God Is Dead And You Are Victorious, Yet You Still Pray?

a little comic about kisses and curses. happy halloween!

is it really true that the average person's pain level is a 0?

hgn... the AUs in my head demand freedom...

note: all aus will eventually escape my brain, this poll is to decide which one I should hyper-fixate on right now.

au descriptions under the cut:

Witch Town au:

after Draxum's lab explodes, Splinter stays in the mystic city instead of going above ground, eventually moving to Witch Town. April is still friends with the turtles (she met them via portal practice accident with Leo). Each of the turtles would have a different magic specialty (all I have figured out so far is Donnie == an alchemist, and maybe Leo == illusions/ stage magic). This AU starts like a month before the show begins and then continues through the events of ROTTMNT, mostly exploring what would happen if the turtles had WAY more practice with mysticism than in the show.

important notes:

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Triple divorce au:

Draxum made the turtles completely legally, with both Big Mama and Lou Jitsu/Splinter agreeing to it, so long as they both got to have a presence in the turtles' lives growing up, however, after the turtles were made, Big Mmama tried to get full custody rights over the turtles but the court said no to that. TLDR Draxum and Splinter get joint custody over the turtles, with Big Mama getting visitation every other week. Splinter gets weekdays and draxum weekends. Draxum has his redemption arc much sooner in this au, realizing that not all humans suck after getting to know April through the turtles. This AU focuses on the turtles growing up and how their lives would be, and the main plot of ROTTMNT, just with draxum being good the whole time. (this entire AU came from me thinking "What if they knew Big Mama as like their mom who divorced their dad" while watching Bug Busters for the Nteenth time)

important notes:

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IDK what to call this AU:

Big Mama accepts Splinter's marriage proposal but first reveals that she's a yokai, Splinter doesn't care at all and says he'll love her no matter what, and moves in with her. Eventually, he decides to fight in the battle nexus, because it seems exciting (note: he CHOOSES to fight in it and can stop at any time he wants, unlike in canon where he had no choice). After fighting for a while, draxum sees him and decides to use him for the mutants like in Cannon, UNLIKE in Cannon however, Big Mama comes in right after the explosion and right before Splinter gets mutated, having her watch as he gets mutated, she rushes in and takes him & the turtles home. Big Mama puts a bounty on Draxums head for what he did. The Turtles grow up with Big Mama and Splinter as their parents. They met April because she and her family were staying in the Nexus Hotel after a mold infestation in their home. This AU follows the plot of the show. (pls give ideas for the name of this, I'm begging)

important notes: Splinter x Big Mama, Leo is the heir to Big Mama's empire

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Adopted Cass AU:

On 7-year-old Cassandra Jones's first day in the foot clan, before she really had strong ties to it, she fell down an open manhole while she & the other recruits were following Foot Lieutenant and sprained her ankle, but it's ok! they'll come back for her in 3 minutes, just wait! Then 3 minutes becomes 30 minutes, becomes 60 minutes, becomes 3 hours... no one is coming to get her, are they? eventually, she's found & taken in by Splinter and raised as the turtle's intense, but well-meaning, sister.

blorbocore

Thank you, /r/ProgrammerHumor, I love you endlessly.

Redditors competing to make the worst volume sliders possible...

I’ve had this queued for like a year

Only day you can reblog this

and I’m somehow both of them.

odysseus’s ultimate dream is to hand the work over to his very capable wife who was the only backbone of ithaca for the past 20 years and become a househusband who drinks wine and watches soap operas everyday

modern au where odysseus got drafted lmao

BUGS - me for no reason