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Is this anything

I had to make it because the mental image of Diogee as ‘woke dog’ was killing me

Me, getting on Tumblr: Alright, now no getting distracted! We're here for writing ideas.

Tumblr: Lol, look it's a gay character.

Me: Liked and moving on to-

Tumblr: He's played by Finn Wolfhard

Me: ...reblogged and away I go to find-

Tumblr: Oh look the post below has something Ben Schwartz related on it...

Me: Oh fuck that would be a problem but there's not enough Ben content on here to make me spend an hour looking through it so it's fine-

Google: Hey, Pinterest has a notification for you also one of your mutuals on Tumblr just posted.

Me: OH SHIT-

ostrich memes 10-15

Beware the Beast

Reblog if you're hoping 2011 will be a fresh start.

I have so many thoughts and they all go to Tumblr

every time i listen to “you’re a mean one mr. grinch” i can’t help but sit there and think “what did the grinch do to hurt you?” because dude just stands there for 2 minutes and 58 seconds and drags the grinch into the dirt

*spends an hour researching calendar dates, doing weird math, and revising a huge part of my story*

Me: Wait, what was I doing?

Me: Oh, yeah!

*Googles where commas go in dates*

Man life is funny when you just stop giving a shit. Like you distance yourself. Act like you're not a human experiencing the fall of humanity, imagine ur an alien watching it. Watching them scramble to pick up the pieces they themselves broke.

However we got here I don't know, but for this metaphor let's say god's how. God is you in this metaphor. You've just placed your very fish hungry cat into a fish tank. The fish tank has to water but a multitude of fish. All the cat must do is eat the fish. The cat then grows a fucking hand and fucking fills the tank with water. Then when the cat cannot breathe it's shocked. It hops and skips for air and gives up because, "Well not much I can do about it; I mean I'm only a cat." The cat is thinking. So the cat just slowly fucking drowns. And you just stand there like,

And you're simply in too much shock to help your drowning cat and honestly the fish might be dead too they were out of the water for a while. And what the fuck is going on and why the fuck did your cat GROW A FUCKING ARM!??!?!?!??!?

Anyway so in this metaphor, God is you, the cat is humanity, the arm is economics and fossil fuel and colonisation, the fishes are earth and existence, and of course the water is the global issues we're facing.

The point is, if a cat growing an arm and drowning itself isn't funny to you, get rid of the water pussy. Get it? Pussy. It's a cat metaphor- Anyway! If it is funny to you then like just fucking watch! Like see what happens. I don't know!? Maybe the arm comes back and grabs a bucket. The funniest and most likely outcomes are,

1.) The cat just fucking sits down and takes it, slowly drowning with a care in the world. (We all die like the dinos did)

2.) The cat freaks out and pushes the fish tank over and it explodes into a million shards of glass. (Apocalypse senario)

3.) The cat stands up and steps out of the tank. (Moving planets)

4.) The cat drinks the water and then chokes and dies (We use our problems to cause more problems)

5.) The cat grabs a bucket and slowly dumps out the water. (We fix this shit)

Either way I'm rooting for 5 but I cannot wait to see what happens, especially if it's six. Oh six is the cat growing gills which is basically just the frog in a pot metaphor where we all just get used to the planet being on fire and not being able to breathe nice air.

Any bye!!!!!