Common Frank Bidart Banger (from "In The Ruins," In Half-Light: Collected Poems 1965-2016)

complete shot in the dark here but are any tumblrinas from Dublin? And if so, how the fuck do you people make friends here???

-a culchie who has just moved here

the worst mcelroy? definitely gremnor the vile

tragic. they found an angel stcuk tangled in the telephone wires outsside your house. sorruy. yeah we dont know how to get it out cus anyone who approached the divine light of their holy aura got obliterated. yeah we forgot their names. it'll probably get free sooner or later. dont go outside

"there's something about the dying that feels familiar" fucking unbelievably metal thing to be told. you die and you could swear you've been here before. the last thing you feel before your breath leaves your body is intense deja vu. you've never died before but somehow you know how this goes. you have an uncanny feeling being dead is a temporary gig for you, but you have no idea what gives you that impression. and then you're alive again. and you remember dying. and all you remember is that there was something about it that felt familiar.

This is a comment someone appended to a photo of two men apparently having sex in a very fancy room, but it’s also kind of an amazing two-line poem? “His Wife has filled his house with chintz” is a really elegant and beautiful counterbalancing of h, f, and s sounds, and “chintz” is a perfect word choice here—sonically pleasing and good at evoking nouveau riche tackiness. And then “to keep it real I fuck him on the floor” collapses that whole mood with short percussive sounds—but it’s still a perfect iambic pentameter line, robust and a lovely obscene contrast with the chintz in the first line. Well done, tumblr user jjbang8

cant stop thinking about the fact that mark and gemma met while donating blood.

a painful and uncomfortable task that they both volunteered to do.

the kind of chore u might prefer to avoid if you had a severed version of yourself to do it for you.

so in a world where everyone delegates unpleasant tasks to their innies, you might never meet the love of your life

if you've ever used the London Underground you might have noticed that it often gets uncomfortably hot. the reason for this is actually that its builders dug too greedily & too deep and as a result the trains are very close to the fires of hell. hope that helps.

Elf TV: exclusively 300 season-long soap operas

Dwarf TV: How It's Mined followed by a 4½ hr documentary about salt

Gnome TV: those sensory videos for cats where bugs and mice and birds crawl around on the screen. they really like this

Orc TV: Mythbusters and Top Gear reruns

Halfling TV: the most incredible impassioned storytelling you've ever witnessed always neatly contained in 2 seasons max

Fairy TV: imagine Impractical Jokers except theyre capable of stealing people's faces . this is the only show that fairies have

Chai tea bag + lil but of brown sugar + apple cider packet + 16 oz. mug of hot but not quite boiling water

it will not Fix You but like. maybe. maybe.