Things I Wish My Body Would Do:

Hello world!!

Hello!! I hope to make a lot of friends on this blog and make memories worth sharing.

A little about me:

I'm an old soul, I cherish the little things and believe to be true to one's self. I love and care about everyone, must be why I get hurt easy and a lot. Everything to me is black and white. I am very passionate about motorcycles and art. I love science and health related things, and soon to be double majoring in Biology and Paleontology to attend medical school. I've only had 2 art classes my whole life, other than that I taught myself. I hope to get to know people on here and have a few tumblr best friends.

Much love~

Anuk❤

Am I ill?

Sometimes I start to wonder if I really am chronically ill. Do I really wake up every day with pain or am I just faking it all the time? I know other people actually have these issues and they are very much real, but to me, I don't know what is real for myself anymore. I try so hard to be normal, yet the pain comes back. It always will come back. I wake in the mornings with a killing pain surging through my jaw. I know that last night I must have been fighting monsters, swinging swords that allow me to defeat these dragons lingering in the mountains. Yet, today as I wake up the pain isn't from a dragon or those monsters I fought, it's from my trying to dislocate once more. The throbbing pain in my head isn't from being flung against the wall of a dragon's den, that pain is from my chronic migraines that linger in me causing it almost impossible to eat and hold my food down. That surging sensation that spirals in my belly, drifting up towards my heart and seeping through my veins isn't the poison of my enemy trying to defeat me at last, this is the anxiety that causes me to isolate myself until everything is fine again. The anxiety that holds me back from chasing these wild imaginations because I'm not okay. I don't think I ever will be okay, but am I really ill?

Why is this so true?! I just look at someone and I’m like “Yep, you got the ‘tism my broski...”

allistic people are like "omg i had no idea you were autistic" meanwhile other autistics can sniff each other out a mile away

autistic person entering a public building: (touches ground) one of my people was here.....

Neurotypicals take drugs to experience everyday shit for neurodivergent people like “Bro I was so high I had to turn my tv down to taste my pizza” yeah that’s a Tuesday night for me

"Everyone's a little bit autistic"

Some people have cancer, which is abnormal cell growth.

Everyone has freckles/moles/skin-tags/etc, which are also abnormal cell growth.

So does "everyone have a little bit of cancer"?

Or does that detract from the very real struggles of people who actually have cancer?

I actually used my AAC in public today for the first time. I know this might not sound like much to some people, but when I have speaking issues and end up nonverbal or having a verbal communication issue (I don’t know what to call it without people getting mad at me) I normally just stop talking all together and isolate myself. This AAC really helped me so much today and I don’t feel so drained physically and mentally from work. I’m really happy so now I don’t have to go home and sleep the rest of my afternoon away, I can play a game or read!!

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Also, I don’t know what you’d call it that I have. I was nonverbal for well over 7 years and have on and off verbal issues where I can talk some days but most days I’m completely silent. Recently I’m having an episode that’s seeming to last about 4 days.

Disablity aids are super cool.

You, and your aids look awesome, pretty/handsome/pleasant, and super rad.

I often feel embarrassed for wearing ear defenders, or for having a tablet harnessed around me but like?? That isnt what it is!! It is a disability aid. It is an AAC device. It is how I communicate, and there is no reason to he embarrassed by that.

one day you think: I want to die. and then you think, very quietly: actually. actually. I think I want a coffee. a nap. a sandwich. a book. and I want to die turns day by day into want to go home, I want to walk in the woods, I want to see my friend, I want to sit in the sun, I want a cleaner kitchen, I want a better job, I want to live somewhere else. I want to live.

- via duckbunny

chest over knees gotta be the best position to stop the cramps

So, are you "chronically late" neurodivergent OR "overcompensates for the fact that I have no concept of time by being ridiculously early" neurodivergent?