A Lot Of Stuff That Is Transandrophobic Is Really Similar To Butchphobia

Hi, I'm genuinely looking for an explanation here and not looking for an argument /srs

Can you explain how calling a transfem a TERF for spreading ideology that I genuinely assumed was included in the definition of TERFism is othering ? Not to be that guy, but I'm autistic and I'm having a very hard time connecting the points you're making, and I genuinely want to learn and understand what you're saying /gen

Again, I do hope this doesn't come off as hostile, I am genuinely trying to learn and understand better, and I want to be able to fix misconceptions about what a TERF is in my own mind, and I haven't seen anyone bring this point up before /gen

You absolutely do not have to answer this, but I hope you have a fabulous rest of your day, and I do apologize for what I said, as it wasn't necessary for me to comment on the situation.

Yeah totally! Okay, I got a lot of this from Ibram X. Kendi's "How to be Antiracist"* where he talks about describing "racist" as an identity means that hardly anyone is going to ever "identify" with it, even if they are a racist. It's much more helpful to talk about actions being racist or anti-racist. Someone committing racist acts speaks far more to the vulnerability of anyone to cause harm, rather than it being something ONLY reserved for someone with the identity of "racist". For example, Clarence Thomas, a black man, has done untold amounts of harm to the black population in the US. If we subscribe to the "oh, (X) can't be racist, they are (a minority)" train of thought, it means people are less likely to understand that Clarence Thomas commits racist acts. In the same way, describing yourself as an anti-racist is not enough, as it can let people be comfortable with racist actions because they think "oh, I'm an anti-racist, I can't commit acts of racial harm." That's why it's more helpful to describe acts as racist and anti-racist rather than framing them as identities.

In a similar way, describing someone as the label of "TERF" can have a similar effect. Because it's specifically a label centered around being anti-trans, transgender people of all kinds will easily assume they cannot be transphobic, because the label of TERF is ideologically opposed to their existence. It invites ridicule rather than introspection. By saying actions can be transphobic, I think it helps a lot more because it's easier to understand that trans people can be transphobic. For example, Blaire White is right there. Despite being a trans woman, she is actively doing transphobic acts. By calling out an action as transphobic rather than describing someone as a "TERF", it helps fight back against the idea that being trans means you cannot be transphobic. For a super duper simple example, I can step on my dogs tail, but it doesn't mean I hate dogs, it means I committed an act of harm against my dog. Describing me as a dog-hater when I LOVE dogs would invite ridicule more than it would a tendency to watch my step when my dog is in the house. I hope this makes sense!

*I'm not trying to say the Black and Trans experience is exactly the same, just that like any oppressed group, there is a lot of overlap in tactics and thinking, especially for people who are Black and Trans. Reading about other groups can really give you a ton of helpful insight on how to work within your own identity!

trans men will say something like "having access to reproductive care is something that affects me personally, even as a man. i understand that conservatives speak about it as if it's a woman-only issue, but they see trans men as women too, and losing access to these services would affect us just as much. it'd be nice to be able to add my perspective and experiences to the conversation and have them taken seriously" and people will go "oh so you're erasing women? you're speaking over women? you hate women? you're a misogynist? typical man?"

like for the love of god "this issue affects me just as much as it affects you" does not mean "i think im more important than you" and its wild how many people take it that way. no reasonable trans man is actually trying to make discussions about abortion or trans healthcare or etc exclusively about them, and if you take it as a threat whenever a trans guy opens their mouth in a discussion like this, then that's your problem to work through, not theirs

This is obviously a strawman, but it feels like the original poster is also making a really dangerous argument here.

No, having a bad experience does not mean you can be bigoted towards a marginalized community. It does not give you a free pass to use slurs, or claim an entire group of people is evil.

I was abused by a cis queer woman. That doesn't mean I can post "I hate all women especially cis queer women", because that would be fucked up, misogynistic, and queerphobic! It doesn't matter that I included "cis" in that statement, because it is still targeting a marginalized community.

Too many people on here think being trans or a victim of abuse gives them a free pass to be as bigoted as they want, as long as their target is a trans man or a "theyfab."

ill take 'things that never happened' for $500 please

this person (can't find pronouns) is posting even worse shit about trans men now. Saw some really creepy things on the blog when I went to block them. report this dumbass!

yikes.

Can we take a moment to think about the younger trans men and mascs on tumblr right now?

I was a teenager when ace and transmed discourses were at their peaks, and I can’t exaggerate how badly it affected me then.

Now trans men are the latest target, and I’m terrified for trans kids.

It’s easy to say “intracommunity discourse is an online problem! Go talk to queer people irl!”, but people forget that so many kids and teenagers do not have safe or reliable access to IRL LGBT+ communities and support groups. For many, online spaces are the only option.

We need to make sure the younger members of our community are being heard, and block out the hateful voices with messages of support and encouragement. Things are bad enough for trans people right now, and it's easy to forget that trans minors are often the ones suffering the most.

To any younger trans men or transmasculine people reading this:

The hate you are experiencing isn’t normal, it hasn’t always been like this, and it won’t always be this way. It is bleeding out from a small, miserable group of self-absorbed jerks.

Don’t feel obligated to call them out, don’t feel like you have to interact with these people. Please don’t doomscroll through discourse tags; it will make you feel like everyone is out to get you.

If you want to speak up for your community, that’s fine, but please take a break if you feel like your mental health is worsening. Block anybody who so much as breathes rudely in your direction.

You’re just as trans as the rest of us. You are welcome here.

Oh, and if you want to seek out external resources and groups, PFLAG helped me a lot when I was younger. It is an American-based organization, however, so if anyone has recommendations for those living outside of the US, please let me know in the reblogs!

Stop only supporting trans men and trans women because you sexualize us. That's not as progressive as you think it is.

Support trans lives, not because we're hot, but because we're trans. And also hot.

*grabs your hands and speaks to you in a tone that is so gentle* they/them pronouns stop being universal once you learn a person's pronouns. Sometimes that person's pronouns will include they/them and in that specific case you are allowed to keep using those pronouns for that person. In any case where you learn a persons pronouns and that person doesn't use they/them, you should no longer use those pronouns for that person. If you continue to use they/them pronouns knowing that person doesn't use them, you are now misgendering that person. Kindly stop doing that please. Thank you, I love you.

"i am agab" ❌

"i was agab" ✅

"agab" (assigned gender at birth) describes a past event where you were merely assigned a label by a doctor

not biological sex,

and not an identity label.

we got another good news roundup!

the fight is still on! don’t give up!

I'm so sick of this.

I see a post, and think "Oh hey this person has really good takes on transmisogyny!"

And then I go to follow their blog and it’s full of rancid shit about trans men and nonbinary people they all assume to be AFAB.

I hate that this is happening more often lately. It’s not hard to advocate for trans women without tearing other minorities down.