The Moment Sh Goes From Punishment To Reward, You're Cooked

I just lost the one thing I had

Someone pray for me

switching between needing physical touch and wanting to rip my skin off at the thought of another human being touching me

I'm always fucking up everything, no matter who I talk to and no matter what I do. I'm sick of this.. Can someone please just bash my head already?

SH culture is wanting to rip out your own gvts and bleed out on the sidewalk or just completely mutilate your body beyond repair but also being horribly afraid of death as a concept 👍

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fighting the urge to say thank you for talking to me

i experienced very bad things

I want this to be serious but I'm also like rlly afraid.

Theyre wonderful, they absolutely are, the person I'm afraid of is myself. I'm afraid of fucking up, afraid of not loving enough, so afraid my mind makes up this concept of loving too deeply and being afraid of that because I'm afraid of being hurt or crossing the wrong lines.

I'm ashamed of my own pain

Paranoia is crazy cause when i sh its fine but the second it's someone I care about I have to know every time and everything about it or I'm going to assume you bleeding out on the bathroom floor