Somebody Needs To Convert This Into A Fanfic...

somebody needs to convert this into a fanfic...

Christen is cruel if she purposely chose that yoga retreat so that Tobin would be forced to finally do yoga with her after saying no for so many years 😭

She’s trying to make Tobin more flexible isn’t she 🫣 😏

Tobin's Yoga retreat diary

Day 1:

This is humiliating.

Christen's ass looks awesome in yoga pants.

I'm not allowed to sleep next to Christen.

I guess the goal of this retreat is to get flexible enough to spoon yourself.

Day 2:

I Googled, "why is my kidney itching after Yoga". The results did not cease my worry.

Teacher said i have a weak Cobra. I don't know what this means but Christen smiled when the teacher said it so i don't think it's deadly.

Day 3:

Scoped out the place, the guards take 5 minute meditation breaks every 2 hours. Escape plan has been hatched.

Christen wanted to do a guided meditation with donkey's.

It's hard to meditate when a donkey poops on you.

Day 4:

I sneezed during meditation.

The stares that followed unlocked a new fear in me.

Christen's kisses are the only thing keeping me alive.

Day 5:

Tried to escape yesterday.

It did not go well.

I punctured a lung.

Guards put me in the meditation pit.

They lower down food twice a day.

Day 6:

Got spooned by a naked mole-rat.

Christen got jealous and demanded i be released from the pit.

I build a fire pit for us.

Only injured 6 fingers and 3 toes.

Day 7:

TOBY IS FREEEEEE

Injury update

Back is still aching Fingers and toes are sprained Got naked mole-rat fever Lung still punctured Kidney's still itchy Broke three ribs trying to spoon myself