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As a random thought...

So in the comics Hawkeye has 80% hearing loss.

The Black Widow is Russian.

Can you imagine when they’re on a mission and something goes wrong; the police are about to arrest them and they fall back on Plan H.

Black Widow, “So remember, you’re deaf and I don’t speak English”

somehow instead of saying "as a treat", I've started using the phrase "for morale", as if my body is a ship and its crew, and I (the captain) have to keep us in high spirits, lest we suffer a mutiny in the coming days.

and so I will eat this small block of fancy cheese, for morale. I will take a break and drink some tea, for morale. I will pick up that weird bug, for morale.

I'm not sure if it helps, but it does entertain me

This is exactly Tumblr coded

Trans:

As the oldest of the Seven, the two’s relationship goes back several thousand years.

The first time the anemo archon visited Liyue, the Geo archon greeted him believing he was in need of his help. Yet the anemo archon was only there to drink with him.

Since then, the archons would gather to drink together. Now, all that remains is the two of them.

They call one another “the clueless bard that can’t read the wind” and “hard headed old man”, names perhaps they can only use because of how well they know each other

——————

zhongven shippers come get y’alls food

My bones shiver with yearning for fleah

Venti and Zhongli have a bond that can only be formed from committing war crimes and multiple atrocities against humanity together.

After going through the Archon war and watching/actively participating in the eternal imprisonment and/or murder of most gods until there were only a handful left: wow I’m so glad we’ll never have to contribute to such a mass slaughter ever again.

Roughly 2,500 years later, in Khaenri’ah: oh no

You cannot tell me that wouldn’t create the weirdest relationship ever from an outsiders perspective.

Zhongli pulls Venti away from some asshole who keeps trying to hit on Venti and isn’t taking no for an answer. Everyone watching commends him because he’s watching out for his partner, but Zhongli doesn’t get why. Because in reality Zhongli’s seen Venti decapitate someone for the same reason a few hundred years ago and he really just didn’t want to have to clean blood out of his jacket.

If you ask him about weapons Venti is surprisingly extremely knowledgeable. People assume despite his looks he must be extremely familiar in wielding each of the weapons talked about. But the actual only reason he knows all of it is because during periods of war Zhongli would drone on for hours about different benefits of each weapon an their subtypes for different kinds of battle.

They have each thrown entire mountains/typhoons at each other not as threats or genuine attempt to hurt each other. More so because they’re both multiple millennium old gods and that’s just their equivalent of play fighting.

When they’re together They’ll casually mention something about the archon war, to people that know who they are, like it wasn’t even a big deal. And the people they were talking to have to reevaluate their entire image of the two they made in their head because whatever the most sadistic thing they could think of couldn’t even compare to what the two just admitted to.

I don’t know I just think people should play with the fact these two are VERY old and literal gods who’ve witnessed most of Tevyats history and development more