✨Incorrect quotes✨
(Except they are real conversations that I or my friends had).
Wally: I'm going to kill myself.
Dick: Same.
Wally: ... Figuratively speaking, right?
Dick: Literally.
Wally: I'm calling your therapist.
Dick: You don't know my therapist.
Wally: Well, I'm gonna find them and then call them!
Dick: What's life without a little of risk?
Donna: A longer life.
Dick: ...
Dick: Who needs to live so long?
Random Socialite: You are just like your dad (Bruce). His genes must be strong.
Literally any of the Wayne kids (minus Damian): I'm adopted.
Tim, after going back to drinking natural fruit juice instead of five cans of Monster: I feel nutritious.
Bruce, after being told how handsome Dick is by like five people; completely confident and proud: Yeah, he got it from me.
Dick: I'm literally adopted.
Dick: The only thing I got from you is an addiction to using expensive sheets.
Tim, listening to loud music, knowing Jason was there and wanting to annoy him:
Jason, completely fed up with the world: TURN OFF YOUR MUSIC IT'S TOO HOT OUTSIDE.
Tim:
Tim: And what the hell does that have to do with it??? *proceeds to turn up the volume*
Annoying math teacher: Okay, students, do your math...
Dick: Do we do it mentally or can we use the calculator?
Teacher: Do it mentally with the calculator.
Dick, and probably the rest of the class: ???
Tim: I slept for 14 hours and I'm still sleepy.
Jason: Wtf. And I thought that sleeping 10 hours was a lot.
Damian: I don't know how you sleep more than 8 hours, you are lazy.
Steph: Let them enjoy their sleep. I can't even sleep 6 hours because of college.
Cass: 4 hours. Take it or leave it.
Bruce: At least you sleep more than 2 hours.
Dick: What the fuck did sleep mean?
Tim: I failed the natural sciences exam.
Dick: How? You said it was one of the easiest subjects.
Tim: It is!
Dick: So?
Tim: ...
Tim: I put "solar ecosystem" on the exam.
Steph: When I was little, we had to sweep the classroom at school, and since I hated sweeping, I pretended I didn't know how to do it.
Steph: Then, a classmate who always wanted to be superior, made fun of me, grabbed the broom and started sweeping for me.
Steph: She stayed sweeping the whole recess and I was able to go out and play without doing anything.
Dick: I'm so fucking proud of you.
Duke: What are you doing on the floor?
Dick, overstimulated because there is too much shit going: Floor time.
Barbara: You're autistic.
Barbara: Artist, I mean. Sorry, the phone's autocorrect.
Dick: We are having a face-to-face conversation.
(This is a bit lost in English, but in Spanish the words are "artista" and "autista", and they sound and are written in a similar way.)
Tim: Can we go to the sun if we go at night?
Duke: I swear they told me you were smart.
Damian: Who lied to you that way?
Steph: Which Hogwarts house would you be?
Dick: According to the test, I'm a Hufflepuff.
Steph: I've seen you angry.
Dick: Have you ever seen an angry honey badger?
Steph: ... Good point.
Dick: I take pills, everyday, so that I don't kill myself. 🎶
Roy: I'm dragging you to the psychologist right now.
Dick: We need an adult.
Garth: We are adults.
Dick: Responsible adults.
Roy: Normally you are the responsible adult.
Dick:
Dick: How the fuck are we still alive?
Wally West and Roy Harper are both in love with Dick Grayson
Send tweet -oh shit this is the wrong website
Okay I’m gonna drop an unpopular opinion here
I really
Really
Really
Hate the Jason and Damian met in the league and have a close brotherly relationship
I honestly think it detracts from BOTH of their development and makes both the characters a lot more 2D and boring.
And also I think it disrespects my GIRL Stephanie brown. Bc that close personal bickering, anything goes sibling shit? Yeah that’s Damian and Steph all the way.
And yeah I tend to credit Dick Grayson (bc he’s my boy) for a lot of the Growth Damian goes through. But Stephanie brown and him have the funniest sibling relationship in history
And I think to have as interesting of a development as Damian has had you needed characters like Dick and Steph to be his Batman and Batgirl.
Dick who I think we can all agree is objectively the least violent of the bats at a baseline (Richard crash out Grayson moments notwithstanding) as well as Steph. Both have angry moments of doling out justice but BOTH prefer rehabilitation methods and tend to be more mouthy and loud about their thoughts during a battle
Steph CLAWED her way up into her position, she fought for that and held on with an iron grip that left indents. She wasn’t as good as, Dick born acrobat Grayson, Barbara prodigy Gordon and Tim genius Drake. So she worked her ass off and FORCED people to pay attention to her and got good enough that she matches the rest of the bats on the field.
Dick HAS the experience of working with difficult cases. He’s lead teams his age filled with drama, infighting and death successfully, he’s trained kids younger than him successfully on panel.
He’s canonically a very adaptable teacher, who has strength in meeting you where you’re at and getting you to move to where you want to be.
Both these things helped Damian exponentially
Now let me be so clear.
Damian did the work.
Damian put in the blood, sweat and tears into changing his beliefs and perceptions of the world. But that would not have been possible if these two didn’t at least make it known that “hey you can be the kind of person who cares and still have value and not be weak and pathetic”
Damian going vegetarian/vegan bc of his morals, Damian choosing not to kill, Damian choosing to leave Robin, Damian making choices unrelated to mantles, regrets and vengeance. Is due to the fact that he had Dick Grayson and Stephanie brown as examples (now ofc Alfred was also very very very imp but I feel like no one ignores his significance so I don’t feel the need to add him here)
And Jason?
It also imo, FUCK UP JAYS DEVELOPMENT.
Bc if Jason could be this kind, empathic older sibling to Damian? WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK WAS HE DOING WHEN HE FIRST CAME TO GOTHAM? the way he treated the bats and the rogues gallery? Slaughtering all of blackgate to end up in Arkham, making dick watch him fall to his ‘death’.
No absolutely not
This is the ‘pit madness’ nonsense all over again
Jason had to see the world outside of Gotham and work with other people who were anti-heroes who fall into the category.
Bc Jason didn’t start out as an antihero
Jason was a full on villain with a grudge against other villains, he worked for the place he’s in. It’s bc of characters he interacted with, it’s bc of realizations he’s dealt with. It’s because he’s been a little too trigger happy in the wrong place and ended up looking at the grief he caused others and realizing he didn’t want to do that.
It gets rid of Jason realizing HE CAN work with his family.
It gets rid of Jason BECOMING a solid older brother to Tim and erases the Jason who WANTS to have a relationship with his family.
It erases all of the times he’s tried and failed and still got up and tried again
Both of them have grown bc of the people around them and I think if they had each other at that time it would’ve gone 1 of 2 ways
1) a toxic loop re-establishing bad beliefs and practices that damage both of them and leave them more resentful and stuck in their ways
2) they would’ve hated each other and tried to kill each other
In summary
-both these characters didn’t show up nice, they worked for it, don’t erase that
- don’t erase the characters that helped them grow (my girl Steph Brown being left out of conversations she started will kill me)
- Jason can have close relationships with the family im not saying he shouldn’t. I’m just saying that Jay is the cool older brother who very obviously loves you but was at college when you were a kid and now doesn’t really know how to interact with you and it’s awkward but you know you can go to him even if he isn’t your first call in most situations
- Damian was not a good person, he CHOSE to be that’s important to his growth. And with that growth came the ability to form the close connections he now has in canon. Without the growth he undergoes he wouldn’t be able to form the protective loving group of family and friends he has around him
- STOP IGNORING STEPH, I AM LITERALLY A DICK GRAYSON STAN ACCOUNT AND I AM OVERHERE TRYING TO GET CRUMBS OF MY GIRL OHMYGOD
- I would highkey love a short miniseries of Jason and Damian working together and developing a nice relationship both in and out of the masks but until we get that. I’m sticking to awkward brother that loves you but doesn’t get you at all
Also if you disagree/ have more nuanced takes on the Jay Damian sibling arc please leave in the reblogs and comments, I like hearing more nuanced takes and discussing just please don’t be a dick (hehe) about it
"as usual, nobody cares that dick threw jason in arkham right next to joker" ur right nobody cares‼️joker wasn't there + jason was a villain + arkham was the safest place to keep him. man got put in regular prison and killed nearly a hundred people. dick was right and he should do it again
I feel like there are 10 flavors of shippers in this fandom
- no you can’t ship that ship?? It’s so problematic (there is a 2 year age gap)
- yeah Bruce prolly fucks his kids who also fuck each other
- why are you shipping fanon?? Why does everything have to be gay?? Enough with the gay stuff
- problematic non incest ships (slade Wilson and Dick, Talia and Jason, Tim and Ra’s) I call this one the Freud would sell his soul to interview you tier
- stuck on one ship that hasn’t been canon in years or only happened in a tv show or else world story
- Batkids x miraculous ladybug or Danny phantom
- why love triangle when they can all hold hands (everything is a polycule)
-why love triangle when the women can just date each other and abandon the mediocre man (gayyay subgenre exists where the women leave their boyfriends to date each other and then the boyfriends also date each other)
- quietly ships current canon and lives their lives
-all queer ships, canon! Fanon! Who cares? Two bisexuals of opposite genders is fine but it has to have pizzaz
Tag yourself or add anything that I missed!
See one of my favorite things about fanon is that Dick is like a normal dude outside of nightwing like genuinely he’s normal person who isn’t that extreme canonically. He loves his family but he needs space with them and doesn’t want to be a carbon copy of his father.
He follows Bruce is moral compass while also being more lenient on some crimes. He canonically values life and protecting the sanctity over it than actually stopping crime and has a very strong moral compass that exceeds “well it’s the law”. Dick canonically thinks that Corrupt police officials are worse than criminals and became a cop to weed them out the same way he did the mob. And has bad blood with the BPD despite working for them.
He has genuine reservations about trusting Jason for obvious reasons even if you don’t like Dicks run as Batman where Jason was flat out the worst or like stealing the Nightwing suit in New York in brothers and blood. While still being able to work with and like him.
He is supportive of Tim while still being frustrated at taking on more work bc he knows Tim does too much and will need help.
He loves Damian but steps away from that relationship because unlike Bruce at his age he’s emotionally mature enough to realize he cannot be a parent for the kid. A role model sure! A big sibling, yeah. But not a parent.
He didn’t want Steph as spoiler, Robin or batgirl bc she wasn’t well trained but neither did literally anyone else. Once she and him started working together they had a decent relationship.
Dick and Cass have a strong relationship and he helped Babs with her when Bruce was being an asshole while still not stepping into a parent role bc he’s in his mid 20s and not going to do that actually.
And Dick believes Duke is going to become a big leader in the hero world and sees his potential despite not agreeing with the we are Robin thing.
And the fanon goes 1 of 3 ways
he’s fully uninvolved, doesn’t like the bats, has cut them off after trying to send Tim to Arkham, and abusing/ mistreating or co-signing the mistreatment of Jason. All his relationships with everyone except Damian have been erased. He ruined Tim’s trust, hated young!jason, has never spoken to Steph or duke and Cass doesn’t like him because she’s on babs side or in Hong Kong.
Or
Literally Bruce Wayne’s lapdog, says yes to everything with the worst case of battered women’s syndrome you’ve ever seen. Jason must stand up for him and protect him from the big bad bat/ the bats cut him off aswell after abandoning the bat movement (more rare but I’ve seen it). He doesn’t have critical thinking and his morals are identical to Batman’s and he refuses to question them. Will call the police on a homeless man stealing food bc it’s illegal. And has never tried to rehabilitate anyone including his friends, abandoned Roy and Kory bc of moral differences. He’s still a cop and doesn’t understand the nuance that Jason, Tim, Steph and Duke do.
Or
Dumb himbo, doesn’t know nothing except smile and nod. Pretty face, no brain. Has had one thought and it’s the fact he misses his siblings and needs his cereal oh wait was that two thoughts? He forgot how to count lmao. Babs or Tim will roll their eyes and do stuff for him bc he’s so dumb and sweet like a puppy who has had a lobotomy. :( doesn’t even have a college degree dumb silly teehee. Worst liar you’ve ever met everyone can see right through him hehe. He’s loves Bruce and calls him Dad 24/7 and uses nicknames for everyone.
And like it’s total flanderization
He has some of these traits sure, (more rigid moral compass, more willing to work with other heroes and delegate though this one literally only became a thing during Tom kings run and maybe a little bit after Donna died, in the current canon he went to Uni for business and dropped out, he’s not as good on the tech side as oracle)
But they’re just so exaggerated and I firmly believe it’s bc the rest of the bats are so extra. Like Tim trying to clone his dead bestie 99 times.
Jason goodness gracious I’ve been bamboozled let me try and kill the penguin on live tv
Damian my mother literally tore my spine out
. Duke let’s start a cult that’s something that isn’t dumb and won’t get us murdered.
And Dick is just there like… yeah fuck okay.
Like he’s still unhinged even for a superhero but he’s just objectively more hinged than all of his siblings like you’re telling me if TIM got the talon ancestry storyline shit wouldn’t have hit the fan??? The mother fucker who at age like 13 broke in Nightwing and starfire’s house, memorized all their schedules bc he’s the most insane stalker you’ve ever met. You’re lying and we both know it.
And everyone thinks their fave is the sane won and you are all just wrong I fear. I have already slandered Tim so I’ll do the rest for funsies
“Oh babs is the only sane one”
Bby Barbara is such a stalker with a need for control someone stole her tech and turned Gotham into a police state. If she decided that she wanted to go dictator she has a WHOLE setup for it. She’s also unhinged
“Jason just needs to get away from the bats then he’s the only sane one who the others go to for protection”
Yall Jason’s 2 biggest teams were
An Amazon, and a kryptonian
An arrow and an alien (also some times an Amazon)
So the league big three knock off and a titans knock off
He has also slept with his dad’s ex and 2 of his brother’s exes. Let’s not pretend that he’s being dragged back into the bat family, bro never left.
He wears a bat on his chest
He has a helmet with explosives in it… when he died in an explosion and fought with a crowbar when it was one of the major reasons he died. Let’s not talk about his whole thing with scarlet but the Morrison run had some weird characterization.
“Damian-“ no actually you can’t even start with Mr let’s go to Lazarus island. Let me adopt a giant bat monster bc my abusive childhood means I slaughtered his entire race. No actually I will not allow it. The fucker is unhinged and I love him.
“Steph” - you know what she is also my fave so everything she has ever done is justified and she has the best batgirl run and also her and Damian are hilarious. (She’s also the best female bat hands down I prefer her to both Cass and Babs for so many reasons I will not get into)
In summary this isn’t actually a criticism I find it hilarious plz keep going my darling fanon fanfic writers
Okay but imagine for a second
You’re Bruce Wayne, Batman
The richest, smartest man in every room you have walked into since you turned 20
Every bit of information is at the tip of your fingertips money, brawn and brains are no object
And then you take in a child
Named Dick Grayson
From the circus, who has the most flimsy proof of his existence you’ve ever seen with a birth certificate that looks too worn to properly make out the parents named without knowing them before.
No passport despite traveling all over the globe
No form of identification
So you give the kid an ID and everything is fine
He becomes Robin
Joins a team
Becomes nightwing
Runs all the teams
Becomes Batman
Runs himself into the ground
And then Dicks in his 20s and he’s sick
Really sick
It’s not viral, fungal, parasitic or bacterial
No one else you know has this
And he’s getting sicker
He can’t walk without help and spends all his days wrapped up in blankets fighting off never ending shivers.
He mixes up his brothers names and sometimes outright forgets some of the kids
He didn’t recognize Kori a few weeks ago and hasn’t remembered her since
So Everytime he blearily asks “who are you again?” They All answer with the knowledge that this might be the him decaying blue eyes don’t spark with recognition
The first time it happened it was horror and tears “an Oh my god! I’m so sorry I love you you’re my brother” over time it’s devolved into an “oh right…hi Jason”
And the doctors ask for his family history
Maybe. Maybe there is something that could save him, bring him back or stop this descent… this fall from happening to the most untouchable man that’s ever lived.
(Tim threw up after he saw Dick burst into tears, head resting on Alfred’s shoulder when he realized he couldn’t walk without help- they need to stop this)
So they dig
And dig
And dig
And nothing
There’s no evidence of the Graysons before John, the Lloyd’s before Mary.
Neither had been to a doctor anytime in the states at least
Bruce had redone all of Dicks vaccines once he acquired guardianship of him.
There was nothing
Nothing on his aunts or the uncle that was his namesake
There’s just nothing
Bruce realizes he doesn’t even know Dicks ethnic background. 1000s of tests he’s ran and he doesn’t even know if Dick has ever been to his parents home countries
They do every test they can come up with to try and fake a comprehensive family history
Mary Grayson was a fake name
So way John
They don’t know the real ones
Bruce finds out the mother of his son is Syrian and Romani and the boys first father is Afghani and Italian.
He finds out Mary’s father fled from Syria during the 60s and settled in Germany
He finds out that John Grayson and his brother were orphans together
He can’t even tell you which one of them gave Dick his blood type.
He knows everything
He’s the smartest man in every room he’s ever walked into
And he won’t be able to save his son
Because the boy who holds Bruce Wayne’s very heart in his hands knows that the best way to stay in the shadows is simply to show so little everyone will fill in blank spots with jarring inaccuracies so seamlessly they won’t even notice they did it.
They’ve called everyone
And Dick just keeps getting sicker
Dick: yeah I had a great night! Full eight hours
Jason: bullshit I saw you go to bed at 6 a.m
Dick: yep!
Jason: it’s 8 in the morning
Dick: yepp!! ❤️
Jason: wtf did you just talk out an emoji in real life
Dick: :D
Jason: …. Are you okay
Dick (got dosed with fear toxin and poisoned but is fine guys he checked the magic 8ball) Grayson: yep!!
Jason: *slowly backs out of the room*
I think Dick should be allowed to bite whatever DC character sexualizes him next :))))) as a treat :))))
Dickkory is genuinely my ride-or-die. I will start a goddamn riot just to have my parents back.
I can’t write romance for the life of me but I go on break soon and trust me I will write so much DickRoy DickKori and birdflash fanfiction because I am in my feels
I already have like 9 dick and Donna (platonic) fics in the works
(Also listen I get the whole red blue thing that fuels JayDick but how about you consider the fact DickRoy does the same thing but so much better and without the incest?)
1.-Dick Grayson/Jason Todd (8685)
2.-Dick Grayson/Wally West (4201)
3.-Dick Grayson/Bruce Wayne (3092)
4.-Dick Grayson/Koriand'r (3084)
5.-Dick Grayson/Barbara Gordon (2820)
6.-Dick Grayson/Slade Wilson (2700)
7.-Dick Grayson/Tim Drake (1691 fics)
8.-Dick Grayson/Damian Wayne (1400)
9.-Dick Grayson/Roy Harper (932)
10.-Dick Grayson/Raven (560)
This list doesn't include fanfics tagged with Dick Grayson/Reader.
Please don't comment hate messages, this post is purely informative. I don't want my notifications to be filled with ship wars/hate in general :ccc
I write bad Dick Grayson and TMA fanfiction on ao3 follow me @imtired_likerllytiredI literally keep creating and deleting accounts on this hellsite lurker since age 8
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