I Literally Love When People Realize Positive Reinforcement Works Like Yes Its So Silly Isnt It. But

I guess it wasn't as shitty as I thought. I got a 100% and the teacher emailed my parents to tell them she was impressed...

That wouldn't have happened if I used AI though, would it?

Did I have to rush my essay? Yes. Did I turn it in 10 minutes before midnight when it was due? Yes. Did I proofread it? No. Did I probably fuck it up at least a bit? Yeah. Did I get a good grade? We'll see.

But at least I didn't use AI. I wrote a good, genuine, shitty essay, instead of getting a program to write a shitty essay for me that would probably be easily flagged as AI.

WRITE SHITTY ESSAYS!!! A BAD GRADE FROM TRYING IS BETTER THAN A ZERO FROM GETTING CAUGHT USING AI!!!

I love how my birthday gifts from my boyfriend this year were a copy of Stardew Valley for my switch, and the shiny versions of my two favorite Pokémon for Pokémon Violet.

Their reasoning for Stardew Valley was because we have a multi-player save that we play whenever I go to their house and they wanted me to be able to play Stardew Valley on my switch at home (I have it on my Chromebook at home, but it's hard to play on that)

And I'm really enamored that they took all the time to go shiny hunting for two different Pokémon for me. They were originally planning on just getting me one, but when they asked my favorite Pokémon and I told them I have two favorites, their immediate reaction instead of asking which one I liked more, or getting whichever one was easier to obtain, was to just... spend so much of their time to get both...

I am so in love with this person.

They also spent money to get a reservation for a date at the local cat Cafe for Valentine's day despite all the effort they already spent on my Birthday gifts. (Sadly we had to postpone the date because I'm sick, but we're rescheduling)

I love my boyfriend sososo much

I went on a date today and she found out I made the bike comic

I was out this this cute girl and I think we were really hitting it off, then she asked what kind of comics I make. I told her, and then as she looked at them on her phone, recognition came over her face.

Her: "oh...OH MY GOD... ARE YOU THE BIKE CUCK GUY???"

Me: "Y-yeah..."

Her: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!"

Her: "WAIT, HOLD ON, I GOTTA SHOW MY FRIENDS THIS."

She asked the people at the table behind us if she could borrow one of their phones for a second to pull up something on the browser. Then she held their phone somewhat in front of hers and took a photo of me along with it.

I never asked for the photo so here is my approximate recreation of what I think it looked like:

She was busy texting seemingly all of her friends as we finished our meals and stood up, when I decided to pipe up again.

Me: "Um, y-you know wh-what would make the happiness in the world increase..."

She looked up from her phone with a sly smile.

Her: "What?"

Me: "I-if...if we k-- um, kissed..."

Her amused smile slowly descended into an absolutely indiscernible neutral expression.

then, after a pause

it rose again into a smile

Her: "You... are so cute. Close your eyes. I have a surprise for you."

I closed my eyes tight, and gently puckered my lips, bracing for a kiss.

Then she slapped my ass so hard that there is still a palm print on it.

I don't know yall, but I genuinely wish you the best of luck in your endeavors! We're in this shit together...

Adults are always so concerned about me doing extracurriculars.

But-but you have bad grades because you don't do your homework!

Hate to break it to you, but that homework wouldn't be done even if I didn't have rehearsal

But you keep complaining about being in pain!

Yes, and I handle it. I'd still be in pain anyways.

But you aren't sleeping or eating enough!

True, but I'm working on it. It would be the same if I weren't in theatre

But you obviously shouldn't be doing this thing you like because you're a mess and you have other things that you should do!

Look. If I weren't doing theatre or extra choir stuff, I still would be mostly the same. I wouldn't do my busy work homework that I don't need to do to learn. I would be in pain having to move around and do things and live my life. I would have problems with self care, and mental health, and schoolwork.

But one thing that would be different? I wouldn't be as happy.

Theatre and singing have always been the best things in my life. I've made so many friends and become so much more confident in myself. I feel so amazing getting to do all these things. The only thing taking that away would accomplish is making me miserable.

I wouldn't be focusing more on my schoolwork. I'd be focusing more on the big chunk of my soul that was just ripped out. I wouldn't be magically cured of my physical and mental ailments. I would just have no reason to get out of bed in the morning anymore, or do anything productive or meaningful.

Trying to take away my happiness is not an effective solution. That's how I end up back in and out of the hospital every two months.

Switching between these every day

lock the fuck in?? no way dude. I am TUCKED the fuck in :) good night

I am exhausted. Schoolwork is beating my ass and I can't stand it.