This May Be Pretty Weird And Really Minimal But I Really Appreciate How Light On Me Doesn't Make Fun

“when I saw you on that picture, all the memories of our childhood came back”

Sex doesn’t make us whole.

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL ASEXUALITY DAY!

A small Bad Buddy meta

After much reading and rewatching I just had to say...

We see pat use the four signs on ink and then see pa use it too. What stood out for me was that while they thought they were using it to test the other person's feelings, they were unwittingly using it on themselves. And we see the dichotomy so clearly, because pa confirms her own feelings in the process while pat doesn't respond to those signs himself. I've seen a lot of y'all say how he wasn't too disappointed when ink didn't react but note he didn't react either and he must have realised that. That the feelings he once felt weren't exactly the same and we see him wonder a bit as to what changed.

He's contemplating this when he's at the instrument shop and pran arrives and automatically realises. Here we see him use the signs not on pran but on himself! It just shows how he understood that the signs are better when used on oneself because only you truly know how you feel about someone, whereas the other person may not openly react to your signs. And this is proven by how pran nor ink reacted when the signs were used because they were both repressing and hiding their crushes, obviously they are not going to let on that they have feelings, they were anyway finding it difficult to do so(pran in the hallway when pat gives him his guitar...his face was such a giveaway and ink at the restaurant with pa ..again her face after pa helped her with the dirt in her eye was telling)..so both have their guards up.

So here pat notices how he himself reacts to pran in the context of how their relationship has been going and it sort of falls into place. It explains not just his behaviour but also pran. Because pran could easily cut him off and not associate at all with him, he could have moved out of the form if he actually wanted to..the only reason he is staying then and keeping up their secret association must be because of something pat is just coming to put his finger on. Its here he realises that they shouldn't even be friends with the way their families work and now he questions..what exactly are they? And we see that so beautifully communicated at the end of the episode on the rooftop.

Coming back to pat noticing him response to the four signs...he notices his feelings now and the only reason he hasn't so far was because he probably didn't think it was possible.....for him to like also like boys and for that boy to be pran. But that's why we get the flashbacks and all the things they went through in high school to show that pat always did like pran but he never got a chance to explore those feelings and because he never expected them. What is so amazing and one of the highlights of this show, is that he doesn't for one moment grudge himself his feelings. He doesn't beat himself up or question it, he accepts that sexuality is fluid and understands that he can like whoever he wants. This says so much about his character and it was at this point at which we all fell for pat (cause by then we were all already gone for pran) and it was after this that the "walking green flag" posts started showing. The way in which they portrayed Pat's character arc was so true to a realistic experience of understanding fluid sexuality, I cannot stop applauding.

Should I walk you to your faculty first?

No. It’s your building here. Go to class.

Okay. bye.

Light On Me, Ep. 16: Can I Walk You Home?

You’re the only one I want

EXPERIENCE THIS GLORIOUS SCENE WITH ME.

bad buddy really did go farther than i ever expected.

like okay, my initial reaction was that it seemed like a fun dynamic, and a fun story. and it is! but i didn't expect much more than that. tbh, when i figured out pran already had feelings for pat so early on in the show, i thought it'd be a story where they slowly became friends, then made the bet, and pat would slowly realize he had feelings for pran too, and they would both hide behind the bet and secretly hope the other would fall for them until some kind of confession. i didn't even really think about how it might end. either in some "love will save the day" cheesy way or a sad ending tbh. i thought that IF there was A kiss, it MIGHT be in the last episode, and might be awkward and stiff, like they so often are in this genre. and i was fine to go along with it because i was laughing so hard, and impressed by the acting, and was enjoying the story anyway.

and then episode 5 happened and blew all of those assumptions into the water.

i still haven't recovered tbh. i can't believe we've gotten all of this. such a well rounded story with well rounded characters, with chemistry like i've never seen, and intimacy treated as normal things. small acts and domestic details that show love like normal people, like real people. a parent storyline that didn't depend on heightened drama or the expected "they used to date" trope, but instead was a story about betrayal of friendships. it felt real and made every piece of the puzzle fit together in ways that make it so you can dig more meaning out of the whole series than you could at the start. the way everything ties to the title, enough so that people were making jokes every week about who the real "bad buddy" was all along.

we got lovely, supportive friendships between wlw and mlm. we got a wlw relationship on the side, with a well fleshed out story and characters to root for. it wasn't tossed in at the end, it was built up and it was beautiful. we got discussions of sexuality. discussions of stereotypes. and the friends in this show, whether or not you like them, are not cookie cutter perfect, or perfectly boring, people, but all add their own spark to each dynamic. they feel like real people with their own feelings and choices and better yet they are feelings we as an audience can still understand, regardless of screentime or if we like their actions. other side characters like uncle tong and junior, and even their old high school teacher, felt like real people as well, with their own lives and agendas. the ones that came into closer contact with the plot didn't push their stories onto the main characters, but rather gave them the tools they needed to build their own. such is life. it was...very human!

no characters "shipped" the mc's to their face. no fetishization was thrown in on screen for us to be forced to watch, as i have so often seen before in this genre. nothing was treated as extraordinary, which of course is what made it so. there were no gender roles the characters fell into, neither was more masculine or feminine than the other, and neither was more dominant than the other. its a relationship of equals, shown in both big and miniscule ways, and it's a relationship between two men! on that note - there was no homophobia!!! at all! not once did someone have an adverse reaction to the idea of same sex relationships, from their parents, to their friends, to the theater group, to strangers at the beach. no one batted an eye. and yet the metaphors for it were sewn in everywhere you looked. it was refreshing to see a show that tipped into similar stakes, without it actually becoming a consequence on top of everything else.

the ending itself was a metaphor. the glass closet pat and pran kept their relationship in was a homage to queer people everywhere living their truth despite the world or people around them trying not to allow it. they lived their lives on their terms, told the people they wanted to tell, had that support group, made memories with the people they could be themselves around, and didn't let their parents take that from them. they held their happiness between their fists and didn't let go, and slowly their environment changed to suit them, rather than the other way around. it was a realistic ending. it wasn't a perfect ending, where they got this perfect life and everything worked out instantly, but things don't have to be perfect to still be happy, and sooooo full of love, and to show that hope for the future?? im in awe.

okay and the pacing of this series was so excellent. only 12, 1-hour-long episodes, and a complete story with a hopeful ending? that alone is noteworthy to me. conflicts and storylines rose and were solved within the same episode or the next. every ep was a step further in the characters' individual growth as well as their relationships. nothing felt like it was there for no reason, despite literally being a slice of life show. everything served its purpose!

and my last big point is that this really is, at its core, a gay story told for gay people by gay people. p'aof knew exactly what he was doing with this series, everything was very intentional, and i'm forever grateful to him and the crew and the cast for the amount of love and hard work they put into this. i'm going to miss the soonvijarn recaps so much too, it was incredibly healing to watch a group of older gay men react to this show every week and then discuss it with the director afterwards like that was just so rewarding, not to mention gave me so many laughs. like i can't find a way that expresses my gratitude enough for the people that made this show a reality.

this is becoming an extremely long ramble but truly? and ive said this before, but, i thought this would be a show where two people who hated each other learned to love each other. instead i got a story about love that already existed, and trust that was grown.

everything about this show felt warm and comfortable and real. rewatching it still makes me feel everything i felt the first time. my heart still races, i laugh just as hard, and i still cry. it really has been such unexpected fun and all i can say now is that i know it's going to be a part of me for a very, very long time. and that i'm grateful for it, and all that it did.

can i respond to your request again? no, it’s already over so you can’t. 

good morning gays (x)