I Think This Is Why I Love TOT Dudes So Much. They Appear A Trope But Instead, Are A Full Exploration

Tried writing a poem after three years.

unpopular opinion after finishing 2.5 books: shatter me was entirely ass and hot pile of garbage. The only good thing being aaron warner.

finished shatter me book 1 in half a day and my brother stared at me like i am a lunatic. My mother taunted me about studies. Fantastic.

idk man, the fact that skip and loafer cares to differentiate between attraction to someone because you like them as person, attraction as friend and attraction as lover feels pretty neat ngl. tell me another manga which does that?? you cant.

"good things come to those who wait around"

and i have been waiting around forever, where are the good things. is there a glitch hello

HELLOOOOOOO

brain: hey sweetie. lets stop this, okay? its not working out. maybe this isnt your cup of tea. a smart person knows when to stop.

me: okay.. *considers stopping and quitting the thing*

brain: you fucking coward. you are giving up in between and running away. you idiot, you moron- you just dont wanna see through it. you fucking dumbfuck.

me: .....

"Hope comes so naturally to you."

I read this line over and over again and sometimes I wish, it didn't. Sometimes, I wish hope didn't come easily to me. Sometimes, I just wish your comforting nihilism and words of how it shall all turn to dust either way appealed to me naturally.

I walk around this world and as I grow, I learn more of it. I see the destruction, the ruins we send our environment into, the hatred that spreads like a deadly poison, the bigotry, the complete breakdown this economy is having around us, the rich become richer and the poor only grow poorer. The divide, the ignorance, just the sheer amount of misery-- Misery. The common affliction to human condition.

And yet, I hate to think, 'Nothing will change'.

It would be *so* easy to. But I cannot.

Because I don't know what happens next-- then how can I say it never changes? Never will?

We don't know what will happen to everything.

What do we know?

That it will all eventually turn to dust.

Might as well turn to dust bearing some hope. Trying what little we can, bringing change in the little corner of the world. Maybe, just maybe the world will learn.

Because if it all ends, then what's the harm in hoping?

There are two ways you can live your life-- as the ignorant one. Ignorance is, in itself, bliss. To never let yourself be aware of the wretchedness of it all.

And as the aware one. To be aware, to be conscious, to be critical and slowly feel yourself become jaded. It is the more painful way.

But if history stands as evidence, it is the critical one who challenged the status quo. The critique who dares to hope for better has always been the one bringing change.

"I look around and see the misery. I look around and can't help but be aware of the futility. But I still clutch kindness closely to my heart. I still hold on to humanity and its dynamic ability to change. I still hope.

Because to hope, is to live.

And to live without hope, is to live a miserable life."

Re: Hope might come naturally to me, but even if it did not, even if it stopped being the case- I will still choose it.

Do you ever have a mood like "I will change the world, work my ass off" and next second you are like "its just 1 life, I should live it to fullest" and just proceed to watch TV for hours.

being a stem major with high love for humanities feels like being in a business marriage with a rich high class wife and having a constant affair with a dark academia mistress

Reading Jane Austen and thinking, 'woah. Fresh breath, the way she writes romance. Love as not just an emotion, but a choice. Kindness being the most precious qualities.' And then realizing her stories are centuries old.

Her works were way ahead of her time. They understood what most people still fail to grasp these days. Just. Timeless.