Archangel Aziraphale Gets Gold Paint On His Face But It’s Just A Gold Egirl Heart

I’m starting to think I need to rewatch Umbrella Academy. How do I know? I’m getting compilations recommended on youtube

Izzy is that you?

I am a woman in the way that my favorite teacher said something that implied he thinks of me as a daughter figure

How come when Crowley’s driving on a long, straight stretch he goes slow enough that other cars can pass him, yet on turny roads he feels the need to swerve all over the place?

Perhaps he expects the sudden turning to cause a certain someone to slide closer….

Hear me out

*Nandor voice* Guillermo, get ready for something VERY ell bee gee tee to happen to you

While we like to joke about Izzy being in the wrong genre, I would argue that there are in fact at least five distinct genre universes in the world of Our Flag Means Death, and all of them have different rules.

Stede Bonnet, and his crew when they’re around him, live in a Muppet movie. I didn’t come up with this analogy but it’s so accurate. Insane physical comedy and comedy-action where no one really gets hurt. Mild peril but you know everything is gonna work out. Terrible puns and sight gags, but room for sweet, genuine emotional moments too. The rules of time, space, probability and logic will bend for a good joke.

Izzy Hands is in a grimdark action/drama where if someone gets stabbed in the gut they will behave normally and fucking die. (Probably slowly and painfully, of sepsis.) Crucially I think Izzy also lives in a genre where you can only be subtextually queer, and violence (done for or with or to each other) is the only acceptable form of intimacy between men. This is why being forcibly dragged into Stede’s world, where everyone is busy having silly low-stakes misadventures and being gay and emotionally available all over the main text–and seeing his Subtextual Boyfriend go into this world and love it–sends him round the twist.

The British, Spanish and other imperialist militaries are in a Master and Commander-style naval adventure where they’re the heroes. This is why they all take it completely seriously when Stede (unintentionally) kills Badminton and takes hostages, even though we can see that he bumbled his way into it ass-backwards. This is also why Stede is so shocked to get actually for real stabbed aboard the Spanish ship. (“Did you mean to do that?”) He didn’t realize until that moment that he’d stepped into a different genre. The stabbing is one of the first Surprise Genre Switch moments we get and in retrospect it’s very important for setting up that in this world, the threat of getting hurt or killed is very real–which we need to understand to know that there are real stakes much later, when Stede almost gets executed by the British.

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I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. The music choice in Umbrella Academy is incredible. The ability to make you dance while you’re favorite characters are about to get brutally murdered is a valuable skill.

Why is no one talking about “jiggery pokery”

I’ve not seen one singular jiggery pokery post

Why is no one adding jiggery pokery to their “tickety boo” and “wiggle on” lists?????

I am very careful about making sure that my sound is all the way off when I open apps just in case, so why is it that, with the sound all the way down, Spotify thought it a good idea to blast the Inside soundtrack at 7:30 in the morning?