Johnny "Soap" Mactavish Is The Kind Of Dad Who Throws Your Kids Around For Fun, Tossing Them Into The

to the anon who just asked me if i ever shut up

no bitch i do not lmfao

I used to date an older guy (like mid 40s) a few years back and I always got stupidly turned on when he fixed stuff around his house?? Like, he just knew hot to do it and did it. No googling, just him and his tools. Feel like it would fit somewhere in your older bf Simon stuff.

god love a fully capable “fuck it i’ll do it” type of man 🫶🏼

you know that your older bf!simon doesn’t believe in hiring tradespeople for a service.

“why would i pay someone to fuck about in my home?”

“they’re not fucking about, si! they’d be fixing the sink”

“i’ll do it”

you have no doubt that simon was more than capable of fixing things around the house but you also wanted him relaxing when he was home.

turns out he couldn’t relax at the thought of another man doing something for you.

so you let him do it, you threw your hands up and waved your white tea towel in defeat as you heard him banging around in the garage for tools.

hearing the faint sounds of grunting and the occasional swear word coming from the bathroom, you thought it might pay to go and see how he was getting on.

fucking hell.

simon was on his back, arms stretched up above him as his hands dwarfed the pipe they were wrapped around. t-shirt riding up, lines of his stomach leading right to his belt, knees bent and boots firmly planted on the floor, you could honestly just-

“oi, you gonna’ stare or help me?”

now how the fuck?

“your heads in the cupboard, how did you know-“

“i always know where you are, pass me the wrench”

crouching down beside him, you handed it over and stayed down there to watch him work. scarred knuckles wrapped around the handle of the tool, other palm flat against the base of the sink so you could see the veins.

he was something else entirely.

“how d’you know how to do all this?”

“taught m’self, come hold this”

you reached over to replace where his palm was so he could have both hands back. “but why? surely other people don’t learn all this?”

“other people don’t care about their sweet’art not having to lift a finger- move your finger for me”

the more you stretched to hold the sink, the more you felt yourself losing traction with it. naturally, simon noticed before you did.

“y’need to get closer, cm’ere”

tools landing to the side of him, two large hands plucked you up till you were dropped in his lap. precarious situation but you couldn’t deny the sink was a lot easier to reach.

you stayed like that, letting simon work in peace as you enjoyed your view. honestly, he could invite you to the end of the world and you’d just be happy to hold his hand.

one hand splayed out on his chest, the other holding the sink, you suddenly felt a tickle forming at the end of your nose. before you knew it, you were pulling your hand back to scratch it- the one holding the sink.

you panicked, realising it could very well land on simon’s head. but it didn’t, it stayed completely still. face screwing up, you leant in again to give the sink a nudge only to find out it was totally fixed.

“what the hell, si? why’d you have me doing all that?”

you saw the smirk on his face as he flashed a look over at you. suddenly, you realised you weren’t the only one enjoying the view.

the hand that didn’t have the wrench came out to give you a pat on the side of your hip.

“c’mon sweet’art, i can’t get anything outta’ this?”

random headcanons i have about VALORANT agents

(this got out of hand but heres some hcs i have that i like are pretty cool (probs pt. 1))

depending on the day, phoenix, skye, astra, chamber, kj, raze, neon, and reyna are completely non-understandable with their accents combined with their slang (this makes it terrible for anyone trying to talk to them about something important that day, especially when kj, raze, and skye are all hanging out together)

kj speaks in german whenever she's super mad but has also started to speak it more frequently after she teaches skye, raze, yoru, and cypher some german words (mainly curses or insults) [i had a friend whose family was Italian and she knew some words from it so she would teach us some of them. they were mainly curse words but it was funny when she called someone a bitch in Italian to their face during class]

phoenix, yoru, and jett all try to learn each other’s native languages (excluding phoenix). it takes them a while but they can at least understand them when it’s being spoken and can talk in basic sentence

people who can cook: skye, astra, cypher, brimstone, jett, sage, neon, omen, and sova

people who will cook when necessary but it is babysitter level of cooking: breach, yoru, viper, killjoy, and reyna

people who aren’t allowed to touch the kitchen with a ten-foot pole: phoenix, raze, KAY/O, chamber

the warm-up crew is a group that trains together a surprising amount

brim, sage, and viper usually train together (brim occasionally with breach)

when yoru, jett, and phoenix can’t sleep or get up early they go train together or, when they’re still up, sit and talk with kj and raze in their labs/the living area/or any of their rooms

phoenix will give anyone a hug (unless they say otherwise), usually side hugs but he’s almost always touching someone (jett or yoru mainly) in some way

(he stands close to people so their arms touch, he gives everyone a hug or high five when they leave, he ruffles yoru’s hair when he walks by or when he wakes up in the morning, he cuddles with jett and yoru whenever they’re sitting down together, he dances around with astra and neon after they make dinner, he shoves kj’s beanie down her head when they’re both stressed and tired, he flips jett’s hood up whenever he runs past and she’s stressed or upset since it makes her laugh, he flicks cyphers hat when they’re heading out on a mission)

skye always makes sure kj and raze go to sleep when she knows they'll be up late

those two care a lot about each other but they both have the unhealthy habit of locking themselves in their labs and messing around with gadgets. they used to have an alarm clock in there that brim got them so they wouldn't be in there for years, but it was destroyed after it scared kj so bad she wrecked her and raze's projects they've been working on for days

because she doesn't want kj and raze's projects to be ruined, skye always goes in quietly, sitting at one of the work stations or on a couch (that appears after several visits from skye, phoenix, jett, and yoru) and not speaking until one of the 2 notices her. she convinces them that they'll get more done/have more time if they sleep now and don't pass out and sleep for 2 days

skye, astra, and yoru talk to each other a lot, more than you would think

astra and yoru first became friends after they talked about their powers, since they both deal with dimensional stuff, yoru and skye became friends because they would both hangout when phoenix, jett, kj, and raze were on missions, practicing their flash aims. yoru introduced the two after he became a lot closer with them

astra and skye are both environmentalists and talk about the better ways they could fight and how to make the base more sustainable, which leads them (and neon and sage, sometimes yoru) to create a garden full of different plants from many people's home countries.

the garden becomes a community effort

kj and raze use spare/partly broken parts to make a sprinkler system

neon, jett, and brim use their plane to go and pick up supplies, since the base isn't really supplied for gardening

astra and skye plan everything out, and with the help of kj and viper, create the perfect place for it to be, close to the kitchen but still with plenty of light

viper modifies her poison walls and orbs to spray out water, which she gives to kj & raze on their sprinkler making journey

phoenix and yoru don't have any powers that help them with the gardening aspect, but phoenix burns away and dying or unnecessary plants in the building area while yoru uses his teleport to move supplies over

they have all the agents make a list of what they want to be grown in the garden. there's a big, ever-changing list in the kitchen that cypher updates when he gets confirmation that they can grow it and someone wants it

the garden ends up being multiple sections, each with its own climate to provide the best-growing environment for certain plants [it ends up being kind of like biosphere 2 if any of you know what that is/has been there]

after they set the garden up, agents can sign up to make food for the Protocol

astra shows phoenix how to make food from her home country

skye and brim have a bbq off

kj and raze swap recipes and meals, when they make them just for themselves

reyna signs up with raze one day and the kitchen somehow doesn’t explode, but they do end up making some fire food

skye/astra will bring the agents who are training/working food that’s comforting but also healthy so they don’t pass out

sage, jett, and neon make food for lunar new year and everyone thinks it’s amazing

all the agents have groups that they’ll train with/hang out after training with (like in warm up)

jett, phoenix, and yoru always train together, no matter who else joins

kj and raze train together a lot too, but raze will also train with reyna sometimes

skye trains with yoru a lot, as well as kj and raze. she’s trained with neon more recently

sage and viper train together a lot, as well as brim. these three train with omen a lot too, and brim with breach

sova trains with anyone who’s in the training room (mostly) but likes to train with phoenix and jett a lot (yoru’s growing on him)

sports are a big thing at the base, especially after phoenix joins (brim kept everything strictly professional before he joined but phoenix wore him down)

brim, neon, phoenix, jett, raze, and KAY/O all like basketball

viper, astra, phoenix, yoru, raze, skye, and reyna all like soccer

brim, KAY/O, and (eventually) breach all like baseball (KAY/O and breach mainly watch it cause brims watching it)

kj watches sports with raze & skye, but not usually on her own

sage, sova, skye, cypher, and kj all like watching non conventional sports like gymnastic, archery, track, etc. (mostly during the olympics)

chamber and omen don’t really watch sports but if it’s on then they’ll watch it

I just love him ur honor

JAWAN (2023) dir. Atlee

Hey Cherry, I love ur blog. Can I request afab!reader giving Miguel a little strip tease? You can add the context, I just want Miggy to watch as his beautiful lady teases him and makes him wait to get the goods. Thank you very much, and have a lovely new year :)

Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x fem!reader

Warnings: 18+, NSFW, Mentions of Nudity, Sexual Touching, Mentions of Fingering

A/N: You just KNOW it's bad if it says happy new years LOL. I hope this year is treating you well, love!

Not Edited

You didn't mean to be a tease.

You were simply doing what you always did after your shower. The only difference is Miguel laying in bed watching you. You had ignored him, walking over to your things on the dresser. Your towel was clutched tight to your body, the outfit you were planning for your night out sitting on a hanger next to your closet. But before you put it on, you went through your routine.

You reach for your bottle of lotion, (something that smelled pleasant but didn't seem worth the money you had spent on the name brand cream), and hit the cap against your palm. Your music could still be heard from the bathroom, and you hummed along to the tune, occasionally whispering the words under your breath as you uncapped the bottle. With slight pressure, the cold lotion gathered in your hand, and you slapped the cap back onto the heel of your palm before setting it on the dresser. You smooth the clump over your hands, getting them evenly coated before bending down. It was slightly awkward as your hair began to fall in your face and you had to press your arms firmly to your sides to keep the towel from falling off.

As you begin to rub the lotion into your skin, a sudden noise from behind you makes you startle. Still in your position, you turn to look over your shoulder. Miguel enters your view instantly, seeing that he pushed his holographic screens that he was working on to the side to get a good view of you. His hand was pressed into the front of his pants, his eyes half lidded as he looks at you. But his eyes aren't trained on your face. No, they're trained to where your towel rides up slightly over your ass from your position, giving him a perfect view of your pussy. He presses his hand harder against himself, his wrist beginning to move in slow rolls.

It makes your cheeks flush, and you call out his name in a chastise. But he pays you no mind as he continues looking, making you hastily straighten up and turn around. Your face is still hot from his actions, but you clear your throat and try to get rid of the lewd image. You pick up your perfume, clearing your through as you begin fiddling with it as you tilt your head back slightly to spray the sweet scent over your skin. The expensive bottle almost slips out of your hands as you feel Miguel's stomach suddenly pressing against your back. Your head tilts further back to look up at him, your eyes meeting his blazing red ones. You begin to open your mouth to question him, but a sharp gasp leaves your lips as his warm palm snakes under your towel and cups the entirety of your cunt.

Your cheeks absolutely burn, your body becoming very aware of his touch and the hardness pressing against you. Miguel presses against you harder, forcing your body to bend down until your chest is pressed down against the dresser. Miguel's body follows, keeping you down as he buries his head into the junction of your neck to smell your signature scent.

"Let me help you rub that in, hermosa," he mutters, his warm breath heating your ear. And you don't even have time to protest when he slips his fingers inside of you and begins to massage your gummy walls.

Looks like you might need another shower after this.

Yo, correct me if I am wrong please, but didn't Hitler rise to power because he promised to fix the German economy and people really liked that so they looked past everything else he was doing??? Like exactly what's happening in America right now???

So many people said they voted for Trump, put a truly evil person in power, because he said he'd fix the economy, and a little voice in my head is going, "Isn't that what happened with fucking Hitler??"

But I've seen no one point that out so maybe I'm miss remembering???????

healing my inner child by binge watching LPS popular and letting me draw furries

guys. please