Witch Of The Ocean Deep’s Teensy Giveaway!

@ all the people unfollowing me during eurovision

I think the biggest misconception abled people have about disabled people's pain is that it feels like normal pain everyone has felt before, and that you can get used to it and grow a tolerance like normal pain.

ITS NOT LIKE THAT

Here's an example, when I was 12 I got a daith piercing in my ear, It was the worst pain I had ever felt. I felt like someone was trying to crush my skull.

Then I became disabled, And that became the worst pain I ever felt. My joints felt like they were literally on fire almost constantly for over 3 years. It NEVER felt less painful.

Last year I had to get my daith repierced, it felt like a tiny pinch.

The constant chronic pain I feel has increased my tolerance for normal pain, but you cannot increase tolerance for chronic pain. It is always excruciating at worst, very uncomfortable at best, the pain never hurts less. You just learn how to accept it and strengthen your mind enough to think past the pain. YOU CANNOT GET USED TO CHRONIC PAIN. That's why we can't "push through it", or "toughen up". It's not normal pain, your brain is literally confused and forces you to feel pain because it thinks you're extremely injured.

Imagine burning your arm on something reeaaally hot, now imagine the burning sensation you feel is inside your muscles and joints and not on the surface on your skin, now imagine feeling that 24/7 and you can't get rid of it. That's what I'm dealing with man. Do you abled people get it now??

I love spoon theory bc you can literally explain it exactly the same way it was originally explained, with actual spoons.

But also I feel like the failing phone battery is more accurate lately.

Like, you charge it all night, but it only slow charges. It never gets to full battery anymore.

When it says full battery, it doesn't mean the same as everyone else's, because it'll be gone twice as fast.

You have to limit your app usage bc of the battery drain, and even when you aren't doing anything the percentage is slowly going down.

Keeping it plugged in full time to charge means you can use your apps longer, but since it's slow charging it'll eventually reach 0 even when plugged in.

Keeping it plugged in full time also means the battery gets reliant on being constantly plugged in.

Actual percentages are a lie.

That shit will turn off with 5-10% battery still showing and there's nothing you can do about it.

Just made an account on Medium so I could read this. Made it about 1/3 through and I'm absolutely hooked and excited to finish it!! But first, time for a nap.

For the longest time, I have had trouble understanding FND - specifically whether it's just a shitty diagnosis made up by the medical system to gaslight people or if it's a genuine medical condition. This essay is rly helpful and has already broadened my understanding. It's incredibly well written, particularly bc of the extremely thorough research it's a result of

Medium

Cadenza for Fractured Consciousness

A Personal History of the World’s Most Misunderstood Illness

I am one of the most medically examined people in North America. For over a decade, no one could explain why I lost my ability to walk, speak, and use my hands. Why the lightning-like headaches? Why the ringing in my ears? Test after test came back negative. Doctors thought I might have a genetic abnormality no one's ever seen before, or a condition so rare that it had previously escaped medical classification. Then I got accepted to the top undiagnosed disease research program in the world, and they told me the only diagnosis I was unprepared to hear: it was Functional Neurological Disorder (FND), a much-misunderstood condition which was once known as Conversion Disorder, and before that, as Hysteria. And that was only the beginning of things getting weird. The essay above is the product of three years of research into the history, neuroscience, and politics of FND. It touches on the many medical failures that define the history of the disorder, the pervasive sexism and lazy mind-body dualism that prevented scholars from seeing it clearly, and why - finally - a better understanding may be at hand, with revolutionary implications for how we understand human consciousness and the experience of having a body.

FND fucked my life up. This is my reply. Thanks for reading.

disabled people should be allowed privacy. visible disability isn't an invitation to demand personal information from someone. and disclosing disability isn't an invitation to lay out each facet of that disability in excruciating detail. someone having a medical episode deserves privacy even if that episode happens in public. someone who is disabled and struggling or taking a break deserves to refuse people offering help without having to explain why. a disabled person who mentions some things about their disability but not every little thing is under no obligation to explain anything more than they already have. disabled people don't just deserve basic rights. they deserve dignity and grace and respect. and they deserve privacy

It's crazy how you have to choose to be different and then once you do it's not even over - you have to choose it again and again forever and yes one day it will feel so natural you don't even notice it anymore but there is no short cut to there, just willpower and repetition

Do you think it's better to fail at something worthwhile, or to succeed at something meaningless?

“We all looked up” by Tommy Wallach

if you ever feel like you're not "smart enough" for STEM or didn't do that great in school, i just wanna let you know that i failed algebra 2 THREE TIMES and dropped my high school physics class the FIRST WEEK...

and NASA chose me to student research with them.

so what i'm trying to say is that STEM is for EVERYONE. if school wasn't the easiest for you and you're not the strongest in math, don't let that stop you from pursuing STEM. working hard for goals makes you a great scientist.

screw that stereotype that all STEM majors are geniuses who were building robots and knew how to work a microscope at 3 years old.

STEM IS FOR EVERYONE! BECOME A FREAKING SCIENTIST! YOU CAN DO IT!