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She can’t be stopped

Yawning Portal Buttermilk Biscuits

While the inn’s undisputed main attraction is the cavernous portal that descends straight into deadly Undermountain dungeon, these famed biscuits are a close second. - Heroes’ Feast, p. 31

I’ve always wanted to make biscuits, but was never motivated enough on a Sunday morning to take the time to prep and clean my bread board to knead dough. So, it was a wonderful surprise  when I saw this no-knead recipe for biscuits in Heroes’ Feast!

Crunchy on the outside and soft on the inside, these biscuits are so melt-in-your-mouth delicious that you’ll throw away any other recipe you have.  Whether eaten warm, at room temperature, or a day or two later, they are an amazing on-the-go breakfast snack that pairs well with any jam.

To really spice up your morning, try them with a side of Otik’s Skillet-Fried Spiced Potatoes!

See below for my notes on the results and for some helpful tips and tricks when making these yourself! Get Heroes’ Feast here: https://dnd.wizards.com/heroes-feast

Prep Time:  ~20 mins         Cook Time: ~50 mins (30 bake, 20 cool)        Total Time: ~1h 10min

For the ingredients:

12 tbsp. unsalted butter (2 tbsp. at room temp. 10 tbsp. chilled)

3 ½ cups all-purpose flour

1 ½ tsp. baking powder

½ tsp. baking soda

1.25 tsp. kosher salt

1 ½ tsp. sugar

1 2/3 cups buttermilk

I use the following conversion in my cooking:

1 cup all-purpose flour = 125 g

1 tbsp. butter = 14 g

1 tsp. sugar = 4 g

1 tsp. baking powder = 4 g

1 tsp. baking soda = 8 g

1 tsp. kosher salt = 6 g

TIP: If you don’t have unsalted butter, lower the salt content by ~1/3 tsp (2 g).

Above is what the dry ingredients looked like after I broke up the chilled cubed butter into pea-sized pieces.

TIP: Cut your butter into cubes and store it in the fridge until you add it to the dry ingredients. The colder the butter is (without freezing!), the better the pockets of buttery-goodness will turn out.

Above is what the dough looked like after adding the buttermilk. Be aware, it will be a very sticky dough.

Sometimes, you might find that there’s a little bit of flour at the bottom of the bowl that won’t mix in.  This is okay! Just put in in the baking dish with the rest of the dough.

Heroes’ Feast mentions doing this, but I want to reinforce that it is very important to grease the spatula before scoring the biscuit dough. The dough is incredibly sticky and will be a nightmare to deal with if using an ungreased spatula.

I don’t have my 8 x 8 pan with me right now, but I do have a 7 x 11 x 2 glass dish. To account for both the dough being shallower and the baking dish being made of glass, I decreased the cooking time by 6 minutes.

While making these, I found that you don’t need to flour your hands and push the dough to the corners of the pan. If you have a strong enough silicone spatula, you can easily grease it and move the dough around that way. No need to get your hands dirty!

Don’t forget to rotate the baking dish halfway through cooking!

Above is what the biscuits looked like after they came out of the oven and were brushed with butter.

TIP: To remove the biscuits from the baking dish with as little hassle as possible, place a large cutting board over the baking pan and invert it onto the board. The biscuits will slide out easily and you can transfer them to the cooling rack from there.

Overall, I would give these biscuits a 5/5. They’ve quickly become a Sunday morning staple and I always have to stop my family from eating them before they cool-down!

If you’re planning on having them with jam, I’d recommend not adding any more butter. The butter content is so high that they don’t need any more of it.

For best freshness results, store them in a paper bag on your kitchen counter. They will keep for 2-3 days.

this dude makes tiktoks of him reloading household objects like they’re fps weapons and they’re so fucking satisfying

[already so afraid] let me add caffeine to this, actually

the dynamic

Phill: *telling tommy off*

Tommy: *trying to explain himself but is actually digging a deeper hole*

Wilbur: *singing something*

Techno: guys- guys please focus we need to win the game

Become a Coffee Mug.

Happy Holidays, Everyone!

I was looking through my holiday stuff and realized I never shared this picture from last year’s Heroes’ Feast Gingerbread Showcase!

This style of cookie picture, with the dusting of powdered sugar in the background, has always been a personal favourite of mine. I’m so happy that I got to try it out for myself and that it turned out so well!

you need to have 3 drinks with you at all times:

drink one: water. this one's water. can't beat the og

drink two: fun drink. this is a drink with colors or perhaps bubbles in it.

drink three: substance drink. on weekdays this is usually a caffeine drink. for the agonies. on weekends it may be an alcohol drink instead. also for the agonies. sometimes you can combine fun drink and substance drink into one. not always though