I Think A Lot About How We As A Culture Have Turned “forever” Into The Only Acceptable Definition

I think a lot about how we as a culture have turned “forever” into the only acceptable definition of success.

Like… if you open a coffee shop and run it for a while and it makes you happy but then stuff gets too expensive and stressful and you want to do something else so you close it, it’s a “failed” business. If you write a book or two, then decide that you don’t actually want to keep doing that, you’re a “failed” writer. If you marry someone, and that marriage is good for a while, and then stops working and you get divorced, it’s a “failed” marriage.

The only acceptable “win condition” is “you keep doing that thing forever”. A friendship that lasts for a few years but then its time is done and you move on is considered less valuable or not a “real” friendship. A hobby that you do for a while and then are done with is a “phase” - or, alternatively, a “pity” that you don’t do that thing any more. A fandom is “dying” because people have had a lot of fun with it but are now moving on to other things.

I just think that something can be good, and also end, and that thing was still good. And it’s okay to be sad that it ended, too. But the idea that anything that ends is automatically less than this hypothetical eternal state of success… I don’t think that’s doing us any good at all.

More Posts from Ihidemytodgerwell and Others

9 months ago

people have erogenous zones but I have irritable zones. like touch my arm and I'll swat yours away. touch my torso and I'll fucking bite.


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3 years ago

you are what you watch/read: sad and gay

4 years ago

“But dawn—dawn is a gift. Much is revealed about a person by his or her passion, or indifference, to this opening of the door of day.”

— Mary Oliver, from “Wordsworth’s Mountain”, Upstream

4 years ago

maybe i'm into werewolves now😌


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4 years ago
@potter-art

@potter-art


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4 years ago

"..., Or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain. "

~Harvey Dent (The Dark Knight)


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4 years ago

Where is that bloody rooftop... 🙂

I Like Him. That’s My Girl.
I Like Him. That’s My Girl.
I Like Him. That’s My Girl.
I Like Him. That’s My Girl.
I Like Him. That’s My Girl.
I Like Him. That’s My Girl.

I like him. That’s my girl.

1 year ago
This Isn’t Exact Scenes From ‘and We’ll Have A Spring Wedding’ By The Wonderful @blackyote But
This Isn’t Exact Scenes From ‘and We’ll Have A Spring Wedding’ By The Wonderful @blackyote But

This isn’t exact scenes from ‘and we’ll have a spring wedding’ by the wonderful @blackyote but it's certainly inspired by it because i loved it so much

3 years ago

This had to be on my dash nd now urs ʘ‿ʘ

I was just thinking… do the people who recently joined the Sherlock fandom even know about the Norwegian “Oklahomo” parodies?

You’re welcome 😋

4 years ago

Started my day to this... 🥺🙂👍🏻

Scenes without background music: Sherlock and John meet for the first time.

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ihidemytodgerwell - Guide me to a mental asylum.
Guide me to a mental asylum.

Insanity practised here.

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