Oh My God Tho!!!!! Everyone Takes This The Wrong Way Tho!!! The Drama !!! Someone Make A Fic And Tag

Danny having used the same thermos for his ecto vitamins before and figuring it’s fine because he washes it and Tim is pretty liminal at this point. Hell it might even help the guy feel better.

Jason finding traces of lazerous water in the tea: he’s a dead man!

And technically he was right

Danny, working as a cashier: Can I help you?

Tim half-deranged: Please I just want a cup of coffee

Danny squinted, then pulled out a binder: I'm sorry, sir, but you are on the Don't Serve Coffee list. I can offer you some tea instead-

Tim: NO. THIS IS THE FIFTH PLACE. BRUCE CAN'T OWN YOU ALL!

Danny leaning in to whisper: Look, man, I can't give you coffee under the cameras. Meet me in the back alley in twenty minutes and I'll get you a coffee. Bring Cash.

Tim: how much? Five hundred, six hundred or hell even a thousand? I'll bring whatever you want.

Danny: Chill dude, it's a cup of coffee. Three dollars is fine.

Tim: It's not just any coffee! It's my favorite brand and Bruce bought them out just to make sure they wouldn't sell to me anymore!

Danny: okay okay, this coffee means a lot to you. I get it. Twenty minutes alright?

Jason three weeks later in Bat cave: Tim's on drugs! I've caught him trading cash for small containers in a shady alley six times. We need an intervention.

Dick: What?! I thought that was his boyfriend!

Bruce: I also thought that was Tim boyfriend but if it's a drug dealer we have to help him.

Tim hiding in the shadows: shit.

Tim texting Danny: If anyone asks your my secret boyfriend who been making me teas in allies

Danny: who the hell would believe that? But I've had a boring week, so yeah, I'm down to be a pretend boyfriend.

A million times yes

Write this!!!

Tag me!!!!

Danny can be summoned but he has to agree to it, so of course he is fully aware of what the summoners want, how he was summoned and if the area is safe.

So when he is about to get summoned by the justice league for a deal he is about to take it

But then he realizes there are a bunch of blood blossoms and multiple spells to bind/weaken him

So with a bit of help from vortex and a portal he sucks up all the blood blossoms and leaves a single paper behind

The jl is shocked when the summoning not only not works but the flowers - that took ages to acquire - were taken

Slowly Batman approaches the paper and when he touches it a voice rings out

"While I would not mind making a deal with you heros, the way you went about it is horrid. Now, you may summon me again, this time with the knowledge that you shouldn't piss off the being you want help from. If you summon me again with the intent you had before, the infinity realm will take it as a war declaration"

Danny was not aware about the last bit and he is also not aware that the league is now freaking out

Family Discussions

My BFF still can’t get over Balin defending Bilbo.

Thorin: The hobbit.

Balin: His name is Bilbo.

Alright who’s gonna do it? I see a fanfic of Dilfs hitting on Lloyd only for Javier to get jealous!!!

what's funny is that lloyd can be extremely charming and very well liked but only to one demographic and that demographic is old men, he can get them to like him so easily in comparison with literally everyone else that it's just hilarious. grandpas like him. he's a father-in-law magnet. which leads me to believe that if he wanted to he could totally fuck a dilf-

Family Discussions

Scene where Elronds company arrives and surrounds the dwarfs.

BFF: that’s just the medevil equivalent of a motorcycle gang surrounding people and circling them

Ghost Helpline Part 1

Constantine wasn’t upset no no of course not … he was fucking pissed!!!

How on earth was this his life now??? He grabbed as many totems and charms as he could. They were going to need as much luck as they could get their hands on.

-

“Bloody fucking Hell this is by far the worst idea I have ever heard and I want absolutely no part of it!!!”

“John”

“Don’t you John me Z! This is obviously a bad idea!!!”

WonderWoman sighed, “We understand the risks but we are out of options.”

“Pppfff as if we wanted you here in the first place pal”

“Hal!”

“What it’s true if this spell? Summoning? Offering? What ever the hell it’s called didn’t require two magicians we would have just let Zatanna do it!”

“Stop it everyone we cannot be fighting amongst ourselves right now! We have to be ready for anything that happens and whoever decides to help us.” Superman crossed his arms. “Uh question, I get the whole dabbling in magical creatures equal bad but uhhh who or what are we doing exactly?” Wally said offhandedly to Robin(Dick)

“That’s just the thing … we don’t know this Circle is essentially an open invitation to anyone who can help us,” Zatanna sighed “Which means we have to be ready for the worst including whatever it is this creature may want in exchange.” “Oh yeah,” John huffed “Our first born, blood of a virgin, Superman’s soul totally nothing we need to worry about or take to mean We. should. Not. Do. this! !”

Batman ‘cleverly’ choose that moment to walk in, “Alright then start it up.”

Magic is always hard to describe; the colors, and motion like something out a fantasy but this ? This was inexplicable as the candles rose to the ceiling, smoke filled their eyes and the sound of, well -some kind- of animal shook their ears. Then as fast as it came it was gone, as they adjusted to the scene they saw who now occupied the middle of the circle.

Horns

“Bollocks it just had to be a devil.”

Black hair sloppily put into twin buns, held together by … twine???

Superman’s eyebrows creased in slight confusion.

Tan skin painted black in the pattern of an old broken glass on their arms.

Flash stilled next to his nephew.

A scar from a blade ran across one half of their face.

WonderWoman lowered her lasso.

Gold eyes.

Zatanna felt uncomfortable.

There in the circle stood what they would all guess to be a 12 maybe 14 year old???

Batman’s stomach suddenly felt uncomfortable.

“What the ….-“

“Hello Mortals! You have reached the Infinite Realms HelpLine! You may call me Konstelacio! How may I be of assistance?”

Which villain would do this??? I love it it tho!!! Imagine the drama !!!

prompt idea where bad guys kidnap Captain Marvel and put him under a truth serum live on television. JL are desperately searching for Marvel's location while watching, fearing Marvel's livelyhood will be put at stake! but then...

Villain approaches Marvel with a smirk, "Tell me big red cheese, where do you live!"

Captain Marvel, "Oh dude im homeless!"

And literally like the interogation ends as quickly as it started because WHAT

--

villain: "wait so you... where do you sleep...?"

billy: "Outside, nice ol' comfy concrete."

villain: "Dont you have like.. a job?"

billy: "Does heroism count?"

villain: "....No."

the villain doesn't even continue cause he feels bad like damn end of broadcast dude.

Omg these little shits would have so much fun with it too!!

Fanfic writers to your keyboards!!!

Tag me I beg of you XD

Due to a series of general shenanigans, the JL come to believe that Phantom and Captain Marvel are divorced. (This is mostly because Black Adam and Pariah Dark were actually married, but that’s a story for later.) Now, as Captain Marvel is obviously very lonely and glaringly single, they’re trying to get the two back together. These actions have consequences.

Cap: My son wanted to hang out with me! What was i supposed to do ? Say no??

Batman: …

Cap: also my kid did some petty theft from someone who deserved it, what exactly have all your kids been up to?

Batman remembering: … touché

Billy as Captain Marvel just tells Bruce about the littlest robin he met in his road trip

CM: Yeah, he said some stuff about my family… but it was all in good fun!

Batman: Hmmmm

See, Damian had recorded that night in his domino mask camera, but all Bruce knows is that he met 3 kids…

Batman is now itching to find out what happened. Also kinda happy he gets another peice of the puzzle of CM.

Marvel: *doodling*

Batman: *slides into a chair next to him* “Captain.” *nods head*

Marvel: “Mr. Batman Sir.” *nods head back*

*silence*

Marvel: *continues doodling*

Batman: “Do you own a truck, Captain?”

Marvel: “No?”

Batman: “I see. It’s just that I reviewed the footage from a camera I will not disclose the location of—”

Solomon: ‘It was in the little bird’s mask.’

Batman: “— and the people who hit Robin were a few children. Likely joyriding, but upon closer inspection they had food and snacks, as well as souvenirs and little bobbles from what I could see.”

Marvel: *internally starting to panic* “Really?”

Batman:“Yes—”

Marvel: “Wait, you saw him get hit by the truck?”

Batman: “Of course I did. I’m Batman.”

Marvel: “I see…”

Batman: “Anyways, from the footage I reviewed, there were three children. Two boys, one girl, one of the boys looked quite like you. Captain. They were also the only people to run into Robin aside from criminals.”

Marvel: “Okay?”

Batman: “So, I must ask, did you transform yourself into a child and go around the states with a stolen truck?”

Marvel: *just decides to go with it* “…Yes.”

Batman: *stares at him like he’s an idiot for a solid 15 seconds* “I’m not even going to ask why you felt the need to turn yourself into a child. Instead, whose truck did you steal?”

Marvel: “I don’t even remember.”

Batman: “How?”

Marvel: “It was Junior’s idea.”

Batman: “Why are you blaming an actual child for your decisions?”

Marvel: “Because he’s the one that suggested I make that decision? I mean, he was the one that proposed the entire trip in the first place.”

Bruce didn’t know how to feel about a “grown man” blaming a child for something like this.

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DC-Verse Theater part 3

“Alrighty next clip is a sibling universe of this universe so again most things are the same as yours with some slight differences.” Damian

Reacting to the DC- Verse

DC-Verse Theater

A Theater appeared in front of more than a dozen heroes. They were seemingly teleported in the middle of the day, none of their phones worked past the camera and the bats were slowly starting to tear the building apart. All of the doors were locked and none of them could open them, even with kryptonian strength.

The most concerning part was that they were all dressed as civilians.

Everyone in the room; Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, GL Hal, Green Arrow, Flash Barry, Aquaman, Dick, Jason, Tim, Stephanie, Cassandra, Damian, Duke, Barbra, Wally, Roy, Jon, Konner and Bart.

“Well we might as well raid the concession stand,” Wally could hear the other heroes eyes roll and can’t find it in him to care. Impulse beats him to the popcorn maker and screams as he opens the cabinet.

“Bart!” There on the floor hair tangled on the edge of door of the cabinet splayed out was a girl. She wasn’t breathing. “What the fuck what the absolute fuck.” Wally had seen plenty of horrible things in his job both of them but this entire situation unsettled him completely. “Barry I think you need to see this.”

The heroes knew better to crowed a body and allowed Barry and Batman to pass freely… they still stared tho. She looked short, half of her body still stuffed into the drawer making it hard to tell. Barry reached out and flipped her over. He need to check if maybe just maybe she was breathing. Flash stopped at his colleges intake of breath. Face up everyone could see a stained patch of her black hair was white.

Jason cussed up a storm.

Before Barry could begin touch her, the body arched up and gasped loudly.

“Holy shit back up man.”

Oh she was a live. That some how left the group with more questions.

She contorted, pulling her body out of the space. She looked …normal. Short, black hair, black eyes, tawny skin scarred. She stood up and stretched.

Clark blanched, “She’s breathing.” They got a few looks, “She definitely wasn’t breathing before.”

Jason couldn’t take it, “What are you?”

She stopped mid stretch, and shrugged, “I’m a chimera.” Her grin was all teeth.

“Well then let’s get this over with.”

“Get what over with, do you perhaps know why we are here miss -?” Journalist powers go!

“Well to watch the multiverse of course! Or at least that what I assume my boss wants me to do, can’t really think of another reason you lot would be here.”

“The multiverse? What’s that…” Clark asked.

The girl stopped and stared at him, “Tugh, you can all drop the act. I know who all of you are.”

“I don’t know-“

She pointed them out, “Superman, Batman, Green Lantern, yadda yadda yadda. Come on the faster we do this the faster you get sent home.”

The heroes started spewing outrage.

Diana spoke directly to her first tho, “Who are you? What is your bosses plan?”

The raven haired girl walked up to a seat and sat down, “Like I said I’m Chimera, and my boss probably wants me to show you guys the multiverse so you guys can I dunno learn a lesson or become stronger or some bull crap like that.”

Diana nodded, “And you have that ability? The ability to just see these things?”

“ I’d be a pretty bad Watcher if I didn’t!”

“Watcher?”

“Yup it’s like my title and rank, the infinite cosmos to watch and no one to share it with. “

Diana was growing concerned sure the girl knew things she shouldn’t but-

“So no worries about me spilling any secret identities, I’m entirely constrained to this dimension.” Her voice got softer annoyed, “Trust me I’ve tried.”

Diana really didn’t like the way that sounded.

“Oh and don’t worry about your world catching on fire without you it’s on pause till you get back.” The girl said flipping the screen on her phone, that presumably worked.

The heroes all looked around at each other, were they really doing this?

Roy was done, “As intriguing as this all is what if I don’t want to? Time being paused or not I have a baby at home to feed.”

She kept on scrolling, “Funny you say that as if we have a choice.”

“We?” Diana shared a look with Clark, she really wasn’t liking how this all sounded. Did they need to save this girl?

“Yup,” she made a popping sound on the ‘p’, “We, what part of this being my job do you not understand ?”

Diana didn’t have a response ready for that.

Jon floated over to the girl and sat down in the seat next to her, ignoring his dads whispers (and Damian’s yells) not to approach.

“What are you doing?”

“Looking at our options.”

-

Note: Feel free to send me anything you’d like them to react to!!!