Silence Is Better Together IV

SAY YOU WILL — shoot

cw. suggestive (18+). situationship. simon x f!reader. this ones a bit more fluffy heh...

#02 seconds | masterlist | #04

“Want some?”

Simon pulls his face back as you point the massive wheel of candyfloss towards him. It’s bigger than your face—in fact it’s bigger than his own—and he’s in a small state of disbelief that you actually spent eight quid for it. He thinks of the taste: sickeningly sweet, a bomb of rainbows and fairy tales, a touch of nostalgia.

“I’m good, thanks.” He smiles anyways, watching your tongue swirl around the sticky fluff. 

“Suit yourself.”

Your intertwined hands keep him tethered to you amidst the crowds. It’s the third date—if he could even call it that. The dynamic established after that morning is something he’s content with but hasn’t gotten his head around yet. Whatever this is between you and him is transactional. You need a good fuck, to feel needed, and he’s still testing the waters of relationships as he figures out what he’s doing with his life. 

Even though there’s no romantic involvement there, Simon can see that there is some kind of friendship blooming. One that he doesn’t resent. He didn’t realise how refreshing it is to know someone who’s blissfully unaware of his work and what he does; what it’s like talking to someone who isn’t riddled with the thought of wars and conflict.

But he’s still restless. The skin around his nails runs red when he’s alone with himself for too long. It’s difficult to work out how much is acceptable in this dynamic. Time from work is sweet but brief, and it still tags alongside him even when he’s not there. What would you say if you found out about the violent dreams? What would you do if you knew what he’s done? The blood he’s shed. The people he’s lost.

He tries not to feed into these anxieties. He rationalises that you probably won’t stick around long enough to see what lies underneath his skin, to find out the truth. Once the next mission comes, you’ll be alone and you’ll move on from him and find someone who can be there when you need it. It’ll be a mutual understanding and then he will look for someone else to start trying for something real. Yet–

Simon can’t stop staring at you.

He’s enraptured. Hypnotized. The blinking fair lights in all their blues and reds and pinks and yellows flicker over your face in a way that leaves him short of thought. Each flash, each colour, reveals another part of your face that he hadn’t noticed before, hidden from the naked lights.

The way your jaw hinges as your lips capture the stringy sugar; the crinkle of your nose when the mountain of it touches your face. Simple things that shouldn’t have him so stunned, things which shouldn’t have his chest growing tight and his jeans feeling tighter.

“Oh my god!” You squeal and it catches Simon by surprise, eyes instinctively sharpening, this breath growing shallower—sinking himself into stealth and awareness. There’s nothing in the crowd that would give away an event, a problem, but he surveys the space around him anyways.

You point the stick from your candy to the side, not too far ahead, and Simon tries to notice what it is–

“Look at that bear!”

Hung above a stall, amidst other toys and stuffies Simon sees it—flourescent like a highlighter, a pink and human-sized teddy. The relief he feels is immediately, his shoulders relaxing back down into low slopes, heart rate steadying, and then: “Seriously?”

You laugh at him, already dragging him towards the game. “It’s so big and fluffy. I need it.”

Simon rolls his eyes, scoffs. “Where are you even going to keep it?”

Face turning back towards him, your eyes narrow as though trying to look menacing or peeved at him, but your smirk still curls your lip—mischievous in ways that Simon slightly fears. 

“In my bed…obviously.”

It’s just his luck that of all the games there could be at this fair, the one with the bear that you need happens to be a shooting one. There’s shotguns set up on a wall, crosses on the floor and target papers hung at the back. He finds it amusing, how battered and bruised the wood handles are, how the game master (who looks hardly eighteen) chews his gum and makes short comments to the people playing.

You need three bullseyes to win.

“Easy enough,” you shrug, and then you move onto the X on the floor while the guy sets up the game for you. The concentration on your face while everything is explained to you is endearing, watching from just beside you a crease forms between your brows.

You tuck the gun against your shoulder and smirk. “You better watch this, Simon,” you humour. “I’m getting that bear.”

He huffs, twirls the stick of candyfloss you’d passed over to him between his fingers. “Sure, love.”

Unsurprisingly, on your first turn you miss all three times, none of them aimed even close enough to be considered. You scowl at the papers hung at the back of the stall, trying to refocus yourself as you have another go, a puff of air on your lips as you straighten your spine far too much, firing off the bullets. This time is better, you manage to actually hit the target but–

“You’re too tense,” he says while taking a step closer, his chest nearly flush with your back. 

“I’m not.”

“You are,” his hand moves between your shoulder blades and he presses there. “Relax your shoulders.”

“Like this?”

Simon guides you into the right stance, arms over yours, a finger ghosting over your own on the trigger. He can feel your breath against him, the heat of your body through his clothes. It’s intoxicating and nerving all at once, but his body doesn’t twitch like it should. Here he’s perfectly calm, his chin ghosting over the top of your head, time slowed.

“Now?”

“Now.”

Two of them shoot straight through the middle, your gasp of excitement electrifying. His praises fly off the tongue easily, a laugh rumbling in his chest. The last bullet just kisses the circle, and you’re beaming, head tipped backward so you can see him, your eyes glowing something wild and precious.

Everything goes blank then, the rest of the world drowned for a few small moments. Relief. Bliss. Content. It bleeds into one big blur until you’re nudging him, bringing him back to his senses.

The bear is more like a mammoth.

Its appearance, very (hardly) bear-like, is almost your own height and stuffed to the brim, heavier than you expected. But even in all its greatness, you lug it all the way home—not without handing it off to him halfway back.

He comes out of the bathroom, tipsy after the beers you’d shared, to find you in the bedroom, cuddling the thing while you scroll on your phone. It’s tucked between your head and shoulder, a leg curled over the middle of it, and Simon finds himself eyeing it with a malice which shouldn’t exist.

Because it’s just a stupid teddy.

“Jealous?” Your voice is rich with mirth, eyebrow quirking as you give him a once over. He’s in his boxers, and when you bite your lip Simon knows how the evening will end.

“Of a toy?” He scoffs, crawling into the bed next to you. “Don’t need t’a be.”

“Now don’t be so sure too soon,” you prop yourself up on an elbow. “There’s not enough space in this bed for you too–”

Your laughter is all Simon hears when he rolls you onto your back, yanking the bear out of your grasp and tossing it into a corner of the room he’s unconcerned about. Protests come swiftly but just as so he presses his mouth onto yours, swallowing every noise as he kisses you with an open mouth.

He doesn’t stop until you go pliant, until you stop squirming in retaliation underneath him—melting under him as he straddles you.

You’re a flushed mess when he pulls away, lips wet and breaths shallow as you cross your arms over his neck so he doesn’t go too far.

“Simon–”

“Don’t need that bear, love.” His fingers curl at your jaw, thumb ghosting over the flesh of your bottom lip. “Got one right ‘ere already.”

bleeding blue | apocalypse au

part thirty-five —other parts

pairing: Simon “Ghost” Riley x fem!reader words: 5.8k tags: death. blood and gore. zombies of course. AFAB reader. single dad ghost. enemies to lovers. menstruation. harm to a child. summary: After losing your companions, you run into a skull-masked man and his daughter. They are your last hope for survival.

Jagged rock burns into your palms. Slapping a hand up, you feel for the grassy ledge, barely visible in the darkness. You heft the backpack over it before managing to pull yourself up, landing on your stomach with a grunt through your teeth. The sneakers you scavenged from the closet are tight around your toes—better than Salome's thin shoes, but still far from pleasing as you stand and press on towards the road.

Moonlight guides you north. 

Not long until sunrise, judging by the sky.

Small white clouds puff around your mouth as the chilled air brushes the damp spot on your too-big jeans, the cuffs rolled and the waist cinched to keep them from slipping. You couldn't leave in the middle of the night, so you held a mug of water as a makeshift alarm. The moment sleep tried to steal you, the splash on your thigh ended it abruptly. 

You'd woken Blue up to tell her. At first, grey eyes scolded you in the dark. She looked away, ready to argue, before quietly reciting instead: the house they kept her in, the layout, any hiding places she may have seen.

"What about her?" you had asked. "Anything important to her. She probably saw antibiotics as a gift from God or something."

"Yeah. She would've," Blue muttered. "She liked to knit. And, um, talked about birds. Her husband owned the whole place, but he died. I don't know if any of that helps."

"It does. It's better than nothing." You gave her hand a squeeze. "Make sure he eats again. And check his back. You might need to drain it. You know how now, right? Nereida could—"

"I've got it." She slipped her hand away. "Just—don't do anything stupid, okay?"

"Of course not."

Sneaking out had been easy—only because Nereida was on watch. You slipped out the back and wove through the tall grass, barely stirring the stalks. Price would've caught you for sure. But you made it across the creek with nothing more than the slow unrolling of your jeans to slow you down, the cuffs dragging in the water and soaking through. You rolled them back up, but a kilometer up the road, they've slouched back down, heavy and clinging to your legs.

Time is an enemy you've already lost a day to. With a sigh, you drop onto the hood of a rusted car, pull the knife from your waist, and hack at the fabric’s ends. A serrated blade would make this easier. The hems are jagged, but at least they won’t get in the way.

Ghost’s fever is bad, but the real threat is sepsis—the blood poisoning, organ failure, the things you haven’t told Blue. At best, he has a week. At worst, another day. The thought has you scrubbing a hand over your tired eyes before pushing off the car. You toss the cut scraps into the grass just as a disturbance prickles the back of your neck.

You whirl around, dropping the knife in favor of the pistol. 

"Just me."

"Jesus. Kyle. I was ready to shoot."

"Honorable of you to give me a quick one."

You huff, bend for the knife, and slip it back at your waist.

He closes the gap, rifle and backpack slung over his shoulders. 

"Why wouldn't you tell anyone?" His brows lower. "I went to feed him, and Blue said you’d gone back. Hell of a surprise."

You give him your back. "I've already wasted time. I knew what you'd say."

"And what exactly did you think I'd say?" A hand on your shoulders pries you back around.

Your eyes drift up to his, narrow, then veer to the side. "That it's a long shot."

"Yeah, it is." His hand drops. He brushes past you with a sigh, long and ragged, adjusting the rifle on his back. "Come on, then. You're not the only one who gives a shit about him."

There isn't anything to be said as you trudge beside him, no argument able to form. You know his company is invaluable. Gratitude is still hard to find, even when he prevents you from going the wrong way. "We turned here last time." Apparently you hadn't paid much mind. The road fills the gaps of silence, dawn breathing life into the buzz of cicadas. Long drags of air fill your lungs: sweet flowers only, until, something else. A waft of charred meat.

"You should eat."

Kyle extends a piece of squirrel. Despite the twinge in your stomach, you brush him off. "While they were starving you, we were getting stuffed. Fatten the mares, get a strong foal—all that."

His jaw ticks. "Ah."

"Damn good food, too."

"Lucky you."

"Lucky us."

Conversation shrinks to a brief exchange of what Blue said. He doesn't look convinced it'll help much. The stench doesn’t sour the air until the first sign for Fleurbaix rises at your right—like a breath in your face. Humidity clings to it, thick and unmoving, until there’s nothing else to breathe. In the sunlight, familiar stone walls and red-shingled rooftops repulse you, almost more than the sight of aimless Greys—some weaving between clotheslines, most trapped within the fenced pasture. The cows, however, have already fled through a broken gap, eager to escape uphill.

"They should've lost interest by now. The blood isn't fresh," you mutter.

"Humidity. Less evaporation, more smell." He nods the tip of his rifle. "Over there. That one has a wraparound porch like Blue said."

The view vanishes behind overgrown trees as you crest a hill, descending toward the commune. Kyle motions you forward, weaving through structures, keeping clear of the Greys. As long as they can’t scent you, they will stay distracted. You step over a few stray bodies, faces picked apart by crows that scatter at your approach. Clinging to a stone wall as you follow, a bony hand bursts forth from a window—Kyle knifes its skull before it can grab you.

Other than that, there aren't any close calls.

You reach the house that fits Blue's description.

The door is wide open.

Kyle sweeps in with the poised rifle.

You are greeted by an already ransacked interior. Tipped chairs, half-yanked cabinets, tossed couch cushions. A sick understanding settles at your fingertips, curling them around the gun. 

"They were here. The women. They knew she would've hidden them."

More signs that this is just a dead end; a waste of precious time.  

Kyle lowers the guns and presses forward into the hall. "That doesn't mean they found what they were looking for. Check the rooms."

Maman's house is as expected, even in disarray. Quiet and balmy. You kick open the first door. Polished wood, gold-embellished hinges, a closet stuffed with white gowns. A knitting bag catches your eye. You sift through it, tossing out balls of red yarn. Nothing.

More nothing under the bed. 

You tear the painting from the wall, only solid stone behind it.

A family photo thrashes to the floor beneath a swipe of your fist. You find Kyle in the other room, where a smaller bed is tucked beneath a window—the sight makes it hard to breathe for a moment. The blood stain on the sheets. Somehow you know whose it is. Your stomach rips at itself. You force yourself to look away before you lose it. 

"The floorboards. They didn't look under them. Help me."

He raps the butt of the rifle against the wood. A hollow echo near the doorway offers promise. A knife jammed between the planks pries them apart. When you sink to your knees, all that fills your hands are stashes of faded euros. No pills, no vials. 

You rip up the notes and let the shreds feather through the air, leaning back on your palms as a quiet hiss leaves your teeth. "Where did you put them you vile, ugly, goddamn hag."

"Maybe her son kept them," Kyle murmurs, threading a hand through his hair. "He had the guns."

"No." Your voice is firm. You stand and pace. "She would've wanted them close to her. Antibiotics—she was saving that for the women. The births."

You reach for your knife and stab the mattress, slicing it open. Springs and foam. Books maybe. You run back to the shelf in the hall and rip them one at a time, flipping them open to see if any were hollowed out. Even the Bible is just a book. 

What else?

What else?

"How much time are we willing to spend looking for them, Twix?" he asks lowly behind you. "Maybe we check somewhere else. A town."

"They'd have picked them clean years ago." You toss the Bible to the floor with a thud. "This was our best bet. We had them. We fucking had them."

"And now we don’t. We can’t keep tearing this place apart. We focus on keeping him stable—keep the wounds clean, use what we’ve got. He’s made it this far without them. We just need to buy him more time. There might be another stash in one of the other houses."

You lean against the wall, eyes fluttering shut briefly. A deep inhale. "There's just—something I'm missing."

"Twix—" He sighs, running a hand down his face. "Alright. Let's do another sweep. I'll check the floors in the living room."

Thoughts race. A frothy tide refusing to settle. You press your thumb to the scabbed cut on your wrist, the sting sharpening your mind. Back in the cell. Morning sun slanting through the window. Obsessively studying what’s around you. Replaying everything you learned about that woman. A dead woman. If you could’ve told the Greys to hold off, let her speak before they tore through her neck, you would have.

In the midst, a dove’s call breaks through—three notes, too close in your ear. You must be imagining it, but Alexandre’s voice stirs in your head: La tourterelle chante pour toi.

He said that when he heard the dove.

Why?

Birds.

She talked about birds.

You push off the wall and follow the sound to the room where they kept Blue. The coo draws you to the windowsill by the bed, where the glass is cracked just enough for the curtains to stir, the stench outside seeping in. Twin beady eyes snap to yours, a mechanical tilt of its neck. A collared dove, you think. Paul used to rise early to listen to them.

"Where are they?" you press lowly, accusing. "You know, don't you?"

The bird doesn’t answer, only flutters down from the sill.

Your fingers grip the edge of the window as you kneel on the ruined mattress. Below, the bird perches in the flower box—no flowers, just dried weeds and a nest of twigs.

"Tell me." It watches the whisper curl from your lips. "Tell me, or I’ll rip apart your home."

It flutters off. Your arm lunges after it, clawing at the nest in blind retaliation. Twigs snap. Dirt kicks up into your eyes. You blink hard to clear it. A strangled sound catches in your throat—half a curse, half a cry. Then, something strange beneath. Sharp rust that makes you freeze.

You sweep debris off the top of a—a lock box—loosely buried within the soil. A breath lodges in your throat as you claw at the dirt, dragging the rusted metal loose, launching backward on the bed with it clutched in both hands. It can't be real. You give the box a sharp shake. Something rattles inside, and your chest tightens.

"Kyle!"

Thunderous slaps of his boots echo down the hall. He rushes in, scanning you with a sweep of his gaze.

"No, I'm—this is locked." You tug at the bolted metal. "Can you open it?" 

He doesn't question it. Relief flickers across his face, quickly replaced by grim determination. He raises the rifle and slams the butt against the lock. A sharp clang echoes, metal chipping but holding. Exhaling through his nose, he adjusts his grip. You meet his eyes and nod—keep going.

He hammers at the lock, pausing only to yank at it, testing for weakness. You wipe dirt from your jeans, watching. Whatever she buried here—it mattered. It had to. A dove lands on the windowsill, but movement beyond it sends your pulse spiking above the sharp cut of metal.

Greys.

When did they—

"Shit, shit, shit." You lurch from the bed. 

He stops, yanking up the rifle to jut it toward the window, shooting a snarling one that clambers up on the porch. It flails back, revealing more alike behind it—many more—shambling out from wherever they'd been lingering. "Fuck—how!" He tucks the lock box under his armpit and grabs your wrist. "Come on."

The living room windows reveal just how many have begun to close in around the house. Faster ones are already at the front door, clawing at the wood. Kyle swears, yanking you toward the bathroom—higher ground, a window above the porcelain tub. He slams it open with the rifle, then hands instantly find your waist to lift you. You shed the backpack, pulling it through behind your feet to squeeze through blindly.

"Anything to climb?" he barks.

You look up. "A gutter!"

You grab it and tighten your core, hoisting yourself up as your sneakers scrape against the siding, the moans below growing louder as they round the corner of the porch. Your palms press into exposed rafters, the gutter serving as a shaky foothold, but the last push onto the roof eludes you.

A firm shove at your thighs sends you over. You scramble up, steadying yourself before glancing back.

Kyle is halfway up, rappelling fast—until a bony hand clamps around his ankle, yanking him downward. Disoriented from the rush, you slap for the gun at your waist, firing wildly—two bullets wasted before one lands, shattering the Grey's skull with a squeal.

He throws the lockbox. You catch it just as he hauls himself onto the shingles.

Your head reels as you watch Kyle drop to one knee and start picking them off. Four, maybe five drop with ease, but the rest move erratically—jolting, frantic. He slows, trying to track their unpredictable movements, each shot requiring more precision. If you had your bow, you could help. But the pistol? You don't trust yourself.

He grunts in frustration, adjusts his stance, then reloads as he circles the perimeter of the roof. That’s when you feel it—not a hunger pang, but a deep, familiar ache, piercing low in your gut. Then something wet. Warm. A slow gush down your leg. Your breath stutters as you glance down at the stain blooming red across your thigh.

"It's me," you say.

"What?"

"Fuck, it's me they smell. My period."

His gaze drops to your body, widening when he sees the evidence. You should feel exposed, but you don’t. The thought slams into your brain at the same time your hands move—unbuttoning, yanking at the fly. The moans below swell.

"We can use it. Look away."

His eyes snap back to yours, then dart away with a sharp exhale. "Christ."

You’re already shoving them down, tugging at the loose, borrowed underwear clinging to your hips. Gathering the fabric, you swipe at the blood slick on your thigh, pressing it deeper into the fabric. "It can buy us time—but not much."

You yank the jeans back up. You roll the underwear into a ball. Kyle looks over.

"There—throw it toward that house. The door’s open. If enough go inside, it might trap some. Then we run back to the hill."

Just as quickly as the plan is formed, you hurl back your arm and launch the decoy as hard as you can. It lands in front of the next house, far enough to release the breath caged in your lungs as heads snap toward it, bodies lurching away. Kyle slings the rifle over his shoulder, grips your waist, and helps you down—but the moment he lets go to steady himself, your foot slips on the gutter.

You land roughly on your side and lose hold of the lockbox. All of the breath leaves your body as you scramble to grab it. A strong hand beneath your armpit tugs you back up, and then you're sprinting. A quick glance back shows most are drawn away, but a few still trail you. Kyle snatches the handgun from your waist mid-stride and fires, dropping two before they get too close.

You duck beneath clotheslines, weave through wash bins still brimming with water. Trample roses. The pulse pounding in your neck drowns out everything but the next shot Kyle fires—enough to throw off your step. You don’t see the one lunging until it slams into you from the side.

You feel the jolt of the fall before you fully register the thing wrestling on top of you. Hair whips into your mouth, rancid breath spilling hot across your cheek. The strength is wrong—too fresh, too human. The hands grabbing at you are still strangely soft. A distinct bulge presses you down. Then a glob of dark-tinged saliva splats onto your eye, blinding you before you can make sense of it.

It's only a second of fight before a shot to the skull sends pulpy blood and brain onto your face. 

The weight is torn away as you scrub at your eyes. Part of you already knows before you look at the limp corpse. Time congeals. Blonde hair fans over the grass, framing a pale face with white eyes. The slip dress—the same one you pulled over her head.

Her swollen belly.

You go rigid. Kyle has to yank hard to get you upright.

"Come on!"

"They left her."

The words spill numbly from your lips.

When he shoots another Grey, your wooden, puppet legs move. You leave the body of her behind, adrenaline numbing you. After what is realistically only minutes but feels like hours, the thick trees envelop you once again, and when you finally steal a glance, you can't see them anymore. They've lost your scent for now. Enough for you to pause against a tree, swallowing air to catch your breath. 

You walk deeper into the vegetation until Kyle feels satisfied enough to stop and retrieve a canister of water from his backpack. He offers it to you. It takes a moment to steady it at your lips, then your throat allows some down. But your stomach spasms almost instantly, and you are wrenching it back up at the base of a tree, crumpling to your knees.

"Shit."

Hands collect your hair.

A few more dry heaves consume you, until you're breathing harshly through a hanging mouth.

"No… They didn’t—" A hard swallow. "They let her out. She was in the cell."

"What?" His voice brushes your neck, touch halting at your shoulders. Realization softens his tone. "You knew her—the pregnant one."

You wipe your mouth and stand. His hands stay at your arms a beat too long, grip firm, like he’s waiting for something—an explanation you don’t give. You don’t meet his eyes. "We need to move."

Your stomach still aches, but you don't vomit again. You walk quickly out of the trees and to the road. 

The walk back is spent scanning more closely to see if you've drawn more with your smell. By the time you reach the cliff, midday swelters. Lightheadedness teeters your first attempt down. Kyle tosses the box and rifle to the bottom, then carries you on his back, your fingers interlocking to keep you secure like the backpack that hugs his chest. 

A stop at the creek allows a shaky handful of water to splash your face. Taking off your jeans to wash your blood-stained thighs feels too much of a task. Instead, you watch Kyle finally finish striking the lock, the metal giving way under his relentless grunts. 

"Do you want me to open it?" He glances at you.

A slow shake of your head. Your knees sink before it. Fingers hesitate at the latch. If this isn’t it—if it’s empty—you don’t know what comes next. What fills the space where the smallest sliver of hope has wedged itself in.

The scrape of rusted metal.

At first, all you see is cloth. A yellowed shade of white. A beat of nothing. Then, your hands move on their own accord, unwrapping the contents, brushing hard plastic. The faint rattle of capsules makes you inhale before you even read the first label: amoxicillin. You go still. Dig through for more. Four, five vials. Even more than what you had on you.

The run back to the house is a battle against your own legs.

The smell of blood hits first—thick, metallic. Not human. A quick glance confirms it, Price carving up a hefty cattle he must've found.

He's saying something, to Kyle maybe. You don’t pause.

The front door swings open.

Blue—

She slams into you, arms locking tight, breath knocked from your lungs.

"I saw you from the window."

"You shouldn’t be on your feet," you manage.

She looks down. At your hand. At the pills.

Her voice trembles. "You… you found it?"

You nod.

Up the stairs. Blue tugging at your sleeve. Kyle's steps audible behind you. The bedroom waits. Stale air. Ghost—he's lying on his stomach the way you left him, but a smother of something sticky glistens on his back. 

"Honey," Blue mumbles, wincing as she lowers on the bed. "Ari... he found a hive. I was just about to put clean bandages, too. It helps, right?"

"Not as much as this should help."

Kyle begins lifting him.

"He was up for a bit, but he was... talking weird," Blue whispers as you kneel at Ghost's side, fight the shake in your hand to unscrew the cap. "He asked if you were sleeping outside—like, out loud, to himself. Then he kept saying ‘sparks’ and ‘Washington.’ Do you know what that means?"

The words barely register anything but confusion and the fact that he is even worse. It's Kyle who answers under his breath. "No clue." His gets Ghost upright without disturbing his wounds, steadying a hand at the back of his skull. 

When your thumb presses at his bottom lip, the dry, cracked skin resists. As you try to pry it apart, his eyes flicker open—unfocused. Dilated pupils shift to yours.

"I need you to open," you whisper around the tightness in your throat. "It's amoxicillin. We've got it."

Overgrown hair clings to his forehead, thick and unruly. Sharp stubble scrapes your hand as you try again to open his mouth. Labored breaths hit your knuckles, unnervingly hot, along with a release of words he murmurs through his teeth. "There you are... again. 

Your teeth graze your cheek. "Here I am. Now open, please."

He does—barely. The chalky pill makes it to his tongue. The rest blurs.

Waking up on edge is nothing new.

At first, you keep your eyes shut—squeezing them until the backs turn red. Then, true consciousness jolts through your limbs, setting a heavy heartbeat between your ears. Light floods your vision. Soft cheeks. Pink lips, pursed. Brows knitted tight.

"You make the strangest faces in your sleep sometimes."

"I..."

"Water?"

"Please," you croak.

Pins and needles prickle your fingers as you lift your head. A mug presses to your blistered lips, gentle fingers stroking the greasy hair at your temple. The gulp of water almost makes you moan. You're ready to down the entire things until it's pulled away.

"You're gonna throw up again if you keep going."

You lick your lips. "What?"

"You've been passed out for two days," Blue explains. "Except for when we tried to get you to eat and drink, but that was a fucking struggle. Nereida says you overworked yourself. Not enough sleep and water can kill you, you know." Her brow arches. "I told you not to do anything stupid, but I guess you've been doing that."

Two days.

You inhale through lungs that feel primitive. 

"He—"

"Before you ask, yes. We've been giving him the meds. Morning and evening. His fever finally went down last night. He's been out since."

Your eyes finally drift to the other side of the bed. A steady rise and fall presses warmth into the sheets. You scramble up, reaching over—his cheek meets your palm, warm, but not alarmingly so. Normal, almost. A faint flush dusts his skin, the color creeping back in. His back is freshly bandaged, but his eyelids still bear the violet tinge of exhaustion.

"It's helping." The words press into your teeth. 

The rest of the day passes in gentle fragments. 

A bowl of fire-braised beef pressed into your hands. You eat without tasting, slow chewing through lush fat, while Price and Kyle pore over a more detailed almanac they found in the house. The food settles heavy, to the point of discomfort, but stays down. 

Later, you wade into the creek with Nereida. She was the one who changed you while you were out—scrubbing the dirt from your legs, tucking fresh towels and a new pair of underwear beneath you. You only realize she added rosemary when a sprig falls out as you undress.

You listen to her talk. You don’t tell her about Salome. No. You keep it to yourself. The water is warm. At first, you don’t feel it. But as it swallows your shins and carries away ribbons of dried blood, the gentle current soothes, taking the edge off the sun, which turns the rocks along the bank scorching hot. Birds call from the trees—you don’t know what kind. Worm-like minnows tickle your sore toes.

Back at the house, you sit on the porch to wring out your hair. You catch Ari carrying Blue through the garden, her head tucked against his shoulder, bandaged feet dangling over the arm that hooks under her knees. They whisper about something. His steps are slow, pausing by a beautiful patch of flowers that, apparently, smell rancid by the way she leans in and recoils, making a face. When you look away, Kyle is staring at you across the grass as he hangs strips of beef over a tree branch to dry. 

You should thank him. For not letting you do the stupid thing alone. But instead, you shift your gaze to the sun and watch its slow descent on your own, studying the way it casts an orange glow across the wild growth. It's the sudden assault of dark clouds that send everyone inside. A summer rain that bursts down without warning, without mercy. 

It hasn't relented by the time you fix a bowl of meat for Ghost. He has yet to ingest anything but bone broth and some plum juice according to Blue and Nereida. You chew off little pieces of the least fattiest parts into a bowl and give it to Blue. You go with her to feed him but stop short, keeping your distance. You simply watch from across the room as he manages to sit up on his own despite swaying, brushing away Price's helping arm, and chewing slowly with great effort. His eyes, focused and clear, flit upward to yours. You hold them for a moment, until the pull in your chest turns intolerable, and you look down at his bandaged shoulder instead. 

"Tastes good?" Blue murmurs, brushing the hair from his forehead.

He hums. 

"How do you feel?"

He swallows, then lifts a hand to her hair, thumbing at it. "Young again."

She places her hand over his, biting a smile. "You're so annoying."

She wipes at her eyes. 

Instead of easing, the rain intensifies as the night deepens. Distant thunder rolls closer, flashing into overhead lightning that only sharpens your edge. Blue spends the night with Ari in the living room, where Kyle helped them set up a small fort of blankets and pillows—a small distraction, but one she could use. It takes a nudge from you to push past her hesitation, to convince her it’s okay to leave Ghost’s side, just for a little while.

"It's good to have some space, if you need it."

That leaves you alone in the bedroom with him. He knocked out again after eating. You redo his bandages, relieved to find the wounds free of pus. New scabs have begun to form, fragile but promising.

But you can't lay down. You try—perch at the edge of the bed, press your palms into the mattress—then you're back on your feet.

The walls feel too close. The air too thick. His steady breathing should ground you, should ease something inside you, but it doesn’t. The storm is unyielding, pressing against the house, rattling the windows. It drives your nails into your palms, into the raw skin around them. A string ties itself around your ankles, pulling one foot in front of the other until you're in the hallway, hand blindly skimming the wall to guide you to the spiral staircase.

Upward.

The library. You don’t even realize you’ve come here until you freeze at the top of the stairs, staring at the wreckage left behind by your hands. Books lie scattered across the floor, pages severed and crumpled. A curtain rod rests askew, displaced in the quiet ruin.

When you finally move, it’s a mindless ordeal. The motions of putting the room back together—guided only by the stray flash of lightning—steal any thoughts before they can form. You kneel, gently stacking books against your chest, slotting them one by one back onto the oak shelves. Embellished spines offer familiar titles, even in French. A lot of Jane Austen.

"No Hemingway, huh?" you whisper, swiping a finger through the blanket of dust before bending for more books. You reach the last shelf, lips twitching. "I'm fixing you. Happy now?"

Of course, no answer. Only the faint slide of leather against the wood. 

He’s in the room before you notice.

The presence registers as a skim along the back of your neck.

But you don’t turn, hand freezing after you release Le Comte de Monte-Cristo, then dropping limp at your side. You know it’s him. You feel it in the shift of the air, the weight of it settling differently around you. More so in the slow, deliberate footfalls, each one measured, as if testing the ground. And if none of that gives him away, the warmth of his breath—heavy, uneven—spilling over your scalp does. It sinks into your skin when he reaches you, winds through your veins, curls your toes against the floor until they hurt.

You try to inhale, but the breath snags, fracturing in your throat. "You shouldn’t be up."

"I shouldn't."

His hand lifts, knuckles skimming the flannel draped over your frame before grazing your neck with a slow, unhurried sweep of his thumb. It trails down your arm, pausing at the last book in your grasp. He takes it from you—or maybe it slips from your weak grip. You can't tell.

With a deep breath, he reaches the shelf above you. The book doesn't fit at first, his hand unsteady, struggling to align it. A final rough shove of his knuckles forces it into place. He’s close. You knew he was, but now his scent wraps around you—mossy, salty, earth that you fall face-first into. His chest skims your spine. An elbow grazes your ear as he finishes.

And then he turns you.

His fingers curl around your shoulder, guiding you until you're facing him. Your feet slide to follow, reluctant and all too willing. Storm-filtered light catches on the sharp cut of his jaw, casting it in shadow. You brace yourself. An unformed breath fills your chest. You're unable to meet his eyes—though you feel them, tracing every inch of your face.

Wordless, he takes hold of your wrist. You don’t understand why until he cradles it in his rough palm, between your chests. His chapped lips lower to the tail-end of the healing cut, light enough not to stir pain.

His lips move.

But you don't.

It's as if every function of your brain is funneled into the nerves beneath each kiss he trails up your forearm. Soft, unwavering, yet each one lingering for a beat longer than the last. The next one lands at the crease in your elbow. A breath finally rushes out of your nose when he reaches the top of your shoulder, close enough to the pounding artery in your neck to invite heat over your cheeks. A strange heat. The same temperature of the moisture that begins to cloud your vision. 

You tremble. "Ghost, I—" 

You make a last-ditch effort to clutch the hem of his jeans before your knees can waver, his mouth finding your throat. He kisses the part of it that bobs. Then pulls away just enough to cup your face between his hands, forcing your gaze to his. What you are met with is twin, black eyes. They unnerve you. Like the ground beneath your feet, it feels like they might swallow you whole and spit you out. 

You can't breathe. The shaking is uncontrollable. Rapid blinks dispel the moisture in your eyes before you're gasping, pressing into him. "Please... please. Ghost, I—" you choke, "Please, I just—"

You sound scared, even to your own ears. Like you might get hurt if you he doesn't give you what you're asking for. But you don't know what you're asking for—don't understand why the soft kisses he places on your forehead and cheeks feel like too much and not enough at the same time. You clasp his wrist to pull his hands off your face, nails piercing into the skin there. He allows it—you hurting him—even when almost his entire upper half is swathed in bandages. 

"You're shaking," he murmurs.

"I'm fine." You exhale, but it’s uneven, shaky in its own right. "I just need—"

His thumb presses under your chin in attempt to still you.

A swallow forces down the lump in your throat. The ghost of an inhale. Then you lunge, kissing him. Not gentle or hesitant. But with a desperate growl, bursting forth from your mouth into his, your hand threading into his hair and holding tight onto his skull.

miss pretty

{single dad!katsuki bakugo x kindergarten teacher f!reader}

summary: katsuki bakugo has never liked mess and always made sure his son and his life reflected just that. with years worth of a sparkling clean and organized home, toys put away and not once scattered about, and a barking knack over any calls of disorder in his life— meeting you, his sons sweet and sugary kindergarten teacher who was the definition of pure and who was for some reason turning his fiery heart into complete goo— was altering his boring strict cycles of no messes around… and for the better.

warnings: cursing, FLUFFF GALORE MY GAWD??, no smut but a lil steamy something, slight angst, afab!reader, katsuki thinks you are an ANGEL, sunshine x grumpy trope, mentions of abandonment, WHOLESOME AFFF, use of y/n, all characters are aged up.

word count: 11.4k

authors note: THIS MAKES ME WANT TO BE A MOTHERRRRR omg this one is sickeningly sweet and i’ve gotten a few requests to do sunshine x grumpy with sir katsuki and i WAS ALLL OVERRR ITTT i hope i fulfilled!!! <333 THANK YOU THANK YOU AS ALWAYS FOR ALL OF YOU BEING SOOO SWEETT TO MEEE I LOVE YOUUUU MWAAAHHH :] <33333

katsuki bakugo hated messes.

“oi!” he grunted, his son’s little head turning to look at him as he munched on his gummy fruit snacks from the backseat. “you better not leave that wrapper in here. take it outside with you when i drop you off.”

“kaaayyy!” his son dragged out happily, completely unphased by his dads snappy personality as he contemplated on which color fruit gummy to eat next.

“and wash your hands too. ask your teacher.”

“mhm!” he chirped.

“and don’t be a brat. pay attention.”

“yup yup!”

and for the most part, his life reflected that almost entirely— raising his son to always clean up after himself and not make bombastic huge messes around the house, begrudgingly understanding that he’s a small growing human, that a little spill of apple juice or two is basically guaranteed… but he just hated mess, and he’ll be damned if he doesn’t raise his son right to be a clean and organized man even at five years old— katsuki keeping everything in his life practically spotless.

that was of course, until he met you.

katsuki shoved through the other parents in line as he went up to the front desk in the main office with a grip on his sons little hand, not giving a damn about the glares and huffs of bewilderment he got as there was no way in hell he was gonna wait like an idiot with the rest of them.

the lady at the front desk raised a quizzical eyebrow.

“can i help—”

“where the fuck is room twenty four.”

her eyes bulged open as the rest of the parents in line softly gasped and murmured.

“e—excuse me?—”

he rolled his eyes.

“room twenty four.” he pushed. “where is it?”

“sir— if you need me to help you i’d like you to wait in line until—”

“hah?! absolutely not.” he spat. “if i wait in that fucking line my son’s gonna be late why can’t you just tell me—”

“uh sir if you could—”

katsuki’s son giggled as he continued to spout profanities at the poor front desk lady.

“—sir please no foul language there are children around—”

“i don’t give a shit! just tell me where room twenty four is what the hell is so hard about that?!—”

“oh! that’s my class!”

katsuki snapped his head over, fiery red eyes shooting towards the voice until they landed on yours.

“is he one of my kids?” you smiled sweetly, eyes coming down to look at his son.

“oh—” he let his shoulders relax just a tad as he watched you fix the strap of his sons backpack on his shoulder. “i mean— if your class is twenty four—“

“it is!” you beamed, nudging your head. “i’ll show you where!”

“hiii miiiissss!” his son greeted, happy and silly as he followed you down the hall.

“hi honey!” you gushed, just as excited as he was as you patted over his blonde scruffy hair. “what’s your name?”

“milo!”

“nice to meet you milo! are you excited for your first day?”

“yeaaahh!” he cheered, smile bright as he grabbed your hand.

katsuki’s eyes widened.

“milo!” he snapped lowly. “what’d i tell ya? you can’t grab her hand like that you have to ask—”

“oh it’s alright!” you dismissed, smiling. “i don’t mind it at all! the other kids do it too.”

milo snickered and stuck his little tongue out at his dad, and katsuki rolled his eyes.

“is he yours?” you asked kindly, tilting your head.

“who else would he be…” he grumbled.

“i guess you’re right!” you giggled. “he looks just like you.”

katsuki’s eyes flickered to yours before dropping back down, a permanent furrow in his brows as you all rounded the corner.

“here we are—”

“ooo! ooo!” milo hopped up and down. “miss you have race cars?! dad can i please go?!”

he looked over, a mountain of toys scattered about in the classrooms play area, little kids already making a damn mess and the school day hadn’t even officially started yet.

“the hell you asking me for? ask your tea—”

“miss miss can i please go play with the race cars?!—”

“of course my love! go! go have fun.” you smiled, gently ushering him on before milo zoomed over to the play area and crouched down with the rest of the kids.

“oi!” katsuki barked. “put them away when you’re done!”

he huffed under his breath as he watched his son give him a thumbs up and fucking dump the entire bucket of race cars down on the ‘abc’ play rug, taking one in each hand and dragging them across floor.

“he’s so cuteee.” you grinned. “i’m glad he’s not afraid being it’s his first day.”

“oh fuck no.” he mumbled. “milo doesn’t care. the little runt doesn’t have a filter and does whatever the hell he wants without askin’ sometimes.”

he leaned against the doorsill as he watched milo converse with another kid and share a car, satisfaction in his chest that his son was sharing and being nice.

“but i guess he gets that from me.” he finished off.

you nodded. “but that’s a good thing, isn’t it?”

he pursed his lips.

“in my experience, not really.”

you hummed.

“i think it’s definitely a good thing… i’d rather be assertive of things and not be afraid of what the consequences will be.”

katsuki looked at you, properly this time.

“what’s a kindergarten teacher afraid of?”

you shrugged, a slow playful grin spreading across your face.

“parents.”

he snorted, crossing his arms over his chest and you quickly had to look away, a pink buzz to your cheeks at the way his big built arms flexed.

inappropriate inappropriate inappropriate—

“i don’t know how you do it..” he spoke lowly.

“do what?”

“take care of little shits all day.”

you laughed loudly, reeling over a bit as he watched you out of the corner of his eye.

“i don’t take care of them! i teach them.” you quipped cutely. “they’re small, but this is when their brains drink up the most knowledge… and i love to see the progress from the beginning of the year compared to the end! i love it all really.”

pure.

katsuki curtly nodded, your sweet positive ambiance throwing him completely off, as he doesn’t think he’s ever met or surrounded himself around someone who’s directly emmitted the feeling of sunshine and rainbows and candy as much as you did.

and his cheeks flared up for some reason.

“oh!” you looked to the time on your little wrist watch and walked inside your classroom. “it’s almost time to start! i have to wrangle them all in their seats heh!”

katsuki swallowed and nodded.

“milo!”

he turned and upon seeing his dad wave him over, milo dropped his toys and bounded to him.

“don’t give her a hard time alright?” he spoke sternly, nudging his head over at you for emphasis. “listen. listen and learn and be the best one in there.”

“kaaayyy!”

“and you let me know if any of the other kids mess with you or you deal with it yourself. you already know how—”

“beat the crap out of them!” he cheered loudly and katsuki’s hand flew to clasp over his sons mouth before his frantic eyes looked at you.

the last thing he needed was someone to call up fucking child protective services on him.

“he’s joking! he’s joking… fuck.”

you giggled hard and clutched your stomach, your pretty smile sending katsuki for a loop.

“no you’re absolutely right!” you waved your hands in front of your face, reassuring. “treat others the way you want to be treated, so if someone’s being mean to you, bite back milo, okay? and also let me know first though!”

katsuki gave you a wobbly tiny smile amidst his branded serious face, looking at his son then and ruffling up his hair.

“okay, go.” milo ran off. “and don’t let me pick you up with dirt all over your clothes ya hear me?!”

“byeee daaaddd!”

you could tell that behind his harsh exterior— the slight purse of his lips, stiff frame and bouncing leg gave away that he was only worried about his kid and his first day of school, a sight you’ve seen time and time again since you started working as a kindergarten teacher, and one that never failed to warm your heart.

“don’t worry!” you sweetly smiled, and katsuki switched his gaze over to yours. “i’ll watch him especially… okay? to ease the nerves.”

he softly snorted, attempting to play it off but internally relieved as he pushed himself off the doorsill and nodded, thankful that the teacher milo got was as kind as you.

“um…” he mumbled. “katsuki.”

you tilted your head. “katsuki?”

“it’s my name idiot.”

“oh!” you giggled, a blush rising in your cheeks again as you tried to simmer it down. “nice to meet you katsuki! i’ll see you after school then with milo?”

he stiffly nodded, the way his name sounded so sugary off your tongue something he’d never heard before in his life or was used to at all.

“…ya gonna tell me yours or what?”

“sorry!” you sputtered, laughing nervously. “sorry it just— flew! you know—”

you stuck your hand out and offered it to him.

“y/n!”

katsuki untangled his arms and firmly shook it, grip strong and one that nearly made you stumble forward as you caught yourself and smiled.

“i’ll see you katsuki!”

out of all of the kids you’ve taught, milo was by far the cutest one.

the little man was like your personal assistant— a little bee buzzing around as he followed you everywhere in the classroom and helped you clean up after the rest of the kids that didn’t, ‘yelling’ at some of them to and cutely scolding them whenever he’d catch them leave some things behind, and was always on watch for you like a security guard with his little balled up fists on his hips, surveilling the classroom for any misbehaving kids or messes that you’d missed throughout the day.

all traits you no doubt knew he got from katsuki, even if you had just met him. it was pleasantly obvious.

“thanks for helping me out today, milo!” you gushed, pushing another students chair in as they all sat down and chattered for lunch. “you made my job a lot easier!”

“really?!” he squealed, big glimmering eyes beaming up at you before he happily chowed down on some apple slices.

and you noticed then milo’s lunch was insane, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches cut up and molded neatly into the shape of panda bears, his watermelon and apple slices shaped like stars with carrots and celery lined up with a little wedge of lemon if he wished, tiny rice balls on the side for a little snack you figured in case what he had didn’t fill him up— all so considerate and careful…

“wow!” you exclaimed, kneeling down next to him. “your lunch looks so yummy my love! did your mommy make this?”

“nuh uh!” he shook his head, cheeks filled with watermelon. “my dad did!”

you faltered.

“katsuki made this?”

“who’s katsuki miss?” he asked curiously, sipping on his little juice box after swallowing the fruit in his mouth.

you giggled. “nothing! nothing. enjoy your lunch okay?”

you went to stand, but milo’s hand shot out and caught your wrist.

“can you— can you eat lunch with me?” he mumbled shyly, fiddling with some carrot pieces in his hands. “please.. i always eat with my dad but he’s not here…”

your eyes softened and you quickly nodded.

“of course! let me just go grab my lunch and ill bring it over! sounds good?”

“yaaaayyyy!” he cheered happily, arms up as you scooched a tiny chair over from a nearby table and sat with him, laughing at his cute expression.

you knew you shouldn’t use a little kid to pry… but you were guiltily curious as to know if katsuki was married or not for reasons that made you ridiculously flustered and red in the face over.

and you wanted to be respectful in case he was… since the ogling you did at his muscles this morning through his black ribbed tank was the most embarrassing moment of your career and one you hadn’t seen coming at all, it catching you off guard and feeling horrible if katsuki indeed had a wife.

but he didn’t have a ring on his finger…

“milo?” you spoke up softly.

he smiled big. “yes miss!”

“does your mommy make you lunch as well or just your dad?”

he shook his head. “just my dad! i don’t have a mom.”

your shoulders deflated.

he didn’t have a mom… at all?

you slowly reached over then and patted his blonde hair, smiling warmly as his cheeks went pink. “that’s alright! i’m sure your dad makes you lunches like this every time huh?”

“yeah!” he gasped excitedly. “yesterday he made pizzas and cut them into dinosaurs! it was so cool! and then!— and then this morning for breakfast i had waffles that looked like dynamite blasts!”

“oh my goodness!” you giggled, your heart absolutely thumping over the fact that katsuki was so dedicated to his son like that. “man, i wish my lunches were as cute as yours!”

his little eyes snapped to yours.

“i’ll tell him!”

your brows furrowed confusedly. “wha—”

“to make you lunch! i’ll tell my dad to make you lunch!”

your eyes widened and you frantically shook your head, cheeks blazing as you laughed. “oh no my love! that’s totally okay don’t worry about me silly—”

“i’ll tell him i’ll tell him i’ll tell him!—”

“milo it’s okay! i’m a big girl.” you grinned. “i’m supposed to make my own lunches.”

milo grumbled and plopped a carrot in his mouth, begrudgingly chewing as he sat there in thought.

“…will you at least let me share some of mine?”

you pouted at his generosity, wondering how a kid could be so sweet as you nodded and held your hand up.

“of course sweetie! whatever you wa—”

milo plopped all of his peanut butter sandwiches in your palm and grinned, earning a gasp from you.

“milo this is too much i can’t—”

“eat it! eat it! eait it!—”

by the end of the day, you managed to get milo to take back his sandwiches in exchange for one singular watermelon star piece, him still doing his regular duties of being your little assistant and helping you clean up after everyone before the final bell rang signaling the end of class, you carefully making sure each kiddo got their designated backpack (as there was often a mix up) and art pieces they made for their parents to take home— a permission slip for the end of the year field trip tucked away inside their bags.

and the minute you stepped outside with the rest of the kids, you were surprised to see that katsuki was one of the first parents there as he stood directly across from your classroom with crossed arms, an angry usual scowl on his face that made you laugh to yourself as you led your kids to sit down on a bench in a single file line until their parents physically came to get them or their vehicles pulled up.

“milo!” you tapped his shoulder gently. “your daddy’s over there!”

“DAAADDD!!”

milo jumped up and ran across the grass, his tiny arms out as katsuki smiled softly and crouched down to pick his son up and settle him on his lower abdomen, you wringing your fingers behind your back and walking up to them.

“were you a brat?” he grunted.

“nope!”

“did any kids mess with you?”

“nope!”

“did you leave a mess?”

“nope!”

you giggled, and katsuki’s eyes snapped in your direction.

“how was he?”

“he did so good!” you gushed, patting milo’s back as he grinned. “was my little helper and everything! didn’t leave a single mess behind and helped me clean up after everyone else… he even made sure everyone was paying attention and not misbehaving.”

“yeah! yeah! see dad?” milo poked his dads cheek. “i didn’t lie!”

“never said you lied you little runt.” he scowled. “…but good job.”

“thanks!”

katsuki set him down after milo started kicking his legs and saying something about the swings, him instantly running towards the playground and to the slide.

“did he actually do all of that?” he spoke up.

“oh yes!” you quickly nodded. “i’ve never had a kid do that before so it was really nice of him to!”

you detached your fingers from around your back and fiddled with them.

“you teach him well katsuki.”

he scoffed and turned his head, cheeks pink as he tried to regain his composure.

“damn right i do.”

you giggled then, the memory of milo telling you he didn’t have a mother suddenly popping into your mind as you watched him happily slide down the blue slide head first.

“hey i don’t mean to um..” you timidly began. “i don’t mean to pry but—”

katsuki raised a brow at you and you snapped your mouth shut.

“nothing! nothing nevermind—”

“spit it out.”

“no it’s alright! sorry i—”

he glared and you cowered, smiling bashfully as you bit your bottom lip.

“milo… milo mentioned that he didn’t have a mommy? i was just— wondering if that was true…”

“tch—” he shook his head. “that’s what you were afraid of askin’ me?”

“i told you i’m scared of parents…” you slumped cutely, and he chuckled.

“it’s just me and him.” he answered. “his mom’s never been a part of our lives.”

your heart sunk a little, eyes sad as your gaze shifted to milo playing and racing around with another kid.

“don’t do that.”

you jumped and looked at katsuki.

“do— do what—”

“look all sad and shit.”

he hesitantly reached over and planted an index finger to the crease between your brows, the feeling rough as he tried to gently drag it down and smooth over the lines.

“it’s fine.” he grumbled, letting his arm fall to his side. “it doesn’t bother him. at least i don’t think it does.”

“no!” you spoke quickly, a crazed blush on your cheeks. “it doesn’t! and milo speaks so highly of you… especially the lunches you make him.”

his brows furrowed. “his lunch?”

“yeah!” you nodded excitedly. “you prepare it so so well! how do you get his sandwiches to look like little bears? and his fruit?! every time i try to cut mine into stars they always break in half…”

he huffed out a laugh, finding your little whine funny as he reached over and ruffled up your hair, you smiling cheekily in response.

“do you use molds?” you asked politely. “to shape out the bear?”

“fuck no.” he scoffed. “i do it myself.”

your eyes flew open.

“what?! so that’s really just you? and the dinosaurs too? the pizza dinosaurs? and the waffles? the ones that looked like dynamite blasts—”

“jesus christ how much did that kid tell you?”

your face grew hot as you smacked a hand over your mouth.

“sorry!” you giggled. “i just was thinking— that his lunch was really cute and thoughtful…” you took your hand away from your face. “i’m really glad that you do little things like that for milo to make him happy.”

katsuki stared at you, your swarm of compliments and sweetness and sunshine and butterflies almost suffocating as you looked at him with those pretty doe eyes, his throat oddly closing up the longer he stared right back and allowed you to pull him into your world of wonder and abc blocks and puzzles.

but it wasn’t suffocating in a bad way, not at all.

and… maybe he did want you to pull him in.

“dad dad dad!”

milo ran over, sweaty and red faced as he reached the two of you.

“there’s a dead lizard in the slide!”

“a dead lizard?” you laughed, surprised as you reached for his little water bottle from his backpack on the ground and uncapped the lid, handing it over and ushering him to drink.

katsuki didn’t know why the domestic sight of you doing that made him melt a bit.

a bit.

“yeah miss! it was big and gross.” he breathed out after gulping some of his icy cold water. “but i buried him!”

his dads red eyes snapped down to his and narrowed.

“don’t tell me you touched that thing milo.”

“i did!” he giggled.

“oh my fucking god—” katsuki snatched his hand and started pulling him to the car as milo giggled and stuck his tongue out.

“it’s a prank! some other girl in my class did… but i helped with the dirt!”

you chuckled softly as you watched katsuki stop and roll his eyes, coming back over to you with a hyper milo.

“say bye to your teacher ya little runt. and you’re still taking a shower when you get home!”

“but i don’t wanna take a showeerrr!” milo whined, letting go of his dads hand and running to you, you crouching and extending your arms big with a pretty smile.

“bye my love!” you hugged him tight as he giggled. “i’ll see you tomorrow okay? and give your daddy a break. no more digging up dirt and playing with dead lizards.”

“kaayyyy!”

you both let go and he stepped back, pressing a quick kiss to your cheek before bouncing back to his dad.

katsuki choked on his spit.

“oi!” he barked. “you can’t just kiss her cheek milo the hell is going on with you?!—”

“it’s okay don’t worry!” you smiled kindly. “he’s just being sweet is all! i don’t mind.”

“you sure?” he pushed, milo snickering. “i—”

you waved him off and wrung your fingers behind your back, leaning forward.

“i’ll see you tomorrow morning kats!”

and he froze, nodding hard as he quickly took milo’s hand and backpack before walking to the car, his heart completely aflame in his chest and cheeks red as he led his babbling son further into the parking lot and inside the car, buckling him up in his car seat before hopping in himself and starting the engine, unbelieving that he had barely just met you and he was already thinking and acting like a fucking dumbass.

“and then we learned the days of the week! oh!— and we learned numbers! i can count to fifteen dad!”

“that’s good milo.” he responded, pulling out of the schools parking lot and craning his neck to see if he could catch a final glimpse of you and settling once he did, you so pretty and conversing so nicely with another kid until he was out of the lot.

“did you eat all of your lunch? y/n tells me ya shared with her.”

“i did! i did share with her.” he grinned. “she liked my lunch!”

“good.” katsuki gave him a thumbs up through the rear view mirror. “that’s good that you always share. especially with her.”

“yup yup! she’s preeettyyy.”

he rolled his eyes, but a small smile grew at the corner of his lips as he nodded curtly.

“that she is.”

katsuki continued to drop off his son personally at your classroom every morning before school.

even when it had been a couple of months into the year, at this point many students already used to their route to and out of class and their parents just dropping them off and leaving— them not even allowed on campus as security rounded every corner and told any parents who wished to go in that they weren’t supposed to, as per policy.

but not katsuki.

katsuki didn’t give a fuck as he stormed through the main office and ignored the calls of the front desk lady, her already used to the rude asshole who came through the building every morning as he strode by and down the hall to class twenty four… wanting to see you— his son’s pretty kindergarten teacher that was sweet and joyful and someone who was everything he wasn’t, his mind curious and filled with your giggles and smiles throughout the time that he’d gotten to know you and chat with you in the mornings and the afternoons, loving the way you were with milo and treated him like he was literally your own— always watching over him and making sure he had had enough to eat and drink and that his hands were washed when he wasn’t around.

and even katsuki himself— you bringing him candy bags from their classroom parties or donuts that were passed to faculty in the mornings and saving yours for him, treats he always took and ate with no questions asked even though he wasn’t a fan of sugary shit and junk food, always making the exception for you.

he had never experienced honest help like that… he’d never experienced someone caring enough about him and his son like the way you did so perfectly every single day…

and katsuki feared that he was a little obsessed.

“oh! miss y/n!”

“yes honey?” you responded kindly, opening a juice pouch for another student and handing it to them carefully during lunch.

milo dug into his lunch pail and pulled out a small container, sticking his hand up and offering it to you.

your brows furrowed, taking it from him.

“what’s this milo?”

“it’s from my dad!”

you stopped, heart dropping to your ass as you recounted his words.

from katsuki?

“your— your dad?”

“mhm!”

you shakily popped the lid of the container open, eyes widening and filling with hearts once you saw a mix of star shaped strawberries and watermelon and papayas, drizzled over with sparkling strings of honey and singular little blueberries scattered about.

“for me?” you asked softly, crouching down next to milo. “my love— are you sure this isn’t for you? i think your dad cut these up for you—”

“nope! for you!” he gave you a big toothy smile before stuffing his mouth with crackers. “he told me not to eat it and to give it to you.”

he swallowed and reached up, you tilting down your head so he could pat it just like you always did for him.

“i hope you like it miss! they look like the ones you told me looked cute!”

“i— i love them milo.. thank you!”

you picked up a papaya piece and ate it, entirely dazed and love struck as your tastebuds savored over the sweet velvety thick honey, literally blinking back tears at how thoughtful and kind katsuki was.

he didn’t have to do this at all… yet he took the time anyways out of his morning to do this for you.

and your heart nearly fucking gave out.

after school once you got your rowdy kids to sit neatly on the bench and wait for their parents, you extended a hand for milo and he hopped off the bench and took it, you both walking up to a waiting katsuki as he stood there with a soft smile on his face.

“hi kats!”

“hey.” he picked his son up and settled him over his abdomen, milo’s arms clinging around his neck and chin propped up on his dads shoulder as he was exhausted from a days worth of playing and learning.

“i wanted to um—” you peered up at him. “i um—”

his brows furrowed, and just as he was about to bark about you stumbling over your words, he stopped.

your bottom lip was trembling.

you hurriedly wiped your eyes.

“i wanted to thank you—” hic! “f—for the star shaped fruit this morning—”

“why are you crying dumbass?” he mumbled, reaching over and wiping some tears with his rough fingers.

“because it was so nice!” you sobbed, shoulders shaking as you let him wipe your cheeks. “and— and you put honey over it too! you didn’t have to do any of that for me!”

“tch—”

he flicked your forehead softly, not enough to hurt you but enough to get you to snap out of your hiccups as you sniffled.

“it’s just fruit y/n—”

“but it’s not.” you wiped your eyes again. “not to me anyways…”

katsuki slowly lowered his arm, gaze tracing over your pretty face and perfect hair and the way you cried over something so stupid, his brain unable to process the fact that an act as simple as cutting fruit up for you could make you this happy, and it made him want to see what you saw for once— how you saw the world for exactly what it was and appreciated it regardless of how big or small things were, not snippy or angry or spiteful over everyone and thinking everything was out to get him and his son.

“crybaby…” he grumbled. “i’m glad you liked it though.”

“i did kats.. a lot. thank you.” you wiped the last of your tears and smiled. “i’m sorry i cried.”

what a pretty sweet girl…

he shook his head and hoisted milo up, him completely knocked out with drool coming out of his mouth as katsuki felt it run down his shoulder, barely even noticing that though as his entire focus was trained purely on you.

was it okay if he… asked you out? would it be weird? would you tell him to fuck off?

katsuki internally rolled his eyes at his stupid fucking high school boy thoughts, though it didn’t alleviate the gnawing feeling that if you did tell him to fuck off… that he’d be angrily mortified at his fail and probably lose the right to talk to you since it’d be too awkward to.

but you were just so fucking sweet. all of the time.

“listen uh—” he cleared his throat, face growing hot. “i was wondering if ya wanted to eat dinner with me… sometime.”

you stared, eyes big and shocked and katsuki took it defensively and entirely the wrong way.

“forget it.” he snapped. “forget it i didn’t say shit—”

“no! no no—” you quickly shook your head. “no it’s okay i would!”

he stopped.

“you would?”

“of course!” you expressed sweetly, cheeks hurting from how big you were smiling as you tried to simmer down your giddy squeals. “i’d love to have dinner with you…”

his tense shoulders slowly relaxed, an eventual small smile growing on his face.

“a—alright uh…” he sighed. “i’d prefer to take ya somewhere nice but i don’t really have anyone to watch milo—”

you shook your head again, brows pinched. “oh no kats— we don’t have to go anywhere at all! we can order something in at your place and eat with milo? or— or my place?”

“my place.” he replied. “and i’ll cook.”

he cooks?!

“okay!” you giggled, your hand reaching up and patting over milo’s sleepy head gently. “sounds good!”

katsuki and you agreed on the details of the date after and bid each other bashful goodbyes, swooning as you watched him walk away into the parking lot with a sleeping milo in his arms and feeling like none of this was fucking real, for you couldn’t believe someone as handsome and cool as katsuki would ever be interested in someone like you.

and funnily enough, he felt the complete opposite, stressed and extra snappy as he cleaned the house from top to bottom (though it barely needed it), unnecessarily fixed the positioning of the furniture and made milo put away his toys, him not even whining or protesting like he usually did solely because the little man knew you were coming— pretty miss y/n with the pretty smile and the nicest lady he had ever met, and one he secretly hoped would be his new mommy every time he saw you and his dad converse before and after school, thinking you would fit the role perfectly.

especially after his dad had given you those fruits as a present!

“milo!” katsuki called. “come ‘ere!”

his son ran into the kitchen, toy race car in hand. “what!”

“be good today, ya hear me?” he pushed, face stern as he flipped a kitchen towel over his shoulder and sautéed vegetables in his frying pan. “please milo. don’t try to be funny and do somethin’ to scare y/n off.”

milo gave him a look.

“scare miss y/n off? dad you’re gonna scare her off not me!” he giggled. “silly.”

“yeah..” he grunted. “you’re probably right but i’m just sayin’. i’m thinking of the time grandma came over and ya put that fake rat in her purse to try and be funny.”

“ohhh yeeeeah!” he doubled over in little fits of laughter, holding his stomach as he did. “i did do that!”

“see what i mean?” katsuki grumbled, snatching the kitchen towel from his shoulder and throwing it down on the counter top, stepping back to peek in the oven. “you better not do that with y/n please.”

“i won’t!” he grinned. “not when she’s about to be my new mommy!”

katsuki choked as his spit went down the wrong pipe, bending over and coughing uncontrollably in his elbow before spinning around and looking at his son with wide eyes and pink cheeks.

“the hell you just say?”

“what!” milo tilted his head. “that y/n is gonna be my new mommy?”

his eyes grew even wider as he dropped the pan he was holding on the stove and leaned back, running his hands over his face.

“oh you little runt please don’t say that in front of her, alright?”

he pouted. “why not?”

“you’ll scare her off! worse than when you put that fake rat in grandmas purse!”

“boooo!” milo stuck his tongue out and crossed his little arms over his chest. “whatever.”

“oi!”

“what!”

katsuki’s doorbell chimed and milo booked it to the front door.

“missss preettyyyy!!—”

“milo get your ass back here!—”

katsuki swung the door open and swooped his son in his arms just as he was about to pounce on you in midair, you giggling and covering your mouth as you watched the scene unfold before you.

“i’m sorry—”

“hiii misss y/nnn!” milo greeted happily, dangling off of his dad as katsuki tried to stop him from wiggling out of his grip. “i’m so exciteeeddd!—”

“hi my love!” you gushed warmly, smile wide as you extended your arms and walked forward, taking milo in your arms and setting him on your hip. “how are you? you excited to hang out with meee?”

“yes! yes!” he vigorously nodded. “i wanna show you all my race cars!”

“oh i can’t wait to seeee!” you bounced him on your hip and he giggled, you turning your attention and smiling at katsuki.

“hi kats!”

“the little brat is hogging—”

milo blew a silly raspberry at him before wrapping his arms around you and shoving his face into your neck.

you laughed and ran a soothing hand over the little man’s back, katsuki rolling his eyes before stepping to the side and letting you in, shutting the door behind him and leading you over to the kitchen.

and jesus christ you looked beautiful, him noting that pink was what you mainly wore on the day to day as he eyed your small rosy cardigan, you walking through his home and looking around and oblivious to the way he was staring at you like a fucking creep.

katsuki bit the inside of his cheek as he watched your eyes scan your surroundings, stupidly nervous about what you’d think of his house and furniture and minuscule decorations, and annoyed with himself that he’d even give a shit about something like that, trying to occupy himself and ignore it as he looked in the oven and lifted lids of various pots and pans, checking over tonight’s dinner.

“i’m sorry i’m behind…” he grumbled and waved his hand around. “had to clean the house and shower milo since he decided to play in the fuckin’ mud this morning.”

“oh you don’t have to apologize for that kats!” you looked at him worriedly. “you don’t have to apologize for anything i totally understand…”

you hoisted milo further up your hip and grinned. “i’m just happy to spend time with the both of you.”

katsuki felt smoke puff out of his red ears as he nodded and scratched the back of his neck, turning slightly and lifting the lids from his pots and pans again.

“miss preettyyyy!” milo whined. “when can i show you my race cars?!”

katsuki scowled and you laughed.

“now honey! but how about we move some of your toys to the living room so i can spend time with both you and dad? how does that sound?”

“yayayay!!” milo cheered, bouncing on your hip as you smiled cutely and set him down, him running off down the hall and you quickly following after him.

milo talked you through his entire collection of race cars as you both sat down on the living room rug— telling you the model of each and every one, what they did, how fast they went, they places they’d gone, and which were his favorites as you excitedly talked to him about his cars and shifted conversation between him and katsuki, a task he was surprised you did so efficiently, but then quickly realized that that was literally your fucking job everyday dealing with little brats talking your ears off and you attending all of them at the same time.

and when it came around to dinner time, you helped katsuki set up even through his snapping and huffing that you absolutely shouldn’t, you giving him a silly little face as you assisted anyways and set up milo’s booster seat, picking him up and sitting him down before buckling him up while katsuki placed your dishes on the table—

and gourmet fucking dishes at that.

you were bewildered. absolutely bewildered as you gawked over the lasagna platter he set before you, it delicate and fancy looking as he had even draped sauce on your gray ceramic plate in gourmet intricate designs, knowing that katsuki had mentioned to you he was a chef over the several months you’d gotten to know him, but you didn’t know exactly to which extent that chef occupation stretched to.

“kats…” you murmured. “what do you do for a living.”

“i told you idiot.” he passed over a couple of napkins and you gratefully took them, taking one then and wiping down milo’s mouth as he messily ate his cut up pieces of lasagna. “i’m a cook.”

“yeah but what kind? where?”

“why?” he gruffed. “does it look like shit?”

“no!” you giggled. “absolutely not the opposite actually! this is probably the most beautiful lasagna i’ve ever seen in my life.”

“duh.” he responded, but sent you a small smile as he ate. “i’m an executive chef down at a restaurant in the city.”

your jaw dropped. “the city?! you’re so cool kats! oh my goodness!”

his face flushed.

“my dad says his boss is a piece of—”

“don’t say it!” katsuki snapped at his son, eyes wide as you slapped a hand over your mouth to keep yourself from laughing, not wanting to encourage the little man any further.

“milo i told ya not to cuss until you’re ten—”

“ten?!” you giggled loudly and let your hand fall, sticking your fork in your lasagna and eating. “as long as he cusses with you and not at you… i think it should be fine!”

katsuki stopped.

you get it. or you rile up his bad cussing habit. either or he might as well have found his fucking soulmate.

“miss pretty!” milo called.

“yes my love?”

“do you have a boyfriend?”

katsuki smacked a hand on his forehead and you snickered.

“i don’t!” you grinned. “why milo?”

“because i want you to be my new—”

“milo if ya shut your mouth right now i’ll buy you two new race cars tomorrow.”

his son gasped dramatically and pursed his lips shut, eyes big and excited as he tried to contain himself and do as told.

“his new what?” you tilted your head cutely, katsuki’s heart hammering against his rib cage as he stuffed his mouth with food.

he shrugged. “the fuck should i know?”

“but i wanna know!” you pouted, taking your final bites of your yummy dinner.

he swallowed.

“do you want dessert?”

you gasped. “oh my god yes! i do!”

“then i suggest you shut your mouth too.”

you laughed over the table, quickly nodding as you pursed your lips like milo and pinched your thumb and index finger together, running it across your mouth and twisting your wrist like a pretend lock before dropping your hand in your lap, giddy and excited over dessert.

katsuki playfully rolled his eyes and stood, collecting all of your plates and stacking them on top of each other before taking them over to the sink.

“dad!” milo called as he bounced in his seat, katsuki grunting in response.

“what’d you make for dessert!”

“mochi.”

“yaaaayyyyy!” he cheered happily. “can i eat it with y/n in the living room?”

katsuki’s brows furrowed. “the living room?”

“yeah!” milo exclaimed. “so i can keep showing her my race cars!”

he struggled for a moment before eventually nodding. “alright… but don’t make a mess i just cleaned—”

you and milo ended up building a fucking fort once he gave you the all clear, you both saying something about it adding to the ambiance as you used the couch cushions for makeshift walls and milo’s choo choo train sheets for the roof and tent, katsuki before he knew it his entire living room a fucking mess as the three of you sat amongst the scattered about pillows and blankets eating your bits of mochi, milo mainly inside the little tent you made for him as you and katsuki were too big to fit inside with him.

his living room was a mess… but he didn’t mind.

katsuki didn’t mind the mess.

your way of living was entirely different from his, as yours had everything to do with mess due to your full time job with kids— paint all over your hands and face, marker stains on your clothes and sticky glue residue and pieces of cut up construction paper somehow in your hair, all things katsuki despised for years and made sure his house never reflected any of that.

but in that moment, with his living room in complete disarray and the positioning of his couches utterly fucked up? the dishes still in the sink and the table still set?

katsuki didn’t fucking care.

because he had never seen his son so happy. he had never seen him so excited and hyper as you helped him set up and somehow tie fairy lights that katsuki had somewhere up in his attic for holiday seasons around the fort, you looking fucking gorgeous under the dim dark lightning as you read milo one of his favorite children’s books you got from his little shelf in his room— ‘the very hungry caterpillar,’ one of your favorites too as his son followed along with you and giggled whenever you’d make a silly joke only a five year old would find funny.

and katsuki felt warm… that’s all he ever felt when he was around you.

is this what it was like to be a family?

“oh my goodness i almost forgot!” you quickly sat up and handed milo the book, him taking it as you crawled over and reached for your bag. “i brought something for you honey!”

milo gasped and sat up. “really?! what?!”

you pulled out a ceramic cream colored globe with hollowed out stars, a small bulb inside as you scooched on your knees back over to a curious katsuki and milo.

“woah..” his son whispered. “what is it?”

you smiled and reached for the nearest outlet, plugging in the little globe and flicking a switch.

the darkened room illuminated itself then with the soft murmur of a lullaby playing, star shaped shadows slowly shifting around the entire living room as milo gasped and stood, frantically pointing at each moving shadow and gushing while his little mind was trying to process how cool and fascinating this was.

and all katsuki could do was stare at you.

stare at the way you sat back on your ankles and pointed with milo, counting how many stars you could see before it shifted and repeating that for fun, stare at the way both of your eyes glowed with wonder and curiosity, and stare at the way you smiled so gracefully and looked unreal now under the starry lights, his heart on overdrive at how gentle you were and how much you cared about his son.

about him.

and katsuki was sure then he was absolutely sick over you.

you all settled after a while of playing games and eating more mochi, especially milo, the little lullaby knocking him out as he snored next to you in his fort, you and katsuki laying down next to each other as you stared up at the shifting stars.

“i’m sorry i made such a mess in your living room..” you whispered bashfully. “i promise i’ll pick everything up before i leave.”

he shook his head. “don’t worry about it i can pick up. it’s fine.”

you smiled at him warmly before looking back up at the ceiling, feet planted on the blanketed flooring as your mindlessly moved your propped up knees side to side.

“was it hard raising milo on your own kats?” you asked softly, fingers wrung together neatly on your tummy.

“it was at first.” he mumbled. “but i got used to doin’ it on my own.”

you frowned, not particularly happy with the idea that katsuki had to raise a human being on his own without any help or guidance, wishing that he would’ve had someone there to help him every once in a while, or just be there for him.

“you did an exceptional job, okay?” you began. “you should know that... milo is such an honest kid… and he’s so precious too.”

katsuki’s eyes softened, and he couldn’t bring himself to look at you in fear of you noticing his stupid flustered face as he opted for keeping his gaze glued to the starry ceiling, your sugary peachy perfume not fucking helping as he decided to sit up instead.

“he is.” he grunted softly. “don’t know how his mom didn’t see that.”

you faltered and sat up with him.

“what do you mean?”

katsuki eyed you before looking down, hands flat behind him propping himself up as he thought.

“ah… milo happened because of some random hookup i had in college.” he mumbled. “didn’t love her or anythin’, i barely knew her but still told her i’d support her and the baby obviously.”

you nodded, encouraging him to continue.

“i was there through her entire pregnancy and when milo was born… but the minute she got discharged from the hospital and took him with her, i woke up at four in the mornin’ with a knock on my door and milo left abandoned on my doorstep.”

you gasped, hand hovering over your mouth.

“are you— are you serious?”

katsuki nodded.

“she wouldn’t answer my calls, my texts, nothing. i went to her house and found out she took the first flight she could to fuck knows where.” he shook his head bitterly. “but i didn’t give a shit about me i’ll raise him i don’t care. it was never about me.

he looked at you. “it was about milo. i didn’t want him to know that his ‘mom’ left him behind like that, and i didn’t want him to think it was his fault or anythin’… shits ridiculous.”

katsuki shifted his gaze back up to the ceiling. “still don’t know how she could ever do something like that.”

the sound of a hiccup make his eyes widen and snap back to you, your eyes filled with fat tears as your bottom lip wobbled, hands coming up to cup over your mouth and nose as you tried to keep it in.

“you’re crying?”

you nodded, squeaky slight sobs slipping past your throat as you strained to keep everything down.

“that’s so cruel.” you cried softly, embarrassingly drowning in your tears in front of him yet again. “you didn’t deserve that at all kats… milo didn’t deserve that you both should’ve had such a good mommy and— and a good support system—”

katsuki pushed himself up and wrapped his big arms around your shoulders, pulling you in and rubbing a hand up and down your back comfortingly.

“you cry over everything y/n.”

“s—” hic! “—sorry—”

he laid the side of his head on top of yours as you shook, somehow feeling guilty of what he told you just because of how much you were crying.

more than when he gave you those star shaped fruits.

“oi…”

katsuki pulled back and looked at you, reaching up and wiping your tears with his thumbs.

“don’t cry baby…”

baby?!

you funnily sobbed even more and shoved your face in his chest, him chuckling as he wrapped his arms back around you and gently swayed side to side.

“stop it idiot.” he mumbled. “it’s fine. it happened years ago n’ milo and i have always been alright on our own.”

…but he wanted you now.

now that he knew what it was like to be softly cared for by someone precious like you, to feel what it was like to be warm and fuzzy and sunshine and rainbows and candy all of the time… and katsuki wanted you so. bad.

“i know..” you hiccuped. “and i’m really glad but i just wish you had someone.”

you pulled away and quickly wiped your wet cheeks. “m’sorry i cried all over your shirt—”

“don’t give a fuck.”

you breathed out a laugh and dropped your hands in your lap, looking at your fingers as you sniffed.

you were always crying for him.

“y/n.”

“yeah?”

he looked to the side with a blush to his cheeks.

“thanks for comin’ today.”

you smiled brightly and nodded.

“of course kats! how could i not?” you looked behind you to a sleeping milo, reaching over and pulling his blanket a little further up his shoulders. “i want you to know that i wanna be there for you and milo…”

he shifted his gaze to you as you turned back around.

“whether— whether you wanna keep seeing me or not—” you gnawed nervously at the inside of your cheek. “which i hope you do! but— but if not that’s totally fine i just want to be there for you both…”

how were you so pure? so thoughtful?

“why the hell wouldn’t i wanna keep seeing you?” he huffed, grumbly and embarrassed as he pursed his lips. “i’d be stupid as fuck not to…”

you blushed, happy shiny eyes looking at him eagerly like he was everything and more, and he wasn’t used to people looking at him like that whatsoever as your gaze flickered down to his lips and back up.

and you were so pretty.

“y/n.”

“mhm?”

he slowly leaned closer.

“would you be mad if i made a move on you—”

“of course not—”

katsuki lunged and planted his rough lips on yours, you tasting like straight sugar and honey as he placed his big hands on the sides of you head and held you like a piece of delicate glass, kissing and sliding your tongues in each others mouths rather quickly and breathy as he moved one hand from your pretty face down to your waist to grip it.

you placed your hands on the blanketed floor and slowly crawled over to him during the makeout, him reaching and wrapping the rest of his built muscly arms around your waist and pulling you to straddle his lap as he ran his hands up and down your sides and back, wanting to feel you as much as he possibly could and squeeze you tight as he gulped your little self down, brows furrowed and lips red.

katsuki pulled away and ran his fiery wet mouth across your jaw and to the spot right below your ear on the side of your neck, your hands gripping his broad shoulders as he bit and sucked and still squeezed you, manhandling you in a way and eating you up.

your eyes fluttered open once you heard a slight rustle, your line of sight catching milo shifting a little in his sleep.

“k—kats—” you breathlessly whispered, pushing a little at his shoulders.

he grunted.

“milo—” you pointed. “he’s waking up—”

“the fucks that gotta do with us—”

“kats!”

he groaned and pulled his mouth from you, scowling over to see his son only shifted positions and was now directly facing the both of you, tiny eyes closed as he drooled and was probably dreaming about race cars and his dads shark shaped pb & j sandwiches.

“the little runt is fine—” he shoved his face back in and gnawed at your neck again as you gasped.

“nooo!” you whined and giggled softly. “now i’m scared he’s gonna wake up…”

he huffed and officially pulled away this time, red eyes dilated and half lidded as he looked over your pinky cheeks and shy face, the purple and blue mark he made on your neck making the right side of his lips curve up into a little prideful smirk, you too distracted to notice over the way he clutched and loosened up the hold on your waist repeatedly.

katsuki kept you on his lap and scooched himself down, laying on his back and head on the pillow as he nudged you to lay on him completely over his chest and body, you more than happy to do so as you settled your head on his pecs and got comfortable with his strong arms around you— feeling so safe and looked after.

and you hadn’t expected to sleep over… but you just didn’t wanna leave, and katsuki sure as hell didn’t want you to either as you softly and quietly talked over the small tinkling of the lullaby and milo’s soft breathing, shadowy stars still slowly shifting around you as you easily switched between various topics— ranging from serious to silly as you ran a loving hand over his chest and his on your back, the both of you subconsciously lulling each other to sleep until you were just as passed out on the floor as milo.

since then, katsuki didn’t wanna let you out of his sight.

as if he wasn’t already involved enough with milo’s school activities because of you, this man became a fucking member of the pta and volunteered himself for every single event so as long as you were there, helping you out especially with fundraisers and bake sales as his desserts always sold out quicker than anything else and made bank as he snickered and boasted at the other parents that weren’t selling as much, you giving him a silly glare that never failed to shut him right up as he wanted to be good for you and not upset you.

the front desk lady even went from hating him to loving him, katsuki grumbling and chucking her a bag of leftover fundraiser chocolate chip cookies on her desk as he passed by to drop off milo in the mornings, serving as a ticket way in and to get her to shut up now instead of yelling at him from down the hall.

and he continued to give you yummy star shaped fruits.

except now some days they looked like hearts or little flowers, and he always made his fruit assortments different so you wouldn’t get tired of them and added different dippings like caramel or chocolate hazelnut, you gushing and nearly bawling literally everyday whenever you’d open the container and milo giggling at you during lunch.

you also never went a day without stopping by or staying over at katsuki’s house since your first initial date, your days so much fun and filled with love as you ate lunch or dinner with the two of them, laughing at milo’s sporadic comments or katsuki’s barking and scolding while you either played with milo, helped katsuki clean up the house and him the kitchen or you the kitchen and vice versa, or simply cuddle on the couch with kisses shared amongst you and katsuki— the three of you with milo seated peacefully and comfortable in the middle while you watched a movie or lulled the little man to sleep.

and katsuki had never felt so complete as he started leaving messes behind without even realizing or stressing about it, and he didn’t know when the fuck it was that he turned so soft and sappy— the change a bit strange to those who knew him as he was just a teeny weeny less explosive and angry over small things, and more so when it came to you and his son.

“make sure you keep your little bucket hat on honey, okay? it’s hot today and i don’t want you to tire yourself out milo.”

the end of the year field trip for the kindergarteners this year was a voyage to the local wildlife sanctuary, a gorgeous exhibit that sat right next to the national science museum in your city, its main attraction being the 25 foot koi pond and butterfly wonderland that housed various butterfly species and their little habitats— the kids field trip assignment being to count how many they see throughout the day and pick one koi fish and butterfly to draw on their journals.

katsuki, of course, volunteered as a chaperone.

“single file line please my loves!” you called, hand by your mouth. “and don’t seperate from your friends okay?! everyone stay where i can see—”

“oi!” katsuki barked, snapping and pointing at a rogue kid who decided to break free from the line and run across the grass. “the fuck do you think you’re doing!—”

“kats!” you breathed out a shocked laugh. “you’re gonna get me fired if you talk to the kids like that—”

“shit! sorry— i’m sorry baby hold on—”

katsuki booked it across the grassy lawn and caught up with the running kid on the other side, the rest of your class giggling and cackling as katsuki swooped him up with one arm and dangled him upside down while he kicked and swung tiny punches to his abs, katsuki not even flinching.

“do that again and see what happens brat.” he spat, the little kid not having a single care in the world as he giggled with the rest of the class, all of them deviously planning to piss katsuki off as much as possible since his outbursts were just funny.

“okay okay—” you smiled apologetically at him before taking the dangling boy from his arm and setting him back down, fixing over his clothes and backpack before patting his head and standing upright.

“no more running alright?” you placed your hands on your hips. “don’t we wanna see some cute little fishies and butterflies?!”

“yeeeeaaaahhhh!!” the babies cheered excitedly, each of them immediately returning to their designated spots in two lines as you grabbed your line leaders tiny hands and started the walk down the grassy field to the sanctuary.

“lemme help ya with one line baby—” katsuki went to grab one of your line leaders hands until they burst into a crying fit.

“no! no! i wanna hold miss y/n’s hand!”

katsuki’s eyes narrowed. “what’s so bad about me hah?”

“you’re ugly! miss y/n is pretty!”

the rest of the kids ruptured, laughing as katsuki sent death glares to a literal child, about to spout something nasty until his eyes flickered to your pleading face, his muscles instantly relaxing as he casted his gaze to the ground with a grumble.

you giggled and gave him a sweet kiss to his cheek in gratitude, his face flushing as he eyed your deep blue overalls and pinky shirt and the way your sunglasses sat pretty in your hair on top of your head.

“what honey?” you tilted your head.

“none of your business.”

you snickered and nudged your shoulder with his, looking over at milo from somewhere in the line to make sure he was okay before walking up the front gates of the sanctuary.

the wildlife guide met you once you all were cleared and inside the greenhouse, your kids absolutely restless as they ‘listened’ to whatever the guide had to say and just wanting to break free and run around to look at all of the fishies and butterflies like you had promised, and you not even listening either as you drooled over the way katsuki’s muscles looked under his t-shirt.

“any questions sweetheart?”

“huh?” your eyes snapped to the guide, cheeks pink as you quickly shook your head. “oh! no not at all! thank you ma’am!”

“alrighty then! just please make sure to tell your students—”

suddenly your two perfect lines broke apart as the kids started running around and pointing at fluttering butterflies and screaming, the guide looking like she’d seen a ghost as the usual quiet and serene sanctuary was now the epitome of noise.

“i’m sorry! i’m sorry—” you guiltily apologized. “my kids will settle down they’re just excited is all…”

the guide kindly waved you off before walking back to the main office, you turning and expecting to see katsuki standing next to you, but faltering once you saw he was on the other side and pulling one of your kids down that had climbed up the gates of one of the sanctuaries closed off exhibits.

“oh god..” you mumbled, about to make your way over until you spotted milo in a corner alone, staring at one of the koi ponds.

“milo?” you called softly, walking up to him.

your heart sank once he turned and you saw his little tear filled eyes and wobbling lip.

“oh no!” you gasped, crouching down and taking his tiny hands in yours. “what’s wrong my love? are you okay? is it too hot?”

you pushed some of his spiky blonde bangs back from his sweaty forehead as he shook his head.

“i can’t draw!” he sniffled. “and the koi fishies keep moving…”

your shoulders relaxed in relief.

“that’s okay!” you took his journal and pencil, wiping his wet cheeks as you smiled sweetly. “as long as we’re patient with the fishies, they’ll swim back and you can draw them again!”

you opened his journal and flipped to a new blank page, the both of you waiting quietly until a big chubby koi fish swam by.

“there!” milo whispered and pointed, and you quickly drew what you could, just making out the shape of the body before it disappeared again.

“and now we wait!” you grinned up at him. “the fishy will come back around and you’ll be able to draw it again.”

“kayyy!!”

“and you can draw milo. i’ve seen your artwork in class, remember? you always get a gold star!”

he giggled. “i do miss pretty!”

you ran a soothing hand over his back before passing his journal back.

“now you try honey—”

“i love you.”

you froze and looked up, katsuki standing there with a sincere and vulnerable look in his eye.

you stood from your crouched position and looked at him wide eyed.

“i’m not— i’m not good at this kinda shit at all and i always say somethin’ dumb but i do.”

“kats—”

“and i’m sorry it took me so long to say it but i tried to make it obvious with my stupid shaped fruits n’ shit… and i always thought you kinda just knew…”

milo was too busy focusing on catching glimpses of the koi fish to draw with his tongue peeking out to even realize what was going on next to him.

“you’re so patient baby. the way you are with me… the way you are with my kid. i need that in my life and i can’t live without it at this point…” he spoke genuinely. “your fuckin’ fault.”

you giggled and covered your face with your hands, face hot to the touch and bashful at everything he was telling you.

“come here.”

you listened and walked forward, dropping your arms as you wrapped them around his abdomen and his around your head, squishing you in his big chest as he propped his chin up.

“do you love me too or what.” he frowned. “cause if not this is shitty and embarrassing—”

“no i do!” you giggled, pulling away and giving him a cheeky smile. “i do kats you know that… i love you. so much.”

he smiled and pecked your lips. “good, miss pretty.”

katsuki had heard the entire conversation you had with his son, your words seeping with such tenderness and care, and he almost passed the fuck out when he thought about how much of a blessing you were, something he’d be a fool not to snatch up and take as he nearly fucking proposed to you in the middle of the sanctuary like an idiot, not knowing at all how a person that pissed people off for a living was loved by a woman who was the definition of pure.

because how the fuck did an angry dunce like him, get lucky with an angel like you?

“oh my god that dumbass kid is climbin’ the fence again— oi!”

katsuki quickly kissed your cheek before flying to the other side of the sanctuary, you doubling over in laughter as you watched him fight and tug and pull, your student not budging at all whatsoever and the rest of the kids laughing at how red katsuki was getting in the face.

“miss pretty!” milo tugged at your overalls, and you looked down to see him holding up his open journal, a cute wobbly sketch of a koi fish on the page as he smiled big. “i drew it! do you like it?!”

“wow milo!” you gushed, crouching down to his level and taking the journal, examining his artwork. “this is beautiful my love! see? i knew you could do it!”

“thank youuu!” he responded sweetly, his little cheeks blushing as he looked at you like he had another thing he wanted to say.

you tilted your head. “do you wanna tell me something else?”

“yeaaahhh.” he dragged. “please love my dad… i know he’s mean but— but he doesn’t mean it!”

your eyes softened as milo looked down at his shoes.

“and love me too… because i want you to be my new mommy…”

you quickly blinked back tears as to not alarm milo, surprisingly successful at preventing them from slipping down your face.

“i do love your dad honey… and you. the both of you i love so so much.”

he beamed. “really?!”

you nodded, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek. “and i thought i was already your mommy milo!”

the little man gasped and flung his arms around your neck.

“YAAAYYY!” he yelled. “miss pretty is my mommy! i have a mommy now!”

ever since you came into katsuki’s life, his way of living materialized into something completely different.

because now instead of his house being plain and boring and organized from top to bottom without a single thing out of place— it was warm now… happy. and never went a day without smelling like cookies and vanilla as you and katsuki baked with milo any chance you could, set up more pillow forts and tents with starry ceilings, and slept with milo in his room as he snored content in his little bed, you sprawled directly on top of katsuki like he always had you as you both every day intended to leave after putting his son to rest, but ending up falling asleep on the floor each time.

the three of you were a little family.

and katsuki didn’t know why he hated messes so much in the first place.

because mess signified that something had been there, something sunny and tender, something that signified family as you peppered kisses over both your boys’ faces everyday and katsuki drowning you in his rough ones— your man squeezing you so tight all of the time and anywhere, as milo wasn’t just his son now but yours too as you took him to the park or to the aquarium on your days off, the three of you gently living as both of milo’s small hands were occupied now instead of just one.

katsuki’s life looked like it had been generously cherished and lived in for a change.

and katsuki bakugo loved messes.

so as long as they were from you.

taglist!! <33 (THANK YOU THANK YOU!):

@cupcaketeddybehr @soobiary @roachfun @waterfal-ling @saebaey @reneinii @luvvmae @cake-with-the-cream @pixie-dix @2ukika @cramelmacchiao @hy3phiren @umemiaa @wil10wthetree @jameinfrau @pancakeszs @drftnzume @k0z3me @k4zivy @dindjarins1ut @starrnai @tinyray-lovesfood @iloveoldermenn @dazqa @applepi25 @aria-chikage @blu3-l0v3r @rose-tinted-kalopsia @runfrme @unofficialsapphire @dee-writes-anime @megumisluciouslashes @peachyaeger @yourstru1y4ever

Seeing Double - Chapter 4

Pairings - Simon “Ghost” Riley x MacTavish!Reader, Platonic! John “Soap” MacTavish x MacTavish Reader, Platonic! Kyle “Gaz” Garrick x Reader

Summary - it was time to infiltrate, so why did you feel so nervous about something that was your talent

Warnings - flashbacks, mention of torture, blood, nausea, vomit, canon-typical violence, idk reader looking sexy for a mission?

Author’s Note - there is an allusion of rape but it will not happen, I will never write rape or sexual assault for any character. Anyways, part 4, enjoy!

Word Count - 5.1K

Masterlist - Pt.1, Pt.2, Pt.3, pt.5

Your eyes shifted around the dark room. Squinting softly as you studied its walls. A feeling of uneasiness washed over you as you realized where you were. As you stood up to run, rope bids held your ankles and hands back. Your skin tearing as you tried to move.

As you peered down at yourself, bile began to rise in your throat. You were covered in your own blood from head to toe. You could feel the welts and the cuts as they dig into your skin. You were stripped down to your base level of undergarments. 

A man stood over you. His eyes were concealed by the shadows but his body wasn’t. He held something that you couldn’t see, but you heard his voice speak. 

“Solo te voy a preguntar una vez más, Cariña.” I’m only going to ask you one more time sweetheart. He paused to let your eyes meet his. “¿Por qué estás aquí?” Why are you here?

“¿Y si no respondo?” and if I do not answer? You shot back. Glaring at the sick man. 

“Entonces mis hombre te harán responder.” A slimy grin ran over his face “y no les importa tocar tu cara bonita.” then my men will make you respond, and they don’t mind touching your pretty face. 

“Ya te lo dije. Soy periodista y escribo sobre la mala calidad del aqua-” I already told you. I am a journalist here and I write about the poor water quality-

“Mentirosa!” Liar! The man cried as he slapped you. Your face stung but not as much as the rest of your body did so you could ignore it. 

“Es la verdad!” It’s the truth

“Tenemos fotos que sabes.” We have photos you know. The man spoke as he pulled out zoomed in photos of you. You with Los Vaqueros at the bar. You and Rudy together in your room as he- 

You couldn’t bare to look any longer. Bile rising in your throat, coming up to your mouth. 

“¿Cómo se sentiría tu precioso Rodolfo hm? ¿Seguiría queriéndote así? ¿Seguiría queriéndote después de que dejara que mis perros se salieran con tu cuerpo?” How would your precious Rodolfo feel hm? Would he still want you like this? Would he still want you after I let my dogs have their way with your body? He was so close you could smell the beer on his breath. 

“Vete a la chingada” Go fuck yourself. You said right as the vomit left your mouth. The vomit landing right on his face and all over his clothes. The man cried out as he grabbed his own face. Growls being heard around you. Even in your beat up state, a small smile creeped it’s way up. 

“Puta madre!” The man cursed out, suddenly grabbed a knife. “Agárrala” Grab her. Suddenly multiple hands were on your body. Holding you completely still as the knife suddenly came going for your eyes. 

You woke up with a shock as somebody banged on your door. Your jaw loosened as if you were ready to scream as you shot up. Slowly you touch your surroundings as you gather yourself. 

“Yeah?” You called out, slowly making your way to open the door. Ghost’s talk brooding figure looking down at you. Back straightening as you sniffled up your tears. 

“Alejandro says we have help arriving for the mission later. Johnny’s in the shower.” he grunted, you nodded. His lips quivered under his mask as if he wanted to say something but he didn’t. 

“Is that all?” you hummed. The man nodded, maintaining eye contact so as to not look at your body. Noticing how you quickly moved to cover it even though you were in minimal sleep attire. He turned and started walking down the hallway. Your meek voice shooting out, “Ghost?” you said softly. 

“Mm?” the man murmured back. 

“Thank you.” You said. Confusion wiped over his features but you couldn’t see that. He didn’t know what you were thanking him for but he nodded and then turned to walk off. 

Ghost could hear your laughter as you walked behind him with Soap. The three of you made your way to the conference room. He had noticed your distinct change of clothes. You now wore full tactical gear from combat boots, to black pants, and a black tee with a slight turtleneck to hide your claw marks. Ghost stopped just short of the conference room seeing Alejandro and Rudy outside, both of them looking unhappy. 

You walked out from behind Ghost and Johnny. Concern written on your features seeing the anger in Rudy and Alejandro.

“¿Qué pasó?” What’s wrong? You spoke. Before either men could respond a certain texan spoke up.

“Nice to see you again, Banshee.” Graves smirked, “glad to see you found your way back to Las Almas.” 

Ghost took immediate notice of how your body tensed up, it was a full body reaction hidden carefully by your clothes. The lieutenant recognized your body tense as the same one you had when they talked about coming here in the first place. Suddenly the mask slipped over your face again as you turned around, 

“Pleasure to see you again, Graves.” you smiled, taking his hand in a firm shake. The texan’s smirk only deepened as the group filed into the conference room to discuss the mission. You sat on the right side of the table, Rudy snagging a chair to your right and Johnny took one to your left. Alejandro was at the head of the table as Graves sat down and even leaned back in his chair. The texan awfully comfortable for all the tension heating up the room. 

“Tonight we are going to capture El Sin Nombre.” Alejandro spoke. You blinked processing it. “There is a meeting going on tonight where we may also be able to capture the rest of Hassan’s missiles.” 

“I thought we were here for Hassan?” You spoke up.

“El Sin Nombre will lead us to Hassan.” Rudy spoke knowingly.  

“Well Ghost will be playing look out as he is the most experienced sniper, Rudy will also be working on comms.” Alejandro continued and then took a deep breath before he spoke, “Chiqui, we need you to infiltrate with Soap and I”

You nodded, you could understand why it would look good if you came. Women had no problem coming and going from the narcos houses, you wouldn’t be questioned harshly. 

“Ale will be working as a guard, you and Soap will waltz right through the front gates. Soap is posing as a member of The Shadows here to give up Graves’ team since The Shadows have been thwarting Las Almas Cartel’s attempt to get the missiles out of the country. You will be posing as…” 

“Una prostituta?” a prostitute? You questioned, cutting off Rudy but he didn’t mind. A deep feeling settled over you, something you couldn’t quite pin. 

“Sí, we’ve already set up plans so they should be expecting you. They will also be expecting Soap. But we will be there every step of the way.” Alejandro said. 

A wave of nausea rushed over you, this is exactly how it worked last time and you slipped right through their fingers and straight into the hands of the cartel. You swallowed a big lump as you zoned out. Not needing to pay attention to what everyone else was doing as your role weighed heavy on you. Rudy’s knee barely knocked your own to bring you back into focus. 

“Las Almas Cartel has undergone new management so you shouldn’t be recognized.” Rudy whispered to you. The room fell silent as you stared at Graves. 

“So why are you here?” you stated, to everyone else it was a simple curiosity, but Rudy and Alejandro internally tensed at the venom you laced within your look at Graves. 

“Just here on behalf of representing the great states.” he smiled back, “now why are you here? Least I can see the colonel and his sergeant major can speak English just fine, without you.” 

If Rudy and Alejandro were lesser men, without military patience and control, they would have taken turns at tearing Graves apart. Instead, Rudy let his fists clench under the table and Alejandro let out a deep sigh.

“Yes they can, but also I’ve been assigned to the 141, they were sent here, and so I was tasked with joining.” you responded cooly as if you had just told Graves the weather. 

Alejandro dismissed everyone from the meeting with a nod. You were aware of how a certain lieutenant’s eyes studied you as you left. 

Ghost didn’t see you again until that night. Rudy, Graves, Alejandro, and the lieutenant all stood on the roof of the building talking as you and Johnny set up comms in the car. 

You slipped on your heels with a whine as the 4 inch death shoes were pushing your arch up. 

“What happened here two years ago?” Johnny said randomly as you worked to put in the wire on your ear. 

“Nothing Johnny.” you passed it off as you applied lip liner and some gloss. 

“Don’t bullshit me. I’m yer damn brother and yet you’re closer with Ale and Rudy than with me. For Christ's sake I see how you sleep. You claw at your neck and wake up in cold sweats. Something happened here and I have a right to know!” He said, his voice raising a little. You took a deep breath and stared at the ceiling. He extended a hand towards you, his big eyes staring into yours, as he whispered, “Please.”

“I’ll tell you when this is over okay?” You smiled back, tears in your eyes. A knowing look passed between you both as you interlocked pinkies. He was right, you should have told him by now and you never understood why you hadn’t yet. 

“Clock’s ticking.” Ghost chimed in. The man stood next to Rudy as he set up his scope. The lieutenant was itching to ask Rodolfo about you but he just decided to fix his scope. 

“Showtime, Chiqui” Rudy’s voice came through the comms. Alejandro had already disappeared into the night and Graves had left to go scout. Simon grabs a pair of binoculars to look at the entrance. 

Soap was dressed from head to toe in shadow gear as he entered the building first. Suddenly he was grabbed by a man dressed in a cartel uniform with a mask. Soap got ready to fight when Alejandro’s voice whispered “Cálmate.” calm yourself. 

“¿Quién es este cabrón?” Who is this fucker? Came the gruff voice of a guard as Alejandro pushed Soap forward, into the cartel house. The Scotsman allowed himself to be pushed around by the colonel. 

“Está aquí para hablarle al Sin Nombre” He's here to speak to El Sin Nombre. Alejandro nodded and there was a tense moment as Soap was being watched by the cartel men. Until the sound of your heels hit the pavement. Ghost quickly found you within his binoculars and for a mere moment he forgot the circumstances of the occasion. The street lamps illuminating your curves as you walk with the confidence of Aphrodite.

Each step echoed as your four-inch black stilettos hit the ground, your tits bouncing a little with the power of each step. Your hair was styled down and jewelry sparkled in the light. You were dressed in a sleek black cowl-neck mini dress, one with a deep cut in the front, with a sparkling necklace. It was a beautiful lariat necklace with a diamond at the intersection of the y and a small knife dangled at the bottom of the chain. You pulled your hair to the side to show off the back of the dress, or the lack thereof. Your whole back was on display as the fabric barely wrapped around the back of your neck and the bottom barely covered your rear. The bottom of the dress rode up to the tops of your thighs as you gently pulled it down. You were covered in dangly jewelry so you clinked as you walked. You had on a thin layer of sultry make-up, including eyeliner and a deep colored lip gloss. You practically dripped with sex to every man in proximity, including Simon. 

The lieutenant, for the first time ever, regretted being so far from the scene. He also found himself wondering if you smelled just as intoxicating as the night before when he was near you.

“Quite the seductress she is, mm?” Rudy murmured to Ghost, as he noticed the lieutenant tense. He was trying to break the silence by the common thread between the two of you. Sure you and Rudy had a past but he could see that your future lies elsewhere, even if you ignored it so blatantly. 

“I can see why she specializes in infiltration and undercover ops.” Ghost murmured back, passing off the compliment, as you easily passed by the guards, whispering sweet nothings into their ear. You came to the rescue of Ale and Soap quickly. 

“This is her element, her natural habitat” Rudy responded, he had seen this bit before. 

“Hay una problema muchachos?” Is there a problem here, boys? You spoke, your tone sultry as you slowly looked up and down the guards. Your every word being replayed in the comms, including the way you purred to the men. Silence fell over the groups as you held the guards attention, saving your teammates but at the cost of yourself. 

“Solo hay problema si estás aquí por otra persona en lugar de por mí” There 's only a problem if you're here for someone else instead of me. The bodyguard said as he slid over to you, his hand sliding up your inner thigh, the man’s hand sliding dangerously close to your core. You swallowed the feeling of nausea. You smoothly took the man's hand and moved it to your rear instead as you purred to him. Rudy and Ghost watch the scene unfold through the windows.

“Estoy aquí por El Sin Nombre. Pero puedo ahorrarte un beso o dos” I'm here for El Sin Nombre. But I can spare you a kiss or two. You hummed, your hands moving up the man's chest, almost as if you were stroking his ego with your bare hands. Winking at the last bit. None of your english-speaking counterparts were able to tell what was being said, but considering the man wasn’t tense, they all considered you to be doing your job well. 

The man led you to the elevator, letting Alejandro and Soap follow. 

“Tendré que revisarte en busca de armas, por supuesto.” I'll have to check you for weapons, of course. The guard had a slimy tone as he spoke that even Soap and Ghost could pick up on. Rudy suddenly bristled at the words, but sighed in relief seeing you cooly respond without missing a beat.

“Adelante, guapo” Go ahead, handsome. You spread your legs slightly as the man’s hands traveled up and down, over every curve before stopping at your face. The man moving to kiss you as you politely moved to let him kiss your cheek as he kissed your own. 

Ghost felt his left hand tighten over the trigger as he watched the man’s hands trail over your body through his scope. The guard finally relinquished as he let the three of you enter the elevator alone, swiping his key card, giving you access to the second floor. The second the elevator closed you breathed a sigh of relief. 

“Are you armed?” Alejandro questioned. 

“Yeah, wearing two knives on a strap on my thigh” you said as you lifted your dress to adjust the strap where you had sneakily pushed it up earlier right before greeting the guard. 

Ghost had to take a deep breath as the image played in his mind, ‘Get your shit together, Simon’ he growled to himself. The poor man wondered where all these feelings came from. 

You entered the second floor confidently as you were met with the second lieutenant of the cartel and the sicario.

“Finalmente, llega la perra. Me ha estado doliendo la verga toda la noche.” Finally the bitch arrives. My cock has been aching all night. The man groans, adjusting himself, and wastes no time rushing over to you, roughly grabbing your wrist, his intentions clear. 

“Oh, cállate Diego y dale un poco de espacio a la pobre mujer. El hecho de que sea su trabajo no significa que se lo deba.” Oh shut up Diego and give the poor woman some space. Just because it is her job does not mean she owes you it. A voice suddenly spoke. You assumed it was Sicario until you noticed how feminine it was. That was when Valeria stepped forward.

“No mames.” No way. Rudy muttered. Alejandro stiffened but didn’t say a word. If Valeria recognized you, she did not show it in any manner. You never met the woman but Alejandro had mentioned her in passing at times. 

“Yo estoy aquí por El Sin Nombre, no por ti.” I am here for El Sin Nombre, not you. You spoke as you stepped out of his grasp. Valeria smiled as she looked at you.

“Entonces estarías aquí para mí, princesa” Then you would be here for me, princess. Valeria smirked as she stepped forward. Valeria looked at her lieutenant and smirked, a hand waving off to dismiss him, the man only leaving

“¿Tú eres El Sin Nombre?” You're El Sin Nombre? You clarified. The woman nodded. The two of you forgot about the men surrounding you as Alejandro cleared his throat.

“¿Y para qué está aquí?” and why is he here? Valeria pointed to Soap, her hand trailed up your back as her hands found your scars. She turned and finally recognized you. She froze for just for a moment but that was all you needed. That’s when all hell broke loose. You swiped out your right leg and brought the woman to her knees, your arms quickly pinning her wrists. 

“Ale, ahora!” Ale, now! You yelled as she thrashed. Alejandro quickly came to put the cloth against her face as her eyes frantically looked between the both of you. A knowing look of recognition glazed over her eyes right before her eyelids fluttered shut. The woman going limp in your arms. 

“We got her, let’s go.” Soap reported over the coms. Rudy quickly packed up his gear as Graves spoke over the radio. 

“Shadows are coming any minute now. I’m around the corner waiting. Get over to us, quickly!” 

Johnny slid you his spare gun as Diego quickly came out of his room at the commotion. So much for stealth you said as you quickly grabbed a knife from your garter and nailed it between the mans eyes, His body crumbling quickly as you walked over to collect your knife. Alejandro binded Valeria’s hands and feet and then threw her over your shoulder. 

“Que haces?” What are you doing? Alejandro barked as you bent over to rip off your heels. 

“My heels will give away our position.” You seethed back. 

“Too late for that.” Soap said as more guards came from the elevator. You and your brother quickly picking them off.  You all easily slipped out of the back way, your heels in your left and your gun in your right. The street lamps were dimmer at the back of the house but still laid a clear path through the city. 

You ignored how the ground began to pain your feet as you ran barefoot, the three of you ran in a line. You were at the front, Alejandro in the middle, Johnny in the back

A van suddenly drove in front of you and you held up a gun as the back doors flung open. Ghost suddenly grabs you as Rudy helps Alejandro. His strong arms around your waist disappearing just as quickly as they were there. You turned around just in time to help Johnny up as the doors slammed closed. You quickly found a spot beside Ghost, Johnny sitting on your other side. A soft silence took over the group. Small conversation between Rudy and Alejandro brought some relief. 

“Ye turn into Cinderella?” Soap smiled as he referred to your shoes. 

“Maybe.” You smiled back. You bent over again to put them back on, a quiet whine passed your lips as the arch of your foot was stretched out again.

Ghost was silent as he finally saw the outline of scars on your back. He didn’t say a word as he recognized the soft lines as previously healed lacerations from an object striking your skin. 

Johnny noticed them too but had a different reaction. A quick breath in was taken but he didn’t say a word as he exchanged a glance with his lieutenant. 

You leaned back and took a deep sigh as you moved your garter down and took out the two knives. Even as the van turned you still flipped one of the throwing knives between your fingers. Your brain still recounting the events as it played through your head. 

“Why’s Cinderella so bad at football?” Ghost murmured to you. You peered up at him, a curious look as you responded. 

“Beats me.” 

“She always runs away from the ball.” 

A quiet chuckle passed through your lips as you leaned back fully. A sleepy feeling overcoming your body as you let it take you, a little nap couldn’t hurt right? 

Ghost was tense for the rest of the ride as your head lay on his shoulder. He wasn’t going to move an inch even as the three men stared at you and him. You were completely relaxed as if you were in a queen bed and not resting your head on the massive boulder of muscle that Ghost called his right shoulder. The softness of your features juxtaposed your outfit and the demeanor it was supposed to give you.

While Johnny was shocked to see you sleeping on his lieutenant, he wasn’t going to complain. For once, you weren’t clawing at your skin or sweating like you had a fever. Even if you found comfort in a man who scared the shit out of everyone, maybe that was what you needed. To feel safe, guarded. 

The lurch of the van suddenly stopping woke you up. Your body whipped up and tensed again as you woke. Your hand gripping the gun like you were ready to snap. 

Everyone quietly walked into the safe house as a chair was set up to put Valeria on in the interrogation room. 

Graves was watching you like a hawk as Rudy handed you a change of clothes when you made your way to the bathroom. 

By the time you had gotten back the interrogation had started. 

“Alright. How do you know eachother?” Graves barked out as you stood by the door. You wouldn’t enter, not just yet. 

“Know is a strong word.” Came Alejandro’s response 

“Las palabras fuertes son importantes. Nuestra palabra es nuestro valor, ¿no?” Strong words are important. Our word is our worth, right?

“Vete a la verga, hija de puta. Que te voy a matar!” Go to hell, you son of a bitch. I’m going to kill you! Alejandro suddenly lunged and you saw Rudy and Soap grab him. Rudy slowly got him to calm down 

“Hola Chiqui.” Valeria's clipped response, ignoring the rage of her old comrade. The woman quickly noticing you even though you had changed out of your clothes, jewels, and taken off your makeup. 

“Hola Valeria, are you going to tell them how you know Ale or am I going to have to?” You said as you slowly approached her.

“Vamos, tell them.” Alejandro growled.

“I don’t take orders anymore. Even the dogs at Las Almas know not to bark at me.” Valeria quipped back before you slowly approached her. 

“Bueno, entonces, ¿podría decirles a mí? Me lo debes a mí, teniendo en cuenta a quién sirves ahora” Well then could you tell them, for me? You owe it to me considering who you serve now. You said as you met her gaze. A look passed between you, the woman knew exactly what you were referring to and sympathy passed over her gaze. 

“Sabes que yo no te hice” You know that I didn’t do that to you.

“Pero aún así dejas que sus perros te laman la palma de la mano” But yet you let his dogs lick your palm. You growled to her, your gaze was harsh on her. 

“Different squads, same unit. You were the wild ones, huh “los vaqueros”.” Valeria spoke to Graves and then she peered to you, “and you were there little translator hm?” A silence passed over the group as the woman continued.

“My squad was clean cut, seńoras y señores, everyone respected each other and nobody crossed any lines-” 

“Until the raid on the son of La Araña. ¿Te acuerdas?” Do you remember? Alejandro spoke, cutting off the woman abruptly. 

“Why’re you doin’ this?” Graves spoke, cutting off the interaction. 

“You tell me... you're the contractor, no? What you don't do, your competitors will.” Valeria spoke. Ghost’s deep voice cut through the conversation as he spoke. 

“You're a narco, harboring a terrorist…” 

“Terrorism is good for business. It's insurance.” 

“What the fuck does that mean?” Alejandro spit out, anger evident in his tone. 

“¿Puedes sacar la puta cabeza del culo por un segundo? Puta madre, Alejandro.” Can you get your fucking head out of your ass for a second? For fuck's sake, Alejandro. Valeria sneered, the room heating up just before Graves moved a hand over Valeria’s shoulder, calming her.

“As long as there is a war on terror, there will be no real war on drugs. To find your so-called terrorist, and your missiles, you need me. To prevent bloodshed.” Valeria said, her tone indicating exactly what she wanted. 

“No, I'm not doing this…” Alejandro growled. Alejandro picked up his weapon and started to leave, Rudy’s hand catching his arm to stop him. 

“Doesn't change anything.” Johnny said. Alejandro whipped around to your brother, his face seething anger.

“It changes everything! Fuck! Don't make a deal with her, it never ends well. Just ask your sister.” Alejandro said, his gaze shifting to you as he stormed out. Johnny froze before approaching you in front of Valeria. 

“Looks like it's your turn to tell the truth.” You spoke, ignoring the comment. 

“I want the missiles, I want the target, and I want Hassan. And you've got ten seconds or I'm gonna show you the difference between the military and me.” Graves spoke, looking down at the woman. 

“I don't know the targets. I'm a courier. I move things. I can tell you where to find the missiles. When you return, I'll tell you where Hassan is. In exchange, you will let me go. And get the fuck out of Las Almas. Se me largan ya- “ Now leave. 

Soap looks at Ghost and Rodolfo, before nodding at Graves. Everyone left the room and as the door closed you heard Graves spoke. 

“Deal. Until then... you're stayin' right here.” 

Johnny immediately grabbed you as you walked out.

“What the hell happened, huh?” Johnny said, following you as you walked towards the van. In a moment of anger, and possibly catharsis, you told him the truth. 

“Valeria made a deal with the narcos behind our backs. I was kidnapped and tortured for a week before Rudy and Alejandro found me and saved me. I was transferred back to the US the second I recovered, that’s all.” You said. All of the men froze as you said it. Johnny’s gaze softened as he let you go.

You entered the van with a sigh. Taking a moment to breathe deeply. Your hands coming up to hold your face as you felt hot tears pool in your eyes. You knew it would be hard telling him but you wished you had told him when you were calmer, not in the heat of the moment when tensions were high.

Ghost lit a cigarette outside as he pulled his mask up to his lips, deeply inhaling the tobacco. He knew it was hard for you here, he glanced at your file but that part was conveniently left out. Your file said you left on the reason of pure reassignment. He watched Johnny slowly enter the van.

“I dinnae know.” Johnny said as he slid beside you. 

“I know Johnny.”

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?” 

“How the hell was I supposed to? Should I have just waltzed up and said Hey Johnny sorry I’ve been gone for two years but now I’m back after being tortured and nearly raped by a cartel in Mexico but I missed you!” You shot back.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered. 

“I know you are.” 

“I’m here now.” Johnny spoke, his hand reached out to take one of yours. 

“Took ya long enough.” You shot back. The man chuckling as everyone else joined you in the vehicle.

You lost track of everything going on and before you knew it, you were in a car with Ghost, Johnny, and Alejandro driving back to base. The car in front of you, containing Graves and his shadows, stopped at the entrance of the base. The rain poured hard onto the car as you got an uneasy feeling. Everyone got out of the car. You stood next to Alejandro. Ghost and Johnny behind you

“What's this?” Alejandro barked out. The rain is coming down harder now. 

“This is the immediate future. Step away from the gate.” Graves said, the look he gave you made you uneasy. 

“What?” Johnny said, confusion surrounding your face. 

“You heard me.” Graves spoke again. 

“You're crazy, this is my base.” Alejandro said, the disbelief evident. 

It's not a base. This is a sizable covert facility and I admire it- So, I'm taking it. You boys have been relieved. Thank you for your service.” Graves said, the uneasy feeling quelling over as you realized what was happening.

“No, no, no, I don't take orders from you.” Alejandro growled.

“Didn't Valeria say that? Now that makes me wonder what else I don't know about your affiliation with a drug lord?” Graves spoke again, taunting the man. Alejandro stepped forward..

“What the fuck did you just say to me, pendejo…” Alejandro said, you came out from behind him, and put your hand on the Mexican’s chest, putting yourself in the middle to make space. 

“You're out of line, Graves.” came your voice, calm and easy. 

“Don't do that. Don't... do that. No one needs to get hurt here, sweetheart.” Graves responded to you. 

“Are you threatening us?” Ghost spoke up, feeling how nasty this was about to get. 

“Soldier, I don't make threats. I make guarantees. So let's not do this.” The texan spoke, looking across the group. 

“I’m calling Shepard.” Soap said, turning around and walking back to the car. 

“General Shepard sends his regards.” Graves spoke, a chill running down your spine, “He told me y’all wouldn’t take this well, especially you, sweetheart.” 

“He knows about this?” Ghost spoke up, gripping his gun as he turned sideways to Johnny. The Scotsman now looked worriedly at how close you were to the texan. 

“He's put me in command of this operation from here on out. So, y'all need to stand down. It's time to let the pros finish this.” Graves said, stepping forward.

“Graves you don’t have to do this.” You spoke out, pleading with your eyes.

“And why the hell are we talking like this is some kind of a negotiation? It's not. I've got my orders and now you have yours.” He shot back. 

“And who the fuck do you think you are, cabrón? My men are inside!” Alejandro yelled. 

“I'm afraid not. Your men have been... detained.” Graves said, smirking. Just as Alejandro lunged forward, you pushed him out of the way. A shadow pushed you against the vehicle and you felt zip ties quickly enclosing your wrists. 

“Get your fucking hands off of me!” You shouted, thrashing against the vehicle. Alejandro was slammed beside you, a soldier detained him as well. The sound of gunfire filling the night air. The last thing you heard was Johnny shouting your hand and Graves whispering as the world went black. 

“Too bad you couldn’t save them with your screams this time, Banshee.”

Author’s Note - uh-oh…

bleeding blue | apocalypse au

part twenty-eight —other parts

pairing: Simon “Ghost” Riley x fem!reader words: 4.4k tags: death. blood. cannibalism mention. zombies of course. AFAB reader. single dad ghost. there will be sex!!! SEX. enemies to lovers. summary: After losing your companions, you run into a skull-masked man and his daughter. They are your last hope for survival.

France feels just as haunted by ghosts, the kind that cling to silence.

The next morning, you follow the road south near the Belgium border under a punishing sun and suffocating humidity. Sweat pools under your clothes as you leave the coastline behind, passing overgrown rose bushes and grand estates crumbling to rotted beams. Without the raft or truck, supplies rest on everyone's backs, lighter now with all the food you’ve already gone through—a stark reminder that you’ll need more soon.

You were the last to wake, stirred from a deep sleep by the sounds of bags being packed. It shouldn’t be surprising—you’d slept well after two orgasms. It’s a miracle the night’s events didn’t spill into your dreams, but now, in the daylight, keeping them at bay is harder. Thankfully, Kyle and the two kids create a buffer as you all follow Price’s lead. Their presence helps keep your eyes from drifting to him. You force your gaze on the passing signs, making a mental game out of trying to pick up on some French. It's distracting enough. So far you've gathered that sortie means exit and allez means something like go. 

The first break comes when your shoulders burn from the weight of the backpack, the straps biting into your skin. You slip it off with a groan, sinking to the ground, and nurse the canteen of water. Just enough to wet your throat and keep the dizziness at bay—rationing is a habit.

Price's plan echoes in your head: Méteren by nightfall. That’s ten hours of walking, minimum. Your toes throb at the thought, each step promising fresh blisters, but you force yourself to focus. The faster you reach Switzerland, the safer you’ll all be. If the place they heard of is actually waiting there.

"Hey. Do you want this?"

Blue lowers beside you, offering a near-empty jar of peanut butter she was snacking on.

"Not much left but it's really good," she shrugs. 

"I'll finish it off, thanks."

The salty taste is not exactly refreshing, but you choke it down anyway, the boost of protein more of a necessity than a pleasure. Blue pulls at the grass beside you, her gaze drifting to Ari, who’s sharing food with Kyle. You try not to look, but your eyes flick to Ghost anyway.

The mask is still on, as always. Why is he obsessed with it, even after you just saw him naked? Despite its presence, you can still see the furrow between his brows as he pores over the map with Price. Sweat rings the collar of his black tee, and his biceps flex as he gestures down the road. You’re definitely checking him out when he catches your eye mid-conversation, adjusting his mask, and without missing a beat, you turn your attention back to Blue.

She is staring at you, her brow furrowed.

You instinctively touch your neck, your thoughts racing to the bruise hidden beneath your hair. 

“Do you think he likes him?” she asks abruptly.

You blink. “What?”

“Ghost,” she whispers, leaning closer. “Do you think he likes Ari?”

Relief floods you. “Oh. I mean, sure. He's a good kid.”

“He’s not a kid,” she corrects with a huff. “He’s thirteen.”

“That’s still a kid, Blue.”

She rolls her eyes but hesitates before adding quietly, “He kissed me.”

Your jaw nearly drops. “What?”

“Shh! Keep your voice down. And don’t tell Ghost.” She pinches your arm, her cheeks reddening.

“I won’t,” you assure her. “But… when? How?”

“The other night, when we kept watch. Just on my cheek, but still.” She pulls her knees to her chest. “He's cute. I think I like him, but… what if he doesn’t actually like me? What if he just sees me as a kid?”

Her uncertainty tugs at something deep in you. “Have you talked to him about it?”

She shakes her head, looking horrified. “No way. What if he doesn't feel the same? It could get weird.”

“Then kill him,” you deadpan. At her glare, your lips twitch. “Fine, I’ll kill him.”

She snorts despite herself. “Be serious.”

“Okay, how about this—just ask him, ‘Why did you kiss my cheek?’ Keep it simple.”

Blue considers this, her expression softening. “I could do that. But it has to be when Ghost isn’t around. Which is almost never.”

You're telling me. You pick at your nails, avoiding her trusting gaze as your chest tightens. 

The sound of Price's boots back on the gravel ends the break.

Even after the brief rest, your limbs drag with exhaustion for the next few hours, but the extra calories push you forward. You make it to Méteren before nightfall. As the guys pitch tents, you rip off your socks to survey the damage. Open blisters stare back at you. With only so much gauze in your kit, you've been hesitant, but you cut a conservative strand and wrap up your heels. 

Behind a bush, you change from your sweaty clothes and hope there is freshwater somewhere to wash them in the morning. You dab a rag with a bit of water from the canteen and scrub the biggest offenders; armpits, between your legs, the back of your neck. Changing into a clean shirt, the sound of them unpacking the sleeping bags beckons your heavy shoulders and sore legs. You head back to the tents, ready for sleep, when you overhear Ghost volunteer for first watch.

"Twix will help me."

You hope the surprise isn't visible on your face as you nearly drop your backpack, swinging your gaze at him.

"I will?"

"It's been a few days since you've taken watch."

Your lips roll together then flatten, shoving down the blush that crawls your neck at the thought of being alone with him. Kyle looks like he is ready to take your place, but you nod in resignation, clear your throat, and finish tugging on the zipper over your clothes. "Yeah, of course. I'll help."

The others disappear into the tents, and you turn to sit on a fallen log, bow in hand. But before you can settle, you feel his presence—a shift in the air just behind you, then the solid pressure of his hand curling around your forearm. Without a word, he guides you forward, pulling you with an ease that leaves no room for hesitation. Your body moves instinctively as he leads you out of earshot of the tents, behind an abandoned car. It is now you realize he's changed into a black hoodie and shedded the tactical vest. He leans his rifle against the side of the car and looks down at you, saying nothing for a few seconds.

"Did you take away my chance to sleep and pull me over here just to stare at me?" you whisper, arms crossing against the gentle breeze that has cooled with the fallen sun.

He exhales through his nose before responding. "About yesterday."

You blink at him, hoping you don't fail at hiding how even the mere mention sets your nerves alight. "What about it?"

The way his eyes move slowly over your face suggests he is searching for the words. Finally, he says flatly, "It was just fucking. A distraction."

"A distraction," you repeat slowly under your breath. The bluntness hits you harder than expected. You bite the corner of your cheek, a bit too hard, and you narrow your eyes. "You really think I don't already know that?"

His broad shoulders roll back in a shrug and his tone shifts far too casual for your liking. "I just didn't want you getting the wrong idea."

The wrong idea. You rip your gaze away, scraping your fingertips into your arm, before looking back at him with a forced shrug of your own. "I can handle fucking, Simon. Like I said, I'm a big girl."

There is an audible inhale, then a low chuckle rumbles in his throat as he leans in, his darkened eyes locking onto yours. He cages you in with his arms, the familiar heat radiating from his touch and already making your brain fuzzy. His hand slides to the back of your neck, guiding you onto your toes as he tears off the mask and lays it on the hood of the car. The glimpse of his strong jaw and the flick of his tongue wetting his lips sends a shiver through you despite the lingering irritation at his words. 

"Yes. You are," he murmurs, his voice rough and low, before capturing your mouth with his in a kiss that feels like the deep, soothing release of sinking into warm water after aching for relief.

You could kiss him for hours, you quickly realize, pleasantly fascinated by how hot and demanding his tongue feels against your mouth. He tastes like how he smells. Pine and salt. You submit to the pace of his lips, every graze of his teeth making your heart thicken. You move your hands through his hair, scratching his scalp, pulling him closer.

"There's something I need," he mumbles, voice etched with a tremble of impatience, and his fingers clench your shirt. With his other hand, he blindly reaches for the car door and forces the rusted thing open with a few tugs. 

"What do you need?" you breathe out, secretly thrilled that he wants you, again, even when it's been only twenty-four hours since he last had you. The mutual desire erodes the fatigue in your limbs and awakens your arousal. 

Without an answer, he spins your bodies, easing into the passenger seat, then pulls you in with him, closing the door with a soft click. The position is awkward at best—your head bumps into the roof, one knee wedged painfully into the center console from the lack of space. The car smells like stale leather and dust, but thankfully not like rot. It's far from enticing, but none of that matters when he forces the seat to recline, creating just enough room for you to lay on top of him.

You can feel him, hot and straining within his jeans, as you kiss him again and begin to move your hips instinctively. It is a thrilling notion, that you have made him hard so quickly, and you wonder if he ever touched himself like you did, stroking his cock with a callused hand that he imagined as you. The image of it, in combination with the friction on your pussy, has you greedily reaching to undo his belt buckle. 

He breaks from your lips with a grunt and grabs your wrist. "Not that."

Huh?

You don't have the chance to question him before the notch in his throat bobs, and he begins unzipping your jeans, instead. "My face. Sit on it." 

The blush on your cheeks is hidden in the car's small, dark space. His half-lidded gaze lifts to yours, and you nod absently before helping him push your pants and underwear to your ankles, shifting awkwardly to discard them to the floor. His hand immediately moves between your bodies, his fingers brushing against your wetness with a sharp inhale. It should make you embarrassed, but it doesn’t—not with the way he watches you, his other hand peeling off your shirt, the whites of his eyes flashing over your naked body with such unabashed hunger that you realize it must’ve been simmering in him for as long as it has in you.

Again, you're the only one undressed. His hands knead the plush of your ass, the massage of your sore glutes drawing a moan from you. He pushes you up his chest and you move your knees, until his face is level with your cunt, nose caressing your throbbing clit. You have to grip the headrest of the backseat to keep yourself steady, neck craned. His palms cup the backs of your thighs, keeping them apart. 

He's already put his mouth on you, but for some reason, this time feels more vulnerable. You become unconsciously alert of the fact you are not the girl you used to be, the one who shaved every inch of her body before going on a date, and scrubbed her skin with perfumed body wash. You have been sweating all day in the French humidity, and not a single part of you is hairless. When he attempts to pull you to his mouth, you resist with a wiggle of your hips.

"You don't—we don't have to do this, you know. I mean, I haven't shaved in years and—"

He bites your thigh. "Stop talking."

"Ghost, I'm disgusting."

His brows furrow, confused, before he exhales a soft laugh, breath fanning your cunt. "I don't care."

You writhe. "No, seriously—"

"I'm a big boy, Twix," he throws back you.

His tone is final, and with that, he ignores your protests and tightens his hands on you, pulling you to sit on his jaw. His tongue licks a bold stripe from hole to clit, then back down to your hole, where he swirls it a few times before pushing in. Your mouth hangs open in a silent surrender. It is you at his mercy now. His mouth feels even hotter on your cunt for some reason, causing your head to lull forward because of the ceiling, hair dangling. 

Your nails scrape into the leather. His tongue fucks you, nursing the sore flesh that his cock had stretched. He pushes you down with more force, and meets the juncture of your thighs with an arch of his neck, pressing his face deeper. There is a small worry that he might not be able to breathe, but it is erased when his tongue visits your clit with a heady groan, the vibrations of his vocal chords making your muscles flinch. He circles it with a light pressure. You reach down to grip his hair, silently demanding more. He listens, pressing his tongue harder.

"Fucking... yeah, like that."

One of his hands glides up your stomach and squeezes your breast. He keeps sucking, toiling with your puckered nipple at a similar pace. Despite the uncomfortable position, your hips buck and thrash. Your hand slaps against the window as he makes a sloppy mess out of you. The overgrown stubble on his jaw scrapes between your tightened thighs and the sting adds to the overwhelming sensations. You attempt to lift off, seeking a break, but he growls and strikes your ass, forcing you back down.

He licks at you expertly, as if having figured you out in just a few minutes. You screw your eyes shut, a small but swift orgasm rolling through you when you hear him slurp at your folds. He gathers it with a sweep of his tongue, humming. The aftermath leaves your trembling, breath jagged, as a larger one grows towards release.

"Been thinking about that all day," he whispers against you, continuing his ministrations. "Got another one for me?"

His tone feels mocking and desperate at once. Your nails press painfully into the condensation-painted glass. Your other hand fists back in his hair, curling and uncurling, but there is no point in trying to fight it, not when he parts your cunt with his fingers so he can lick more of it. You cum again, harder, almost convulsing as your head bangs upward. It feels never-ending, your moans uncontrollable. He laps you through it, even more relentless, drawing the pleasure for a near-minute, until your lungs can hardly function and you feel like you might collapse.

Your body is pliant and jelly-like when it finally fades. He takes hold of your waist to keep you upright, and pulls his mouth away with a dribble of leakage down his chin. Already, you know it will be impossible to forget that sight, his eyes dazed as if he is the one who just came twice. 

His touch turns somewhat tender when he helps you back down to his lap. He doesn't bother wiping the obscenity from his mouth when he kisses the corner of your lips, firmly, then helps you slip back into your clothes since your brain doesn't seem to have full control over your limbs yet. It's when you place a hand on his thigh to shimmy on your jeans that you feel a distinguishable wet spot.

He finished, too.

The discovery makes your chest swell, and you nibble at your lip as you finish changing. 

"Thanks," you whisper to him. 

He doesn't say anything. He keeps the seat reclined and allows you to lay limp against him, feeling the uneven pace of his heart that matches your own. Clearly, he is a man of his word. This will not be a one time thing, even if it is just fucking. You sigh in sheer exhaustion from the day's activities, unable to ignore the weight in your eyelids as you inhale the residual musk in the air between your bodies. His chest feels firm and warm, a decent place to rest your head, and you think you feel a touch caress your hair. 

You are supposed to be staying up to keep watch, but he doesn't seem ready to move you. Somewhere between wondering how long you can keep this hidden from Blue, and dreading how far you will have to walk again tomorrow, you drift to sleep.

When morning arrives, you are not curled up in a car, but tucked in a sleeping bag. 

Ghost must've put you here, but you have no recollection of it, squinting your eyes against the harsh incoming of sunlight through the nylon walls. Nereida is in the bag beside you, not Blue, which offers a thread of relief. You carefully extricate yourself without waking her and join an awakened Price and Kyle for breakfast.

This morning feels slower than the last. Satisfied with the distance covered yesterday, Price is content with just making it to a town called Englos today. Then, you can focus on replenishing food and water during the evening. 

Your energy is replenished with tomato soup and stale crackers. Blue sits with Ari to eat, and you casually glance at her, but she gives you a subtle shake of her head. No, she hasn't talked to him yet. You offer a small, forced smile and look away.

The day's journey begins after what you would guess is around 8 am. As you walk, you redo your braids, tucking the strands into place so they don't stick to your forehead. Kyle falls in step beside you in comfortable silence, while Ghost moves to the front of the group. He treats you exactly as before—offering only the rare glance of acknowledgment. As if you hadn't just sat on his face last night. As if he hadn't ate you out like you were a source of sustenance.

Though, you’re grateful for his distance. It makes it easier to stay discreet. If he were to look at you too long, you might give yourself away.

It's just fucking.

Nothing but small towns and sprawling fields surrounds you. You pick up a few more words of French and think back to how your parents took you here, but never to the countryside. It's beautiful. Picturesque, even, except for the occasional skeleton tucked between ambery stalks of wheat. You pass through a place called Bailleul, where the remaining buildings remind you of England, when you spot black graffiti inked on a small clock tower.

N'allez pas à Fleurbaix.

"Allez means go," you murmur, stepping over some broken glass. "So what does n'allez pas mean..."

"Picking up a new language?"

You swing your head at Kyle, blinking, and he chuckles lightly at your reaction. 

"Yeah. I thought it might come in handy when chatting with the thriving local population."

He shakes his head in amusement. "Have you been here before?"

"When I was a kid. Once to Paris, and once to a ski resort."

"Ah. So you were one of those kids."

You frown. "What kids?"

"The kids who had money to go skiing."

You shrug, thinking back. "I mean, we weren't rich by any means. Just comfortable."

He nods, the companionable silence resuming as you replay the graffitied words in your head. N'allez pas must mean do not go. Do not go to Fleurbaix. You are about to ask Kyle if that is where you are headed when he speaks first.

"Are we good, Twix?"

His question throws you off guard. You make eye contact and he raises an expectant brow as if he is referring to something...

Right. He kissed you. It feels like forever ago since it happened, but it was only a week maybe. The memory almost makes you cringe, especially in comparison to what you've done with Ghost the past two days.

"Yeah," you dismiss breathily. "Yeah, of course. We're good."

He seems genuinely relieved by your answer, smiling with a sliver of teeth. "Good. I'm glad. I was an idiot and not in the right headspace. But still, I'm sorry I made you uncomfortable. I've been trying to give you space."

"It's fine, honestly," you tell him. "We are all under a lot of stress."

He releases a breath, then brushes a shoulder against yours. "So we're friends, you and I? Or something like that."

You nod with a little laugh, shifting the backpack. "Something like that. By the way, do you know if we are going by a place called—"

"Gaz. Come here for a moment," Ghost calls.

His tone is abrupt, causing everyone to halt. Without question, Kyle jogs over, his boots scraping against the gravel as he moves toward Ghost, who is crouched on one knee, fingers brushing over the matted grass at the side of the road. You squint, trying to figure out what’s caught their attention, and step closer to get a better look.

"A lot of them," Kyle says quietly, his palm pressing gently into the flattened vegetation. Now, you can see it—clear signs of something recently passing through. The ground is torn up, the plants bent and trampled. "It can't have been long ago," he adds, frowning as he observes the damage.

Ghost doesn't look up as he responds. "A horde went through here. Maybe in the last day." He inhales the humid breeze, and shifts his gaze toward Price. "I can smell them from the east."

"We could run right into them if we keep following the D231," Price mutters, drumming his fingers on the rear of his gun. He glances at the nearest road signs, then unfolds the map. "We could shift west for a few kilometers, through Fleurbaix, then cut back toward Englos."

"I just saw something that warned against going to Fleurbaix," you speak up, thumbing the belt loop in your jeans as you look between them.

Ghost's brow rises. You ignore the nerves that prickle your cheeks beneath his stare. 

"I mean, there are signs saying keep out of everywhere by now," Kyle reasons. "That's probably from the start of the infection."

"It's either Fleurbaix, or risk a run in with the horde," Ghost says.

You nod, more so to yourself, and murmur under your breath. "Fleurbaix it is, then."

Bailleul fades at your backs as you keep moving.

The scent of Greys lingers in the shifting air, but it is difficult to detect amid the strong aroma of flowers that pop up in every shade, replacing the fields of wheat. Roses, violets, and some yellow one you don't recognize ornate the rolling hills for as far as you can see. The buildings turn more upright, strong stone that has yet to falter from neglect. You keep reading the signs, even though you don't have the map to refer to, and your spine tightens when you read Fleurbaix: 1 km. 

You unsling your bow without thinking, tapping your nails against the wood.

The road becomes a bit windier as it cuts through some small farms. You even spot a few cows roaming the overgrown pastures which Blue seems curious by. You notice more painted words on the sides of the homes: Nous devons expier nos péchés. It repeats a few times, but you fail to translate it. The only part that clicks is nous, which you think means we.

We something... something...

After crossing a small bridge over a dried creek bed, you excuse yourself to relieve your bladder.

"Keep going, I'll catch up."

You step over what looks like a metal dog chain left on the road and situate yourself between a tree and old BMW. Squatting burns your thighs, and reminds you of your dried cum on them that you've tried, yet failed, to completely wipe off. You clench your teeth as you pee, when there is a sudden sound behind you that makes you flinch, and you quickly zip back up before whirling around. A rat—your shoulders sink. It sits up on its hind legs and stares at you with beady eyes.

"I guess I'm just jumpy sometimes, little guy," you whisper, leaning in. "You would be, too, if you've had to deal with what I have." The rat doesn’t blink. "Right. Well, I’m sure Ghost would think this is incredibly sexy—me having a talk with a rodent."

You sigh, watching him scurry away, but then another rat scurries over your boot. You jerk back, gaze following its direction to an old building—a schoolhouse or chapel, judging by the circular stained-glass window below the roof. Beautiful shrubs lines the sides, seemingly well-kept. The door hangs ajar, with more vermin pouring out in an endless line.

"Jesus. Quite a lot of friends you have, huh?"

You glance down the road. The others are still close but walking ahead. You should catch up. It's not safe alone. But against your better judgment, you step toward the door, pushing it open. Rats scatter underfoot as a thick, rancid smell hits you. Death—fresh and cloying, even more so than the flowers.

Blood streaks the stone floor inside, pooling where vermin feast. Splintered pews lead to an altar. You freeze, taking it all as the color drains from your face. Lying there ceremoniously is what's left of a body, hardly recognizable—ribs torn through flesh, a dangling optic nerve, a mangled groin. A plethora of bite marks cleave through the remains. Bile rises in your throat as the sound of gnawing echoes through against the sun-lit walls.

But what truly grips you is the writing, in blood, draped over a small cross.

Nous devons expier nos péchés.

You whip around and run, the door closing heavily behind you.

"Simon!" His name claws up your throat.

Spicy Curry (Bakugou Katsuki x F!Reader) Chapter 7

Summary: Pro-hero DynaMight hides his developing hearing loss from the public. He doesn’t want them or the villains to know about what he considers his only weakness. His family knows. His best friends know. And now you, the owner of his favorite little curry shop, know. You want to live a quiet life & to protect your son. The last thing you want is to draw attention to yourself. You hide your identity, you hide your scars, and you hide your quirk. And then Bakugou, Katsuki walks in one day with dried blood on his ears, and you can’t help but help him.

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Parts:  1  |  2  |  3 | 4 | 5  |  6  | 7 | ? ? ?

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Content Warning: This fic will contain mentions of past abuse from a “partner”, including sexual assault.

The bell above the door chimed as Katsuki and Kouichi entered the shop, the familiar scent of curry spices wrapping around them like a welcome. But instead of the usual calm atmosphere, they walked into controlled chaos. Nearly every stool at the counter was occupied, customers' chopsticks clicking against bowls as steam rose in fragrant clouds from their curry. Only two seats remained open in the far corner, tucked away from the main bustle. The tiny kitchen behind the counter was alive with motion as you moved between multiple pots, your hair escaping its neat bun in wisps that clung to your damp forehead.

The sight of you like this made something twist in Katsuki's chest. He'd grown used to seeing you in quieter moments, when the shop felt like a sanctuary from the world outside. Now, watching you navigate the cramped space with practiced efficiency, he found himself studying the fluid grace of your movements, the way you anticipated each customer's needs before they spoke, how naturally you maintained your composure even as chaos swirled around you. It reminded him, oddly enough, of watching seasoned pros work a crisis - that same economy of motion, that instinct born from years of experience.

Kouichi immediately bounced toward the counter, waving his hands to catch your attention, his small body practically vibrating with excitement. When you didn't look up, focused on a pot threatening to boil over, he tapped the counter rhythmically - your agreed-upon signal when he needed you urgently.

You glanced up, and Katsuki caught the flash of relief in your eyes at seeing them safe. But your attention was immediately pulled away by the overflowing pot. "Just a minute, baby," you signed quickly, one-handed while adjusting the heat. A customer at the far end raised his empty glass, and you moved to refill it, narrowly avoiding collision with another patron reaching for napkins.

The dinner rush had clearly hit harder than usual. Katsuki's enhanced observation skills, honed through years of hero work, picked up the subtle signs of strain – the slight tremor in your hands as you ladled curry, the way your shoulders tensed with each new demand for attention, the tight lines around your mouth that spoke of exhaustion you were trying to hide.

Kouichi's hands moved in increasingly larger gestures, determined to share his triumph. His signing became bigger, more emphatic: "Mom! I controlled the heat! I made a rock warm but not too hot and—" His fingers shaped each sign with perfect clarity, unconsciously demonstrating the control he'd learned that afternoon.

Your hands stilled for just a moment, genuine pride breaking through the stress. "That's amazing, sweetheart," you signed, love and pride shining through despite your exhaustion. But your response was cut short by a customer calling out their order. "I want to hear all about it, just... give me a little time, okay?"

Kouichi's face fell slightly, though he tried to hide it. His small hands dropped to his sides, the excitement dimming in his eyes like a candle being slowly extinguished. Kouichi's dimming enthusiasm hit Katsuki harder than he expected, like a punch he wasn't braced to receive.

"Oi," he signed to Kouichi, getting the boy's attention. "Let's sit down," he directed, guiding him toward the only empty seats at the counter's far end. The simple gesture was a quiet reminder that someone was still paying attention to him, still saw him through the chaos of the busy shop.

Kouichi nodded eagerly, settling onto the stool. You hurried past with two steaming bowls of curry, offering a quick glance that somehow conveyed both warmth and apology. Your movements stayed precise despite the obvious fatigue in your shoulders, each step measured as you navigated the crowded space.

"I'll get your food as soon as I can," you signed between packing orders, but three more customers walked in, the bell's cheerful chime feeling almost mocking now. Each new arrival seemed to add another weight to your shoulders, though you moved through the chaos with practiced grace, your movements precise despite your obvious fatigue.

He watched as you juggled multiple orders, your usual grace starting to fray at the edges. When you nearly dropped a bowl, catching it just in time but splashing curry sauce on your apron, he saw real strain flash across your face before you buried it beneath a professional smile. Something in that glimpse of vulnerability made him shift forward in his seat, his body moving before his mind could catch up.

Once Katsuki and Kouichi finally got their food, Kouichi pulled out his remaining schoolwork. The workbook was slightly scorched around the edges, evidence of this morning's frustration, but he attacked it with a determination that reminded Katsuki of himself.

"Mom?" Kouichi's hands moved in question, drawing your attention from where you were recording takeout orders. "What does this word mean?"

You glanced at the workbook, starting to explain, but another customer's voice cut through the din. Your explanation faltered as you tried to split your focus, signing with one hand while reaching for clean bowls with the other. The strain of trying to be everything for everyone showed in the slight trembling of your fingers, in the way you bit your lip in concentration.

"Mom?" Kouichi tried again moments later, pointing to a different problem. Each time you started to help, something else demanded attention – a new order, a spill that needed cleaning, customers requesting their bills. The constant interruptions were wearing you down, though you tried to hide it behind efficient movements and professional smiles.

Katsuki saw the moment it all became too much. Your hands trembled slightly as you stirred a pot of curry, your eyes darting between Kouichi's hopeful face and the growing stack of orders. The careful balance you usually maintained between mother and shop owner was cracking, and something protective surged in his chest at the sight. He recognized the look in your eyes – the same desperate determination he felt when trying to prove he could handle everything alone, even as the world kept demanding more.

The next time Kouichi raised his hands to ask a question, Katsuki shifted closer without conscious thought. The movement was natural, automatic - like adjusting his stance in a fight or reaching for support gear during patrol. Without a word, he angled himself to see the workbook better, as if helping with homework was something he did every day. Kouichi looked up in surprise as Katsuki's shadow fell across his paper.

"Show me what you're working on," Katsuki signed.

Kouichi pointed to a science worksheet about plant growth cycles. His small finger traced the confusing sequence of illustrations. "I don't understand which comes first," he signed, frustration evident in his furrowed brow.

Katsuki studied the page for a moment, his mind already breaking down the concept into manageable pieces. Years of analyzing quirk mechanics and battle strategies had honed his ability to explain complex ideas simply.

"Think about making curry," Katsuki signed. "What comes first?" 

Kouichi's eyes lit up at the familiar comparison. "Getting ingredients!"

"Right. Just like we need ingredients for curry, a plant needs ingredients to grow." His hands shaped each concept with careful precision. "The seed is like the first ingredient. It needs water and soil, just like curry needs water and spices."

You glanced over while measuring out rice, catching sight of them bent together over the workbook. The sight of Katsuki bent over the workbook with Kouichi, his usual intensity softened, stirred something quiet and unexpected within you.His crimson eyes were focused intently on Kouichi's face, watching to make sure the boy followed each explanation.

A customer called for a refill, pulling your attention away, but your eyes kept drifting back to them between orders. Katsuki's hands moved with surprising patience as he explained each stage of plant growth, relating it to things Kouichi understood from the kitchen. The boy's face glowed with comprehension as concepts that had seemed impossible suddenly made sense.

"See? Just like how curry needs time to simmer, plants need time to grow." Katsuki's signs flowed more smoothly now, his initial awkwardness forgotten in the focus of teaching. "Each stage is important, just like each step in cooking."

A bittersweet tenderness washed over you as you observed them working together– Kouichi's hands flying with enthusiasm as he finally grasped the concept, his expressions matching Katsuki's determined focus. There was something achingly natural about how they fit together, how Katsuki's usual sharp edges softened as he broke down complex ideas into pieces Kouichi could understand. 

Between serving bowls of curry and recording orders, you couldn't help noticing how competent Katsuki was with Kouichi. He didn't oversimplify or talk down to him, but explained things clearly and expected understanding. It was the same approach you'd always used – treating Kouichi's questions with respect while making sure the answers were accessible.

"Mom, look!" Kouichi's excited signing caught your attention as you passed with a tray of empty dishes. "I understand it now!" He held up his completed worksheet, pride shining in his dark eyes.

You smiled, warmth spreading through your chest at his excitement. "That's wonderful, baby," you signed quickly before turning to deliver another order. You couldn't help watching them between orders—how quickly they'd fallen into step together, how your son straightened whenever Katsuki acknowledged his progress.

Stop it, you scolded yourself, tearing your gaze away. This isn't permanent. He's only here because he's on medical leave. Once he's cleared to return to hero work, he'll have more important things to do than help with homework.

But watching him guide Kouichi through another problem, his hands moving with growing confidence through signs he must have practiced when no one was watching...it was hard to remember why you were supposed to keep your distance. Hard not to imagine more evenings like this, hard not to want this to be more than temporary.

Don't read into it, you told yourself firmly. He's just being kind. He's probably like this with all kids – he's a hero, after all. It doesn't mean anything.

The evening stretched on, full of these dangerous moments – glimpses of what could be, if you were brave enough to want it. If you were whole enough to deserve it. If the world was kind enough to let you keep it.

The last customers finally filtered out, leaving behind a scatter of empty bowls and the lingering scent of curry that permeated everything. Quiet settled over the shop like a heavy blanket, broken only by the soft clink of dishes and the gentle hum of the refrigerator. You moved behind the counter with mechanical efficiency, muscle memory carrying you through motions you'd performed thousands of times before. Your hands trembled slightly as you stacked bowls from the counter's edge, fatigue settling deep in your bones after hours of non-stop movement.

Kouichi had dozed off at the counter, his small face peaceful against his folded arms, schoolwork spread out beneath him. The sight made your chest ache – he should be in bed, not falling asleep in the shop because you couldn't manage to balance everything properly. But there had been so many customers, so many demands on your attention, and Katsuki had been there helping with homework, and somehow time had slipped away from you like water through cupped hands.

Katsuki watched you from his spot at the counter, crimson eyes tracking your path through the small space. You'd been in constant motion since they'd arrived, always reaching, lifting, serving – but he hadn't seen you take a single proper bite of food. Even now, exhaustion clear in every line of your body, you kept pushing forward with that quiet determination that made his chest tight. It reminded him too much of himself, that stubborn refusal to show weakness, to admit when things were becoming too much.

"Oi," he called out. You immediately looked up from your cleaning. His hands moved with a steadiness that hadn't been there days ago. "You've been running around feeding everyone else all day. When was the last time you actually ate something yourself?"

Your hands stilled on the bowl you were reaching for, surprise flickering across your face before you could hide it. The question caught you off guard – when was the last time you'd eaten? You'd had... something, surely. There had been that half-finished bowl of rice this morning, and you'd tested the curry batch for seasoning, and...

"I eat plenty," you signed back, the defensive gesture betrayed by how you wouldn't quite meet his eyes. Your stomach chose that moment to protest loudly, making heat crawl up your neck.

"Bullshit." He stood, moving around the counter with purposeful strides. There was something almost predatory in his grace, the way he commanded space even in this simple movement. "You had lunch with us earlier, sure, but that was hours ago. Since then, all you've had is whatever you can grab between customers. Call that eating if you want, but we both know it's not."

The observation struck deeper than it should have. You were used to running on empty, used to putting everyone else's needs before your own. It had become such a habit you barely noticed anymore – there was always another customer to serve, another task that needed attention, another reason to postpone taking care of yourself.

"I'm fine," you signed, movements sharp with embarrassment. "There's still cleaning to do." The excuse sounded weak even to your own ears, but old habits died hard. Taking care of yourself had always seemed like a luxury you couldn't afford, not when there were bills to pay and a child to raise.

But Katsuki was already taking the stack of bowls from your hands, his movements leaving no room for argument. His fingers brushed yours in the exchange, callused and warm, and you tried to ignore how that simple contact sent electricity skittering across your skin.

"Sit," he signed after setting them aside, pointing firmly at the counter stool. "I'll handle this."

"I don't need—" you started to protest, but he cut you off with a look that could have melted steel. The intensity in his crimson eyes made your breath catch, not from intimidation but from the genuine concern you saw lurking beneath his scowl.

"You're about to fall over," he signed, his movements gentler than his expression would suggest. "Let someone else take care of things for once."

"I can't just—" you tried again, but your hands were trembling now for reasons that had nothing to do with exhaustion. The words died in your hands as you caught his expression – not pity, which you couldn't have borne, but something closer to understanding.

"Yes, you can." His signs were firm but carried an undertone of something that might have been concern. You recognized the look in his eyes – the same one you wore when Kouichi pushed himself too hard, when he insisted he was fine even though you could see him struggling. "Now sit before you collapse and give me more shit to clean up."

A laugh escaped before you could stop it, surprised and a little watery. Katsuki's eyes softened at the sound, his usual scowl melting into something gentler that made your heart skip. Something about seeing DynaMight standing in your tiny kitchen made all your careful defenses start to crack. You found yourself sinking onto the stool he'd indicated, your body yielding to his demand before your mind could formulate any further protest.

The sight of him moving through your space with such natural familiarity made your heart do complicated things in your chest. He navigated between counter and stove as if he'd memorized every inch, his powerful hands handling your worn dishes with unexpected care. A bowl appeared in front of you, steam rising in fragrant clouds. You hadn't even noticed him preparing it, too mesmerized by the sight of someone else moving with purpose through the kitchen you'd always tended to alone.

"Eat," he signed without looking up from the sink, but you caught the slight pink tinge to his ears that betrayed his gruff exterior. “You're no good to anyone if you keep pushing yourself like this.”

The warmth that bloomed in your chest had nothing to do with the curry and everything to do with how naturally he'd claimed his place in your world. As if he belonged here, in your tiny shop with its worn counters and familiar rhythms. As if taking care of you was something he'd always done.

The warm curry filled your mouth, rich flavors spreading across your tongue—the first proper meal you'd had since dawn. You noticed his gaze flicking toward you as you ate, a quick, concerned glance that he tried to disguise as casual. Something softened in your chest at his unspoken attentiveness. There was something comforting about someone caring enough to watch over you.

The comfortable silence stretched between you, broken only by the soft splash of dishes in the sink and Kouichi's gentle breathing from his corner. The evening light painted everything in soft gold, catching in Katsuki's ash-blonde hair and making him look softer somehow. You watched his hands move through the familiar motions of cleaning – the same hands that created devastating explosions in battle now carefully washing your dishes, treating your worn bowls with a gentleness that made your throat tight. He moved through your kitchen like he knew where everything belonged, and maybe he did. Maybe he'd been paying attention all this time, learning your rhythms, finding his place in this small world you'd built.

The clock on the wall ticked past ten, far later than you'd realized. The day's exhaustion settled deeper into your bones as the adrenaline of the dinner rush finally faded completely. You stifled a yawn, gathering your empty bowl to bring to the sink, but Katsuki wordlessly took it from you with a look that brooked no argument. 

You moved to wake Kouichi, your hands already reaching toward his shoulder, when Katsuki's warm fingers wrapped gently around your wrist. The contact sent electricity skittering across your skin, but his touch was careful, almost hesitant, as if he was afraid of startling you.

"Don't wake him," he signed one-handed, his other hand still holding your wrist with surprising gentleness. His expression softened as he looked at Kouichi, something protective flickering in his crimson eyes. "I'll carry him. Just show me where."

The offer caught you off guard, a flutter of warmth spreading through you. You hesitated, old instincts warring with the trust that had been building between you. Letting someone else carry your sleeping child, letting them into your private space above the shop – it went against years of careful boundaries, of keeping everyone at arm's length.

But this was Katsuki, who had spent the evening teaching your son with endless patience. Katsuki, who noticed when you weren't eating and made sure you took care of yourself. Katsuki, who had already crossed so many of your carefully constructed barriers without ever making you feel unsafe.

Your nod came after a moment's hesitation. His hand fell away from your wrist, leaving your skin tingling from the brief contact. He picked up Kouichi with surprising care, his movements quiet and efficient. Your son barely stirred as Katsuki lifted him, small body relaxing naturally against his chest as if he'd done this a hundred times before. 

You led the way up the narrow stairs to your apartment, each creaking step familiar beneath your feet. The stairwell was tight, forcing you to walk close enough to feel the heat radiating from Katsuki's body behind you.

The door opened into your small living room, warm light spilling from the lamp you always left on. It wasn't much – just a modest two-bedroom unit above the shop – but you'd poured everything you had into making it feel like home. Kouichi's artwork covered the walls, each piece carefully framed as if it belonged in a gallery. A collection of his origami creatures marched along a bookshelf, arranged by color – something he'd done himself one afternoon when you were teaching him about organization.

You watched Katsuki take it all in, suddenly seeing your space through his eyes. The well-worn couch with its carefully patched cushions, evidence of years of stretching resources. Kouichi's finger painting of a colorful mountain sat drying on the coffee table, surrounded by newspaper spread out to protect the surface. Everything in its place, everything serving a purpose, everything chosen with careful consideration of limited means.

His gaze lingered on the family photos dotting the walls, telling the story of your life with Kouichi in captured moments. You watched his eyes catch on one from the hospital – you looked so young, so exhausted but triumphant, cradling your newborn son. Another showed Kouichi's first day of preschool, his smile bright despite the uncertainty you remembered him feeling. Each image carefully chosen to show only joy, no hints of the struggles that lay beneath the surface.

Books filled every available space – sign language dictionaries dog-eared from constant use, parenting guides marked with sticky notes, and well-worn cookbooks. They showed how you'd taught yourself to be everything Kouichi needed, learning through determination what most people had help to figure out.

Something shifted in Katsuki's expression as he absorbed it all. His eyes caught on the height measurements marked on the kitchen door frame, each line dated and decorated with small stars. 

The intimacy of having him here, seeing these private markers of your life with Kouichi, made your chest tight. YHe wasn't just seeing your apartment - he was seeing the life you and Kouichi had built together. His careful handling of Kouichi, the way he took in every detail without judgment, made something warm unfurl in your chest despite your usual caution.

You moved ahead into Kouichi's room, turning down the covers of his bed decorated with hero-print sheets – a special find from a secondhand store that had made his whole face light up. The walls here were his gallery, covered in crayon drawings of heroes in action. But it was the sheer number featuring Dynamight that caught your attention now – explosive quirk rendered in bright oranges and reds, each one capturing that fierce determination Kouichi so admired.

Katsuki's steps faltered as he noticed them, something soft and surprised flickering across his face. You watched him take in the evidence of how long he'd been Kouichi's favorite hero, long before he ever stepped foot in your shop. His eyes lingered on one drawing in particular – Dynamight standing protectively in front of a smaller figure with dark hair, flames dancing around them both. The date in the corner was from just after Kouichi's quirk manifested.

Katsuki carefully eased Kouichi onto the bed, his hands moving with such precision that the covers barely shifted. Your son snuggled into his familiar spot, one hand automatically reaching for the worn All Might plush that had been his constant companion since infancy. Together, you stood watching him sleep, his small face peaceful in the gentle glow of his nightlight. 

Your hands moved in the dim light, forming a simple "thank you" that encompassed far more than just carrying him upstairs. But your fingers trembled slightly, betraying how much it meant to have someone else here, someone who saw all your careful defenses and chose to be gentle with them.

Katsuki's eyes met yours with quiet intensity, crimson softened to burgundy in the low light. He understood – you weren't just thanking him for tonight, but for everything: for teaching Kouichi with endless patience, for seeing your struggles without making you feel weak, for treating your trust as the precious thing it was. For making your careful world feel less lonely without ever making you feel like you weren't enough on your own.

Stepping out of Kouichi's room, you found yourself suddenly aware of how narrow the hallway was, barely wide enough for two people to pass. The dim light from the living room cast long shadows, softening Katsuki's usually sharp features into something almost gentle. He stood close enough that you could feel the warmth radiating from him, your shoulder nearly brushing his chest in the confined space. The familiar scent of caramel and smoke that always clung to him mixed with the gentle aroma of curry that permeated your home, creating something new and intoxicating that made your heart beat faster.

You should have stepped away. Should have maintained the careful distance you always kept between yourself and others. But something about having him here, in this private space where you only ever let Kouichi exist, made all your usual defenses feel paper-thin.

"Would you like some tea?" you signed, the offer slipping out before you could second-guess it. "As a thank you." The words felt inadequate against everything he'd done tonight.

His eyes met yours in the half-light, their crimson hue deepened by the shadows. For a moment, he seemed to be weighing something behind that intense gaze. You found yourself holding your breath, though you couldn't have said why. The air between you felt charged, like the moment before lightning strikes.

"Yeah," he finally signed. "Tea would be good." Such simple words, and yet they carried the weight of crossing another boundary - from helper to guest, from Kouichi's mentor to something less easily defined.

You led him to your small kitchen, hyper aware of his presence behind you. The space felt different with him in it. You'd never noticed how small your kitchen was until his broad shoulders filled the doorway, until his presence made every movement feel like a delicate dance of almost-touching.

You busied yourself with the kettle, grateful for the routine tasks that gave your hands something to do. The familiar motions helped ground you - measuring tea leaves, heating water, reaching for mugs. 

"Kouichi did well today," Katsuki signed once you were both seated at your small kitchen table, steam rising from the mugs between you. His movements had grown more fluid with practice, each sign shaped with the same precision he brought to everything he did. "He's got good instincts. Just needs confidence."

The genuine pride in his expression reminded you exactly why you were finding it increasingly difficult to keep your guard up around him.

"He was so excited about today he could hardly focus on anything else," you signed, a smile touching your lips. "I haven't seen him this enthusiastic about learning in a long time." The admission carried more weight than you'd intended - hints of Kouichi's struggles at school, of the isolation that came with being different.

Katsuki's eyes drifted to a photo on your refrigerator - you and Kouichi in the hospital, his tiny face scrunched and red against your chest. The sight of him studying that particular moment made your heart skip. That photo captured both the best and worst day of your life - the joy of holding your son tempered by the bone-deep exhaustion of running, of knowing you weren't safe even in the hospital.

"He was early, wasn't he?" The observation caught you off guard. Trust Katsuki to notice what most people missed.

"How could you tell?" 

"The monitoring equipment in the background," he signed, gesturing toward the photo. 

You nodded slowly, choosing your words carefully. "Six weeks early. We were in the hospital for a while, but he was strong." The simplified version of events felt hollow in your mouth, omitting the fear and exhaustion of those days, the constant looking over your shoulder even in the hospital. You didn't mention the cheap motels before that, the careful planning of your escape, the way you'd rationed food to save money for medical care you knew you'd need.

Something flickered in Katsuki's expression - recognition, perhaps, of the gaps in your story. You saw the questions form and die in his eyes, saw him choose not to push. Instead, he reached for the honey jar at the same moment you did. Your fingers brushed, sending electricity skittering across your skin. You both pulled back quickly, but the ghost of his touch lingered, warm and dangerous.

His attention returned to the photograph, his expression unreadable as his eyes traced over the image. "Can see where he gets that determination from," he signed, his gaze lifting to meet yours for just a moment before glancing away. 

Heat crept up your neck at the unexpected compliment, at the way his gaze moved from the photo to your face with careful consideration. 

"You notice a lot," you signed, trying to keep your movements casual despite your racing heart. The words felt inadequate against the weight of everything he seemed to understand without being told.

"Hard not to," he signed back, something in his expression making your breath catch. 

The implications of that statement hung in the air between you. The soft kitchen light cast a warm glow over his ash-blonde hair, and you noticed how his expression had gentled, the usual hard lines of his face relaxed. Your heart skipped a beat despite your best efforts to remain composed. He looked right somehow, sitting at your small kitchen table with his calloused hands curved around the mug you'd bought at a secondhand store. Like he belonged here.

A comfortable silence settled between you. The gentle steam from your mugs curled upward in the quiet kitchen, and you found yourself relaxing into the moment, your usual vigilance softening at the edges. The exhaustion of the day caught up with you all at once, and before you could stop it, a yawn escaped, your hand flying up too late to cover it.

Katsuki's eyes flickered to you immediately, that sharp observation that missed nothing softening with something that might have been concern.

"You're tired," he signed, his movements gentle in the warm kitchen light. There was no judgment in his expression, just that quiet attentiveness that seemed to catch everything.

"Long day," you admitted, embarrassed at being caught but too tired to properly hide it. Another yawn threatened, and this time you didn't bother fighting it.

"I should go," he signed decisively, setting his mug down with careful precision. "You need rest."

Despite your fatigue, you felt a flicker of disappointment that surprised you with its intensity. You'd grown so used to keeping people at a distance that the reluctance to see him leave felt foreign, almost dangerous.

"It's okay," you signed, even as you suppressed another yawn.

He snorted softly. "You can barely keep your eyes open."

Before you could protest, he was standing, collecting both your mugs and placing them in the sink. The simple consideration of it—that he wouldn't leave you with more to clean—was becoming a pattern you couldn't help but appreciate.

"Come on," he signed once he'd turned back to you. "I'll head out so you can get some sleep."

The wooden stairs creaked softly under your feet as you followed Katsuki down to the shop entrance. Shadows pooled in the corners, broken only by the gentle glow of streetlights filtering through the front windows, painting everything in shades of gold and shadow. Your small shop, usually so comfortable in its limitations, felt different at this hour. The counter where you'd served countless bowls of curry, the worn wooden floors that had supported thousands of footsteps, the simple decorations that made this space yours – everything seemed to hold its breath, waiting.

"Same time tomorrow?" Katsuki signed, his movements illuminated by the light above the door. The question was casual, practical, but something in his expression made your heart flutter traitorously in your chest. His hands moved with growing confidence through the signs, evidence of late-night practice sessions he'd never admit to. 

"If you're sure you don't mind," you signed back, hands moving carefully in the dim light. "I know it's a lot of time to spend on your leave." 

He scoffed, the sound soft in the quiet shop. But then his hands stilled, hovering in the space between you as if caught between impulse and restraint. You caught something flicker across his face – an aborted movement, words left unsaid. The hesitation felt significant somehow.

His shoulders tensed slightly, and you could almost see him wrestling with whatever he'd stopped himself from saying. The struggle played out in minute changes of expression, in the way his fingers twitched as if seeking signs he wasn't ready to form. You found yourself holding your breath, though you couldn't have said why.

Instead, his eyes found yours in the half-light, crimson softened to burgundy by the shadows. The intensity of his gaze made your breath catch, though there was something gentle in it that hadn't been there before.

"You know," he signed, movements deliberate, each gesture carrying the weight of careful observation, "for someone who spends all day feeding people, you're pretty bad at taking care of yourself."

The comment took you by surprise, not only for how spot-on it was but also for the quiet concern hidden in his rough voice.

"I take care of what matters," you signed, the familiar defense feeling weaker under his steady gaze. The words tasted like the half-truths you'd been telling yourself for years – that you could keep running on empty, that taking care of yourself was a luxury you couldn't afford, that being strong meant never admitting when you needed help.

His expression shifted into something that might have been fondness, though he quickly masked it with his usual scowl. But you caught it – that moment of softness, of understanding that went deeper than words. "Tch. That includes you, you know."

The words settled warm and heavy in your chest, carrying more weight than their simple meaning should allow. In the dim light, your eyes traced the sharp line of his jaw, the way his ash-blonde hair caught the streetlight's glow, how his usual intensity had softened into something that made your heart beat faster.

"Same time tomorrow," Katsuki signed, his movements illuminated by the light above the door. The statement carried no uncertainty, just the same decisive confidence he brought to everything. A sense of comfort washed over you at his certainty, at how naturally he'd claimed his place in your routine.

"Yes," you nodded simply.

He turned toward the door, and in the narrow space, his shoulder brushed against yours. The brief contact sent electricity skittering across your skin, leaving warmth in its wake that lingered long after the touch itself.

The bell chimed softly as he left, its familiar sound somehow hollow in his absence. You stood in the doorway, watching his figure disappear into the night, the streets quiet except for the distant hum of traffic. Without him, the shop felt suddenly larger, emptier—as if the space he'd occupied had left a vacuum nothing else could fill.

Seeing Double - Chapter 3

Pairings - Simon “Ghost” Riley x MacTavish!Reader, Platonic! John “Soap” MacTavish x MacTavish Reader, Platonic! Kyle “Gaz” Garrick x Reader

Summary - You are sent with Ghost and Soap to Mexico on your first team mission. But was it really your first?

Warnings - consumption of alcohol, mentions of past trauma, discussions of past trauma, jealousy, suggestive content, discussions of violence, adults cursing, angst but comfort I swear.

Author's Notes- Spanish is used bc reader, as a translator, is a #billingual queen but there is an immediate translation right after spanish is used and it is marked by only italicizing, if it's italicized and has 'these' then that's a direct inner thought. To my Spanish speaking readers or bilingual readers, I apologize if I fucked up anything. Im using the Spanish I learned growing up on my dad’s side of the family in Texas and almost 2.5 years of learning Spanish in highschool and college. My Spanish is more South Texas based but I still learned northern Mexican slang from my tíos. Anyways I hope you enjoy. Bear with me because some of the gender wasn’t translating pero es todo bien.

Word Count - 8k.. yeah ik. I’m shocked too.

Masterlist / Pt.1 , Pt.2 (this is a series but ig you can treat it as a stand alone)

“In how long?” John spoke, briefly peeking at the mission file.

“A week. I’m giving you time to prepare Banshee for using her translating skills as you’ll be working with Los Vaqueros again.” Laswell nodded to them.

“What for?” You piped up. Everyone turned to look at you, not because you spoke out of turn but because you usually waited for someone to speak to you.

“We have intel that Hassan might be in the mountains nearby Las Almas. You’ll find out more when you arrive. ” Kate responded, respecting your piqued curiosity.

You nodded to yourself. You did need to scrub up on your Spanish even if you were fluent.

The week passed by quick as you hit the books and the range. You had taken the time to bond with Gaz as the man tried to pick up a few languages from you. Price keeps you far from the mats after your blood bath with Ghost. Speaking of him, the masked man was oddly never around. Only there for meal times and maybe a glimpse at him before bed.

You didn’t see him again until the night before you were to be sent out with them to Mexico. You had been so focused on working through your knife throwing that you didn’t realize the time had passed until it was midnight. Six hours until you were to be on an aircraft headed to Las Almas.

Dull thuds filled the room as you sunk your knife again and again into the target. A masked figure passing by the door before stopping.

“Can’t sleep?” Ghost spoke as you retrieved your knives. You nearly jumped out of your skin at his voice, noticing him in the shadows of the entryway.

“Never been able to on the night before a mission.” You omitted as you took your stance again. Anything was better than looking at him. Quiet fell over the both of you as he watched. You could feel him studying you as you ran your drills.

Eager to break the silence, you remembered from Johnny that Ghost was quite the fan of dad jokes so you decided to try them out, “Sir, Do you know what sprinters eat before their race?” You spoke.

He spoke nothing but you got the feeling he was waiting for the punchline.

“Nothing, they fast.” You spoke. He froze for a moment before a sigh of air left his mouth almost similar to a chuckle but not quite. Relief flooded your body at breaking some of the tension. What you were not expecting was for him to give you one of his own.

“What do you call a pig that practices karate?” Ghost’s voice came out low as if he too had been starving himself of sleep.

A beat passed as you gave him a hum of interest.

“Pork chop.”

Ghost froze as the sound of a giggle slipped from your lips. Your shoulders sluggish as you threw the final knife but it still fell in line with the others. You gathered your knives and put them away slowly. You turned to face him only to find the doorway empty.

You didn’t see the lieutenant again until you made your way to the tarmac early the next morning. You had all your gear on from head to toe including a new pair of black shades to cover your eyes. Your hair was pulled up as you adjusted your vest. It weighed heavy on you almost as if the weight of your last team mission was still suffocating you.

Ghost stood off to the side with Price as they spoke with your pilot and Gaz. The masked man nodded to Price, listening but his eyes traced you as you walked up to the aircraft confidently. Something Gaz nor Price failed to catch upon but dismissed it under the idea that the man didn’t trust you yet.

Johnny had already made his way onto the aircraft as he turned around to extend a hand to you. Almost as if he had sensed that you would need a helping hand. You clasped his hand tightly as he pulled you up with a grunt.

Both of you exchanged a smile as the engine of the aircraft roared to life. Wind suddenly pushing through the entryway, sending a chill down your spine.

“Just like old times aye?” Johnny said as he held up a fist bump.

“Aye, just like old times.” You replied as you knocked knuckles, ignoring the growing bubble of worry in your gut. Oh how you hoped it would be different this time. You settled in next to your brother and got ready for the ride.

Ghost noticed how you never fully relaxed even as your twin, your supposed mirror image, Soap fell dead asleep on the flight over to Mexico. You had avoided his eye contact again for the whole plane ride, letting it fall to the floor or rise to the ceiling above.

You constantly adjusted everything even as the three of you left the aircraft. Something was bothering you and your commanding officer itched to know why. What was making you twitch. He felt his curiosity blooming in his chest before letting it die as a gruff voice cut through the air.

“Alejandro!” Soap cheered, a loud clap sounded through the air as their hands met in a firm shake and a quick nod.

“Glad to see you made it over in one piece, Jabón” Alejandro said as his gaze peered over to Soap’s teammate, not failing to notice the third set of feet hidden behind the two men.

Alejandro scanned over Ghost quickly as he spoke, “Lieutenant. Laswell says they call you Ghost.”

Soap practically lunged at the opportunity to interject, “Colonel, he actually he prefers to be called-”

“That’ll do.” Ghost cut him off quickly.

“And who is this behind you?” Alejandro said as Soap and Ghost stepped aside to reveal you standing there.

“Aye this is my twin sister-” Soap stopped short as the Colonel pulled you in for a tight embrace. Silencing both the lieutenant and Sergeant completely because you didn’t frown or even flinch at the sudden invasion of your personal space, something completely out of the norm for you.

“Chiqui! Aye qué bueno verte de nuevo!” Little girl (affectionately)! How good to see you again! The spanish slipped free from his tongue as you both separated. His hands lingered on yours as you step back. A small blush on your cheeks.

“Y a ti también. Pero creo que te dije que ya no me llamaras chiqui, no?” And you as well. But I believe I told you not to call me little girl anymore, no? Your eyebrow cocked up at him. A deep rumble leaving his throat as Soap cleared his own to cut through the conversation.

“Alright, Alright. Let us join the others back at the base hermanos!” Alejandro spoke to the group as you all began walking to the vehicle. Out of the corner of the lieutenant’s eyes, he saw the way you and Soap geared up to fight for the front seat, only to be disappointed when Alejandro climbed into the shotgun.

“Welcome to the city of souls, hermanos! A Bienvenidos de nuevo, Chiqui” Welcome back, Chiqui. Alejandro cheered as you all piled into the jeep. Soap took the seat behind the driver, and you slid in the middle, leaving Ghost to take the seat behind Alejandro. For once, you didn’t bristle at being so close to the lieutenant. A soft gasp left the driver as brown eyes met your own through the mirror, even if your eyes were shielded by the dark sunglasses.

“No mames, güey.” No way, dude. The driver interjected as he peered around the seat to see you. Your soft gaze meeting his own shocked one. A gruff noise left Ghost’s mouth to interject the moment and cut it off. This whole thing was starting to get on his nerves.

“Hola Rudy” you smiled. “Lieutenant, this is Sergeant Major Roldofo, everyone calls him Rudy. Rudy, este es mi teniente. Estoy seguro de que no necesitas presentación a Jabón.” Rudy, this is my lieutenant. I am sure that you need no introduction to Soap. Your hand pointing to each man as you introduced them. Your brain easily slid into place as you slipped between the languages.

“Tengo miedo de los fantasmas” Rudy shuddered slightly. Ghost’s head barely turned towards you, waiting for the translation.

“He said he has a fear of Ghosts.” You smiled playfully, shoving Rudy to turn around as you waited for the jeep to go.

“¡Vamos hermanos!” Let’s go brothers! Alejandro said as Rudy’s foot roughly slammed into the gas pedal as the jeep took off. A smile slowly creeped onto your face as you suddenly felt the wind in your hair again. Your shades protect you from the harsh glare of the sun. Maybe it wasn’t so bad to be back.

Soap peered out the window as they made their way into Las Almas. Outskirts of the sandy town were covered in graffiti as the houses came into view. Soap suddenly gripped his rifle as Ghost tensed up, both of them spotting a vehicle in the distance and strange men in masks covering the town.

“One black vehicle, about three men armed along the entrance” Soap called forward to Alejandro and Rudy. For half a second Ghost almost cursed at your poor reaction time until he heard Alejandro interject

“Cálmate, hermano. Es todo bien.” Calm yourself brother. Everything is fine. He spoke up, and then followed up with an explanation. “Las Almas is dangerous and the cartel here plays dirty. But I promise you those who are here to ‘uphold the law’ never succeed for long. Not until Narcos slips money into their pockets and women into their laps.”

“What about the military?” Ghost spoke out. His confusion masked behind a voice of concern.

“Es lo mismo. We’re even more likely to be corrupted and turned into working for the narcos because of our combat skills.” It’s the same. Alejandro nodded to the men ahead as he spoke.

“So why haven’t you been corrupted yet?” Ghost responded almost immediately. Just because you and Soap trusted these men doesn’t mean he has to. He only trusts you through an association of Johnny.

Alejandro knew why he asked but it didn’t stop his tongue from clicking as he responded. Pride swelled in his chest as he spoke. The honesty of his voice silenced any doubt. “We grew up here. The locals call us Los Vaqueros, the cowboys, for a reason. Anyone who calls himself or herself such a name and fights beside me is willing to die for the sake of saving even an inch of this city.”

Soap could see the love the man had for his community as they passed by women and children on the street. He silently wondered why they looked so happy in such a dangerous town. Did they not know what was going on?

“Be weary of the civilians. Yes we are welcoming of strangers but just remember that anyone can be turned into a piece of intel for Narcos. They can be quite.. charismatic.” Rudy spoke to the men.

“Even the children and women?”

“Especialmente las mujeres y los niños.” Especially the women and children, Rudy responded almost immediately.

Ghost nodded as Rudy hummed in agreement as they pulled up closer to the base. You were oddly silent as you took in how the base has evolved. Rudy pulled up to the gate and only had to look at the officer before being let in. You noticed how the sun was beginning to turn the sky orange. You missed how beautiful it was here. The heat not even bothering you as the open windows of the jeep gave your baby hairs around your face a beautiful framing. For just a mere moment you could forget why you left.

The sound of a car door opening pulled you out of your thoughts as Ghost and Soap quickly exited the vehicle. Everyone grabbing their respective bags. Rudy quickly matched your pace and stood to the left of you as Soap walked on your right.

“Veo que sigues siendo la boca de tu escuadrón, Chiqui” I see you’re still the mouth of your squadron. Rudy smiled before slipping into spanglish, “Do either of los güeros speak spanish, or sola tú?” Either of the white boys (like fair-skinned) speak spanish or just you? You could tell why he wanted to know but kept your mouth shut as you nodded to your brother.

“Mi hermano puede placticar un poco, pero solo lo sabe las palabras malas.” My brother can conversate a little, but he only knows the bad words. You responded as you glanced at Johnny. Noticing how he looked a little down.

Johnny’s heart sunk a little in his chest. Just how much of your new life had he missed? How did he not know that you had already met them and formed these close ties. You pulled him out of his thoughts as you ruffled his hair.

“So Jabón, why didn’t you tell me that you were related to Chiqui here, hm?” Rudy spoke, “we could’ve traded stories about her”

“I didn’t keen ye knew ‘er like tha.” Johnny said, suddenly meeting the Sergeant Major’s eyes, “How do ye know ‘er?”

Memories flashed across your eyes as you remember how you met the Mexican task force. How you came here stumbling around like a lost child when you were first assigned. The sounds of music flooding your ears as images of you dancing with a certain brown eyed man flashed across your eyes. The late night steak outs and the embarrassing moments of learning how Spanish is truly spoken and used. The images stopped and memories turned sour as you then remembered why you left, or why you were dismissed.

“She was assigned as our translator and infiltration specialist,” Rudy nodded, then he smiled as he jested a little, “Colonel over there thought it might be hard for military men to lure secrets from men as we are not their usual type. So we decided we needed someone more.. convincing. But we couldn’t trust any woman in this country so Alejandro sent a request to the Americans, and your sister showed up.”

“They were my first team after I stopped requesting solo missions.” You added on. Soap sighed at the notion that you were used to be bait for the corrupt men of this town to slip their secrets into. A silence fell over the group until you three walked into the living quarters of the base.

“Why do you and the colonel call her Chiqui?” Soap then turned to ask. His accent loosely stumbled around the nickname even if he said it confidently but he didn’t care. His curiosity bugged him. Sure, you’d let superiors walk over you but giving you a nickname was entirely different. It was intimate. Something he didn’t know you could do with others outside of the family or your small circle of friends.

Rudy’s eyes met yours, asking for permission to tell. You blinked slowly, even unsure of the action yourself.

“She didn’t have a callsign by then and kept on speaking Spanish like a little kid. Mumbling over her words, speaking quickly, and using basic phrases, too scared to be more complex. It was cute and Chiqui is short for Chiquita. Chiquita means little girl, but it’s friendly.”

“The name stuck even after I improved my spanish during my stay here.” You added ruffling up Rudy’s hair.

“You’d always be the kid on the team, Chiqui.” Rudy smirked. “Let’s get you settled into your quarters and then maybe you three would like to join us at the bar?” He was inviting you two but specifically met your eyes first then glanced at Johnny.

Ghost had disappeared off somewhere with Alejandro, probably forming a plan for tomorrow.

“Jabón, you’ll be down the hall with El Fantasma” Ghost. Rudy said as he walked the man down to the room and Soap walked through the entrance, dropping his bags quickly.

“Johnny ye coming tonight?” You looked at him and waited for him to say something

“Ye ever known me to be a lad who turned down a good time?” Johnny shot back at you.

“Never.” You nodded

“Then ye have your answer. I’m going to shower.” He said and closed his door but not before smiling at Rudy.

Rudy nodded as the door closed and he turned to you, walked you to your room, a few doors down the hallway.

“Dormirás en esta habitación” You’ll be sleeping in this room. Rudy nodded. You sighed as you opened it and recognized it as your old room. You saw how it had been scrubbed clean and bare for newer members but you knew it was yours as Rudy’s room was just across from it. Your doors mirror each other. You turned around to meet his gaze and sighed.

“Rudy..” the low whine left your lips as you frowned at him, your eyes tightening to form a glare at the man.

“Chiquita, Te prometo que estaba fuera de mi control. El coronel insistió en que durmieras aquí.” Chiquita, I promise you that it was out of my control. The Colonel insisted you sleep here. His hands flailing to his defense even with that small, guilty smile plastered onto his lips. Your firm mask slipping at the weight of your full nickname.

“Pero Johnny-” but Johnny-

“Jabón estaré bien.” Soap will be fine. Rudy finished the sentence off. His eyes scanning yours. Your name, your real name, fell from his lips as he looked at you. You finally dropped your mask as he enveloped you in a hug.

Over the course of your two years with the team, Rudy had been your best friend, your safe haven. Even if you blurred the lines at some moments you could always count on him to be there for you. Whether that was a lover in a moment of need or a listening ear when the world weighed too heavy to bear alone. He was your best friend, no matter how blurred that line became towards the end.

His warm muscular arms dug into your sides as he held you. A moment between you passed as your arms found his neck.

“Pensé que te habías ido para siempre. El coronel pensó lo mismo. He estado tan preocupada por ti, Chiqui. Lamento no haber ido contigo ese día. Pensé que no querías estar cerca de nosotros después de lo que sucedió.” I thought you were gone forever. The colonel thought the same thing. I've been so worried about you, Chiqui. I'm sorry I didn't go with you that day. I thought you didn't want to be around us after what happened. His words came out softly, the pain evident in his voice.

You pulled back to look him in the eye, a deep sigh passing through you.

“Nunca podría odiarte, eres mi mejor amigo. Nada cambiará eso. Lo que pasó no fue tu culpa, Rudy.” I could never hate you, you are my best friend. Nothing will change that. What happened wasn't your fault, Rudy. He knew that deep down but hearing it from you helped ease some of the weight still burdening him even now.

“Do they know?” He whispered as he pulled back. The man watching you as your brows furrowed.

“About what”

“Lo que pasó, contigo, con nosotros, con esos malvados bastardos.” What happened, with you, with us, with those evil bastards. Your body froze a little at it all, the memories rushing back to your head.

“No. Se lo diré a los chicos y a Johnny cuando esté listo.” I will tell the boys and Johnny when I am ready. Rudy sighed and sat on your bed while you grabbed your bags, and then a thought crossed his mind.

“So you have a callsign?” Rudy said in English as he watched you unpack. His eyebrow quirked up at you.

“Me llaman Banshee, como la mujer” They call me Banshee, like the woman. The name made him tense up. The realization of the legend hit him, the symbolism, and his expression changed

“Hijole” Fuck/Jeez. He grumbled as the shock washed over his face. “Pinche cabrón” fucking asshole. The man didn’t have to do rocket science to know exactly who gave you that callsign.

His eyes flashed over in anger as he too remembered it all. His memories of your spine-curling screams suddenly whisper into his ear as his brain flashed the images of how scared you looked. How much fucking blood you were covered in-

“Rudy. I am fine, I actually like it, it’s..” your eyes searched for the word but he beat you to it first.

“Chingón,” he murmured as he stood up, "Badass.”

You nodded as he smiled at you, the man heading for the door. “¿Sálvame un baile, Chiquita?” Save me a dance? He questioned you with a knowing look, already predicting your answer.

You nodded as you shot back, “si el coronel no los roba todos primero” if the colonel doesn’t steal them all. You smiled knowing deep down that you’d give him a dance anyway.

“Si todavía puedes bailar, eso es, Chiqui” if you can still dance, that is. He shot back, trying to goad you like he used to do. Only to be met with your door closing in his face and a muffled giggle coming from behind it.

Rudy’s hair stood on the end of his neck, the chuckle dying in his throat, as he peered down the hall to see a certain blue-eyed Lieutenant watching him closely.

“Pinche Fantasmas” fucking ghost. The man muttering a curse under his breath as he turned in and walked into his own room.

As the sun laid low in the sky, the four men were waiting next to the jeep. Everyone was in civilian clothes to various degrees but all men were cautiously armed.

Ghost looked the most out of place out of all of them as he was in all black from his combat boots, to his pants and his top, his balaclava stuck to his face like a second skin. All of them had obvious hand guns in various places on their body.

Soap was in combat boots as well but more dressed for the sandy weather. He was in some jeans, a nice cool t-shirt, the chain of his dog tags peeking out at his neckline.

Alejandro and Rudy were both respectively dressed in a distinct style with square toed cowboy boots, and slightly baggy jeans that fluffed out at the bottom in a boot-cut manner. Their boots looked worn down over time. Both men were ready for a good time before the hell of a mission tomorrow.

“So why are ye dressed up like it’s a party tonight?” Soap questioned the two men curiously.

“Because everywhere there’s a bar, there’s music and where there’s music-” Alejandro was cut off suddenly but your voice.

“There’s dancing” you finished the sentence as you stepped into view of the four men. This was the first time Ghost had seen you in civilian clothes and he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t letting his eyes rake over you a little slower than normal. You had obviously packed with suspicion of the boys dragging you out.

You had black square toed cowgirl boots tucked underneath a beautiful pair of boot-cut blue jeans. A black belt held it up at your waist and a tight black tee pulled at your chest. Your hair was cascading down your back in it’s usual manner, you had obviously styled after your shower. You were covered in your usual assortment of jewelry, your sunglasses long gone. Glittering up at him like a jewel just barely out of his reach.

“Jeez, Sis, did ye even have a place to hide your weapons?” Johnny teased as watched his fellow men admiring you in silence.

“A woman doesn’t strap and tell” You said with a wink, your own heart pounding a little under all the attention.

“Vamos!” Let’s go! Alejandro called out as everyone got in the car. Everyone returned to the spots they took on the ride over. Rudy roared the jeep to life as he pulled out. Purposely putting a hand on the back of Alejandro’s seat to peer around to look at you and give you a grin.

Now that Ghost was closer to you, he noticed a jagged scar over your right eye, stopping just short of reaching your eyelids. It was violent and looked like it caused permanent damage and yet that only intrigued him more. He never noticed it before as he assumed you wore contact on that eye around base to hide it since sunglasses were not allowed in every room unlike Ghost’s facial coverings.

“Chiqui, blocking my view-”

“Yo sé.” I know. You clipped as you suddenly bent over. Your belt keeps your jeans down as your shirt rides up. You made your back horizontal as your hips slightly arched to make it comfortable as you completely moved out his rear window.

Ghost swears he tried to look away but his eyes were glued to your back, noticing the way your hips wiggled a little to get comfortable. Your tight black tee riding up your back as your hair fell forward a little to reveal the delicate skin underneath the cloth. Just under the hem of your tee he spotted two identical scars.

However, Rudy finally finished backing out and turning around the jeep. So your back snapped back up into place and met the back of your seat. Your shoulders gently brushing his own and Johnny’s.

.

Speaking of proximity, when Ghost took a deep breath to remind himself of his own boundary with you, the scent of your perfume invaded his senses. He swears he could smell every step of your routine from your shampoo to your lotion to that intoxicating perfume.

“Fuck yer stinking up the damn car. How am I supposed to bring home any ladies tonight if yer stink is rubbed all over me.” Soap whined softly.

“You can’t bring back women to the base anyway, Jabón.” Rudy said with a laugh at the Scotsman's dismay.

Soap was curiously looking at you for an answer so you decided to explain, “it’s the night before our mission so you shouldn’t be sleeping around, and any woman you sleep with here could be an informant for Narcos.”

A frown fell on his face as Alejandro spoke up in an attempt to console his fellow man, “You can still dance and flirt with them all you want. Just remember Jabón, anyone can work for the cartel.”

Ghost nearly rolled his eyes as he peered out the window at the setting sun in the horizon. The last thing they needed was a tipsy sergeant.

His wishes fell on deaf ears as they arrived, you and Rudy hitting the bar to order rounds. The masked giant suddenly took in the entire bar as they entered. Loud norteño music filled the air as did the laughter and the roaring conversations. People stared at him but not before failing to meet his gaze leaving him alone. He also scanned over to see the groups of men and women dancing in pairs.

The couples were so close, especially to him, embracing in a hold on their left side as their right hands interlaced and the men led their partners in dance. Chest to chest and heads right next to each other. Pairs of women being spun around in rhythm to the faster-paced music. Their legs intertwined as the knee of one man’s leg went in-between the woman’s own two. He also didn’t miss how occasionally the women were lifted up and then grinded down onto the thigh of the partner quickly before being put back down and spinning again.

“Do you know how to dance, Fantasma?” Alejandro asked the man, trying to make conversation. The three men piling into a corner booth with a full view of the dance floor.

The man shook his head as Soap answered for him.

“L.T. here has two left feet when it comes to dancing.” Johnny grinned as he said that. Johnny himself also noticed the dancing, the proximity, the rhythm.

“And what about you, Jabón?”

“I can dance but not like that.” Johnny responded, gesturing casually to the couples. Alejandro chuckled for a moment at his honesty.

“Your sister thought the same, you know, then we taught her and by the end of her stay, she would be the one dragging us to dance instead of the other way around.”

“What caused her to leave? I understand that she was pretty close with you after two years.” Johnny said curiously. Alejandro paused, trying to find a way to avoid answering, taking notice of how her own twin brother didn’t even know the circumstances.

Luckily, he didn’t have to avoid answering as you came back to the table victoriously. You and Rudy are holding ice cold bottles of beer with limes stuck in the rim to cover the opening. He also noticed the shot glasses of tequila on a platter.

You passed Ghost and Johnny each a beer, both thanking you as you handed out shots as well. Ghost gently pushed his shot back, to which you cocked an eyebrow but didn’t bother. Gleefully taking the extra shot before your brother could snag it.

“Salud!” Cheers! You, Rudy, and Alejandro said as the beer bottles held by the boys and your tequila glasses clinked together. The lieutenant’s hand shooting up to lift his mask just above his lips, the top one still slightly swollen from your move on the mat a week ago. Ghost’s eyes held your own for a mere second as he sipped his beer before you broke his gaze to take the shot. Everyone began consuming their drinks, and taking their own shot of tequila. Except for Ghost, he was watching you take his shot.

Your wet, pink tongue flickered out to wrap around the rim of the glass and lick the salt off, before shooting the clear liquor past your lips, then your glistening lips enveloped the lime and sucked out its juices. You repeated the process for the second shot as well, failing to meet his gaze. Ghost felt his pants grow just a little tighter as he watched the entire routine.

He quickly tensed up realizing what he had done before glancing to everyone around the table. The man was eternally grateful for the mask as he felt his cheeks dust. Rudy and Soap deep in conversation about different beers around the world as he breathed a short sigh of relief. Your gaze on two men arguing over something as silly as piss water.

‘Idiot. You’re lucky nobody noticed.’ The man internally chastised himself again.

Alejandro then stood up and looked at you, “quieres bailar, Chiqui?” Want to dance? Alejandro’s hand shooting out to take your own.

“Can ye manage without a translator for a while?” You said, your gaze directly pointed at Soap.

“Aye, ye have fun, sis. But not too much.” Soap said with a wink as he pushed you and subsequently Alejandro away from the table. Sure he didn’t want to see his sister grind on a comrade’s thigh or any person’s thigh for that matter but you were a grown woman, and obviously you trusted the Colonel.

“Vamos a bailar, Ale” Let’s go dance. You said as the man joined you on the floor. His strong hand embraced your own gently as you wrapped an arm around his shoulder. His arm quickly found your lower back. He smiled at you as you both began spinning. The liquor made your skin buzz just barely as the music practically thrummed through your veins. You ignored the feeling of eyes on you as you assumed it was just the locals watching you dance with an infamous vaquero. Some of the older locals recognized your face from your time here before.

However they weren’t the only pair of eyes on you as you danced. Ghost slowly sipped his beer as the sounds of your giggles cut through the crowd. Your lips moved as did Alejandro’s as you murmured to each other while dancing. The man is unable to decipher any of it due to limited vision of your lips, lack of knowledge for the language, and the distance. He couldn’t help but wish things were different.

‘What the hell were you doing to him.’ He thought as he focused on Soap and Rudy. The two grown men laughed and caused a commotion as they shifted to battle stories.

The night continued on as more beers were ordered. You finally sauntered back over with Alejandro in tow.

“Rudy, agh. Ayudame.” Help me. Alejandro groaned as he made it to the table, playfully teasing you. You held two more shots in hand as well as fresh beer for the boys.

Soap recognized the command and looked worried for a moment until your quip came back as you pushed him into the booth just as Rudy rose to the occasion.

“Me invitaste a bailar. No es mi culpa que seas un viejo.” You invited me to dance. It’s not my fault you’re an old man. You rolled your eyes before translating. “Ale here forgets that his knees are getting rusty and he wants to blame me.”

“Ale?” Soap said with an eyebrow quirk which you answered with a look alone.

“Te respado, Ale.” I got your back, Ale. Rudy said as he bumped your hips with your own. “Chiqui, tú sabes que no es agradable pegar a un viejo.” Chiqui, you know it's not nice to bully an old man.

You shot the Sergeant Major a look as Soap, Alejandro, and Ghost took the fresh beer bottles from your hand. Your cheeks thrumming with a slight flush of warmth from the liquor coursing through your body.

“You sure you don’t want to take a break?” Soap looked up with concern.

“Oh she’s just getting started unfortunately.” Alejandro chuckled at you as you shared a shot with Rudy. The two of you walked off together, laughing as you shoved each other.

Ghost was suddenly washed over a feeling of jealousy as he watched you dance with your old teammate. Your hips grinding downward onto his thigh in perfect rhythm each time he lifted you up. A laugh leaves your lips as the man whispers things in your ear, his hand resting low on your back. In truth, Rudy was just constantly pulling down the back of your shirt to avoid your scars being revealed. A warmth blooms in your chest as you recognize the habit. But Ghost didn’t see it as that, how could he?

Why was it that you were so comfortable taking the mask off with these men when he had to force it out of you in a spar. Johnny even had to take a moment with you for you to soften up with him again and he is your own family.. What was so trustworthy about these men? Sure you spent two years with these men, bled with them, drank with them, you did it all. But you were his teammate, a member of his task force, not theirs, not anymore. All of these thoughts flooded his brain as he unknowingly gripped his beer tighter, his brows furrowing. Is Rudy the reason why you looked so stressed to come here? You just couldn’t bear the idea of your new team seeing how good you had it with your old one?

Johnny knocked his shoulders against Ghost to snap him back to reality.

“So how did you two manage to get so close to my sister? I haven’t seen her this carefree in a while.” Soap questioned. He hadn’t seen you this carefree since before you started being sent on missions abroad. That’s what he meant to say, but bit his tongue carefully.

“She learned to trust us just as she did you” Alejandro answered calmly as he sipped his beer. The cold beer easing the fiery ache in the older man’s body. Alejandro’s answer irked Ghost but he didn’t show it.

That’s the problem. You didn’t trust him. Sure you trusted Johnny but that’s your family. He’s your commanding officer, your superior, you’re in his care and yet you act like he’s going to suddenly snap whenever he’s around. You can barely hold his gaze or be close to him, meanwhile you can grind on your old teammate without any care and practically share the same breaths of air like it was the only oxygen left.

“And Rudy is the same?” Soap quirked up an eyebrow. Ghost listened closely and watched the Colonel. Alejandro let out a deep chuckle at the question as if a joke was said.

“Rudy and Chiqui are different from Rudy and I. I mean they’re different. Sure, Rudy is my right hand man but Chiqui spent a lot of time with him. They always had each other's back. I mean they used to leave base just to go dance alone at the bar after every mission. He taught her everything. I used to catch them staying up late practicing her Spanish as she taught Rudy how to throw knives. Then I would have to send them to bed and make sure they didn’t follow each other back to the same room.”

“How is that different?” Soap said, “I assume you also taught her something.”

“There’s a phrase we use to describe friends like them. Un amigo es el que intenta levantarte cuando te has caído. Si no logra levantarte, se acuesta a tu lado para escucharte” Alejandro paused. He translated first, having momentarily forgotten the Mactavish twins weren’t completely the same, and then continued his train of thought.

“A friend will try to get you on your feet when you fall. If he fails, then he will lay down on your side and listen to you. Chiqui went through a lot here, especially with this being her first team. She should’ve been sent to somewhere that could ease her into the fire. Instead she was thrown in like a rag doll. Rudy helped her adjust and they became close. I can confidently say they were best friends through and through.”

“Ye dinnae ken me Colonel. I’m asking if my twin has had any history with yer man.” Soap finally said, his look getting serious. Alejandro nodded, finally understanding what the shorter man was getting at.

“Jabón. Under the hot desert sun that plagues Las Almas, even the most clearly drawn lines in the sand can become easily brushed over. Now what your hermana tells you is her business, not mine. She may not be my soldier anymore or under my care, but I will still respect her boundaries. So if you want to know so badly, ask her.” Alejandro said, a serious look appearing on his face as well. The sergeant loosened up on his questioning. Soap could understand why everyone respects the man so much. Soap let out a deep sigh as he peeked at you and Rudy still dancing together. He turned his head back to the table and took notice of the grip Ghost had on his beer. Alejandro following the Scotsman's gaze.

“Todo bien, Fantasma?” All good, Ghost? Alejandro murmured, the two men looking up at him.

“Yeah, I just need a smoke break. Johnny could you scootch-”

“Yeah I got ye.” Johnny said as he let the older man out. Even the nosy sergeant knew not to push his lieutenant when he was this bothered. As Ghost walked out, quickly popping a cigarette and a light into his hands right as he passed through the entryway, exiting into the night.

You noticed Ghost leaving and faltered a step. Rudy noticed and gave you a look. His hand momentarily tightening on your back then relaxing.

“¿Qué pasó Chiqui?” What’s wrong? He whispered into your ear before noticing the way you faltered. The man silently prayed that you were finally done, but a realization passed over his face as he noticed the absence of the lieutenant.

“No pasa nada.” Nothing You responded quickly.

“Ah. El Fantasma.” he chuckled in your ear, a knowing tone to his voice.

“Cállate Rudy. No te metas en algo que no está ahí” Shut up, Rudy. Don’t interfere in something that isn’t there.

“Pero es la problema. No?” But that’s the problem, no? He shot back.

“Rudy.” You spoke roughly, your tone clearly drawing a line.

“Bien, como dijiste que no pasó nada” Fine, just like you said nothing happened. He said, dropping the subject just as fast as it came up. “Pero siempre puedes hablar conmigo, como en los viejos tiempos” But you can always talk to me, like old times.

“Ya no podemos ser como en los viejos tiempos. Solo somos amigos. Ambos estuvimos de acuerdo con eso antes de que sucediera.” We can't be like old times anymore. We're just friends. We both agreed to that before it happened. You whispered in his ear, a saddening note was attached to how you spoke.

Suddenly the liquor turned sour into your stomach and the ache of being on your feet for so long finally got to you. You slowly pulled back from the man with a look, both of you knowing that you were done for the night.

The man nodded, immediately understanding but a part of him ached at your allusion to the incident. He knew what incident you were referring to. That incident when they let you slip through their fingers like the sand that blows through Los Almas. The one time they couldn’t fail and they did anyway.

“Chiqui, siempre estaré aquí para ti” I’ll always be here for you. He said as you both removed yourselves from each other and walked back to the table.

“Yo sé, Rudy. Y siempre estaré aquí para ti” I know, and I will always be here for you. You nodded back.

“Finally done?” Soap smiled at you, knowing that tired look you had on your face. “I hope it was worth it.” He teased you.

“Oh it was worth it.” You nodded, “¿Estamos listos para salir?” Are we ready to leave? You questioned the men with a sigh.

“Finally. I was praying you’d let up soon.” Alejandro said as you all made your way out the door. Even as the moon was high in the sky, everyone could feel the fatigue ache into their bones.

Your eyes immediately scanned for Simon. The man illuminated in the moonlight as he stood next to the jeep. His cigarette long squished out into the ground below.

The ride back to base was silent. Ghost peered down at you as you held his gaze. Neither of you spoke as you took a moment to stare into his glaring blue eyes. You couldn’t understand what ruffled the man’s feathers but you wouldn’t press him.

A soft whine escaped your lips as you walked back to your room. Johnny followed in suit as he went into the room. Ghost stood outside the door, allowing his sergeant time to change and decompress. Ghost knew that Johnny was worried about you and his conversation with Alejandro eased some of his worries while heightening others. Just as he was about to turn in, he noticed a light was on in the room across from yours. He slowly stalked over to the door, standing right beside it and focusing in on the two voices.

“Estoy preocupado por ella, Ale. Ella se niega a abrirse a su teniente. Incluso su hermano no conoce la historia completa..” I'm worried about her, Ale. She refuses to open up to her lieutenant. Even her brother doesn't know the full events.

“Lo sé, Rudy. Pero lo que ellos saben es asunto suya. Quiero decir, si estuvieras en su posición, ¿serías diferente? Le tomó semanas abrirle a ti y luego, justo cuando mejoró, le fallamos. Ella estuvo atrapada aquí durante una semana con esos malvados bastardos. ¿Sabes las cosas que le hicieron? ¿lo que la hicieron hacer?” I know, Rudy. But what they know is their business. I mean if you were in her position, would you be any different? It took her weeks to open up to you and then just when it got better, we failed her. She was stuck here for a week with those evil bastards. You know the things they did to her? What they made her do?

“Sé exactamente lo hicieron. Yo estuve allí! ¿O has olvidado quién entró primero en esa habitación? Quién escuchó su gritos durante horas hasta que nos dieron permiso para entrar? ¿Quién llevó su cuerpo ensangrentado de vuelta a la enfermería? ¿Quién se quedaba junto a su cama todas las malditas noches porque se despertaba gritando como si nunca saliera de esa habitación? ¡Lo hice! ¡Lo hice todo! Yo estaba allí para ella cuando nadie más estaba. ¡Ni siquiera podías mirarla o estar en la misma habitación que ella! Tú eres el que dejó que ese General la robara de vuelta. ¡Sabías exactamente ese General que haría con Chiqui y sin embargo dejaste que sucediera.”

I know exactly what they did to her. I was there! Or have you forgotten who entered that room first? Who listened to her screams for hours until we were given permission to enter. Who carried her bloody body back to the infirmary? Who stayed by her bed every damn night because she would wake up screaming as if she never left that room? I did it. I did it all! I was there for her when no one else was. You couldn't even look at her or be in the same room as her! You're the one who let that General steal her back. You knew exactly what that General would do with Chiqui and yet you let it happen.

“Baja el tono, sargento mayor. No me viste detenerlo. Lo intenté. Pero él fue por encima de mí, a nuestros superiores.” Lower your tone, Sergeant Major. You didn't see me stop him. I tried. But he went above me, to our superiors.

“¿y qué hubiera pasado si hubiera sido Valeria en lugar de Chiqui? ¿te habrías esforzado más?” And what if it had been Valeria instead of Chiqui? Would you have tried harder?

He recognized the voices as Rudy and Alejandro but he couldn’t decipher it. All he knew was that they were talking about you. There was a long pause, something was said lower but Ghost couldn’t pick it up.

“Su hermano me interrogó sobre ti, mientras ustedes dos bailaban.” Her brother interrogated me about you, while you two danced.

“¿Jabón? ¿Qué quería saber?” Soap? What did he want to know?

“Tú relación con su hermana.” Your relationship to his sister.

“¿qué le dijiste?” What did you tell him?

“La verdad.” The truth.

“¿Todo?” All of it?

“No todo, pero algunas cosas están muy claras.” Not all of it, but some things are very clear.

“¿Como lo que?” Like what?

“Le dije que algunas líneas se difuminaron, pero sobre todo que eras su mejor amigo. También le dije que lo preguntara a ella porque el necesitaba escucharlo de ella, no de mí.” I told him that some lines were blurred, but mostly that you were her best friend. I also told him to ask her because he needed to hear it from her, not from me.

A deep sigh was heard as Ghost got closer to the door.

“¿Es por eso que Fantasma se fue?” Is that why Ghost left? The masked lieutenant tensed up at the mention of his name in spanish.

“Sí.” Yes.

“¿Quién está siendo metiche en mi puerta?” Who is being nosy at my door? Suddenly a pair approached the door. And it swung open, but Ghost was already gone.

“Rudy?” Alejandro spoke as he walked past the shorter man, standing in front of the entryway as Rudy stepped back into his own room.

“¿Mande?” yes/come again?

“Creo que ahora tienes una razón para temer a los fantasmas” I think you have a reason to fear ghosts now.

Author’s note - The girls are fiiiighting. I know I know. Lots of questions, and all will be answered in the upcoming chapters. I’m sorry I couldn’t resist reader being close with Los Vaqueros AND me getting an excuse to practice my Spanish. As always - I hope you enjoyed it! Reblogs, comments, and likes are all welcome!

My requests are open! Feel free to drop by and ask questions!

Masterlist / Pt. 1 , Pt. 2.

brother's best friend!simon riley is a man you shouldn't like

he's older, albeit a few years, but older nonetheless. you grew up around him, him being your brother's best friend. they never left each other's side, it felt like. attached at the hip.

you always had an eye for simon, the boy was alluring, quiet and reserved, but regardless, you wanted him. you couldn't have him though, with him being buddy-buddy with your older brother, he was off-limits.

especially since your brother is outright aggressive in his protections for you, he even got simon on the bandwagon. you deluded yourself into thinking simon didn't want any other guys around you, but came to the reality that he was just helping your brother out, as friends do.

but as you got older, the quick glances turned to lingering stares and prolonged eye contact across the room, with brief touches and grazes against arms or legs whenever you sat near.

every single time, you reminded yourself that your brother would have simon's head for even conjuring the thought. in simple fear for his life, you didn't do anything further.

now it's been years. your brother and simon went off to the military and got deployed. coming back home as hardened soldiers, your brother became closed off, silent. like a hermit, he holed up in his room, leaving the once joy-filled rooms empty with only despair.

it was like a void had been made in your heart, left only with the bulky man simon grew to be. sure, he had also seen some stuff, but he had had rough home life so he knew how to deal with it, to some extent, and it was the reason he spent so much time at your house in the first place.

slowly, simon filled the voids your brother had left, shushing you with hushed words that he's just doing what your brother would want. making you happy.

and it's exactly what he does, pounding into your tight warmth that drools over his cock. a creamy ring of arousal forming at the base of his length as he fully sheathes inside your pussy. his hand is rough against your mouth, cooing about how you wouldn't want your dear brother to find out how simon's filling you in a way he should've years ago.

yet his pace is brutal, the sound of skin slapping together, enough to turn it red, bounces off the walls, and you'd be surprised if your brother didn't hear it through the thin plaster.

regardless, he didn't relent, making up for lost years by making you orgasm more than what you could count before you quickly became stupid, drooling over his fingers and crying out his name, muffled only by the tight grip of his hand over your lips.

your brother will come around eventually, right? simon tells you that he'll accept it once he sees how happy he makes you, and you have no choice but to believe him.

【Ｌｉｍｉｎａｌｉｔｙ】

Damaged Simon Riley x Fem!Reader

Chapter 12 | I’m Cloudbusting Daddy.

Dark themes, references to past abuse. A PTSD freak out. Kinda hurt no comfort vibes? Take care besties.

You press your face into the cool tiles patterning your shower, feeling the water droplets forming random shapes against the thin flesh of your eyelids. It’s calming, the heat of the mist drenching your scalp, flowing in endless swirls around the drain beneath your feet.

It’s been weeks since the great revelations, since you opened the door to your anxiety for Simon and instead of retreating, he walked straight through. You’re glad he’s on leave actually, it’s given you time to process, move the relationship from one of faintly awkward strangers to the footings of a honeymoon period.

Without needing to verbalise it, you recognise that you’re both in deep now, the light above you reduced to a glimmering speck as you descend into dim and uncharted territory. You know he’s probably never spoken about some of the things he told you with anyone, the fact that he trusted you enough to reveal the difficult truth of his past means everything. It’s given you both a new footing you’re still navigating around.

The first time Simon slept in your bed, it felt like a big deal. A fucking big deal actually. You weren’t sure if you’d ever be brave enough to close your eyes around someone again, give them access to a space where you’re unguarded, vulnerable in the extreme. He stuck to his side of the mattress with almost rigid formality that made humour lodge in the back of your throat. Ironing board stiff and barely moving, shovel like hands folded neatly under his head, a side sleeper by all accounts, when you woke up he was still in the same position and the only indication he was comfortable was the change in his breathing, exhales of air expended from somewhere peaceful.

Slowly, like dream walking, Simon had gradually eased into it, until his hand laced with yours when it came time to turn off the amber light on your bedside table. That progressed to your head making it’s way onto his shoulder, or a leg being flung absently across his thigh. Shapes that gradually came together through the blackest night or in the early hours where the soft plumed birds chirp. With each passing day the awkwardness disappeared, until you realised your bed would feel entirely empty without his body there, even given the whistling snores he makes when he’s dozing through a nose broken more than once.

It’s going so well, it almost makes you uneasy. You keep waiting for him to show some sign of impatience with you, try and touch you somewhere that makes the wounds in your psyche flinch away, withdraw under the pain of previous caresses you’ve tried so hard to bury twelve feet deep.

But it never comes. Simon kisses you like a man fevered, possessed by the feeling of your lips against his, nips at your jawline and threads his big paws with your fingers. Steadily you’re recognising that perhaps Simon is more afraid of taking that leap than you are. The jump that involves acting on the slickness between your thighs after a particularly intense make out session, or acknowledging the hardness you’ve felt pitching in his black jeans.

In spite of your own anxieties, you’ve got to admit you crave that physicality with Simon. It’s stirred all sorts of excitement in you, the type that makes your stomach tense with anticipation, heat curling over your shoulders in waves every time he murmurs your name, slightly out of breath from long minutes wrapped up in you.

The water plunging from the spouts above you is turning lukewarm you’ve been in here so long. More than once you’ve taken a shower as an acute distraction from the overstimulation bought on by Simon’s presence. Slipping a hand between your legs to ease the ache he leaves, toying with your clit until a short and sharp orgasm blooms under your fingertips. Oddly, it leaves you craving more though, becoming less and less satisfying with each stolen moment.

A little frustrated, you shut off the flow. You both agreed you’d take things slowly, it’s needed, required even. You’ll have to shove batteries in your old vibe and sneak it into the bathroom. That should stave off the constricting desire that has you gazing at Simon’s broad back when you wake up before him in the mornings. The itch inside you to trace a palm over the corded muscle and sinew built there, press kisses to every scar. It’s a relief in some ways to be so attracted to him, when it’s been a while since frisson didn’t make you anxious.

“Oi.”

“Oi.” Simon replies softly, barely opening one eye, head resting against the sofa cushions. You can tell he’s awake though, his gravelled voice holds no sign of sleep. He’s always watchful, only rests in a light state of consciousness, sometimes waking if you move too much or twitch while you dream.

The tv show you were watching has long since finished, something else is playing. The hum of the dialogue onscreen washes over you, drowning out the negative voice inside your head. Simon’s black gaze is now resting on you entirely, slow blinking like a cat on the lap of an owner who dotes on it.

It’s now or never.

“Do you ever think about…” You pause, trying to bottle the shyness suddenly seeping into your body and making you clench your fists. “Trying stuff? Stuff other than kissing?”

Simon sits up and immediately you regret your statement. In his uncanny way you know he understands exactly what you mean. You get studied by eyes full of apprehension, something churning in the depths you can’t quite grasp, an undercurrent through a restless body of water that’s usually still.

“You don’t have to answer that! Sorry, forget I said it.”

Shit, now you feel awkward.

But Simon closes his rough fingers tightly around yours, the pad of his thumb brushing the inside of your wrist.

“Stop apologising to me.” He huffs, the scar on his lip tugged downwards in a stern line. But his severe stare starts to crumble at the edges, humour breaking through the cocktail of uncertainty in them. “M’tougher than I look.”

You snort at that, then hold his hand properly, sliding your fingers to rest on his knuckles, marked and sloping as they are. Flipping his hand to bring yours closer still, you notice something, a vibrant red, crimson smear on the thin skin just before his weathered palm begins.

“Is that lipstick?!”

“Yeah.” Replies Simon, looking utterly unabashed. You press a pad into the stain, garish against his fair colouring.

“Do I want to know why you’ve got red lipstick there?”

He shrugs, lips tilting up at the corners in a surprisingly boyish way. Simon looks like he’s been caught out in some amusing fashion, it piques your interest immediately.

“Si?”

The smirk grows a little wider, so you squish his hand in an attempt to extort the truth from him. It has all the affect of a breeze blowing against a large rock. He doesn’t even flinch, though you’re puffing.

“Tell me!” You lean all your weight on his hand which remains resolutely steady.

“Surprised it’s taken you this long to notice it actually.” He hums, watching you wrestling with him while his eyes crinkle happily at the corners. “Pinched your lipstick weeks ago. Wear it everyday.”

You gawp at him, momentarily distracted. Simon uses that to flip your hand and traps it vice like in his paw.

“I’ve been looking for that!”

“Bought you new ones didn’t I?!” He grins stupidly at the outrage on your features.

“You’re a weird guy Simon.”

“Know that.” Simon shrugs without batting an eyelid. “Reminds me of you. Thought you’d lose your shit if I got a tattoo, lipstick will do for now eh.”

Warily, you eye him, the sentiment is crushingly adoring and it should have you running for the hills. Instead you’re more than a little bit pleased he wants to keep a part of you with him, even if that did involve stealing your favourite lippy.

“Have you got any other tattoos? Apart from your arm?”

“Nah. Don’t like sitting for em. Tha’s why I only got a half sleeve. Never went back for the rest.”

You digest that fact, your brain making links in the pieces of information you have about him. He finds touch difficult sometimes, you know that already. Occasionally he doesn’t sleep at all and you wake up to him pottering around your flat like a helpful poltergeist, tightening loose screws and fixing dripping taps.

“Do you prefer piercings then?”

Simon nods slowly.

“Mm. Done those myself in the main.”

“You pierced your own tongue?!” Horrified you gaze at him, imagining how difficult that must have been to do without flinching.

“Pierced other stuff too. Just took em out when I got bored.”

“Like what?”

“Come ‘ere?” Simon murmurs, pulling you closer then patting his lap. He still frames it as a question, giving you the right to refuse at any moment, to pull back without consequences. Feeling bold, you clamber onto his thick thighs, as his orbs flit over your form.

“See how many you can guess.”

Steadily he stares up at you, big hands resting gently on your hips, the lightest touch that might as well weigh tenfold with how heated you’re feeling. Spread wide across his lap, feeling the stretch in your muscles as they accommodate the broadness of him. It would burn to take him, you’re sure of it, but it would be the best feeling in the world.

Carefully you examine his face, a few lines around his eyes, scars that criss cross through his ash blonde stubble, light lashes framing the obsidian orbs so tenderly observing you in return.

There’s a little hole shaped mark in the corner of his lip, two by both sides of his brows. A few more litter his ears. Quietly you let your fingers trace each in turn, while he sighs at the whispering touches. You tap his Cupid’s bow and tilt your head to add the little metal barbel inside his mouth to the list of sites. Then your hand trails the length of his jawline, down to his Adam’s apple which jumps as he gulps.

“Did I get all of them right?!”

Simon’s orbs look over-bright, black pupils a vortex in which to drown. His breath quickens, a pace to match his thrumming pulse. It’s innocuous, but you touching him so tenderly has roused something wolfish that can’t be ignored. Simultaneously he wants you to stop and go further all at once.

“More or less.” He concedes, leaning his throat into your touch until a thrumming starts to drive between your legs. Boldly you trace a peck over his T-shirt, the outline of muscles bunching under your caresses until he’s taut like a spring.

“Anymore round here?”

Your thumb finds the edge of his nipple and curves around it, feeling the peak while he shivers slightly. It occurs to you then and there that Simon could have more piercings in delicate areas unseen as yet, and the thought of that has your pussy fluttering with anticipation.

“I’ll tell you if you’re hot or cold.” He rasps, throat bobbing again. Is it just nerves? Or is he really so affected by a trailing touch?

Sinking lower, you stroke down to his navel, navigating his belly button with a quirk of your eyebrow. Simon inhales softly when you pause just under it, tentatively drawing little circles.

“Hot.”

You giggle, the vision of this giant of a man with a cute noughties belly bar is almost too much to handle. So carefully you’re now barely taking in oxygen yourself, your hand reaches the waistband of his jeans, resting on it with a feathery lightness that totally belays the amount of intoxicating want you feel for him. The incredible urge you have to undo the faded metal button and let down the zipper of his fly.

There’s a split second pause while your imagination goes into overdrive, contemplating one thousand different moves that would lead onwards to the place you’ve been fantasising about getting to with Simon.

That momentary lapse in observation is all it takes to miss that he’s frozen, no longer heavily lidded with lust, forearms straining and bunched with tension until the muscles look fit to burst through his flesh. All easy humour has vanished from his face, his eyes are burning like supernovas in their sockets, while his knuckles whiten.

Then seamlessly he’s on his feet, you’ve been deposited onto the sofa and he’s halfway into the hall. You barely have time to blink, to readjust to the change in position before you hear the bathroom door slam.

Shit.

You don’t know what to do, give him space? Is that the best thing? Or does he need comfort? Surely he wouldn’t have moved if he didn’t need alone time. Waiting for a beat you listen, it’s eerily quiet, not even the sound of the clock ticking over to midnight in the kitchen breaks the tension.

Shit, shit.

Anxiously you clutch your knees, wavering between going to check on him and the worry that might make it worse. Concern gnaws at you, along with rapidly rising guilt. You never even considered what level might be too much for him and that brings nausea to your throat.

The front door opens.

“Need fresh air.” Simon calls shortly.

It shuts with a finality that feels like a death toll, leaving you reeling a little in it’s wake.

Shit, shit, double shit.

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didn't see it cumming

bakugo x fem!reader

content: teen pregnancy, no angst

Your hands couldn't stop shaking, two pink lines staring back at you.

What were you going to do, you couldn't be a mother, you haven't even graduated from U.A yet. They say it only takes one time for accidents to happen.

Condoms were only 99% effective and you didn't think to take any birth control, but maybe you should've or else you wouldn't be hyperventilating looking at the pink stick, mocking you.

You put the test down, deciding to take a breather before you did anything rash. Sitting on your bed with your head in your hands as you tried to focus on breathing.

Bakugo and you were always careful, making sure he always wore protection and even when you didn't he always bought you the plan b afterwards for you to take.

Bakugo. What were you going to tell your boyfriend.

Even before dating you knew his ambitions and goal towards being number one. This wasn't part of his plans, this wasn't even part of your plans. Your mind raced as you thought of his reaction, he was always level headed with you, but that can always change, especially when you break the news.

Would he break up with you? Shout and call you names, blame you for ruining his future?

No, he wasn't like that, hot tempered and a loud mouth sure but he wouldn't put the whole blame on you, it takes two to tango.

Bakugo could probably smell your fear, not even a second later your phone started ringing with texts from the man himself.

"we still on for tonight?"

"your room or mine?"

"I know you're scrolling, don't ignore me."

Oh how you wished you could be freely scrolling, laughing at minor problems in everyone else's lives. In reality you were seconds away from dropping out and moving to Germany. If you could get into one of the top hero schools, then you could find a way to change your name and go into hiding, never to be seen again.

Staring at your phone, you didn't realize you never answered. The recognizable pounding on your door made your spine shoot up. Bakugo didnt wait for a response before entering, his griping about not answering his texts going unanswered as he locked your door.

As he faced you, you looked back at him like a deer caught in headlights. Wide eyes, glistening with unshed tears, as your chest raised with stuttered breaths.

Anyone with brain cells could tell something was wrong. He walked towards you, wrapping his arm around you as he waited for you to speak. Like he usually did when you were having a break down, but this time was different.

You could barely look at him, scared what you'll see in his eyes. Scared that his unconditional love will turn to hatred when you break the truth to him.

So like the coward you are, you kept your head down when you finally confessed, "I'm pregnant."

You felt his arm stiffen in shock, "what did you say?" he murmured. You couldn't hold it in any longer, the tears started rolling as you sobbed out, "im so sorry, I didnt mean for this to happen."

You cried into your hands, waiting for him to get out and leave you. But the warmth engulfing you made you think otherwise. He cradled you in his arms, your head pushed into his neck as he held you.

Bakugo was in shock, not expecting to hear his girlfriend tell him she's pregnant for another five years. He shushed you, trying to comfort you in anyway he can while trying to process the words you just uttered to him.

"I understand if you want to break up." you muttered. He snapped out of his thoughts, looking down at you in confusion. "Break up? Why in the hell would I do that?" You burrowed deeper into him, holding onto any sliver of warmth you could, "Cuz it wasn't in your plan to be a teen dad and now your career of being a hero is ruined."

Bakugo slowly pulled you away, holding your chin to look up at him. Your tearful eyes and flushed face looking adorable to him even in this situation. "Baby, that is the stupidest this you've ever said, and you've said some awful stuff." You couldn't help but give a sad chuckle at his jab. "You're not getting rid of me, not now, not ever. This is my responsibility as much as it's yours and we'll go through this together."

You wiped your nose, sniffling "But what are we going to do?" Bakugo wiped your eyes, holding your face in his hand, "Whatever you want to do, I'm with you every step of the way."

You smiled at his words, grateful that he was so understanding. Throwing yourself around him in an embrace, you held him tight, basking in his grip as he hugged you in return.

"What are we going to tell your mother." You murmured in his ear.

Your boyfriend's body tensed up, "Aw shit, she's gonna kill me."