I Thought Of The Most Fucked Up Fanfic

True story

I just want to see an AU where GoD proposes an agreement to KRS where he bring cjs and lsh baco to life BUT he need to be his saint

(idk how this would proced but I think it would be funny)

Cale and Aden first meet:

Cale: it's nice to meet you, Your Highness, the imperial Prince.

Aden: it's my pleasure to meet the hero of Roan Kingdom.

Cale: Please, you Highness, the pleasure is mine and please call me Cale.

Aden: Sure thing, young master silver shield Cale.

Cale: you fucker bitch!

Aden: Did you say something young master Cale?

Cale: No, your Highness, I think you misheard.

Cale: I hope you choke on your wine.

I just want to see cale talking to the Korea.

How would he talk about it? How would he talk about the food? Would he say he misses home? Would he talk about his personal relationships there? About his job? How would he describe the food there? How would he describe the cultural clashes? What kind of thing would he say depending on which member of his family he's talking to? Am I going to write that? Probably not.

Lee Soo hyuk: roksoo, what is that?

Kim rook soo: that's for me splash water on choi jung soo, so he'll shut up😁

Lee Soo hyuk: It would make sense... if he was a cat

Kim rook soo: but works, does not?

Choi Jung soo: I-

*Kim rook soo splash water on choi Jung soo*

Cjs:

Krs: see, it works

Lsh: I'll get one of these for myself

OH OH IMAGINE AN AU WHERE KRS IS CALE'S PAST LIFE

AND THE LAST THING JOUR DOES BEFORE HE DIES IS GIVES ROKSOO'S POWERS AND HIS MEMORIES

This makes so much sense but it's impossible for me to elaborate

Tall Jour

Short Deruth

Tall Violan

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk

Cale are u ok?

I've wanted to do some incorrect quotes with the ancient powers since I rarely see them (+some Cale and Nelan Barrow for funsies)

-

Super rock: Anyone d-

Crazy kid: Depressed?

Glutton: Drained?

Thief: Dumb?

Cheapskate : Disliked?

Super rock: -done with their work... what is wrong with you people ...

-

Thief: Glutton was banned from the chicken shack, so we had to go out of town to get some.

Glutton: Well, they shouldn’t say “all you can eat” if they don’t mean it.

Thief: Glutton , you ate a chair

-

Super rock: You're a loose cannon, Crazy kid.

Crazy kid: No, I'm not. I'm a cannon maybe, but a loose cannon? Is that what you think of me?

Glutton: I think you play by your own rules.

Thief: No way, they think rules were made to be broken.

Super rock: Those are all attributes of a loose cannon.

Crazy kid: No, I'm just a reckless renegade. Cheapskate is a loose cannon.

Cheapskate : *smashes a chair*

-

Super rock: We need to distract these guys

Crazy kid: Leave it to me

Crazy kid: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss.

Glutton, Thief, and Cheapskate : *Immediately begin arguing*

Cale, listening to them in his head: Oh this. I don’t like this. I don't like this at all.

-

Super rock: Favorite horror movie?

Crazy kid : It

Glutton: Saw

Thief: Annabelle

Cheapskate : High School Musical. after watching it I spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and I’d be the only one who didn’t know the lyrics

-

Super rock: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.

Nelan Barrow: What if it bites me and it dies!?

Glutton: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Nelan, learn to listen.

Thief: What if it bites itself and I die?

Cheapskate: That’s voodoo.

Crazy kid: What if it bites me and someone else dies?

Crazy kid: That’s correlation, not causation.

Thief: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?

Cheapskate: That’s kinky.

Super rock: Oh my God.

-

Crazy kid: Jail is no fun. I’ll tell you that much.

Thief: Oh, you’ve been?

Crazy kid: Once. In Monopoly.

-

Cheapskate: .. .----. -- / ... --- .-. .-. -.-- [translation: I’M SORRY]

Super Rock: What's that?

Cheapskate: Remorse code.

Super Rock: I'm even angrier now.

-

Crazy kid: I love you guys, you're the best thing that's happened to me.

Cheapskate : We're the best thing that's ever happened to you?

Crazy kid: Yes!

Glutton: I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.

Oh so this is a top?

The shitiest thing I learned it's the word stepfather LIKE WTF HOW NOBODY REALIZED HOW FUNNY THIS IS

Learning english is a shit but sometimes can né funny too