Hi, Coffee-in-rain! Thank You For Your Fics! I Love Vulnerable Hannibal So Much, And I Reread Each Of

worrying you may have skin cancer because you've had a new weird spot on your body since february of last year (and it never goes away and is raised and definitely not a mole similar to other moles you've had your entire life) yet being scared to get it checked because medical debt is terrifying and the wait for an appointment is highkey long as hell is literally america core and i'm so tired of dumb out of touch bitches like conservatives and tr*mp and m*sk saying stuff like 'we're the land of the free and should be proud.' it's not free if you're not fucking rich. it's not free if you can't even go to a doctor when you really need it because insurance is fucking useless and not at all helpful in putting a dent in the insane medical bills you end up with. medical bills in america can be life ruining and that shit terrifies me. also if it is in fact skin cancer, i'd rather live in oblivion because treatment would be way too fucking expensive. so if i ever stop posting my fics one day out of the blue without announcing why its probably because i'm dead from possible skin cancer. god i wish i was born somewhere in europe or canada where healthcare is seen as a human right instead of viewed as a fucking privilege 😔

I'm exploring this in my cliff house fic right now, but thoughts on potential abuse that took place during Hannibal's stay at the BSHCI?

They took his toilet and books. I get the feeling there was sleep and food deprivation. I think lot of the guards didn't treat him well when they had to deal with him. Not like Alana would do anything about that. Especially after they figure out he won't attack them or try to escape and they basically have a willing punching bag. (Especially after Will gets married, Hannibal loses what little fight he has)

What if as they start recovering from the fall and getting closer, Will starts to see little tells and triggers and starts to piece together that Hannibal was not in fact treated to a luxury stay under Alana's care as he thought. Cue Hannibal constantly denying that he has trauma and fighting the tlc Will is trying to give and Will dealing with the guilt in the aftermath for being the cause of it all. Bonus points if Will goes into a rage and goes after (or at least wants to) the people who hurt him and Hannibal gets all flustered about being protected and cared for

OMG I AGREE!! also very excited for your fic. i'll touch on Hannibal's abuse in the BSHCI because you know whump is my bread and butter 😏

firstly, i think Hannibal did indeed face abuse (emotional and physical) like gaurds being rough and not caring if he got thrashed around or injured on their end. like omg imagine if when Hannibal was in that dolly thing with the wheels (wearing his straitjacket), one of the gaurds who absolutely hated him sped up the dolly thing and roughly pushed it over so Hannibal landed face first onto the floor with no way to brace himself and got a bloody nose and black eye. i might write a fic about that actually: Will finding Hannibal sedated and crumpled on the floor with the dolly thing crushing him. 😭

sorry i got sidetracked, but anywho!! i do think Hannibal faced starvation and missed meals, too. maybe not consistently. but at least a few times during those three years. i bet it messed with his mind a lot more than he would willingly admit to himself and bring back memories of being chained up with a growling stomach. on those nights, Hannibal probably struggled with night terrors.

i know this next part is so niche and not everyone needs to agree with it, but my headcanon is after Hannibal's toilet was removed there was at least one instance where laxatives were snuck into Hannibal's food or water, or Hannibal was restrained and forcefully given an enema by a few of the gaurds so they could watch Hannibal suffer without access to a toilet.

another headcanon i have is that sometimes Hannibal regressed in the BSHCI when the isolation and touch starvation became too unbearable. little Hannibal would curl up under the blanket and fold it over his head to be out of view when sucking his thumb for comfort and rocking himself to sleep. ohmygod what if i write a fic about that too?! 😭 Will going to visit Hannibal and Alana tells him Hannibal is regressed 💔 crying and i haven't even written it yet lmfao.

Hannibal regressed at least a few times. especially on his birthday or mischa's birthday because those are difficult days to be alone. Hannibal tried not to regress on Will's birthday because little Hannibal wouldn't think Will wanted to see him ever again.

going back to the toilet removal and laxative/enema torture: Hannibal probably regressed in those moments because such a loss of control was nearly foreign and unbearable.

Hannibal was probably triggered with memories of being trapped in the cabin with the men who killed his family (before he became mute) and asking to use the bathroom yet being forced to hold it for as long as possible. even when it became agonizing, especially when he was sick and couldn't hold in diarrhea. the men would punish young Hannibal with beatings and not give him anything to clean up the mess or throw him out in the snow for a period of time as punishment or lessen the amount of food he would be given, if any at all.

in the BSHCI, Hannibal would probably try to mask any signs of regression, though, so mutism was the best coping mechanism in those circumstances.

also omg we have the same brain because i've been thinking about Hannibal being sleep deprived in the BSHCI since winter. my headcanon is that it would occur on rare occasions, but be enough to send Hannibal into a regressed state. for two days (because that's as long as the guards would have during the weekend when Alana would not be there) lights would not be turned off when scheduled to be and music would blare loud in the speakers constantly. little Hannibal would be overwhelmed and shove both hands over his ears to soften the sound as much as possible, but it wouldn't offer much relief at all. i might write a fic about this too omg because imagine Will seeing a sleep deprived version of little Hannibal sobbing for silence and darkness and sleep in the BSHCI. 😭

now, on the topic of Will noticing signs of Hannibal's abuse/mistreatment

the first time Hannibal felt the urge to use the bathroom in Will's presence would probably bring up feelings of unease and resurfacing emotions and memories. especially if Hannibal was injured and incapable of getting around without assistance from Will. Hannibal would most likely involuntarily regress in that moment because there was (in little Hannibal's mind) a very high likelihood of being denied the option to seek out a bathroom and a very high likelihood of being tortured in such a way that made losing control of one's bladder or bowels inevitable and a very high likelihood of being punished for it. it would shock Will, seeing Hannibal fall into a state of regression and clearly be distressed about being allowed to use the bathroom.

my headcanon is that Will instantly adores little Hannibal and feels an overwhelming sense of protectiveness and fondness for this newfound version of Hannibal.

another moment where Hannibal may regress post-fall is during the first time Hannibal is hungry and it is not at all close to dinner time yet. Hannibal knows asking to have a snack is not some huge feat or something to be wary of while in Will's presence. but regressing temporarily eases Hannibal's worries about possibly being denied food (because Hannibal is hopeful Will would not deny little Hannibal the comfort of food). little Hannibal is cautious in asking Will for a snack and Will can sense it's a monumental moment. Will rushes to bring little Hannibal a snack and settles into bed and hand-feeds little Hannibal every bite to make it clear there is no reason for Hannibal to ever again be wary about asking for food. regressed or non regressed.

these are all my thoughts i have right now, but i may come back to this eventually and add some more. thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and sending in this ask. i would absolutely love love love talking more about vulnerable Hannibal with y'all. please feel free to send in more asks or share your thoughts with me about vulnerable Hannibal! <3

THIS THIS THIS! i agree with y'all 100%

Let me preface this by saying, please know, these are only my thoughts about Will and Hannibal post-fall, and I'm genuinely not forcing them down anyone's throat. Please don't come at me for saying this. Anyone is welcome to disagree. I'm just trying to engage in a polite discussion.

I don't understand when people say stuff along the lines of: "Hannibal would not want Will to wear plaid flannels to an opera. He would make Will change into something nicer." or "Hannibal would have a hard time slumming it with Will post-fall when they're on the run. He would complain about everything, refuse to eat gas station food and be picky about everything from their sleeping arrangements to their clothes to their choices of meal, etc."

Because Hannibal literally did live through very tough times as a child and would be able to adapt in those circumstances as an adult. Hannibal would probably be worrying about Will's health and comfort (and willingness to stay by his side) much more than the reality of having to eat a gas station hot dog or worrying about what clothes Will chose to wear (which lets be real: Hannibal never criticized Will's fashion choices ever in the show--not once--there's no inclination in the show that alludes to Hannibal finding Will's outfits ugly at all). Hannibal literally wears plaid patterns himself. Hannibal wouldn't want to change every single thing about Will. Hannibal doesn't want a copy and paste version of himself. That would be boring and not at all satisfying. Hannibal wants Will. Like... Will's clothes are a part of himself and his self expression. I think Hannibal finds Will's fashion sense something worth adoring and allowing Will free reign over, because it's what makes Will... Will.

Also because food is so important to Hannibal (and there's food insecurity stemming from his childhood), I don't think Hannibal would ever dream of telling Will certain foods are off limits or shame him for eating junk food if Will wanted a little sweet treat. He would want Will to indulge in every enjoyable aspect of eating. He would probably ask Will about childhood memories and the emotions tied to such junk food because it would be an opportunity to learn more about Will's past and quirks.

"hannibal HATES wills plaids" "hannibal would never let will wear plaid after the fall" hannibal gently dressed will in his softest plaid shirt and tucked him into bed before turning himself in to the fbi when will awoke and rejected him. i dont think he gives a fuck to be honest

All I can think about is Hannibal cooking his and Will’s final shared meal in Mizumono. He probably struggled to blink back tears, knowing this was his last chance to suggest (in his own way) for Will to choose him. For Will to accept who he was—the whole of him that he never thought he would share with anyone before. Imagine if he had to dab on concealer to hide the puffy state of his red-rimmed eyes and the swollen state of his nose (which felt raw and irritated after he’d blown it a thousand times) so that Will wouldn’t realize he’d been crying because he wanted to look perfect for Will one last time.

i’m crying and sniffling into my sleeve, rolling around my room like a bowling ball & gnawing on my pillow because this was absolute perfection !! tysm for writing this <3

Kinktober Day 10: Overstimulation + Face-Sitting

y'all are getting a twofer today!! this is my first time writing in the omegaverse, so pls be kind! and please send @coffee-in-rain all the love for giving me the idea for this prompt <3

Hannibal wakes from a heated dream with a need that can’t be ignored—and Will, half-asleep but all too eager, is more than happy to help. What begins as a midnight indulgence quickly spirals into an overwhelming game of push and pull, as Will’s relentless appetite pushes Hannibal to the edge and beyond.

hope y'all enjoy, please let me know what you think!! <3

omg this is literally the type of landscape i'm envisioning Hannibal and Will living on in my post-fall amnesiac Hannibal oneshot i've been cooking up

River Through Green by The Traveller

obsessed with post-fall hannigram domesticity. cleaning blood from each others wounds. quiet naps next to each other. gentle hands in hair, loving and soft. gazes at each other just to marvel. strong winters where one comes back covered in snow, just to have the other pull their wet clothes off and tuck them in soft blankets, giving them tea to warm up. showering together after killing, not shower sex, but gentle touches, one holding the other to their chest. post-fall hannigram domesticity.

finally finished and posted the first chapter!

wring me of all the blood i shall bleed (chapter 1)

Post-Fall, Will is growing more and more distant by the day. Hannibal, on the other hand, is unwilling to speak—be it a result of brain damage or a self-imposed state of mutism. Life on the run is as peaceful as it can be. Until Will enters a new relationship in an effort to stem the curious glances and endless questions from the locals.

vulnerable Hannibal fic idea that's been cooking in my brain:

Hannibal and Will's post-fall relationship does not progress or develop in the manner Hannibal expected. He expected them to become closer, but Will is growing more distant each day. Hannibal has brain damage from a head injury, and it results in his emotional threshold being weaker, more fragile in a way he cannot control and struggles to explain. He misses Will, even from across the room. He gets anxious each time Will leaves the house. He's hidden one of Will's shirts underneath his pillow so he can fall asleep with Will's scent, even if Will is down the hall or out of the house for the night.

Will gets a job because it's a way to blend in. He knows Hannibal is behaving differently. He thinks what Hannibal needs is space and time to adjust. He starts a relationship with a woman he meets at a bar because it'll help them blend in even more. People won't ask questions or think it odd if Hannibal is rumored to be Will's relative (a distant uncle). He doesn't believe he could engage in an intimate (or even physical) relationship with Hannibal. Not yet.

They still have many past issues to discuss and resolve. But it's difficult to do so when Hannibal is mute. Trust between them is fragile and Will's new girlfriend puts a strain on their relationship. Will tells Hannibal there's no reason to be jealous. He tells Hannibal: "I'm not doing this to hurt you. I can't be what you need right now. I'm not there yet, and I don't know if I ever will be." He starts spending more and more time out of the house because the silence is suffocating. He never brings his girlfriend around. But she invites Will and Hannibal over to her house for Christmas day to exchange presents.

Will agrees for appearance's sake and asks Hannibal to make a list of things he would want for Christmas. He leaves a piece of paper (with written instructions to make a christmas list) and a pen on the counter for Hannibal before heading out to work. He comes back home hours later and opens the lid of the trashcan to toss something. There's a crumpled piece of paper balled up in the corner, buried in the pile, but only slightly visible if one were to look for it. He unfolds it and smooths out the creases to read the words written on the page.

It's Hannibal's christmas list and there are only three sentences written down: one hug. for at least thirty seconds, if you are willing. the lights can be off, if you wish.

Will's heart crumbles. He wonders why it was thrown in the trash until he sees a second christmas list on the counter in pristine condition. There are only two words written on that one: your company.

Intro Post

name: ophelia (or ophie if you don't feel like spelling it out lol)

i've realized i'm trans within the last year and even though i prefer they/he pronouns now i don't think names have to be gendered. and ophelia is a name i've always loved since my teenage years. so it feels fitting to pick something new that fits with me a little better now. i understand people may forget to use 'ophelia' because it's nothing i've ever used in fandom, so it is totally okay if anyone calls me coffee instead. either is fine with me <3

i'm an adult (twenties). minors DNI because it's for my own comfort. please respect that. i write mature and sometimes explicit content. if i don't see your age (indicating your 18+) in your profile then i won't interact with you.

i love writing Hannigram fics centered around Hannibal being vulnerable. also whump, too, because it is sooo scrumptious to explore Hannibal's composure shattering and Will being there to witness it. anyone can send me fic prompts or send me a ramble in my ask page box (is that what it's called? 😭 idk but mine is titled "yap with me! ♡") to discuss Hannibal's vulnerability because i would love love love to yap my heart out about it with y'all (especially regarding regressed Hannibal/little Hannibal)!!

i use the tag "traumatized hannibal my beloved" and (and my newest one: "housewife hannibal my beloved") for nearly every (if not all) of my rambles about Hannibal's vulnerability. the tag "coffeeasks" is where i answer questions/respond to people's ask submissions! the tag "coffee rambles" is where my rambles go.

here is my vulnerable Hannibal fic rec list

(i might reorganize it one day very soon).

my AO3 is coffeeinrain!

will who is so fond of spiders and gently cradles them in his hands and settles them on a leaf outside his house vs hannibal who absolutely DESPISES them because they remind him of the days spent in that cabin with mischa during the winter when spiders would hide in his shoes and in her sister’s braids and he’s BEGGING for will to crush and kill it