Aventurine Is Attracted To Men. Women Who Delude Themselves Into Thinking He Liked Them Makes Me Laugh

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⎯⎯ MY DEAREST, STARLIGHT ❞

DESC. reincarnated back into the same world you once stepped foot on as your past life. now, you were given another chance to live again, however your starry eyes laid on the eyes of a black star, wanting to avenge his mother. will you help him?

PAIRINGS. aquamarine hoshino x f!reader

LYRICS. "I'm so thankful for all of the girls you loved before. but I love you more!"

WARNINGS. may contain dark themes like murder, death and other kinds. this does in fact have supernatural due to the reincarnation thing. fluff, angst and more! will edit once i get every warnings needed.

STATUS. ongoing!

BUTTERFLY'S NOTE. i may have or not fucked up some things when trying to make the gradient texts LMAOAOAOAO SO DON'T MIND THAT !! a few characters may be very ooc </3 This story is NON-CANON.

PROLOGUE — Traveling Star

CHAPTER 1 — Starry Eyes

[tw: noncon!]

gn reader!!!

rui kamishiro FUCKS!!!!!!!! he loves to hold u down by ur shoulders and press all of his weight in you so u have no choice but 2 take his huge dick! he thinks u look so so so so cute crying and begging for him 2 stop! he never will, tho<33333 u just look so cute n miserable like this :(((......

u can keep trying to push him off, but he'll get more and more aggressive the more u try! he'd push u down harshly and sink his teeth into u, so deep he draws blood<33 he'd ask so gently; "does it hurt baby? does it make you want to cry?" and u better give him the satisfaction of seeing ur tears fall down ur cheeks!!!!! otherwise he'll try even HARDER to see u sob and shake<33333!!!!!!!!!!!

𝒎𝒚 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒘𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒚𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆.

pairing. dan heng x gn!reader cw. hurt/no comfort, implied relationship between reader and dan heng, falling out of love (or is it), heavy angst that is carlyle's brand™ author's note. i say i love dan heng then subject him to my heaviest angst ideas. teehee, whoops. is anyone still surprised that i wrote yet another fic to a taylor swift song? listen to you're losing me for maximum enjoyment. ❤️‍🩹

dan heng would have to be the luckiest man alive to have known someone like you and simultaneously, the most foolish man alive to let you slip through his fingers.

dan heng did not know where to begin when it came to describing you. to merely think he was lucky enough to call someone like you his was an understatement; you were perfect for him in every way possible, that it baffles him just how he's with you.

the way your eyes sparkled at the mention of stars, your favorite subject, before dan heng listened for the millionth time to your lighthearted ramble of where the stars came from. the way your laugh echoed melodiously in his head when he made a small but harmless mistake, how he would frown a little in shame but your toothy grin would make him forget his initial embarrassment. the way your head rested on his chest, humming to a childhood lullaby that would always have the same effect on his heart — to grow bigger in affection and adoration for you.

and you made him a better person, better than he ever thought he could be. dan heng had always carried the burden of his past reincarnation's sins on his back, but your presence always made the weight seem lighter. a glimpse of you was a glimpse of a life that he could live without guilt. and he wanted to make sure that he was worthy of it. worthy of you.

in short, dan heng found the perfect lifelong partner in you, end of story.

which ... just made your words pierce deeper than a knife to his heart.

"i think we should stop."

dan heng was too deep in his thoughts that he had not realized that he crumpled the paper flower bouquet in his hand. he was supposed to hand this to you the moment he stepped inside your room; march had teased him on the amount of dedication he put in perfecting his craft — according to the archives he has read, they called it the art of origami — but dan heng found himself smiling the entire process. secretly, he thought of it like his practice of building a life with you; handling the paper with subtle gentleness and care, folding it neatly to avoid any creases, before constructing a foundation for the camellia flower, your favorite flower.

what a joke this all seems to be now.

what was going on? where did he do wrong? why were you doing this? dan heng tried to remember if he had forgotten anything important. was it the time that he brushed you aside because he was engrossed in the mission? was it because dan heng constantly locked himself in the archives all by himself, that you grew tired of that?

".... stop what?"

you looked up at him, your stormy eyes brimming with tears that you were still trying to hold back. even when you were crying and breaking his heart, dan heng could not help but think how captivating you still looked. "you know what i mean."

why? "why?"

from his perspective, he could already see how much you were struggling to say it. you were shaking your head as your body was trying to hold in the biggest sob. it took everything in dan heng not to run to you and hold you in his arms, but what are the chances that you'd end up pushing him away? your words were evidence enough that you did not need his grasp right now.

"i just... i just don't see a future with you in it."

well, that hurt. that hurt more than the days that his other self wasted away in the shackling prison, mind swimming in terror and confusion as to why he was restrained the moment he was born. that hurt more than the time he sustained his deepest injury, because you were the one who ended up patching it up for him, all the while chastising him for being too reckless again. he won't have that anymore.

"why?" it was a repeat of his former question, but dan heng could hear his voice breaking as he repeated himself. moments ago, he was just dreaming about spending the rest of his life with you. to be able to wake up with you next to him and be the first to see the satisfied smile on your face. to stay by your side until the day you inevitably passed on before him.

and now, you were asking him to let that all go?

despite his initial reflections, dan heng took a step towards you, to which he was greeted with you stepping backwards, a sight that sank his heart even deeper. "but i love you." dan heng started, his heart soaring when he saw that his words still elicited a reaction from you. at this point, he was just grasping at non-existent straws that would bring you back to your senses. back to him. "we can figure a way—"

"dan heng." he stopped at his name, before slowly looking up to meet your gaze. your eyes were clouded with pain, sorrow, but most importantly, it was devoid of the warmth that dan heng sought solace in.

"i... i don't know if i can do this anymore."

you were no longer facing him, your back shaking in muffled sobs as dan heng stood there, as he watched you push him away for the first and last time. the feeling of the crumpled paper flower on his palm left nothing but a sour taste in his mouth. to think that he was so excited to see you.

"you're giving up then? on us?"

his voice came out hollow, his once forlorn expression twisting in incredulity and subtle frustration. to think that he was so excited to make things finally official between the both of you. he was finally ready to settle down and become the better man— no, the best man for you. could you not see how hard he worked to deserve you?

how cruel were you, really?

you didn't turn around to face him, but your silence told him everything he needed to know. it took everything in him to stifle the urge to let out a bitter laugh. how could he be so foolish? who would love someone as stoic, risk-taking and tactless as him, anyways?

"i didn't take you for a quitter, y/n. but i guess we're learning something new about each other right now." he spat out, which earned a turn from you. dan heng could see the hurt in your eyes. it annoyed him that even when you're hurting him, it still pained him to see you in distress. it took everything in him to reel back and stop himself. "so this is it; this is how all... this ends." he refused to let this flurry of emotions overwhelm him, as dan heng took one step closer towards you, and to his surprise, you stood, feet firmly planted on the ground. well, what does that matter now.

he was now towering over you, his eyes never leaving your figure and now was looking down at you. a part of him begged him to not say anything else, to leave with his dignity and his head up high. even if they weren't ... partners anymore, he could still try salvaging a friendship. and yet, his emotions took full control of himself at that moment. "i can't believe i even thought you were the one for me, but i guess i would probably outlive you, anyways. "

he could have sworn he heard your breath hitch as your eyes betrayed everything you were feeling at the time. a mix of grief, sadness and surprise at his words, no doubt. however, it was a fleeting sight that only slipped into another unreadable expression. "leave. please... just leave."

typically, dan heng would be able to tolerate the silence between the both of you, but that was because he could lose himself in your gaze. not now, though. his hand crumpled the paper flower even further before he threw it at the ground. dan heng took one last look at you, a small hope resurfacing that you would take everything back, that you were simply saying it in jest — but there was nothing.

he allowed his anger to overtake him and close the door behind him with a loud slam, huffing in mixed grief and anger and leaving your room for the last time. even when you were no longer looking, dan heng still refused to let that flurry of emotions overwhelm him. he shouldn't cry over someone who gave up on him as easily as that.

if he had lingered for a moment longer, he would have probably heard you breaking down in the loudest sobs on the other side of the door.

━━━━━━━ ˖°˖ ☾☆☽ ˖°˖ ━━━━━━━

it had been three months since you left the astral express. three months since dan heng closed the door to the possibility that he would spend the rest of his long, long life with you.

three months since he hurled all those hurtful words towards you, which he has regretted since then. but his stupid ego would not let him utter a single apology to you the following morning.

it didn't take long for you to pack your bags and leave, which dan heng actually found relieving. the more he didn't see you and mourn over what could have been, the better.

still, it had been three months. dan heng would be a liar if he said that you did not cross his mind once. well, maybe more than once. maybe a million times since you left. he hated how you still had a hold on him, hated how your voice would be the last thing he's reminded of before he drifts to sleep, but most of all, he hated how he missed you since that fateful night.

how could he have missed the signs?

the tug on his sleeve brought him back to reality, as march looked over at him with a concerned glance. dan heng just shook his head and looked down at the very thing he was holding.

a bouquet of camellias. real ones, this time.

"dan heng, if you're feeling overwhelmed, we can just—" he was already walking ahead of march without listening to what else she had to say. truthfully, nothing she would probably say would deter him. the cold weather of jarilo vi was enough to drone out his ever active mind. so this was the planet that you called home after you left the express.

it did not take long for him to reach his destination, especially with how fast he had been walking. dan heng could barely even see the identifiable pink hair belonging to march behind him anymore. he'd probably have to offer her an apology for leaving her behind later.

it was a desolate deserted place, save for the monsters that roamed nearby and the dilapidated house that dan heng could only surmise as your house. though, he knew already what he was looking for.

"hey, y/n. i know you probably don't want to see me again, but ... here are your favorite flowers, just how you liked them."

to find himself face to face to a makeshift tombstone wasn't a sight that dan heng could have ever prepared himself for, but the fact that it was your tombstone that he was leaving flowers for made his last words towards you sink a knife deeper in his heart.

how could he not have noticed your erratic heartbeat?

when you told him that you couldn’t see a future with him in it, he didn’t think that you meant you did not have a future.

all those months, dan heng refused to let the flurry of emotions overwhelm him, but maybe for this time, he could just blame the emotional downpour on the bleak cold weather.

"if you had told me you were dying, i would have stayed."

written by carlyle (@particular-one) copyright: all content belongs to particular-one on tumblr (2023)

Vigil ✤ Kazuha

V i g i l

A/N: Here is the Kazuha angst, sweeties :')) I wrote this with my prepared angsty playlist hehe- I.. well, my heart cracked..

✤ She/her

Words: 3.9k

"Text in this format means dialogue in flashback!"

≿————- ❈ ————-≾

The memory of peering into the crib with excited blabbers remains fresh, untarnished with the passing of time.

It feels like it’s just yesterday when your mother reached for the wailing baby laying inside to hand him in your caring touch.

“This is your little brother, [Name].” you squealed when the boy clung unto your finger, “His name is Kazuha. Be a good sister for him, understand?”

“Yes!”

Ah, that did feel as if it was just yesterday.

“Nee-chan!”

Dropping the basket of laundry, you frantically looked around.

“Nee-chan!”

“Kazuha-!?”

He was sprinting, arms flailing as tears spilled past his eyes and panicked exclaims left his lips. His friend was chasing him from behind, laughing as he waved an undercooked fish—your brother’s worst nightmare.

Comedic but understandable.

“Tomo’s making me eat it!” your younger brother mumbled behind you, pointing accusingly towards his friend who sheepishly spluttered excuses at your stern gaze.

Taking the skewered fish in Tomo’s hands, you hummed, patting his and Kazuha’s heads.

“How about I cook something for the both of you, instead? How’s that sound?”

“Yes, please! Nee-chan’s cooking is the best!”

You can never get tired of cooking for the two of them, even if your sibling eventually asked to be taught, you find yourself still taking over cooking duty. Lovingly whipping up dishes is your forte.

It stuck around when the household eventually lost the attending servants following the fall of the Kaedehara clan. It even stuck through the grim times of your parents’ passing.

Kazuha had went through so much at a young age, changed little by little—and you aren’t oblivious to it. With his growth, you are a witness to his budding shell of maturity.

Single years fold into a decade and all of a sudden, the mirthful silverette who doesn’t last a day without calling you ‘big sister’ has grown up.

Far too quickly, to be honest, but who are you to hold him back?

“You don’t call me ‘nee-san’ nowadays,” you laugh jokingly, “My, you’ve grown so much, Kazu!”

He stares at the plates of food you set on the dining table, his sigh small and feeble as you continue gushing. Albeit he has a smile on his face, it appears tight. Forced.

But you turn a blind eye to that—you’ve always been doing it.

Now, however, it seems that your brother has grown tired of humoring you. It has been going on for too long.

“I’m not some child anymore..” his monotonous voice is so unlike him—it’s as if he no longer is the person you grew up with.

Having him address it bluntly prompts you to pause, the only sound being the sizzling of unagi meat, frying to perfection. The richness of its color, however, dulls when you process what your sibling has mentioned.

As if its vividness is an illusion meant to shield you from present-day reality.

Still, you shake it away, keeping the smile on your face as you set the fried meat on a new plate, turning to put it down on the table beside the other dishes.

“Oh, Ka-“ you stop, seeing the look in his eyes.

The way his carmine optics bore against your [c]s is foreign.

It’s scary.

It’s different. It’s new.

You sit down in front of him, trying not to show how restless you’ve become. Such an attempt is futile, of course, since you’re in front of the person you’ve been with for years.

“Kazu-“

Thud!

Silence zips your lips when he lays his chopsticks down. It isn’t by any means a slam—but someone like Kazuha doesn’t need to be outright with anything in order to express a negative opinion.

“So please refrain from initiating unnecessary coddling,” he cuts you off with a swivel as he leaves for the door. “I have grown up now, sister. I... need you less.”

What?

A multitude of emotions hit you at once, all coming from his sudden statement that feels like it can tear you apart. But oh—who were you kidding?

You know that this will eventually come.

The very day where he admits that he is capable of being alone. Without you.

The opening of the door causes you to stand from your chair, “Wait!”

He does as you said but doesn’t look back. His hand remains on the handle of the knob, unchanging of his decision to leave.

You tug the black and red scarf from your neck, inching close to the man so you can wrap it around his neck. “It’s cold outside.. won’t you at least eat something?”

It takes him a moment to respond—but his decision does not change.

He detangles the fabric on his neck and, without looking you in the eye, sets it in your hand, rejecting your offer.

“Later.”

And he’s gone.

≿————- ❈ ————-≾

Nothing changed much after he left with that declaration.

Often times he still returns in the dead of night, a smile on his face. It will only ever droop when you come in the room greeting him a lovely evening, and he will sigh.

“I told you not to wait up for me.”

He will depart for his room before he can hear your explanation.

It leaves you hanging, hollow with bitter hope and refusal to believe that you both have reached that time in life where he doesn’t need you as much.

Each time he turns his back, you are filled to the brim with sorrow you didn’t know you’re capable of holding.

Retreating to the upper floor of your home, you will stay at the balcony sighing your concerns away to the stars. To the place where you believe your parents are staying, listening to your bouts of frustration and worry.

“Was I a good sibling for him, mother? Father?” you’ll sometimes mutter as you play with your silver locks, the only thing you share with your sibling other than the forgotten name of a once esteemed clan.

And as you vent all these to the stars, you remain oblivious to the lone figure hiding by the shadows in the adjacent room. His frown is tiny. Sad, but not guilty.

Kazuha will leave once again before he’ll hear his sister’s frustrated cries.

Sometimes, he will chew over it when he is wandering Inazuma—thinking, pondering if perhaps there could’ve been a way to say it without hurting his sibling. But as he contemplates over and over, he finds that there is no easy method to admitting the truth.

His friend Tomo, albeit not being told anything, is naturally cognizant of the things revolving around the silver-haired siblings. The older sister’s presence has been diminishing and he can count her appearances at Kazuha’s side getting less.

He has implied several times to make up with the female even if they had no outright argument, and when faced with a baffled question of ‘why’, Tomo only smiles.

“Because you’re family.”

So simple and yet—when Kazuha thinks of the matter a minute longer, the taste in his tongue becomes acrid.

“What upsets you?” his friend questions as he coos over his white feline, “You’re not the Kazuha who’s always crying for big sister, heh.”

The silverette cannot even find it within him to send a retort. His silence, to others, is a message that typifies a want to be alone—but to Tomo, who has known him since they’re both children, that silence is different.

With a hum, he stretches his limbs, yawning as his cat rolls around the grass.

“You know, [Name] won’t hate you for wanting it,” he starts, “You want to wander, don’t you? But you feel like you’re tied down. You’re grounded—because [Name] is here.”

Kazuha flinches and his friend snickers.

Spot on.

“I’m just going to repeat what I said because I meant it, Kazuha. Tell her the truth. She’s literally the most understanding person I know—it’s not like she’s going to despise you for wanting something.”

“… I’ll think about it.”

Tomo sighs. It’s not what I was hoping for but it’s a start.

Remembering something that moment, Tomo lets out a loud scream that nearly sent his friend toppling in the nearby stream of water. Kazuha looks on with slightly wide eyes as the other man jumps to his feet, violet eyes gleaming.

“Oh, right! I plan to initiate another challenge!”

Another challenge…

Kazuha closes his eyes with a hum, “I do hope you’ll last another. You’ve been faced with the worst of the worst.”

The chuckles that leave his friend’s lips are excited and sort of expectant.

“It’s going to be the ultimate one of all! So if you’ll excuse me~”

≿————- ❈ ————-≾

Perhaps a talk with your brother will do you both good.

You’ve both been acting like strangers walking on eggshells underneath the same house and it is driving you insane. He’s not even looking you in the eye anymore!

Given his quiet personality, confrontation will be difficult, but he’s a cooperative person. Besides, he always hears you out.

There isn’t any reason for him not to when he knows that this will be done only for the betterment of the future.

So, with a nervous disposition but eager heart to settle things right, you lift the basket from its place with plans to head over to the market. It’s an hour or two before dusk, just the perfect time to shop for dinner.

“Mm.. some dry-braised salted fish for tonight sounds lovely.” You muse, remembering how the dish is your brother’s favorite.

Ah, the number of tries he takes to perfect and stylish it into his own can’t be forgotten.

It doesn’t take too long to cook it, but you’ll be making tons of other side dishes and dessert, so it’s best to start early!

You exit the abode, the smile on your face present as ever even when you’re greeted outside by a couple of Shogunate Soldiers. Their features appear sterner, their hold on their naginata rock solid.

“Are you Kaedehara [Name]?”

Hm?

“Yes. Can I help you?”

The soldiers lunge forward, spears falling to a position pointing at you from all possible angles, cutting any means of escape as you furrow your brows. “What’s the meaning of this?”

“Your brother has defied the Decree of the Shogun and was hereby declared a criminal. Going against an Imperial Decree results in punishment inclusive to his immediate family.”

Your basket falls to the ground.

Thud!

Kazuha’s feet create a loud sound following his landing, a breath of panic expelling past as he rushes away.

The warmth in his hand escalates to a scalding degree, burning and searing like the fading power of Electro held within the golden casing.

To think that that was what Tomo meant.. !

He does not feel anger, no, just the burn of desperation and want to hide his friend’s Vision because he doesn’t want it to be taken away—to be placed in that statue that displays the lost ambitions of many others.

He’ll be damned before the Shogunate can take it… !

The criminal evades those at his tail, making swift maneuvers on rooftops and alleys without a second thought. His limbs are answering his every command, be it to duck, to jump—or to even draw his blade.

He is still ways away from the port but getting there won’t prove to be too complex for someone like him. He’s cut down plenty of the samurai in his escape from Tenshukaku,

Tomo…

“You’re family. Tell her.”

Family—

“This is the first one in a long time I’ve heard of it being extended-! To whom again? The clan that has lost its prestige a decade ago, right?” he almost trips in his sprinting, darting to an alleyway so he can further eavesdrop.

Did I hear that correctly?

A relieved sigh escapes when those chasing him run past his hiding spot.

Sucking in his breath, the silverette tightens his grip on the faded Vision of his best friend as he listens in the hushed conversation.

“Be quiet!” someone hisses, “If someone overhears us, what next? Still, I do feel bad.. they lost so much already. I can’t believe they’d drag an innocent person into it, too..”

“Well, there’s nothing we can do. The Shogun issued the penalty to immediate families, right? As far as I know, there are only two Kaedeharas left—”

Kazuha feels his heart stopping. Kaede..hara?

There’s no mistaking it.

But why—?

Why would a punishment meant for him extend to her?

She’s innocent!

Going off-course, he sprints in the direction of his house. The house that he lives in with his sister who takes great care of him—the same sister he’s willing to leave in favor of chasing what he wants in life.

He’s willing to, but he doesn’t.

Because perhaps—perhaps if he stayed and buried his desire, then he will amount to the same greatness she has done for him. But he cannot stand it, either. As patient as he is, as kind and ‘gentle’, [Name] can always see through his face.

He’s always been antsy—always itching to wander and he’s stumped that his sister is well-aware of that fact. Still, she’s always playing the ignorant one, pretending not to care- still coddling him as if he’s little and he’s had… enough of it.

But now that the situation has pinned this misfortune upon them, the ronin realizes that she’s only pretending for his sake, as well.

“Cut that out, I don’t need it. I fear that.. you will only embarrass yourself.”

Wasn’t it him who refused to tell her of his want to roam free in the first place?

“I understand that I am your brother—but there is no need to worry over me all the time. I can look after myself, [Name]. Do worry about something else, instead.”

Wasn’t it him who stuck around, still?

The bitterness in his tongue increases with each leap of his feet. He doesn’t even process the race of his heart as he’s carried through the same path that leads him home. To his family—to his only sister.

Everything seems to pass by slowly, in a blur, like the specks that decorate his vision the more his mind throws stacks and stacks of memories. This is madness.

Complete and utter madness.

He rounds the corner to see the figure of his only sibling, her back turned to him—she cannot see him, but he can see the armed soldiers flanking around her.

His throat tightens and certainly, he wouldn’t have been able to utter a word due to how it feels like his throat has been crushed.

“[Name]!”

Yet, the furious scream that tears past his lips denies all kinds of ‘impossibility’ the instant he sees the female falling to the ground, the sight of red splatter making him draw his blade.

Whoosh!

The summoned wind is opposingly gentle to the brewing storm in someone’s beautiful carmine eyes.

“[Name]-.. !”

That voice.. Kazuha?

Sometimes, the depth of emotion in Kazuha’s eyes is too deep for you to understand. Despite being so silent, he’s so, so expressive with his stares.

That even when he isn’t trembling when he lifts your torso, you know how much he’s quaking from within.

“What are you.. doing here? You have to go,” you cough red when he adjusts you in his arms, the sight of the fallen soldiers reminding you of the situation at hand. “Quick—before they.. catch you.”

He shakes his head,

“I’m taking you with me, I have a boat prepared, come, let’s—”

“Don’t lie to me, Kazuha.”

He pauses, flitting his gaze down to meet yours. You hate how you can’t seem to focus on him, though. Your sight is blurring in and out, only providing small intervals of clarity where you can see the panic in his features.

A sight you didn’t think you’d see on him until now.

“I know you made it for yourself. You’ve been planning to leave home, weren’t you? I’m not..” you’re not oblivious to his wish, “I’m not mad. I was only holding you back, wasn’t I?”

He sucks in a breath.

“I-I-“

What was he supposed to say?

Weakly tapping his arm, you start taking quick breaths—just to take in all the air you can while tolerating the gaping wound from being impaled.

It hurts. You want to scream. It hurts.

But you don’t—because you do not want to appear weak to your brother.

You promised mother and father that you will not cry when faced with problems—he mustn’t see, Kazuha mustn’t see. But at this moment, you just want to break apart. Disbelief is kicking in, you can’t believe this is happening.

When—where did everything go wrong?

“Besides, I’m not of use to you anymore. As if I’ll last the journey to Liyue-“

“Don’t say that!”

You blink owlishly, gasping out in pain when his hand presses against your wound, futilely attempting to hold back the bleeding.

“K-Kazuha?”

Your own hand shakily plants itself atop his own, helping him press—as if his hand isn’t heavy enough to stop the flow—it down. It will hurt, but you can’t say for sure. You’ve already grown numb and your head is swimming.

Still, you focus on him.

Still, you help him apply pressure even if you know—even if he knows—that it’s too late.

“Don’t say that. You’ve..” his voice cracks, “You’ve done so much, [Name], you-“

You took over the clan household when our parents died. You struggled to make ends meet for both of us. And yet.. all I do.. all I do is… !

Kazuha angrily bites on his lip, his hold on his composure beginning to slip as his mind throws in a reel of olden days.

“I’m leaving, [Name]. Please don’t wait up, I may take longer.”

“I’m grateful, but I don’t need that anymore.”

“Stop that, already.”

He dips his head with a muffled cry. All I do is wander and desire for a future where I can roam freely. I haven’t even thought of you..!

“You’ve grown, Kazuha,” he snaps back into this harsh reality when he feels the hand atop his disappear, presently moving to brush his messy locks.

He doesn’t know why all of a sudden his sight is becoming misty, but perhaps—perhaps it is because he remembers when his sister used to brush his hair the same way with a loving smile.

It is the same touch he flees from nowadays.

The same touch now—the same loving smile.

“As much as I hate to admit it, you’re right—you’ve grown so much.. and I’m still clinging onto the past.”

So lively, so beautiful and yet—

“You’re strong now..”

Yet it’s dying.

He presses harder on his sibling’s wound, almost sadistically—as if he’s hoping that it’ll ignite a painful reaction. “[Name], please, let me-“

Because if it hurt—then it means she’s still okay. She’s still responding.

“So capable.. so independent, you are.”

So why—? He almost chokes out a sob. Why are you not reacting to it!?

“Mother and father would be so proud of you. I am sorry if I was lacking in any way.”

“Please, [Name], you can’t do this.” He trembles, the composure he created so, so close to breaking as he gives up on endeavors that are pointless, to begin with. Instead, he tilts his head up, wishing to curse the heavens above.

For everything.

“I’m happy to be your sister, and.. I’m proud of you… Kazu..”

“Wait-“ he stumbles over his words, catching the falling hand of his sibling and registering how deathly pale she has gotten in a matter of seconds. “Wait, please—I-“

As much as he wants to voice out he’s sorry. For many things; for turning his back on her, for being distant when all they have is each other, he’s unable to find his voice when he sees the tears dripping out of his sister’s [c] eyes.

His strong older sister—weeping. It’s the first time he has seen her cry.

Her smile trembles—

“I love you. My nice.. little.. brother.”

—And her [c]s are then hidden forever.

The way she endearingly called him in her dying breath has him freezing, his heart pausing as if he had died along with her. But then the spark of pain welcomes him back to reality—to life.

And then he is leaning over her.

“[Name]..” breathless whispers escalate into panicked murmurs. “[Name]?”

His heart is pounding in his chest as he tries to shake her awake, like when he’d do when he’s eight and awake from an awful dream.

“Nee-san.. can I sleep by your side tonight?”

And although her [c] eyes are tired, she will still smile. “Okay.”

And she’d keep watch over him the whole night.

He’s reminded of it when he hopelessly shakes her awake, to no obvious avail. But he keeps grasping her arms, anyway, like he used to many years ago.

But things are different now.

“[Name]—[N-Name]!?”

He said it himself—he’s no longer a child.

“Please, don’t leave me- I- you’re all I have left!” The ronin’s composure finally breaks loose and his tears begin landing like a profuse waterfall. His uncontained sobs remain unheard.

This time, there is no one to wake him up from his nightmares.

“No—no, no- no, please..!” Kazuha weeps as he holds his sister’s cold hand, shakily pressing it to his forehead, imitating the sweet action she has always given him. A hand on his head, on his shoulder—or on his cheek if he’s tearful. “You can’t!”

She’ll tell him not to be sad because it’ll make her sad, too.

And he’ll hurriedly wipe his tears because ‘no! big sister mustn’t feel sad because of me!’.

Then [Name] will muster a smile as bright as the sun and hold his face in her warm hands, and press a kiss on his forehead. He’ll get red and thrash around, whining, ‘onee-san!’. And about how embarrassing it is so she mustn’t do it anymore.

Now, he is holding her hand in his own, trying to remember the same warmth it emitted just a day ago. Just a few hours ago. How long has it been?

And when he doesn’t feel the warmth—when he doesn’t remember the warmth, when all he feels is the cold and the obvious lack of love, Kazuha breaks apart.

His heart squeezes and his tears spill more, his lips parting to release the honorific he has dropped a long, long time ago. “Nee-san!”

“You don’t call me ‘nee-san’ nowadays,”

“Onee-san!”

“My, you’ve grown so much, Kazu!”

“Onee-san!”

I’m calling you. He cries, like a picture of misery. So why aren’t you waking up? Sister! He cries, like a heartbroken child.

The winds around him pick up, warning him of incoming men sent to apprehend and penalize him the same way they did to his sibling. It’s suffocating—maddening, even, and he wants to tear them all down himself.

But [Name] wouldn’t like that.

So, with a muted cry and bolster of willpower, he tears himself from the body of his kin, trembling.

He can hear the thundering steps of the samurai as he hurries to untangle the same black and red scarf [Name] has once attempted to give him. The same fabric he has rejected.

“I’m sorry.. I’m so sorry.” he hugs her with all his might, with his soul, and with his heart before he’s back up on his feet and running. I love you, too, nee-san.

“Get him!” someone roars from behind.

And although he wishes to turn and slice them away, he couldn’t—because he’d be seeing the fallen figure of the same person he had neglected to cherish. So, instead, he nestles the scarf around his neck whilst clutching onto the Vision of his friend.

Down the path, he runs.

Years ago, he will be accompanied by the people he loves, chasing a faraway future.

Now he is running on the same path alone, running after a dream that can now be turned into reality.

Far from Inazuma.

Far from home.

≿————-　❈　————-≾

a/n: did it hurt-

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　Return to the Scrying Glass　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

≿————-　taglist　————-≾

@lehra @melkxsh

Helping Albedo out with his research by day and at night he researches you under the covers. 😏 he uses that time to try different positions and different ways to drive you wild. He doesn’t understand why the pain of your nails scratching down his back is so pleasurable, he wants more. Albedo and his favorite assistant make many frequent trips up the mountain for this ‘research’

ya’ll horn knee for the alkemist

...

Well here’s more food

We know that albedo is mostly outside gathering some herbs or something for his alchemy or probably near somewhere to continue with his research.

So as his assistant, it’s a responsibility you always follow wherever he goes and assist him with anything. And what did you assist him with?

Of course, it’s sex. After he did that intimate act with you, he wants to “expand” his knowledge and further gather more reactions from you.

Oh how red your face was when he calmly calls your name and tells you to lift up your skirt. It was just a simple touching here and there. A finger tracing your panties, his hand slowly trailing to your shirt as he pushes you against the tree until your back is resting on it.

He hums and looks down to see your blouse unbuttoned that your bra was practically exposed to him. The pen between his fingers was nudged to the center of your chest and he used it as leverage to lift up your undergarments without laying a finger on you.

You shuddered at the cold air brushing your skin. Your nipples are turning hard both from the wind and at his focused stare. You bit your lower lip and looked elsewhere other than him, your fingers digging on the rough trunk of the tree to make yourself smaller from his lean body.

“What are you feeling right now, [Name]?” He calmly asked, bringing the pen to your nipples and toys with them. How in the world does he still remain calm from this?! Does he not get worried or anxious if someone happens to see you both here half-naked in the middle of the forest?!

“Cold, sir...” And yet you still answered him and helped him with this so-called research.

“Not hot and bothered at all?” He inquired once again and this time bringing the pen lower, trailing to your abdomen until to your clothed core, brushing the tip onto it that had your nerves shivering in delight.

“A... a bit...” you stammered and lifted your hand up to your lips to quiet your noises. Albedo’s face scrunched up when he saw you covering your face. He brought his gloved hands on top of yours and brought it down to your side.

“I never said to put your hand there, did I?” His voice was sharp and a bit darker than the calming and velvety voice you’ve grown to love. You shook your head and apologized to him sheepishly.

The alchemist sighed and put the pen back in his pocket before resting his hand on your bare shoulder.

“Turn around.” He ordered.

There’s no way you can’t go against him. He’s your supervisor and it’s unlikely of you, his trusted assistant, to disobey him. It only brought you excitement and made you even wetter than before at his demanding tone.

You’ve never seen him like this at all even in your previous sex with him. You mustered all the courage you have left in you to nod at him, desperately holding yourself back from grinding against him as he presses himself onto you.

—

“I think Mister Albedo should be here...” The female alchemist muttered to herself whilst looking at the piece of paper left by the Kreideprinz in the Favonius Headquarters.

The crunching of dry leaves filled her ears as she turned her head left and right to look for any signs of the familiar ash-blonde head. 

“Mhng~!” 

Her ears perked up at the muffled sound from the nearby tree. 

Did someone get hurt? Or maybe it’s you and Albedo doing the research. Sucrose hasn’t seen anyone wandering around here so it’s a possibility it could be either you or Albedo.

She seeks the source of the sound, gradually increasing in volume the more steps she takes and her whole face and body went aflame at the scandalous acts of the Chief Alchemist and his assistant. She quickly hid behind the tree and concealed her mouth with both hands.

“A-Albedo...! Hah... mng~!! Faster p-please!” You begged, tightly gripping on his arm as he held your body close to him while your other hand was resting on the bumpy trunk whilst he pounds in and out of you frantically.

“Faster, huh...?” 

You bit your lip harshly, almost grazing the skin to emit blood when he thrust his hips against yours hitting your sweet spot that weakened your knees. You can’t think clearly. The overwhelming pleasure is filling you up and you’re beginning to see stars the more he hits that one certain spot. You want him to go deeper, you want to listen to his moans of your name, you want his fingers to leave marks on your hips.

You’re tightly hugging his cock, you’re taking his size so well, and you wanted more of him. 

Faster,

Deeper,

More,

More

More...!

You moaned his name as you cum on his cock, and Albedo finds himself being pushed on the edge as well when you clamped your thighs together. With just a few more thrusts he can reach his climax as well. 

His eyes quickly darted to the side when he saw small movements and rustling from the bushes. His motions faltered a bit, slowing down his pace and loosening his grip on your hips. You whined at the lack of pleasure that filled you that slowly died down and ran out of your system. 

Looking over your shoulder to take a peek at him, his eyes were focused on the opposite side of the forest. Before you could even open your mouth to voice your concern, your eyes went dark all of a sudden. Warm and hot breathing was caressing against him and your throat bounced in turbulence as if Albedo had another plan on fucking you twice in a row.

“Focus on me,” His silky voice echoed in your ears as he proceeded on smacking his body with yours once again.

He’s very much aware his other assistance noticed them. But did that stop him from fucking you and making you cum again? 

No.

Poor Sucrose immediately dashed out from the forest in fear if the Chief Alchemist caught her red-handed from peeping and disturbing his study.

i just finished the island quest today and i was just thinking,, pegging albedo on a beach or smth at night and you’re at one of the island further away from the camps so he can be as loud as he wants. head empty, just albedo’s screams 😳😳

gn!reader + beach sex (empty island) + anal penetration + handjob + overstimulation.

"W-What if someone hears," He bites back a groan, you two were having sex right here on the beach of Minacious Isle, out in the open as if it were nothing. You coo softly, rubbing small circles into his hips with your thumbs, slowly sliding into him further.

"There isn't anybody around for miles, it's just you and me on this island, nobody is gonna hear a thing, so just let it all out, okay? If you hold back," you lean forward, chest pressed against his back, lips right by his ear. "Then I'll have no choice but to coax each and every," you slowly pull out, "sound out of you!" You thrust back in deeply, and he gasps, moaning and rolling his eyes back at the pleasant warmth that suddenly exploded in his gut. "See? You sound so pretty~" You chirp, "Now scream for me, baby boy."

With that your thrust only became more impatient, wanting to hear him scream— he didn't hold back a single moan, his throat going raw at how much he was screaming and moaning for you. Tears formed in his eyes when you finally touched his achy dick, slick noises as you pump his cock and thrust into his ass. "Ah! P-Please! Hnnn, nggh!" He chokes on a groan, desperately trying to grip at the sand below him but it gives him no hold, only making him want to cry as his hands resort to balling up into fist instead, his nails digging into his palms harshly. "G-Gonna,"

"Already? Tsk, tsk," you slow to a stop, both thrusting and jerking him off, and revel in the whines he lets out freely.

"Wanna cum, please, please," Albedo is being so loud, not a care in his pretty mind anymore, just wanting to feel his own pleasure. "Please let me cum," he breathes shakily, peering over his shoulder at you, his face completely flushed. "Please." He batted his lash and you bark a laugh.

"Alright, pretty boy, you can cum this time." He praises your name, thanking you for being so merciful.

With that you resume your actions, easily sliding in his ass, taking your dick so well. Your hand wraps around him again, and you thumb at his slit before slowly moving your hand up and down, up and down, twisting nicely.

Once again he lets out the most beautiful noises, drool dribbling down his chin as he loses all control of himself, succumbing to your touch. His vision blurs, body hot, the sounds of you hitting so deep in him making his dick twitch, pulling him closer to the edge.

"C... Cum- Cumming!" He cries out, thighs tensing and throwing his head back. Sweet gasps for air mixed with choked out, high-pitched moans. Thick ropes of white spurt out, landing on the sand below you two. You slowly slide out of him once you've milked him dry and he falls to the side on his back, sand sticking to his sweat-covered body. He pants, staring up at the stars, his vision slowly clearing. "Ah, hah..."

"You sound so pretty, baby!" You exclaim, his vision now filled with you, you hovering over him and he whines, shaking his head.

"A-Again?" He rasps, throat sore from screaming so much just a few moments ago. You nod, nuzzling into his neck before biting and then lapping over the bite, a red mark appearing.

"Can you do that for me, 'bedo? Will you make such pretty noises for me again? It's be a shame to waste this opportunity." He grunts, turning his head to the side and allowing you more access to leave hickies along his neck. "Is that a yes?" He hums, nodding and you chuckle, your hand landing on his chest and slowly moving down, you'd coax every single noise out of this man.

doodles inspited by @pbeltarts titanic au cause i’m always a hoe for pretty ladies on period drama costumes

Prince of Abyss [Aether x Male Reader]

Notes: Instead of being Lumine as Princess of Abyss, Aether will be the prince while Lumine will be the MC.

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⭒ kaeya, xiao, diluc, and albedo: argument repercussions hcs ⭒

request for anon: hello!!! was wondering if i could request kaeya, xiao, and any genshin characters who had a huge argument with y/n just before their mission/quest and they say some really hurtful words to y/n—like ‘burden’ or 'pathetic’ (btw the genshin bois didn’t come with you to the mission)

then y/n gets attacked and gravely injured during the mission; the guards who accompanied them insist they call [genshin character] for help but y/n says no—still hurt from the argument because they don’t wanna be a burden, or be pathetic. y/n tells them to head back home and that they can handle it on their own

the guards left y/n because they were persistent, but reader never came back

[genshin character] is worried that the guards came home without them so after many more hours and they still hadn’t come home, they go back to the mission site only to find y/n on the ground, lying in their pool of blood; unconscious and barely has any pulse

[genshin character] asks why they left them be and the guards tell him that the last words they told them was not wanting to be a burden

this breaks [genshin character]’s heart because y/n is on death’s door just because of them, and now they feel awfully guilty— regretting ever telling them those hurtful words which could lead to their death, and the thought of y/n thinking they’re pathetic and a burden to everyone before dying makes them feel worse—y/n’s pained and hurtful expression during their argument tormenting him

oh god it’s too much–i’m sorryyy :< i hope it’s not too much pressure :’( i’ve been craving for some hardcore angst and prompts like these are my faves:// you don’t have to do it tho! but if you do, thank you so so sooo muchh <33 again, don’t feel pressured to do it and feel free to ignore itt

NOOO DO NOT APOLOGIZE THIS WAS SO GOOD I GOT THIS AND IMMEDIATELY SHOWED ONE OF MY PARTNERS AND OUR FRIEND BECAUSE ITS SO TASTY AND WE ALL THRIVE ON ANGST

i did slightly alter a few things for some parts, but each hc list follows the same main path! i hope this lives up to what you wanted, i had an absolutely blast writing it :)

⭒

pairing: kaeya, xiao, diluc, and albedo x reader (separately)

characters: kaeya alberich, xiao, diluc ragnvindr, albedo

genre: angst

word count: 1963

warnings: very brief mentions of injury/blood

⭒

kaeya

⋆ though kaeya rarely means any insults he throws at you, there are times when he’s not thinking and lets something slip—something that stings

⋆ neither of you can really recall what sets off your argument shortly before you leave, but it quickly escalates, and kaeya snaps at you

⋆ “are you so useless that you can’t do anything for yourself?”

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