Tony: *blasts Off Bucky's Robotic Arm, Sending Him To The Ground*

QUESTION SANDER SIDES FANS:

Please help me I don't know what this joke means and I can't find an explanation anywhere:

[You call those witty?]

Patton: Well, you call those glasses?

[I mean yes, I'm not sure if you're implying some—]

Patton: Well, I don't think they'll pick up, they don't have a cell phone! ZING!

Another very good explanation, and you are correct, I love the smell of dove soap

The human memory is so weird.

Example: every single time I smell a bar of dove soap, I think of this one kid I used to go to school with. Now, I can't tell you his age. I can't tell you his favorite color. I can hardly tell you his first name.

But I remember that he always smelled like dove soap.

No matter what. It's like he carried dove soap around in his pockets. Just plain old dove white soap. And it was so strong but not overpowering— like, it wasn't a dove deodorant or something, it was like straight-up smelling a bar of dove soap whenever you were near him.

So now every time I smell dove soap he pops into my mind.

Why?

I can hardly remember my tumblr password sometimes, I forgot my own age a bit ago and had to use a calculator to figure it out. But no matter what, I remember this kid from fifth grade always smelled like dove soap.

Science side of tumblr please explain

This is the first time anyone's tagged Thomas on one of my posts (I think) oh my god this was a barely coherent thought when I was half-asleep—

Janus’s light side name is Janan

Janus's light side name is Janan

I should add, these are all human AUs, so they are all human and completely mortal in these

Objectively, the dumbest things the sides have done in my fics (not taking into account why they did them) (TW)

Roman: Threw himself down a staircase

Orange: Kissed Logan years after they broke apart their mutually toxic relationship

Janus: Fell off a cliff (and just barely caught himself)

Remus: Made a painting with his own blood

Patton: Agreed to go on a long hike with his friends when he's never been able to before (and was out of breath by the top of the first hill and had to be carried by Remus)

Logan: Realized wayyy too late that Remus (his best friend and previous roommate) and Roman (his friend and current roommate) were brothers

Virgil: Met Roman and in less than a minute, in his second sentence spoken to him, called him out for self-harming

And now, a new one

Heart broke: Good Omens isn't a romance because while Crowley has been in love with Aziraphale for 6000 years, Aziraphale is either too oblivious or scared to see what's right in front of him and pushes Crowley away

Broke: Good Omens isn't a gay love story because Crowley and Aziraphale aren't in love

Woke: Good Omens is a gay love story because Crowley and Aziraphale are in love

Bespoke: Whether Good Omens is a gay love story or not is debatable; it is, however, undeniably a story of the love between Crowley and Aziraphale (whatever type of love that may be)

Neil Gaiman: Good Omens isn't a gay love story because while Crowley and Aziraphale are in love, they are not human males, they are an angel and a demon

You've heard of Spiderman: Homecoming, Spiderman: Far From Home, and Spiderman: No Way Home, but may I introduce you to:

Spiderman: Please Just Let Me Go Home

A movie in which Peter Parker keeps finding himself with task after task after chore after chore after errand after errand to do while he keeps trying to escape and go home so he can watch tv in his pajamas

Reasons I'd Make A Great Drag Queen, Hypothetically:

- Already very used to wearing "women's" clothes

- Already experienced with makeup

- No need for fake breasts

- I hardly have any eyebrows to cover

- "Women's" clothes/dresses fit my body shape very well

- I'm already familiar with "women's" clothes sizings

- Short hair so I can easily wear a wig

- Pierced ears so I could wear earrings

- Very experienced in heels

- Naturally long and thick eyelashes

- Queer

Patton, poking his head into the dark side lounge: Hey, it's time for d—

Remus: *knees pulled into his chest, having a crisis, mumbling about reindeer*

Logan: *beating Janus over the head and shoulders with a pillow, yelling at him*

Janus: *trying to duck Logan and laughing, saying something about not regretting anything*

Virgil: *sitting in an armchair, on his phone*

Virgil, looking up: Hey, Padre. Dinner?

Patton: *nods*

Patton: Is this... Are they okay?

Virgil: Oh, this is just a Wednesday. 's why I'm always with you and Roman.

Patton: Please... Feel free to come to our side anytime.

Remus, proud of knowing something: Logan. I have a fact.

Logan, not looking up from his book: Proceed.

Remus: Male reindeers lose their antlers in the winter, while female reindeers don't. All of Santa's reindeers have antlers, meaning they're all female, but the media says they're men because they don't want a team of strong females depicted.

Logan: Or they aren't cis. Ever think about that?

Remus: Wait wha—

Logan: Maybe they're transgender. Don't be a bigot, Remus.

Remus: I'M NOT—

Remus: Wait—

Remus: Am I being a bigot???

Logan: I don't know, are you? You're assuming their gender aligns with their sex.

Remus: *now having a crisis*

Janus, walking past, unable to help it: So you could say they're... Transgendeer.

Logan, hopping up, beating Janus with a pillow: I'm trying to escape Patton's constant puns, goddamnit!

Unstoppable force (Patton's love and affection and want to know more about him) vs immovable object (Virgil not wanting to open up to anyone about his past with the dark sides)