Peter: Harley Said He Doesn't Love Me Anymore

Reblog if you’ve ever been personally victimized by Pikachu man.

Laser Tag

PETER PARKER x HARLEY KEENER

Summary: What do you get when you put Peter and Harley together? A fucking gay disaster.

A/N: This is honestly super cute so I hope you guys like it. This is my first time writing for Parkner so please go easy on me and just letting everyone know that I absolutely butchered Harley’s southern accent so I’m extremely sorry.

Warning: Kissing. Two boys kissing / Gay couple. (🏳️‍🌈). Swearing.

Word Count: 880

Harley stared at the plastic gun in his hand, the blue light in it making a slight whirring sound. He let out a small groan as he looked back up at the dimly lit room, the LED lights glowing along the top of the ceilings in bright colors. He had no clue why he’d agreed to this. Maybe it was because of the puppy eyes that his boyfriend had pulled or the the way Peter’s bottom lip had jutted out slightly but now here he was, suffering for the joy of his lover. But I mean- wasn’t that what every relationship was? 

Sighing, he gently padded out of his hiding spot, quietly walking toward one of the towers, head whirling around every few seconds to makes sure there was no one around to shoot him. There were two teams. Pete, Ned, and MJ on Team Red. Him, Nebula, and Shuri on Team Blue. Smaller than your average laser tag teams but it still worked. Climbing up the ramp, he ducked down behind one of the windows, peeking his head up through the rectangular hole every few seconds to see if he could spot any blurs of red. When he spotted the familiar brown locks of Ned, he steadied himself, aiming at the red sensor on Ned’s chest and shooting. When Ned burst out in a few curses and walked away with slouched shoulders, he laughed a little to himself. Maybe this wasn’t too bad. 

Peter’s head was pressed against the black foam wall, curls a mess. His breath was slightly labored, eyes focused on the ceiling as he pressed the button on the side of his gun to reload it. He was the last one on his team, MJ hit by Shuri and Ned hit by Harley. He’d been able to hit Nebula but the other two were out there looking for him. Walking carefully over to a dark corner, he tried using his Spidey powers to his advantage, eyes already seeing much better in the dark than an average human.

When he saw Harley’s figure approaching him, Peter immediately brought up his gun, preparing to shoot but when he saw Harley’s arms go up, showing that he was surrendering, Peter dropped his gun down just a bit. What?

“Hi darlin’”, Harley drawled, his southern accent seeping through.

“Uhh…hi?”, Peter’s voice was quieter, softer. His head turning around to see if there was a tower near by where Shuri was waiting to get him. Harley’s own gun was hanging loosely by the trigger guard on his finger, carelessly swinging.

Harley took note of Peter’s frantic behavior, “Shuri’s on the other side of the arena sweetheart.” 

Pete didn’t look convinced, “Mmhhmm.”

When Harley took a step closer to him, Peter brought the gun back up slightly, eyes hardening and giving his boyfriend a quizzical look.

“Your not gonna shoot me, are you luv?”

Peter hated that his insides were melting. Harley was doing the thing. Honestly, fuck his boyfriend. Harley knew that his accent was Peter’s weakness. And his eyes. Hair too. We can probably through lips, body, and personality into the mix while we’re at it. 

Snapping out of the little lovestruck thing that was going through him, Peter glared at his boyfriend. “No. We’re not doing this right now.”

“Doing what, plum?”, Harley asked innocently. He was still walking towards Peter, albeit a little slower…but still.

“The nicknames and the accent and all…that.”, Pete gestured vaguely in Harley’s general direction. “You have to stop.”

“Is it working?”.

“Umm…no?”, Peter didn’t know why he bothered lying when he knew that Harley could see right through him. 

“No?”, Harley was close. Like really really close. Peter’s breath hitched as he took a small step back, his back pressed to the wall. Harley followed.

Pete gulped, “No.”

“Are yah sure?”.

Peter was eye level with Harley’s chest, the blue sensor practically mocking him. Glancing up, flushed pink lips met his gaze before hitting bright blue eyes that seemed to dilate slightly underneath his eyes. Why were his lips suddenly chapped? His throat felt like sandpaper, he needed water. Harley’s breath was warm against Peter, he smelled like sweat and something sweet. He smelled like home. One of Harley’s arms came to rest on the dark wall, the left of Peter’s head.

Pete cleared his throat, eyes on Harley’s lips, “Wha- what did you ask?”

Harley couldn’t help the small grin that enveloped his face, “Hhmm, nothin’ important.”

Leaning down, Harley’s lips gently encased his boyfriend’s, lips softly moving against each other. Peter’s hands instinctively wrapped around Harley’s neck, fingers entangling themselves in soft curls and ever so often tugging at the dark golden locks. When Harley ran his tongue over Peter’s bottom lip, asking for permission that Pete easily granted, Peter let out the smallest whimper.

Harley felt the tiniest bit guilty for what he was about to do next but they were playing Laser Tag with freaking Spider-Man, they needed to play dirty. Quickly and swiftly pressing the gun against Peter’s sensor, he pressed the trigger. 

Peter just sighed and gave Harley a look as Shuri’s cheer echoed through the room. 

“Sorry?”, Harley asked. He did feel bad for taking advantage of his boyfriend but…yeah.

“I fucking hate you, you know that?”

“I love you too darlin’”

That is the closest I’ll ever get to writing smut. :/ But yeah, anyway. Please reblog and like if you enjoyed. I hope all of you have a great day!

Listen, for people wanting to call out colonialism, there are way too many of you mocking Irish, Welsh, and Scottish names.

No, they’re not alphabet soup, no they do not look like “you’ve thrown letters at a wall and used what stuck,” they are living, breathing languages which we did CPR on after the British Empire shot them.

Like, people DIED to keep them alive.

Every time I see some (English/American) interviewer make an entire segment forcing Saoirse Ronan to list off Irish names, I die a little inside. It’s particularly galling to see the same people ooh-ing over how “mystical” they sound, or claiming ancient heritage to us.

Realise there’s a world beyond your myopic lens and just accept sometimes you’ve got new stuff to learn. Fuck knows I do.

I need a wrong number fic but instead of it being Reg and James or Sirius and Remus, it's Regulus and Sirius re-uniting years after not talking since Sirius ran away.

Ima firm believer that Peter, James and Marlene grew up together and act like siblings. Marlene is obviously the oldest, James is the middle child and Peter the youngest. And that Peter and Marlene team up to bully James on things like crushes. Or the Marlene is protective over Peter and James. And Peter and James gave Dorcas the shovel talk but Dorcas just nodded along amused cause she's heard all the embarrassing stories about these two from Marlene.

I’ve gone to the women’s restroom a lot in my life, and not once have I ever seen genitalia besides my own while there. No penis, no vulva, nothing.

I’ve literally seen a bathroom full of baby lizards, one time a whole fucking fish on the floor, and someone come out of the stall with a plate, knife, and fork like they just ate a meal before I’ve seen genitals. Why would I ever be worried about seeing some woman with her cock out

Best interview ever

The Sun & Wayward stars by TheBiButterfly has me kicking and squealing omg i loooooove jealous James

NASA released the clearest pictures yet of our neighbours in the solar system

Oh and of course us

Honourable mention

If you would like

Remus and James Brotp?

omg-

i-

i’ve waited for this for so long

hyping each other up all the time

although remus is not a quiddich freak (take example james!) he goes to the pitch and cheers on him all the time

james sometimes does remus’ essays if he doesn’t feel good (mentally or because of the moon). he gets caught almost every time but it’s worth it

do their homework together

weirdos 💖

hold hands sometimes

when james is too caught in stuff (cough cough quiddich cough) he forgets to study and exams come and “oh shit i forgot to study”. remus takes advantage in this and that means? study dates!

since james is one of the kindest persons towards him he has the feeling he has to protect him

and blamed himself for james’ death because he couldn’t protect him

so talk shit about james and say good bye to your life

vice versa too

james does everything with so much enthusiasm and it always brings poor re a smile to his face

you know for sure remus has that type of period in which he still wonders why sirius is with him and “look at him james, and then look at me”

james is not taking this crap

“moony you bastard, you are amazing, smart and even despite everything you went through you’re so kind and that means a hell of a lot“

both are huge simps

remus wanted to get a tattoo for sirius and james came up with the idea (don’t ask me what is it because i didn’t settle on anything)

despite not being a romantic in his own relationship, like sirius, remus gives james advice for his own relationship

and so does james, because sirius is james’ brother and shipping prongsfoot is basically incest but let’s not get into depth and he knows what sirius likes

both are clothes thieves and steal from each other because their clothes pretty much suit each other mostly remus’ suit james

james was so excited to become an animagus

they made the research of the spells for the marauders’ map (sirius did the graphic and peter brought snacks, which is very important mind you)

sometimes they just leave for like,,, two hours,,, and don’t let anyone come with them and no one knows where they’re going (p.s- you’re not gonna know either 👀)

james brings tiny bits of confidence from remus and remus brings back james down on heart when he soars too high