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The Gondola

Have you ever misinterpreted something and really just questioned how that your version was the misinterpretation? 

It all started when school decided, many decades ago, that children were clearly going to pay attention at 7:30 am to a lecture on the French Revolution. Luckily for my class our teacher recognized that we would not be listening unless he woke us up first. So he preceded with his tried and true method, second only to giving us donuts, and third to jumping-jacks, was by gossiping about school and just life with us. 

So we did our usual morning conversations of a few of the more extroverted kids telling us what they did on the weekend, my only friend in the class ignoring everything to draw for a mother competing she entered, and then proceeding to us pestering the teacher with personal questions. This led to the very American question- 

“Hey, you're a public school teacher with three kids, how do you mange to live in the ‘rich kids neighborhood?’”

And that is where he began the Gondola story. And in actuality his story was shorter than my introduction. He simply answered-

“My wife fell off a Gondola before we met, and she sued the ranch.” 

Now, there are many things I misinterpreted from that sentence alone, but no, it got much worse because the second he said that, the entire class(Except my lone friend who was still nose deep in her iPad) gasped and asked if she(his wife) was alright, okay, doing well, etc. Well, those are okay-ish reactions, I guess. I mean, was the water dirty? 

If you haven’t guessed by this point, when I heard the word “Gondola” I assumed we were talking about the small Italian boat. I wasn’t even hung up on how the wife was doing, I assumed a small 1 foot drop in some water was not life threatening, I mean she clearly lived, this is before she married our history teacher. I was hung up on that he said “sued” and “Ranch.” I was not aware that Gondola’s were like Ubers, or taxi’s, I thought they sort of individually did that sort fo thing. And why would there be a Gondola on a ranch? 

But those questions were immediately shunted to the bottom of the list after what came next. The most prominent follow up question was-

“How far did she fall?”

What? It is a Gondola. How far could she have possibly fallen?

“85 feet.” 

Now most of my class reacted as one would suspect, with loud gases and “oh-no’s.” But I’m not most of my class. My only thought was ‘what?’ I had moved on from her safety by this point because my only reference for how far a human has to fall to die is 630 feet because that’s the height of the St. Louis arch- and never mind I was more baffled by falling 85 feet out of a Gondola. 

I didn’t even begin to think that maybe I had misinterpreted something by that point because I was more troubled with trying to visualize a Gondola, with 85 stools on it and- no, how would that work? It’s too tall and the base is too small, it would topple over. Not to mention that the Gondola would never fit under any bridge, at all. 

How was this all cleared up, you might ask? Well another one of my classmates asked which ski ranch it was at- 

Yes, as I figured out my asking my only friend, in my neck of the woods we call Ski Lifts, specifically the fully enclosed ones, Gondolas. The wife is fine, she’s doing well with little-to no adverse health effects(She actually bounced off something during her fall, but it’s not my story to tell.) and my history teacher is still teaching. And that is how I misinterpreted Gondolas. 

ノル様

France’s Ego

I love it when this fandom gives characters ego’s, but I’ve been sort of disappointed with France’s one. Everyone always talks about how egotistical he is about is looks, or raising other countries, or maybe the wars. But what I want to see it France being a little gremlin. Because fun fact, France was the first European country to re-build and re-plan their cities in the wake of urbanization. France literally rebuilt Paris from eh ground up to add larger streets, rows of trees, public parks, and boulevards. 

So I want to see France hold it over Englands head that during the second industrial revolution, that even while England was revolutionizing germ theory, France started the trend of re-planning cities to accolade more people, and that the rest of Europe followed France’s lead. 

I want France to talk to Italy about architecture near England to just rub it in his face that he didn’t think of re-planning the cities first, I just France to have a legitimate win that he can be egotistical about, something he did that bettered the world. Yeah he’s pretty, yeah he was on the winning side of both world wars, but he also esstainly started the trend of not living in overcrowded cities. 

there are guys in my dorm who decided to play cards in the elevator

“Any ideas for the new park sculpture?”

“How about a giant, metallic octopus attacking a rook?”

“Perfect.”

All characters belong to a graphic novel project: Project “D” (Which means that all illustrations were made to fit the characters. I’m by no means “judging”  signs and categorizing them as dark or light or anything.) 

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Despite what you see on this sub, Firefall isn’t all that Yosemite has to offer | Yosemite National Park, USA | [OC] [3712x4640] - Author: CameronKelsey on reddit

Raya and the Last Dragon felt like a bit of a missed opportunity to showcase the beautifully unique shapes and sensibilities of SEAsian art styles in their dragon design. I couldn’t help but try my hand at pushing that aesthetic in her design just a little bit more. Her colors in the official art are very unusual for the style, too…but I tried to keep them for this. I couldn’t help but include some gold, though. (also, this is all in good fun, there’s probably a million reasons why Disney went with the more Japanese fish-kirin look in the end. But!! I hope that this’ll inspire more folks in the area to make dragons inspired by the culture and mythology here!! Because it’s unique and beautiful!!)

It’s bad news when you combine them with Bastards like me who look at notable Asshat Otto Von Bizzmarck and decides he’s Biz for short and deserves a story. 

bitches be like "i'm so mentally ill about this man" and the man is german chancellor and noted conservative asshat otto von bismarck. it's me, i'm bitches.