I Just Baked A Cake For My Dad's Birthday Tomorrow

wearing my hair open makes my face look slim but shearing it in a ponytail makes me look morr masculine.... Decisions, decisions, all of them wrong

getting used to the hunger once again (it's literally the best feeling)

3dblr is such a helpful community to have, or I can at least say this for myself.

I've learned so much about harm reduction from some of you, as well as what food i can make/e@t without going above my limit.

I know it's obviously a disorder and all of the other things that could be said as a fact, but also I firmly believe that without community, it would be so much worse. All of the acceptance, unwavering support in recovery when people want that, as well as not forcing anyone to do anything. A lot of people don't get that sort of freedom.

I think back at people who lived before the internet who had an 3d, some like; Karen Carpenter (who died from it), Jane Fonda, Sally Field, and even some of our older family members. I imagine it must've been even more isolating, plus absolutely less support and harm reductive information readily available.

While we aren't lucky, we do have eachother, and all of this other insight gifted to us by eachother. All of this proves to me just how important community and solidarity can be.

Still at my Grandma's... And I fucked up. Usually when I'm here, I either do really well or straight up binge, and it's appears that this time, I do both. Yesterday, I did really well actually but today was horrible. To be fair, no one in my family ate "normally" today, it's the ore-Easter shit, but I mean, they're not disordered, so I feel even more like a faker rn 😭

It's Easter tomorrow and I'm really scared. I'm feeling motivated to do well, but my family wants to go out for lunch tomorrow. I'll just get something from the kids's menu, skip breakfast and only eat a small dinner with my family if I can't avoid it.

And I really have to work on my steps! I feel awful for neglecting them, but I have a really important school project I need to work on... It feels like am excuse, but logically, it really isn't.

I mean, the day after tomorrow my Dad and I will leave already again, and the rest of the fam will stay with my grandma still, andy Dad will leave too after a few days, so my other sister and I will be home alone for a couple days at the end of the holiday s, which is great, since she doesn't really like me and won't force me to eat with her or something. Maybe she'll expect me to cook, because she's prepping for some exams, but that's fine Ig. I mean, I'm kinda planning to fast, but I'll also have to work on that school project, and I'll have to plan my eating depending on how much brain power I'll need then lol. So I have to finish as much of the project as I can now so that I'll be fine fasting/doing high res then.

Bruh why is this post so loong

I may seem cool, but I guarantee you I get no bitches

So

Space is so fucking cool y'all

I had my first strawberries these time of year. They were fucking huge and juicy and so, so red and they reminded me of that huge ass banana I had the other day.

Fruit are so fucking good they're like my candy

(I don't even like that packaged junk anymore, but now when I crave it's oats and yoghurt and honey and - thankfully - fruit, which is still super easy to binge on, even if it's healthier)

this is so fucking true

u ever see fit ppl n wanna recover for a sec then realize u just carry fat unfortunately and if you gain any weight you’ll just be ugly. cuz yeah

The monster cans have got to be at least a quarter of the experience, heck, a third. Have you ever looked at them closely, because man, these designs are just STUNNING.

(Today I some monster into a glass to check it's color like a normal person just does, and drinking from the can in comparison was just. So much better.)

hearing "masculine women are not attractive!!" from cishet men is so stupid. like ok bitch. more for me then.