand on the precious cheeks and wiped the scolding tears.

“Shh, bub. you’re going to get sick.” they shushed, trying to get the little one to calm down just a little bit.

it only caused them to cry louder, cries that came deep from their heart- they were so hurt. It made the caregivers own eyes tear up.

“ never gonna be m kid, never was allowed to be a kid- I hate this, I don’ like this.. ‘ubba.” they cried as the grabbed their bubba’s wrists, they held tightly and just cried harder.

it was scaring the carer- usually a quick hug and some reassurance got them to calm down. they didn’t even know what to do.

“I know.. I know, bubs.” they just comforted, hands staying on the flushed cheeks so that the little one would t snuggle back up into their neck and make it harder to breathe for themselves.

“I- I was never allowed to, ‘ubba. not fair- it was never fair, i’s will never get- get-“ the little one couldn’t breathe well anymore- tears making their throat close up as they started to cough.

the caregivers heart just shattered, the precious little one was in so much pain. there was nothing the could even do- the sounds of coughing was just worrying them.

“my baby, please.. breathe, you’re going to get sick. I hear you, I do. It’s not fair, it will never be fair that you weren’t given the chance to be a kid.” the cg tried to sympathize, moving their hands to the little ones shoulders, breathing deeply in- hoping the other would follow them.

slowly but surely they did. looking at their bubba and nodding slightly, letting them know they were listening- letting them know they didn’t want to get sick.

they sat there for a while, at some point- the little one ended up in the carer’s lap, facing away from the and facing the couch, a blank stare was on their face, body and mind coming down from the episode.

though, the caregiver knew at some point they would have to get up. so, the gently moved their little one around and picked them up, an arm holding their legs and shushing the little one as the got startled.

“I’ve got you, bub. you’re here with me, you’re allowed to let go for a while, yeah? I’ll take care of you.” they whispered into the little ones hair, laying a soft kiss on top of it.

they led them both to the bedroom, gently laying the little one down on the bed.

“close your eyes, okay? i’m going to go get a wash cloth to wipe your face, I’ll be right back.”

the little didn’t say anything as their bubba walked to the bathroom, just laying with their eyes closed.

the caregiver walked to the bathroom quickly, grabbing a washcloth and wetting it without thinking much so they weren’t leaving their baby for long.

they go back and sit on the edge of the bed, wincing when the little one gets startled.

“ ‘s just me, bubs.” they soothe, running their hand through the little ones hair and presses the cold rag to their warm, flushed cheeks.

it is peaceful, the little one just lets out soft sighs, no doubt feeling exhausted.

“all done. thank you, petal.” the carer whispers and settles a soft kiss on top of their head once more, throwing the wash rag to the floor- they’ll pick it up later, and then they climb in next to their little one.

they hug them tight, sighing themselves when they feel the little one relax completely.

“i’ve got you- i’m able to take care of you, my baby. i like taking care of you.” they whisper into their hair.

they would get through this.

the little one would find a way to get themselves through this bump, they always have and always will- with or without their caregiver by their side.

“goodnight, sweetheart.”

the two sleep peacefully and watch the little ones favorite shows when they awake.

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