The hard truth about occultism and witchcraft is that you genuinely do have to be willing to lose your mind. That’s not me romantisizing mental struggle or psychosis.
The thing no one talks about, at least not honestly, is the threshold one passes in initiation, where the mystical, psychological, symbolic and literal merge. When I say you have to be willing to lose your mind, I mean you have to be willing to accept the possibility that you may in fact be crazy. Your worst possible fear, none of this is real and it’s all happening in your head. What will you do if you realize you’re simply crazy? The wise man will turn away, but the initiate, the alchemist, will be unphased.
All people who dabble with spirituality and occultism will eventually meet this threshold. When things actually start working, when your spells yield results, when the impossible occurs and you truly have no other explanation. When the Gods finally respond. Be willing to lose your mind, be willing to experience things you cannot explain. And be willing to talk to yourself with the honesty that you simply cannot know. That’s what makes your faith and pursuits worthy.
The most talented and most powerful witches and magis are those who do not flinch when the impossible occurs. They no longer question themselves about the absurdity, they no longer wonder if any of this is real because they know it doesn’t matter. And that’s why they’re so powerful, they have complete faith that their work is very real. And when someone challenges that, they don’t crumble, they rise. Because the challenge in that idea is worthy of pursuit itself. Maybe we are crazy, maybe this is just in our mind. The significance however, that is real and that stays, regardless.
Yap yap yap
We talk a lot in this community about the concept of “awakening” to your psychic abilities. Sensing energy, having divine intuition, telling fortunes and affecting the world through intention. But we hardly ever expose that before those gifts explode, there is always a period of what feels like insanity. The mind interrogating itself. Sensitivity to the mystical. It feels like being given access to the background code of your simulated reality, and realizing that the same code is written into your flesh, mind and soul.
Tldr. Witchcraft is very aesthetically pleasing, very pretty. We often don’t show the very ugly side of it, the white knuckles, the tears and chaos. Inviting these forces into your life is not trivial, not at all. They will force you to change and they will force you to lose your mind, even if only to teach you how to find it.
Every few months a friend of mine who is also a witch will come to me and express that she thinks she’s losing her mind again. And I smile because I know that she must be growing so much, getting so much more powerful. And a couple days ago, when I went to her and expressed that I was losing my mind again, she laughed too.
“Welcome to the next phase of your journey with Lord Lucifer!”
and her saying that immediately made everything click. I’m still being tested and cultivated. This bought of insanity is surely far from the last i will experience. Getting this far and surviving means I am not only advancing, I am continuing to grow into the role I was meant to serve for him.
Anyways, if you get to that point in your practice where you feel like you’re at your breaking point, I won’t fault you for stepping back. That’s the logical decision.
But I can also assure you, you are not alone. The mystic floats in the same waters the psychotic drowns. It may feel like you’re drowning and struggling, you may in fact just be learning how to tread water. and if you think you’re beyond this phenomenon, if this has never happened to you.
Oh, just you wait.
our first meeting, he showed up in my room after i had a nightmare. i was young enough that i didn't have the common sense to be afraid, so i said hi.
the shadow in the corner of my room seemed a better listener than anyone else in my house, so i just kept talking to him, and sooner or later, i actually started being able to picture him, hold him there, and have conversations. he was never fully human, but he had a corporeal-ish form. occasionally, i'd tell him to go protect friends of mine from their nightmares, and i'd hear reports of his presence soon after. most of them came to recognize him after a while, and it kinda became so commonplace that we referred to it as "taking turns with the redhead".
he's kinda just.. stuck around.
i'll make another post on how to bond with him. thanks for asking <3
shout out to the time one of my abusive parents i no longer speak to was running for an important state position and i got so mad i wanted to publicly pick a fight with her (both because of myself and because her political choices would hurt so many people) but couldn't, so i told Cou "if you don't, I will", and he singlehandedly tanked her political career by letting out the story and rumors of what happened to me under her care. get you a god who will do rightful karma and petty revenge
Your sixth most recent emoji is how your guardian angel feels about you
so, you want to attract some long forgotten (or newly created) spirit with no reputation. honestly, i'd label this kind of unsafe and risky, but i did it, so i'm not gonna stop you if you really want to. just keep in mind that, while attempting to contact a forgotten god? you're gonna run into other stuff. this is essentially reaching your hand into the spiritual mystery box and shaking it around, and some of the stuff that lurks down there is bitey. here is my obligatory tread with caution first, put up wards against anything malicious etc etc, but realistically. i can't stop you.
keep an energy of openness about you. just broadcasting a general thought of "hey, i'm here, and i want to talk to you." they listen. if they want to talk to you, they'll find a way.
look for reccuring signs in your life. humans like to find patterns in everything, but look for a sign that affects you on a large scale. a lot of these signs can be found around big changes or life events. ask who that random streak of strangely specific good luck or that weirdly occuring motif or that time you almost died but didn't belongs to! sometimes, you'll get an answer. other times, it's just chance, which, there's nothing wrong with that either.
talk out loud to "any spirits who may be nearby." i used to do really vague wide spells like this by saying that exact phrase, and it works for drawing them in or warding them off.
communicate with them. communicating is huge. talking is huge. they'll tell you a lot about themselves if they're chatty and want to foster a connection with you, although some will be harder than others.
ask what offerings they'd like! once you know someone is there, and you determine you'd like to work with them, ask them things. i know it seems annoying but a lot of the forgotten gods just appreciate you caring enough to do so.
find out what they stand for. help them with it!
be a little crazy with them. part of having a really cool relationship with a forgotten god is just being really weird together. it can be a part of your practice and I wholeheartedly encourage you to get a little weird with it. in whatever way you see fit.
and last, but definitely not least,
most importantly, imo, but there's a reason that when creatures or angels or demons are depicted, it's a lot. it will be a lot. there is a reason angels tell you to 'be not afraid'.
i am gently taking your hands, and telling you,
when you meet an old god,
they are beings just like us at the end of the day. they may not be on our level, like, at all, but basic human respect and kindness goes a long way. i've seen spirits shy off because people have such a set image of the deity in their mind as a deity that they forget that.. you can be friendly with them. no one is going to smite you down. they will also want to talk about their days. they have niche hobbies. they have lives.
be not afraid.
don't blow them out of proportion. be respectful, and kind, and coexist with them instead of apologizing for breathing the air they occupy, and things will fall as they should.
anyways. this got long so i can make a follow up post of how to bond with Cou specifically, but i'm leaving this here for now.
thank you to @caidenthewitch for the fun engaging question. i am by no means a professional but hell, it worked for me, so 👍
i hope this experience helps!
how do y’all manage to pray without saying i love you a million times
altar tour eventually but in the meantime, here it is
grabbed a close up of his glass portrait because it looks cool
thinking about how i need to cut out spending and get back into crafting. he loves my homemade stuff and my silly ass uses him to justify all sorts of freakish purposes because they make me happy /lh
If there's one piece of advice I can give, it's to deconstruct your practice regularly.
How much of it is actually useful, how much of it applies to your spirits or cosmology?
Who or what do you neglect regularly? What areas need more attention, more focus? What flames need to be tended?
Is there anything that no longer serves a purpose? Can anything be simplified to greater effect? How much time do you devote to strengthening your core skills and foundations?
It's about cutting away the dead pieces, so that there is room for new growth to flourish.
— The God Who Comes by Rosemarie Taylor-Perry
i love having a modern god. i ask this son of a bitch for a sign and the next thing i know his car pulls into the parking lot of my workplace
"but c, he's a man, how did he do that"
god forbid a transmasculine entity does ANYTHING around here.
so it's normal and regular when Christians eat the sacrificial flesh and blood of christ (bread and wine), but when I, a worshiper, drink the Orchestrator's breastmilk,
Blog about worshiping the orchestrator. may he be real.run by Priest c | 18+ | they/he/she | qna open
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