My Therapist Is Proud Of Me!
TW: mention of suicide attempt
My therapist is proud of me!
This was the first time she explicitly told me how proud she is of me and how far I've come.
While I've had a lot of people tell me that they're proud of me but somehow, hearing this from someone who knows me a lot differently than others, knows all those things that I refuse to share with others, understands my thought process, it just made all the difference.
As she was telling me about the growth I've had, I couldn't hold back the tears.
She told me that I seemed more confident, sure of myself and stronger than ever before. It was really overwhelming.
I'm really glad to have found her and to have come so far. From attempting to take my own life last year to not depending on anyone for my happiness and being content with my life as it is. It's been one hell of a journey and I'm just happy to be alive to experience this.
Never give up, you'll get there eventually.
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I don't want to do this anymore. It fucking hurts so bad. It's not worth it. I'm tired.
You stumble at my doorstep again
with the sly smile and sparkly eyes
that I fell in love with at once
and you pull me close
keep my heart in your warm hands
while you whisper our names together,
oh, how my heart just beats right of your hands.
I love you, with the pieces and mirrors
and blood and tears,
I love you with all my breaths and being.
Time to go underground and push everyone away after an overwhelming weekend.
Fucked and how. I need a vacation. Getting it. Then back to the bullshit which is my life.
As a mentally ill, chronically ill, atheist person I really do wish I believed sometimes. Give me something or someone to blame or bargain with. But I’m just alone in this decaying universe stuck inside a decaying dysfunctional meat suit.
Migraine aura + Splitting/ Spiraling = Fucked
i feel so alone all the goddamn time.
You are just a fragment of my imagination
it feels insulting to cry out loud
when some have loved and lost you
and I've only lost.
