Stargirl | Matildas X Original Character Masterlist

hi,

i don’t usually come on here to say these things but it’s kind of very much crossed a line so please hear me out…

just wanted to say to the community that reads us writer’s fics, for free mind u, that telling writers to off themselves is not funny xx

you’re given something free to enjoy, that REAL people put their hard work and effort into, that can take hours or days or weeks to write, and you repay them by wishing them death and saying horrible things to them. all you’re achieving is making people wanna stop writing on this app.

if you fucking losers wanna say things so bad and be outright horrible to people, turn yourselves off anonymous u fucking pussies.

i’m lucky enough that i don’t get messages myself cos my asks are basically empty, but all your actions have is negative repercussions. you’ve driven away one of my favoutie mutual writers who is a lovely person, kindly helped people with their personal problems with the safety of anonymity, and wrote some of the most quality fics i’ve ever read. and now you’re doing it to other writers.

if you have something against the writer’s work or writer block them! it’s a simple click of a button, no need to get all outlandish and horrible about it…

it’s fucking childish behaviour and you need to fucking grow up. get a fucking life.

remember we aren’t slaves for your entertainment. we are real people, in the real world, with real lives. please treat us like it.

(excuse my language, but technically if you are on my blog you should all be adults and be able to deal with it, thanks!! if you’re not an adult, why are you here? please leave)

Stargirl | matildas x original character fic [part thirteen]

Words; 1.8k

Pairings; matildas team x astrid taylor (OC)

Warnings; swearing

A/N; Hi all. Hope you're enjoying this story. Just wanted to apologise for such a late update and a really short chapter but I started a second job and I've got less time to write so updates may take a little longer sorry. But I will try to keep it within two weeks of each other and write when I can so you guys can keep reading. Love you all xx

masterlist

The next morning after breakfast the team assembled for their pre match meeting where they would do last minute reviews of their opponents style of play, and plan their own around the starting lineup Tony was going to reveal. 

Astrid’s prediction from the night before was proved right when Kyra’s name appeared in the midfield, a smile donning both of their faces as Astrid lightly punched Kyra’s shoulder. The rest of the line up was almost the same as it always was but with Cortnee replacing Sam’s usual position as the left forward and Charli staying in that back right in replace of Ellie who was still out with her ACL injury.

Although Astrid had yet to be named again in the starting XI since that Phillipines game, the plan involved her coming on later in the game and continuing her super sub reputation. 

Arriving at Kingsmeadow again the energy was high and the team were ready for what was to come. They got ready and headed onto the pitch for the warm up, Astrid, Charli and Kyra trailing at the back of the group. 

“Will you three hurry up? Otherwise you’re not part of the rondos.” Alanna turned around, yelling at the three of them who were still slowly walking out of the tunnel. 

“How dare you!” Astrid dropped her mouth in shock, separating from her friends as she ran to join the team, rather ditching her friends than missing out on the only fun part of warm up. 

“Rude.” Charli called out as Kyra scoffed beside her, watching the youngest player run out of the tunnel to the team on the pitch, jogging to catch up behind her. 

Training like always was full of laughter and fun, slightly distracting them before the tough match but still focused on the drills ahead of them. When it began time to partner up, Astrid began walking towards Charli but was pulled away before she could even process what was happening. 

“You’re with me today, chicken.” Steph finally spoke as she walked with Astrid further away from the younger of the Matildas. Astrid was confused but not complaining as she had begun to form a stronger bond with Steph through these camps and over long distance while at clubs. 

“Cool with me.” Astrid shrugged her shoulders as they began their partnered drills and passing skills. 

“So, how’s Hammarby?” Steph asked, looking over at the younger player. 

“It’s really good, I think I’ve finally settled back into the team and the rhythm again.” Astrid smiled as she talked about her club. 

“That’s good. You always want to feel good at your club and comfortable in that environment.” Steph nodded at her, happy she was content in her current club and team. “What about Sweden though? How’s living there treating you?” 

“It’s fine, I’m glad I have Kyra and Nevs with me, and Charli not far away.” Astrid drifted off slightly and looked back up at Steph instead of the ball they were sending between each other.

“But?” Steph quizzed, looking her softly in the eye, Astrid pausing to think before responding.

“I don’t know. Something’s missing or off, I think. It’s just not what I’ve been used to, you know. Especially with a whole different language and customs and lifestyle; it’s just different.” Astrid shrugged casually. “But I’ll get used to it, and the weather.” She laughed with Steph who also missed the Australian sun whilst living away.

“It’ll get better, that feeling of being misplaced sorta. I promise.” Steph pulled Astrid into her side as they began to walk back to the group who were finishing up their warm ups as well.

They all returned to the locker room, changing from their training gear to their game jerseys, Astrid donning her 31 proudly as the subs exited the room, hyping up the starting line up as they went past. 

Courtney and Astrid sat beside each other on the bench as they waited for the match to start. The whistle blew and the ball was taken into quick and easy possession by the Australian side, keeping it close to them and weaving through the South Africa defence. A few chances were made within early minutes, almost getting Astrid out of her seat ready to celebrate, but it wasn’t till Steph took a corner at the fifth minute that she was able to. 

Steph struck with her left foot and the ball headed straight to Mary who attempted to head it in but struck the post, Cortnee saw it and quickly knocked it into the net, scoring her first international goal on the senior team. 

“YES VINEY!” Astrid screamed from the bench, cheering loudly as the players on the field celebrated Cortnee’s goal; Tony also cheering loudly from his place in the tactical box. 

And it wasn’t long until they were celebrating again, Cortnee knocking the ball into the net just 10 minutes later, bringing the Matildas to an easy 2-0 and getting herself a brace. Polkinghorn further advanced their lead just before halftime with a header from another one of Steph’s corners, letting the Matildas leave halftime 3-0 as they retreated down the tunnel. 

While the starting XI were having their halftime meeting with Tony, Astrid took this time to practise her shots with Macca and Courtney for a few minutes before the two younger players were called over to the bench again. They discussed the tactics again for the second half and when they were both going to come on to make a difference in the game, not that there was anything wrong with how it was panning out so far. 

The second half began with the kick from Vine, the Matildas once again taking quick possession and earning corners as they stayed down near the box. Caitlin was the one to give them their next goal, taking a long ball from Aivi to Steph and dancing around the defenders to send it to the right side of the net. 

Astrid and Courtney got up not long after that to warm up once again, running up and down the sidelines as they watched the game progress.

At 70 minutes the Australian side made three substitutions, taking off Steph, Caitlin and Charli and bringing on Courtney, Astrid and Larissa as their replacements; the three of them quickly settled into the rhythm of the game and added to the dynamics of the players on the field. 

Astrid came into the left forward position, slightly further up to where Caitlin had been playing before but somewhere she was more comfortable and was now working with Hayley and Larissa up front. It didn’t take long for Astrid to get her feet on the ball, running ahead of Chidiac who delivered it to her in open space and she slotted it past the South African goalkeeper into the bottom right corner. 

The team were thrilled with her contribution so early after coming on, bringing them to 5-0 at 75 minutes in; but it’s not like they were surprised, it’s what she’s known to do. 

Only 3 minutes later and the ball had landed at her feet just outside the box, but she was surrounded by defenders, all eagerly watching her feet to see where she might go. Astrid paused, lifting her eyes up to the defender in front of her before shifting it in the direction of Hayley who was free to the right of her. 

She moved her left foot, indicating to go right where her eyeline was, the defender turning over her left shoulder but Astrid quickly rolled the ball under her foot and went around her other shoulder. She could hear the defender groan as she tricked her, running closer to the goal, jumping over an outstretched leg from South Africa and continuing the ball towards the goal. Striking with her right foot hard, she aimed for top bins as the keeper bent down to block a low shot, missing it completely. 6-0 to Australia. 

The small Australian crowd who had gathered cheered and so did the girls as they surrounded Astrid who made her way to Kyra first like always. As they parted Kyra pointed to her mouthing, “You owe me lunch.” with a smirk. She was right so far; but so was Astrid as Kyra didn’t seem to be coming off anytime soon and they were inching closer and closer to full time. 

Chloe and Sam joined the field with only 7 minutes of regulation time remaining and just minutes after South Africa scored their first goal of the match in the 87th minute after a terrific lob from Hilda Magaia. 

Three minutes of injury time were given and Astrid was not ready to finish up, neither were any of the Matildas subs who felt like they had just begun to play. 

And with only 40 seconds of time remaining, Courtney delivered the ball to Kyra who then shot it up the field in the direction of Astrid who had made her way into the box, watching as the ball flew in the air. There were a few defenders closing in on her but she had plenty of space, jumping into the air and joining her head with the ball, steering it hard to her left and hoping the keeper was just away from her. 

She landed and looked into the net, finding the ball rolling on the ground and the net still rippling from the impact; she scored another goal and earned herself a hattrick for the first time on the international stage. A wide smile donned her face as she spotted Sam, Hayley and the rest of the team running towards her, screaming and cheering for the youngest player. 

It’s a late goal and a hattrick from number 31 Astrid Taylor, the 18 year old in her 8th appearance for the Matildas. 

Play resumed but not for long as the whistle blew and the game ended 7-1 to Australia, both teams immediately shaking hands with one another and their own teammates. Charli ran over to Astrid when she was free, almost tackling her to the ground. 

“Just casually scores a hattrick within the last like 20 minutes of the game. Are you even human?” Charli squeezed Astrid who laughed at her. 

“Fuck off.” Astrid playfully pushed her away as they began their victory lap, clapping to the crowd that had gathered for the match and waving to the Matildas fans. 

“You just had to be the only one right huh?” Kyra had caught up to Astrid who walked behind everyone else taking in the post-match feeling. 

“I guess I did.” Astrid casually shrugged her shoulders as she turned to Kyra with a smile. 

“I’m proud of you.” Kyra unexpectedly pulled Astrid into a hug but she quickly reciprocated. 

“Thank you, I’m proud of you too.” Astrid spoke as they parted, both with blushed cheeks and large smiles. “So,” They began walking again. “When are you taking me out for my free lunch?” 

to be continued....

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Stargirl | matildas x original character fic [part fifteen]

Words; 1.5k

Pairings; matildas team x astrid taylor (OC)

Warnings; mini panic attack

masterlist

After two days of training at the stadium, game day finally came and everyone was more than ready. Especially Astrid when it had been revealed during their pre match talk that she would be in the starting line up today. It was safe to say she did not expect that, gasping in shock when Tony revealed her name and the rest of the team cheered her on. But after her performance against South Africa and during training, the coaches were more than certain she deserved it. 

Astrid was very nervous once they headed to the changeroom after a warm up, feeling the pressure she was putting on herself start to bubble up. She hadn’t started for the national team since the game she got injured in, only coming on later in the games as fresh legs and she was very worried her performance wasn’t going to meet everyone's expectation. 

Her leg bounced up and down, hands shaking slightly as she sat on the bench, everyone around her finishing up getting ready for the game. Her heart was pounding and she tried to focus on taking deep breaths but it felt like she was suffocating in the room. 

Hastley, Astrid stood up and headed for the door, ignoring the calls of her teammates asking where she was going. She didn’t even know where she was going, just knew she needed to get away from everyone for a moment. An empty hallway away from the noise of the stadium was all she needed, stopping and leaning up against a wall finally being able to breathe properly. 

For a few minutes she basqued in the quiet, letting her thoughts go and emptying her mind of anything that would prevent her from having a good match. That was until she heard footsteps approaching and getting closer to her. She didn’t react, just kept her eyes closed and fell farther into the wall. 

“Hey.” A soft voice and instantly Astrid felt a wave of calm fall over her. Kyra. Astrid opened her eyes and met Kyra’s worried face. 

“Hi.” Astrid’s voice was barely a whisper. “Sorry.” She avoided Kyra’s eyes and looked down at their feet. 

“Don’t be. Just had us worried is all.” Kyra confessed and let out a soft smile. “You okay?” She asked softly, not pressuring her to respond fully. 

“Yeah. Just needed a second.” Astrid looked back up at Kyra and gave her a tight lipped smile. “Nervous.” She spoke again and Kyra just nodded. 

“You got this.” Kyra spoke into her eyes and Astrid nodded along with her, feeling her heart rate slow and more air coming back into her lungs. “Come on.” Kyra held her hand out for Astrid and waited for her. 

Astrid silently took her hand and they began walking back down the tunnels, the noise from the teams and the fans in the stands growing louder as they approached the line ups, slotting in behind Katrina. They dropped their hands quickly, Astrid sending a quick thumbs up to Charli further up the line who was looking at her with worry. 

Before she knew it, both teams were standing in position and ready to start the game, the anxiety from before now replaced with adrenaline. The whistle blew and immediately Astrid was focused on the game, running down to her position on the right side, sharing the front with Sam. 

Denmark took possession very quickly, leading the scoreline with a goal from Karen Holmgaard within 47 seconds. Astrid and Sam watched with disbelief from the other side of the pitch, knowing this would set them up for a long and hard game. 

The Matildas almost get a chance to equalise soon after, Steph sending a ball for Sam who knocked just too high over the goal and missing their chance. But Astrid is really making her mark early on with early touches and creating amazing chances for Sam in the centre. But still, nothing managed to make its way past the Denmark defence and into the back of the net. 

The half time whistle blew and the only thing the Australian could take from it was Mini’s yellow card. That didn’t stop them becoming even more motivated to turn the rest of the game over to their side. After Tony’s speech, a water break and some refocusing, the team was ready to get back out and win this match. 

The second half, Astrid was fueled with more energy than she’s ever had even though this was the longest she’s ever played for the national squad. But there was a hunger for her to equalise and overtake the Denmark side early on and take the lead. 

Astrid watched the pass from Tegan to Mini to Hayley and kept her eye on the ball, running closer to the ball and trying to keep her distance from the defenders. Hayley came close to the goal but there wasn’t enough of a clear shot for her, eyeing where Astrid was positioned near the goal and going for it. Hayley shot the ball low through the middle of two defenders and it ended at Astrid’s left foot, taking less than a second to tap it in gently past the keeper's legs and against the back of the net in the 53rd minute. 

As soon as it made it past the white line Astrid beelined it for Hayley, the two players jumping into one another over excitement for their shared goal. The rest of the girls came over screaming, piling on top of the pair and giving well deserved head pats for their fantastic footwork. 

The girls began to disperse, Charli and Kyra hanging back to give the 18 year old striker another hug before returning to their places and just like that Astrid had helped them equalise early on. 

It took another 10 minutes before Caitlin scored one of the most chill, easiest goals ever. After being thrown back in by Charli, Caitlin bounced it off her chest and passed to Mini and Hayley before the ball was sent back to her. She easily dribbled it through the defenders, basically a 5v1 at that point, before nutmegging Sørensen and letting it roll into the goal, deflecting off the fingertips of Christensen and hitting the net. 

The game ended in their favour, 4-1 to the Matildas after Mini and Caitlin scored within a minute of another and a full international game under Astrid’s belt. After congratulating each other and consolidating the other team, it was time for the post-match huddle, Astrid slipping in between the other two goal scorers of this match. 

“Sam, Steph,” Tony began. “This is your team, your talk tonight.” He smiled at the two captains who were side by side. 

“Um, me and steph were just saying the second half is what we’re about. Like, we're a pressing team and we live and die by it.” Everyone was nodding in agreement at Sam’s words.. “So it was really fucking cool to see us all going for it. And I think we’re gonna concede chances. Maybe we concede one, but the way we pressed and covered for each other.” Sam looked around the circle. “That’s what this team’s about. So we need to bring that for 90, but that second half was incredible,” Sam looked over at the goalscorers that were holding onto each other. “So well done girls.” She looked over at Steph to continue. 

“Yeah, the end was a really mature performance, as well.” Steph was moving her eyes to reach everyone in the circle. “Having five at the back defending how we did, how we organised, that’s how we’ve got to be major tournaments, that’s what it’s about. Sometimes we’ve just got to get the win and I thought we did that really well, so, good performance.” Steph concluded and everyone turned to Tony for the final words. 

“Freaking solid performance, fantastic night. Good job everyone.” The captains had said everything that was needed to, so he was more than happy to show his excitement and happiness, finishing up the huddle and leading everyone into celebration. 

The excitement over their win continued into the changerooms and eventually on the bus on the way back to the hotel. But it was safe to say Astrid was exhausted after playing a full 90 minutes for the first time in a while, beginning to fall asleep against Alanna’s shoulder. So as they arrived at the hotel, the blonde defender had the pleasant job of attempting to wake the teenager who seemed very happy against her in the seat. 

“Hey, Asteroid.” Alanna nudged her gently, Astrid groaning as she began to wake up. “We’re back at the hotel.” Astrid began to open her eyes more, seeing Alanna and a few of the other girls look down at her. 

“Coming.” She spoke softly, waving them off. They nodded and began walking off the bus, but there was someone still lurking, waiting for her. 

“Need a hand?” Kyra asked her, Astrid looking up as she retrieved her small bag, sending Kyra a tired smile.

“Thanks.” Astrid reached for Kyra’s hand and pulled herself up, bag and phone in her other hand. They began walking off the bus, always last but somehow always together.

to be continued...

Goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. | Emily Prentiss x GN!reader

Prequel to ‘Welcome Home Kiss’.

Summary; Emily’s past life has finally been revealed and it’s time to get her back. But when they don’t have her anymore Y/N finds it difficult. 

Pairing; Emily Prentiss x GN!reader, platonic!BAU team x GN!reader

Warnings; descriptions of blood/gore, heartbreak, mentions of ED, smoking, swearing (so much angst omg)

Words; 2.5k

No one is permitted to steal, copy or reblog my work as their own!!

Gif is not mine, @imagining-in-the-margins. (couldn’t find one from Emily’s funeral)

Between discovering Emily’s past life as Lauren Reynolds and finding the location of the warehouse Ian was now holding Emily, a whirlwind of emotions flowed through Y/N. Sadness, anger, disappointment and most of all worry. They were so scared for their lover; Was she okay? Was she hurt? Was she strong enough to fight back? These were all questions that flowed through their mind as they drove to the warehouse. 

After a lot of debating, Y/N had joined Derek alongside SWAT officers on their search of the building. They had already taken care of the guards out the front and now they were weaving their way through the building silently. 

*crash* 

Y/N’s ears pricked up at the loud noise coming from the building, it was close. Without hesitation Y/N took off running ahead of Derek, all logic leaving their mind as they ran to the source of the noise. 

“Y/N.” Emily managed to whisper out through the pain when she spotted them. 

“No.” A soft gasp came from Y/N’s lips as she spotted Emily lying on the ground with a wooden stake poking out of her. They ran to her, cradling her head in their hands. “Emily?” They whispered, tears pricking at their eyes. Seconds later Derek came running in, jumping down to Emily’s side. 

“I got her! I got her in the basement on the south side. I need a medic.” He spoke into his comms, the noise carrying through to everyone on the outside. “Prentiss.” He called out grabbing her hands, soft sobs coming from Y/N next to him. “Hey, it’s me. I’m right here. You’re gonna be alright.” Emily’s eyes flutter open and closed, she’s fading fast. Y/N couldn’t do anything but hold their lover’s head, watching her.

“Stay with me, baby. Come on, stay with me.” Derek panicked watching her. 

“Let me go.” Emily breathed out feeling the blood drain from her. 

“No, no. I am not letting you go.” Derek protested. “Help us!” He shouted into the large space, hoping someone would hear him. Looking back at her his heart shattered. “Listen to me. I know why you did all of this. I know what you did for Declan.” Derek tried to get Emily’s attention back but it wasn't working. “I’m so proud of you.” He spoke with grit. “You understand that? I am proud of you because you are my friend, and you are my partner.” His voice gets shaky. They both notice her eyes closing again. “No, Emily!”

“Baby, come on, stay with us.” Y/N’s voice cracked. “Don’t leave me like this.” Y/N stroked Emily’s hair like they always do. “We have our future planned out, you and me against the world, right?.” Tears dripped down their face as they shook their head. 

“If you can hear us, please just squeeze my hand.” Derek gripped onto Emily’s hand, suddenly feeling a gentle squeeze from her. “Yes, there you go. There you go, baby. Just keep squeezing.” He held her hands tightly and within seconds the medics showed up. Derek pulled himself and Y/N away from Emily, holding them tightly in his arms. 

They watched as the medics put her on a stretcher, carrying her out of the warehouse. They followed closely behind, walking in what felt like slow motion. Derek had to guide Y/N out, holding them in his grasp as they met the team outside. Y/N was in shock, every noise was muffled as they walked to the SUV, Derek slipping in beside them. All they could do was stare at whatever was in front of them, eventually getting out of the car and following the team when they reached the hospital. 

They sat in a chair in the corner for what felt like hours or days. Rossi, Hotch and Garcia tried to talk to them but they couldn’t respond, staring at the floor, legs bouncing uncontrollably.  

Eventually JJ walked over to the team, catching everyone’s attention, even Y/N’s, causing them to lift their head. The first thing they all noticed was her red eyes. 

“No.” Garcia was the first to speak, shaking her head as she began to sob. JJ swallowed. 

“She never made it off the table.” JJ finally spoke, breathing deeply. 

Y/N’s body froze, blocking out all the background noise and falling back into shock. 

The love of their life was dead. Gone. They didn’t move, they couldn’t. They were paralysed as their heart shattered into a million pieces. They looked down at their hands, still stained red with her blood. They stayed silent, still, ignoring her friends around her grieving. They didn’t know how long they sat there, staring at their hands but eventually a hand grabbed their shoulder. 

“Kiddo,” Rossi softly spoke. “Come on, you’re coming home with me.” He pulled them up from their seat by the shoulders, wrapping his arm around their shoulders. They didn’t speak, they couldn’t. Somehow they made their way to the car and eventually inside Rossi’s house. He brought them into the guest room without a word and helped them into bed. He pulled the covers up and stroked their hair. 

“Rossi,” They finally spoke, still staring at the wall in front of them. He was just about to leave the room but sat back down on the bed. “Tell me this is all just a bad dream.” Their voice cracked as they spoke, looking up at the man who treated them like his own. He hesitated, not knowing what to say. 

“It’ll be okay, I promise.” He leant down and pressed a kiss to their head, holding their hand. He stood up again and left the room, leaving the door open just in case. They didn’t fall asleep for a while, staring at the wall emotionless until exhaustion finally kicked in. This is where they stayed for the next few days, only taking water from Rossi when he forced them to drink. They didn’t eat, they barely slept, spending most of the time staring at the wall, or the ceiling, or the empty spot in the bed that they sometimes shared with Emily. 

Within days they held a funeral for Emily. And it was the hardest day of Y/N’s life. They got up and Rossi took them to their apartment so they could get dressed. It was a sunny day, Y/N felt this was wrong for a funeral. They didn’t speak to anyone, not when they carried her coffin with their teammates, not when Hotch asked them if they wanted to say a few words, and not even when Penelope approached them. It was hard enough being there, burying their best friend, their lover and who was supposed to be their life partner. Talking to anyone was an extra effort they couldn’t do. 

Only 6 days after her death, everyone was expected back at work. Y/N didn’t show up that first Monday. After the funeral no one heard from them, calls going to voicemail and texts staying on delivered. They had cut off all communication from their team, instead staying locked in their apartment, moving themselves from their bed, to the couch and back to the bed. They still weren’t eating, only drinking water to stay alive, not that they felt they had much to live for anymore. 

During that first week back the team had a case, heading to Portland quickly and leaving Penelope behind in her tech lab. Every day between 5 and 6 pm a quick knock would appear on their door, followed by the sweet voice of Penelope Garcia would flow through the wood, asking if they were alright but never receiving an answer. It wasn’t till Thursday night when she came by again that she became seriously concerned for Y/N’s health, spotting the full containers of food she had left them at the door 2 days prior. 

“Y/N? Please answer the door. I just want to help you.” Penelope called through the door, face painted with concern. After minutes of silence she called Derek who had just gotten back from their case, telling him to get over here asap. He was there within 5 minutes.

“Y/L/N!” He yelled through the wood. “If you don’t open the door I’m going to kick it in.” He waited, hoping it would open and their face would appear but when it didn’t, he had no choice but to get it open himself. He kicked the door open with force, walking strongly into their apartment, searching the kitchen and living room for them. Penelope ran into their bedroom, gasping loudly when she finally spotted them. They were passed out in the bed, 2 times smaller than when she last saw them and barely breathing. Derek rushed in, checking their pulse to find that it was thready and weak. He picked them up bridal style, carrying them out of the apartment and down to his car, Penelope close behind. 

When they woke up again, all they heard was beeping and hushed voices close by. They opened their eyes to a dark room with brighter lights coming from a hallway outside. 

“Wha- where-” They sat up quickly, heart racing at the unfamiliar environment, turning to their right when they felt a soft hand touch their own. Penelope’s sweet face had a beaming smile plastered but glassy, red eyes showed that she was crying previously. 

“You’re in the hospital.” She calmed them down, looking over to the other corner where Derek was standing against the wall. “We found you in your apartment, you-” Her voice cut off, tears fell down her face. 

“You were barely breathing Y/N. The doctors said you hadn’t eaten anything in over a week.” Derek moved to the end of the bed, staring Y/N deep in the eyes. They felt terrible, creating more stress and worry for the team after the past 2 weeks. 

“I’m sorry.” Y/N dropped their head in shame. 

“It’s okay.” Penelope placed a soft finger under their chin, making them look up at her. “We’re here to help you, you know that right?” She spoke softly. They nodded their head in response, travelling their eyes over to Derek. 

It was another week of rest at home, along with supplements to help Y/N get nutrients back into their body before they were allowed back at work. When they did return they were made to have a conversation with Strauss, discussing their prolonged absence before they were dismissed and cleared for the field.

“Y/L/N.” Hotch’s voice carried through the bullpen. Y/N looked up from their desk and towards his office. He was standing in the doorway, motioning his head and indicating for them to come up. They sighed, dropping their pen and standing up. They knew what it was about, Emily. The rest of the team had already had their conversations with Hotch, discussing their feelings and Y/N was the last to go in. They were trying to avoid it ever since returning to work, hiding away from his view everytime he walked past, but it was inevitable. They walked up the stairs and into his office, closing the door and meeting him on the couch. 

“Y/N.” They didn’t look at him, keeping their lips sealed shut. “Are you okay?” His voice was soft and genuine. Their focus remained trained on the floor, legs beginning to bounce from anxiety. They took a deep breath, trying to hold back tears and emotion. 

“I don’t want to do this.” They whispered, shaking their head. “I can’t.” They sighed. 

“Why not?” He sounded like a therapist, voice laced with concern for the agent. They bit their bottom lip, shaking their head again. More tears began to rise in their eyes. 

“Because-” Y/N turned their head to look at their boss. “Because if I do then it becomes real. I don’t want it to be real. I want her to walk through those doors like it was all some big joke.” They looked out at the glass doors. “But she won’t.” Their voice cracked, tears finally falling. “She’s gone, and I-I can’t do this without her Hotch.” They stood abruptly, pacing back and forth. “I’m not me. I’m not who I was. I-I’m broken.” They stopped, staring down at Hotch. 

“You’re not broken, Y/N.” He stood, meeting their eyes.

“Yes, I am. I haven’t cried, I-I can’t sleep, I couldn’t eat, I can’t breathe.” Y/N looked at him. 

“You’re not broken, you’re grieving.” He spoke calmly. “You’re allowed to grieve, Y/N.” He explained. 

“I don’t want to.” They shook their head again, hands clutching at their chest. “I held her in my arms, she was breathing.” They were back in the warehouse, holding Emily in their lap as she began to fade.  “I loved her so much.” They look up at their boss, their friend, and their heart shatters again. 

“I know, I know you did.” He stepped closer to them, wrapping his arms around their shoulders, enveloping them in a hug for the first time ever. They sobbed into his chest, not caring about the unprofessional nature of it, he wasn’t the big bad boss right now. He was their friend and he was comforting a friend in a difficult time. 

The sobs slowed and their breathing evened out, Hotch letting go of them.

“Thank you.” Y/N looked up at him, smiling slightly. “Would it be okay if I left a bit early today? There’s somewhere I need to be.” Hotch nodded in response, understanding their situation. 

When they left the office, they headed to the cemetery for the first time since the funeral. The walk from the car to her grave was tough, taking one step at a time. When they reached her headstone they sat on the grass in front, staring at her name engraved in stone. 

“Hey baby.” They smiled. “I’m sorry I haven’t been to visit yet, it’s been hard.” They sighed. Then they reached into their coat pocket, digging around for what had become their current habit. They pulled out a lighter and pack of cigarettes, lighting one in their mouth. They took a deep breath and puffed out the smoke, blowing it into the cool wind. “Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you about this.” They joked to her headstone. “Picked up a very old habit from high school, you’d probably hate it and throw it out if you could.” Their face dropped with their words. 

“I miss you.” They spoke again after a minute of silence. “Like a lot.” They took another hit of their cigarette. “It’s hard doing this without you. Life that is. I don’t even remember how I did it before I met you, but I guess I’m going to have to figure it out aren’t I?” They smiled painfully. They sat in silence at her grave for a while, waiting until their cigarette was nothing but a nub. This might have been the first time visiting her grave, but it wasn’t the last. 

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Stargirl | matildas x original character fic [part seventeen]

Words; 2.9k

Pairings; matildas team x astrid taylor (OC)

Warnings; alcohol and drinking, swearing

masterlist

So after spending the past three weeks and Christmas with their families, it was time for the Sweden Squad to jet off to Fiji for new years, basking in the sun before heading back to the Sweden cold.

They had all departed from their closest airports, figuring it was easier and cheaper than all congregating to one airport then taking another flight from there, so they were all arriving in Fiji at separate times. 

In Astrid fashion, the youngest member was the last to touchdown and make her way to the hotel, getting slightly lost in the airport after landing, trying to make her way to the taxi departures. It also didn’t help that her bag was the last to come out from the plane, waiting almost an hour for it to appear. It was honestly a miracle nothing else went wrong. 

“Maybe we should have taken a flight together, it might have been an easier experience on my end.” Astrid spoke as she appeared behind the other three girls who were waiting in the hotel lobby for her. 

“Took your sweet old time then.” Kyra laughed while getting up as Charli raced to hug Astrid, who then flipped the brunette off behind Charli’s back with a smile.

“You know what Kyra-.”  Astrid let go of Charli and began walking closer to Kyra. 

“No!” Courtney pointed between the two girls, stopping them in their tracks. “You two will not fight while we’re here, I’m not dealing with it, this is our relaxation time.” She looked sternly between the misfits who nodded at her, holding in their laughs that threatened to escape. 

“No fighting.” Kyra put her hand out to shake, Astrid stepping forward to connect her hand to hers. 

“No fighting.” Astrid repeated before pulling Kyra into a hug as well. 

“Alright, let's get you unloaded and off to the beach we go!” Charli had grabbed hold of the bags Astrid dropped during her arrival and signalled to the lifts, everyone else following behind as they headed to their shared room. 

The rest of their arrival day was spent on the beach, soaking in more sun and swimming in the beautiful water, enjoying their time together. And after a nice dinner, followed by a bit of partying, the four players eventually made it to bed and slept well into the next day. 

The group had decided not to plan anything for the 5 days they were there, wanting to just unwind and decide on the day if they wanted to do anything. But Astrid just wanted to swim like she had the whole time she was home. 

Growing up right on the water instilled this love and connection in her, wanting to spend as much time as she could before heading back to Sweden where the chance to swim was nonexistent unless it was in the form of an ice bath. 

This was something Astrid had been pondering for a little bit, whether Sweden really was the place for her. There was much to love; she was thriving at Hammarby, she was with her best friends everyday, she was experiencing life in a new place. But like she had felt when talking with Steph a few months ago, there was something missing but she couldn’t place it. 

Her deep thoughts were rudely interrupted when a pair of hands gripped her shoulders and disrupted her peaceful float in the pool. She let out a scream and quickly stood up in the water, turning around to face the culprit that had a wide grin spreading across her face. 

“KYRA! Really?!” Astrid pushed Kyra by the shoulders, earning a laugh from Kyra and holding back her own laugh. 

“What! I just wanna have some fun.” Kyra flashed her smile and it broke Astrid, the younger girl shaking her head and biting back a smile. “You wanna play mermaids?”

“Kyra Cooney-Cross, you are more of a child than Harper.” Astrid joked yet Kyra seemed to take it as a compliment, smiling even wider. “Come on then.” Astrid nodded her head to the deeper part of the pool, taking off under the water and Kyra excitingly swimming behind her. 

Charli and Courtney watched from their pool chairs, shaking their heads at the duo and their childish nature that seemed to match one another perfectly. Everyone was marvelled at what the pair seemed to be oblivious to but wouldn't dare bring it up, waiting for them to eventually figure it out. 

New Year's Eve. The most exciting and fun night of the year, especially when you were partying it up in Fiji with your best friends.

They spent the day lounging around once again before heading off to get ready for the hotel’s party that had been set up. Before the party had even started the girls were already tipsy and borderline drunk, taking their pre-drinks a little harder than normally, but they were on holidays so why not. 

As usual, Astrid was the last one to be ready, rushing the final steps of her makeup because Charli was hounding her to hurry up so they could get down to the party. They made it down in time, nearing 11pm and the party was definitely going strong. Everyone from the hotel had gathered outside near the pool area mingling with one another, celebrating the year ahead and most of all getting drunk as hell. 

Although they were professional athletes who were on pretty healthy regimes, no one was here to stop them from getting drunk and having fun like normal young people in their late teens and early 20s. So it went without saying that there were no limits to the amount of drinks they would consume tonight.

The four of them stayed together for the first part of the night, dancing near the DJ and scouring the people around them to hopefully find someone for a midnight kiss, but very clearly struggling as they all stood in a close circle downing drink after drink. Eventually they split up, hoping to find luck by not standing together and closing off everyone else around them.

Time had passed and suddenly it was 5 minutes till midnight; plenty of time to find a random stranger for a New Year’s kiss, right? Surely it can’t be that hard to find. But yet here Astrid was, eyeing off everyone and anyone that looked like they could be her type, but finding no one to do the job. 

3 minutes. She didn’t know where the other girls were and was getting slightly overwhelmed by the people around her, she ended up retreating out of the crowd outside and finding her way back inside the hotel. 

2 minutes. Astrid finds an empty hallway to find her breath, using the wall behind her to stabilise her as the alcohol makes her head spin. The music outside had decreased in volume largely, fading into the background of her ears, instead hearing the thump of her heartbeat in her chest. 

1 minute. She had zoned out while staring at the wall opposite her, the patterns on the wallpaper seemed to be moving or maybe it was her as she swayed on her feet, her body feeling the effects of the alcohol now that she had stopped. This is how Kyra found her, stumbling down the hallway herself when she spotted a familiar face. 

“Hey there.” Kyra’s slightly slurred words broke Astrid out of her trance and turned her head towards the midfielder, a smile instantly appearing on her lips. 

“Kyra!” Astrid’s voice was high pitched as she stepped towards Kyra with a wide smile, wrapping her hands around Kyra’s neck and pulling her into a hug. 

“I thought we lost you to someone in the crowd.” Kyra embraced the hug before pulling back, Astrid’s arms staying where they were and Kyra’s subconsciously falling to Astrid’s waist. And if there wasn’t plenty of liquid courage involved, both girls would have never found themselves so close so casually. 

“Too many people and I couldn’t find you.” Astrid playfully booped Kyra’s nose, both girls laughing before focusing in on the noise coming from outside. 

Seven…six…five…

“It’s almost midnight.” Kyra whispered, bringing Astrid’s attention back to her, the countdown fading to the background once again. 

“Yeah.” Astrid breathed out. Her heart began racing as her eyes fell back on Kyra’s. 

Four…

Three…

Two… 

One… 

The group outside cheered as the clock struck midnight, fireworks going off on the beach and yet Astrid and Kyra couldn’t be less interested. 

All they were interested in was the fact they were closer than before and now their lips were touching. 

Astrid’s hands had moved up from their place on Kyra’s neck, now resting on her cheeks as Kyra held her close by the waist. 

The kiss lasted 22 seconds before they both realised what was happening and they stepped apart. The noise outside returned to its full volume as they stepped back into reality, awkwardly looking away from each other. 

“Should we…” Astrid spoke as she pointed back to the glass doors that led back outside. 

“Uh… yeah… probs.” Kyra nodded and they walked back outside, Astrid once again feeling overwhelmed with the amount of people squished together. Kyra noticed her hesitation and silently placed her hand in Astrid’s, keeping her close as they weaved through the crowd together. Astrid followed, trying to ignore the feeling of having Kyra’s hand in hers and instead focusing on finding Courtney and Charli. 

“There you guys are!” Charli’s voice was what helped them locate the two girls, Astrid and Kyra turning around instantly, dropping their hands and stepping closer to them. “Where were you for the countdown?” Charli looked at Astrid, Courtney was now talking to Kyra separately. 

“Uh somewhere over the back.” She looked vaguely in that direction before Charli spoke again. 

“Did you get your midnight kiss?” Charli teased with a big smile. Astrid paused for a second before answering. 

“Uh yeah, I did.” Astrid scratched the back of her neck. “I think I’m gonna head up.” Astrid just wanted to get away and go to bed, her brain moving too fast for her to keep up with the thoughts. 

“You sure? You okay?” Charli instantly became worried but Astrid was quick to brush her off. 

“Yeah I think I had too much, stay safe okay.” Astrid gave her a hug before weaving herself back through the crowd and back to their room. 

“Where’s stargirl?” Courtney asked as Charli reappeared beside her, herself and Kyra noticing that Astrid was now missing. 

“To bed. Said she had too much to drink.” Charli shrugged her shoulders, Courtney nodded along before taking another sip of her own drink but Kyra was concerned and slightly disappointed but kept it to herself. 

The next day didn’t start till almost 1pm when they all finally rolled out of bed, slowly pushing back the curtains to let in some light but not enough to further increase their pounding headaches. They headed straight down to lunch, hoping to soak up any remaining alcohol and cure their growing hangovers. 

A few words were mumbled between one another but it seemed like more than a few were too much energy and they fell back into silence. To be honest, Astrid didn’t have much she wanted to talk about, especially because there wasn’t much of last night she remembered. Except for a very specific moment she was very scared to bring up. 

Kyra had easily returned to her normal self by dinner time, once again acting more like a child than an adult and attempting to encourage the other girls to join in. Astrid slowly joined in with her antics and jokes, watching Courtney and Charli shake their heads in disappointment but silently hiding their laughs behind stern faces. 

It seemed to Astrid like all had returned to normal within the group, Kyra obviously not wanting to bring it up or she in fact had no recollection of the kiss, which Astrid was grateful for. But there was a feeling in her stomach she couldn’t pinpoint when she thought about Kyra and the kiss, choosing to push it to the side and continue on with their holiday as normal. 

After one last day of fun in the sun, the group had returned to the airport, dreading heading back into a cold Swedish winter but excited to return to the sport they all love so much. The flight was long, way too long, they had kept themselves entertained individually, movies and naps taking up most of the time. But they finally landed back in Sweden, more than ready to fall in their beds and sleep, especially now that it was leaning towards 11pm. Charli had taken a separate flight from the other three like usual, wanting to land closer to her home and also stay away from Kyra and Astrid who were bound to fight over something and then make up after 5 minutes. 

An uber brought them home, dropping Astrid off first before heading up the road to Kyra and Courtney’s place, the younger girl bidding them goodnight as she lugged her suitcase up the front steps. Once inside Astrid locked the door, flicked on the lights and pulled her phone out faster than ever. 

“Pick up, pick up, pick up.” Astrid paced her small kitchen as she waited for the line to pick up, looking at the small mess in her living room that she had left behind months ago, before the last Matilda’s camp.  

“Hello?” A semi groggy voice answered from the other end and a sigh of relief left Astrid’s mouth. 

“Oh thank god.” Astrid was still walking back and forth, bringing her hands up to her mouth. 

“Astrid?” Cortnee recognised the voice and quickly acknowledged the slight panic in her voice. “What’s wrong?” 

“Something happened and I don’t know what to do.” She began letting out the thoughts that had been building over the past 3 days, running her hands through her hair. 

“What do you mean? Are you okay?” Cortnee was even more worried, sitting up a little more as concern raced through her.

“Yeah, no, I’m okay. I think.” Astrid shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut. 

“Just calm down and tell me what happened.” Cortnee was trying her best to calm Astrid from the other side of the phone, needing her to speak properly.

“I kissed Kyra. She kissed me. We kissed.” Astrid finally spat it out and bit her nails even more now, waiting almost 10 seconds for Cortnee to process and finally speak.

“WHAT?!” She tried not to shout and wake Charlotte up, crawling out of the bed beside her and moving outside her bedroom. “Are you serious?!” She whispered into the phone, a small smile donning her face.

“Yes.” The line went silent as she waited. “Cortnee, help!” She whined into the phone.

“It’s about fucking time.” Cortnee commented and Astrid was confused.

“What do you mean?” She paused her pacing. 

“You guys have been pining and obliviously flirting practically since the day you met, but especially over the last few months, I’m surprised it didn't happen earlier.” Cortnee tried not to let out a laugh.

“No we have not. It wasn’t even supposed to happen.” Astrid let out a frustrated sigh. 

“You didn’t do it on purpose?” Now Cortnee was the confused one.

“No… not really.” Astrid paused, letting out a breath. “It was on New Year's Eve. We were both really drunk and I don’t remember much, I don't even know if she remembers.” The familiar feeling returned to her stomach as they brought the moment up again.

“You haven't talked about it?” Cortnee asked her softly.

“No! She didn't say anything the next day or the rest of the trip, we just got back and I needed to call you.” She stopped her pacing. “I’m so sorry, did I wake you?” Astrid prayed she didn’t mess up the timezones and it wasn’t the middle of the night there.

“I was getting up in a few minutes anyway, it’s all good.” Cortnee began walking towards her kitchen and away from her bedroom door. 

“Okay.” Astrid let out a soft sigh.

“But you need to talk to her. She might remember it too but is scared you didn't or don’t want to remember.” Cortnee leant against her kitchen bench, hoping to speak some sense into Astrid. 

“But I'm scared. What if it was a mistake for her?” Astrid was confused with the feelings that were building inside her as she thought about it again.

“Was it a mistake to you?” Astrid paused at Cortnee’s words, letting her brain stop racing for a moment and focus on a single thought. 

“I don't know, I mean I don't regret it…. But I don't know what this would mean for us.” The pacing began again and her heartbeat began to quicken.  

“What do you want it to mean?” Cortnee softly asked.

“Stop asking me questions about things I don't know the answers to!” Astrid let out another frustrated sigh.

“You called me for advice!” Cortnee laughed at Astrid’s clear struggle with this issue.

“And I haven't gotten any yet.” Astrid remarked, holding back the small laugh she was harbouring. 

“What time is it there?” Cortnee asked her yet another question.

“Almost midnight.” Astrid looked at the clock on the stove.  

“You’re probably exhausted, get some sleep, when you get up, think about my questions and maybe, just maybe, you’re both ready to talk about it.” Cortnee reasoned, and finally Astrid was happy with a response. 

“Okay. Okay, I'll do that. Thank you, Viney.” Astrid smiled on her end. “Any time, star. Go to sleep.” Cortnee spoke one last time before hanging up, leaving the young forward standing alone in her own kitchen and thinking about Cortnee’s words. But she took her advice and headed off to shower and then crawled into bed, trying to ignore the growing thoughts that began racing around again.

to be continued...

Time Bomb | Criminal minds x fem!reader

Summary; Y/N’s mind is overworked and tired from case after case after case and the team begins to notice, prodding her until it gets too much. 

Parings; BAU team x BAU!reader, no romantic relationships mentioned. (she/her pronouns) 

Warnings; angst, mentions of chronic headaches/migraines, swearing, physical and emotional pain

Words; 1.7k

No one is permitted to steal, copy, or reblog my work as their own!!

Gif is not mine. @book-place​ 

It wasn’t unusual for Y/N to have a migraine, let alone a simple headache. She was diagnosed with atypical migraines when she was 15 and has been dealing with them since. But joining the  BAU 6 months ago really seemed to ramp things up for her. Since the day she left for that first case, the severity of her headaches increased, impacting her working abilities.  

She knew it wasn’t going to be an easy job, the commitments alone were tough but what was worse was trying to leave every painful detail of a case behind and move onto the next one, especially so quickly. She felt like she was doing work 24/7, whether she was on a plane flying across the country, stuck at her desk filing reports or thinking about cases when she got home. Everyone else on the team had been there for much longer than her so they had it down packed. But Y/N was still struggling, not that she would let anyone else figure that out. 

She became quite good at compartmentalising, hiding her emotions from her colleagues, family and friends. But all of this stress, tension and hurt came through in her migraines. Having suffered in pain for almost 10 years already, she was good at moving through the pain, pushing it aside, but lately it began bothering her more than ever, and the team began to notice. 

Derek was the first to pick up on her change in mood when she didn’t acknowledge his daily “Good Morning Firecracker”. Instead of her normal response, she flipped him the bird and kept walking to her desk in silence. He was quite insulted at her actions but took it as a bad morning. The other surrounding team members took note of this unusual behaviour from Y/N, all beginning to watch her closely. 

Reid noticed her mental distance during a case when it repeatedly took her 8 seconds longer than usual to answer a question or hear her name being called.

It was then Emily who tried to comfort her, but was brushed aside and ignored by Y/N. It happened yesterday, the team were in the office, working on files from the previous case and Emily noticed the younger team member had been silent all day. She watched with concern from her desk as Y/N held her head in her hands, rubbed her temples and took painkillers every few hours. As the day ended Emily approached Y/N, tapping her on the shoulder lightly to get her to raise her head off the desk. 

“What?” Y/N turned to Emily with tired eyes and an exhausted expression. 

“Sorry, I just wanted to check that you were okay? You’ve been quiet all day.” Emily removed her hand from Y/N’s shoulder. 

“I’m fine, Prentiss.” Y/N used Emily’s last name for the first time in months and it shocked everyone in the room. Y/N gathered her stuff and quickly left towards the elevators, brushing Emily’s shoulder on the way out. The whole team, including Rossi and Hotch who’d left their offices, stood in shock at the agent's actions. Something was definitely wrong. 

                                                    ~~~~~~

This morning Y/N slept in for the first time in weeks, and not on purpose. She had slept through three alarms and would officially be late for work, but it didn’t bother her. The pain pounding through her head was insufferable. It felt as if her skull was squishing her brain, waiting for it to explode. So she took her time getting ready, pausing every few minutes to sit and attempt to not pass out or throw up. Could she have just opted to take the day off? Yes. But she was too stubborn for that. 

She eventually made it to work, slowly making her way through the glass doors, now almost an hour late according to her watch. But when she finally looked up from the floor, no one was at their desks, or in the kitchen, or milling around the bullpen. It was silent. As much as she admired the peace and quiet, it was bugging her, where the hell was everyone else. Curiously she made her way up the stairs, peeking into Hotch and Rossi’s empty offices, then towards the conference room that suspiciously had the door closed and shades drawn.

She opened the door slowly, expecting to also find no one, but was wrong. The whole team was sitting at and standing around the table, previously talking lowly amongst themselves. 

“What the hell is going on? Why are you all in the fucking dark in silence? It’s weird.” Y/N’s voice caught the attention of her friends and boss, everyone staring at her with shock or concern plastered on their faces. 

“Come sit down Y/N.” Hotch finally spoke up, his hands crossed at his chest nodding his head to the empty chair in the centre of the table. 

“Fine.” Y/N snickered, moving slowly towards the chair. “What is this? An intervention?” Y/N laughed as she sat down in the chair, sliding down into a comfortable position. The room stayed silent. “Will someone please fucking say something!” She waved her hands in the air and looked to Emily, then Spencer then Derek. 

“Y/N.” Derek sighed, moving away from the window where he was previously leaning, catching the attention of Y/N. “We’ve all noticed some changes in your behaviour recently and we just wanted to see what was going on.” 

“Yeah.” Emily’s voice perked up from beside Y/N, moving to place her hand on top of the other agent’s. “We’re all worried for you, you haven’t been yourself. You get mad at the smallest of things, you’re constantly tired and falling asleep everywhere. Is there something you need to tell us? Are you-” Emily couldn’t even finish her sentence. 

Y/N shook her head in disbelief, they probably think I’m an alcoholic or drug user. Unbelievable. “Wow!” She laughed out, snatching her hand away from Emily’s. “Okay, so how about you guys take a guess at what’s wrong with me and I’ll tell you if you’re right.” Everyone’s jaw dropped at her outburst, not wanting to say anything to make it worse. “Hm. Go ahead. Or are you too scared?” Y/N stood up from her chair. 

“That’s enough Y/L/N.” Hotch sternly expressed to the agent, urging her to calm down. 

“No, Hotch. I’ve had enough! This is bullshit.” Y/N began walking towards the door behind her, only to be stopped by Derek. “Move.” She argued but he didn’t budge. “Stop it Derek, let me leave.” 

“No.” He uncrossed his arms, now softly holding her forearms. 

“Derek,” She was really frustrated now, tears began welling up in her eyes. “I swear to god.” She shook her head at him, her voice was breaking. The physical and emotional pain was getting too much. The pounding in her head  was so loud she thought her ear drums were going to burst. Derek saw her pain, swiftly moving to pull her into a tight hug, one that she didn’t reciprocate but also didn’t try to remove herself from. She broke down, for the first time in months she’d finally let go. She stood there, crying into Derek’s chest as he held her tight, protecting her, the room was quiet besides the sound of Y/N crying. 

This was the first time any of them had seen her cry in the 6 months of knowing her, not even after hard cases. They looked at each other, hearts breaking for their colleague and friend. After a moment she began to move and Derek’s grip on her loosened. She wiped her bare face and held her head down as she went to sit back down. “Talk to us honey.” JJ was now in the seat beside her, stroking her back lightly. 

She took a deep breath before she spoke again. “I have chronic migraines. I have since I was 15. And since working here, they’ve been worse than ever. Especially today.” She stopped, I sound so stupid, she thought to herself. Emily squeezed her shoulder encouraging her to keep going. Y/N sniffled, “I guess the heaviness of the cases, the workload, the stress has been getting to me a lot more recently. And don’t get me wrong, I love this job and you guys,” She lifted her head to look at her friends who were now all sitting or standing in front of her. “But sometimes it’s just too much and the emotional pain turns into physical which then turns into anger and a bad mood.” She looked back down at her hands, picking at her nails. 

“Well why didn’t you tell any of us you were struggling?” Rossi spoke kindly from across the table, meeting eyes with Y/N. 

Y/N’s mouth twists before speaking, trying to stop the tears. “I didn’t want to burden you. You guys have your own lives. And I’ve been dealing with it by myself for so long I thought I had it under control.” Her voice cracks at the end causing everyone’s hearts to shatter. How did they not see this earlier? They all thought to themselves. 

“Y/N, look at me.” Derek was now behind her, she looked up behind her shoulder. “You are not a burden. You are an incredible and important asset to this team and this family. That’s what we are.” He smiled down at her. 

“And that means that we’re always here for each other, good or bad.” Penelope’s sweet voice spoke next from further down the table. “Okay?” She asks when Y/N looks like she doesn’t believe her. 

She stayed silent for a while, thinking about their words. Slowly she began nodding her head, careful not to increase the pain. “Okay.” She smiled at her team. 

“How about you go sleep off the pain in my office for a bit?” Rossi offered, she almost rejected because she didn’t want to let them down but Rossi continued before she could open her mouth. “Just until we get a case, okay?” He hoped that would do the trick, and it did.

“Thank you.” She sniffled. “And I’m sorry for how rude I’ve been, it wasn’t intentional I promise.” She looked specifically at Emily and Derek who had received the brutal end of her outbursts. 

So now the team was fixed once again, now knowing how to help Y/N on her good and bad days.

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Stargirl | matildas x original character fic [part three]

Words; 2.1k

Pairings; matildas team x astrid taylor (OC)

Warnings; none (i don't think)

A/N; part three everyone. longest one so far, if they're too long please lmk and i can make them shorter if needed. hope you enjoy this one, favourite part so far.

masterlist

The day had finally arrived and Astrid didn’t even know that today could be the day she was waiting for. It was game day, 8th of April 2022, a friendly between Australia and New Zealand at the Queensland Country Bank Stadium in Townsville. 

The starting 11 walked out onto that pitch and the rest took their seats on the bench, anxious to see how the game would pan out today. It was in the 32nd minute that New Zealand scored their goal, officially taking the lead. After the halftime break and some substitutions the game began again, the Matildas managing to keep strong possession on the ball down their side. 

It was nearing the end of full time and New Zealand were still in the lead 1-0 and the girls were struggling to just get that ball in the net, the opposing defence strong as ever. Astrid was sitting on the bench, nervously watching the game ahead of her when Tony approached her. 

“Taylor.” Tony called out to her, Astrid instantly looking up at her coach. “Start warming up again, you’re subbing for Fowler.” Tony smiled watching the young player’s face light up and give him a firm nod. Charli gave her a shoulder shake and let out a small squeal as Astrid got up, moving over to the sidelines to warm up again. It was finally happening, she was finally making her debut for Australia. 

“Ready kid?” Tony caught Astrid’s attention as she ran back over to where the assistant ref was signalling for a substitution. And before she knew it, Mary was running over, engaging Astrid in a small hug before she ran on the pitch. The crowd cheered as the youngster came on with 13 minutes till full time, taking her position on the right side of the field. 

Only 3 minutes later Steph Catley is set to take a free kick. The players are all lined up, ready for the ball to fly towards them. Steph nods to the ref and uses her trusty left foot to shoot it towards the wall of players, angles the ball slightly further from Astrid who’s already running, Kerr goes for a header goal but it falls short. 

Astrid feels as if she's suddenly going in slow motion. She sees the ball leave Sam's head and she runs faster, lifting up her right leg to catch it and knock it towards the goal. And as if the universe was on her side, the goalie had run slightly away from Astrid's position of the goal, giving her the perfect opportunity to sink it into the top left corner of the net. 

As they see it ripple the crowd roars with cheers, every player on the bench rising to their feet in celebration, Tony making a run for the edge of the technical area in celebration. Astrid stood still with her mouth agape, shocked as to what had just happened. It wasn’t till Foord came running to her, gripping her body in celebration that she could breathe again, turning to face Caitlin as a wide smile grew on both of their faces. The rest of the team on the field came charging down on the pitch to jump all over the young player, screaming and yelling their excitement. 

GOOOAAALLL! And it’s a magnificent one to equalise the Matildas with New Zealand by none other than number 3, Astrid Taylor in the 80th minute! This is her first ever Matilda's goal and what a shot it was by the 17 year old, with only being on the pitch for less than 5 minutes AND in her international debut! It’s unbelievable. 

At that moment Astrid almost started crying. 17 years old, finally playing her first game for her country and a game changing goal 10 minutes from full time in front of a massive crowd. Her teammates were beyond proud of her, not only for her first goal but for bringing them to an equaliser after a long and tough game. 

Full time ended and still at a tie, the team patiently waited to see how many extra minutes were given to hopefully score once more and take the win. An additional 5 minutes is shown after Cortnee subs Hayley, Astrid giving her a high five and focus is pulled back to the game. Astrid bounces on her feet, body now pumping with adrenaline to take this home. 

And with the magic right boot of Emily Van Egmond the Matildas gained a goal in the 93rd minute, bringing them in front of New Zealand. The stadium erupts once more after the ball ripples the net, Emily running straight for Polkinghorne as the rest of the team follows suit, celebrating with her before returning to their places, focusing on the last 30 seconds of time. 

Australia wins a corner and Steph runs to take it, officially over stoppage time when she shoots it over to the goal, it bounces backwards off Alanna’s head and by miracle Sam Kerr knocks it over the players and past the white line. 

Sam runs straight to Steph with her arms outstretched, catching her up high as they meet, everyone else following behind with outcries of excitement, jumping on top of each other in celebration. The time is still running and the players are instructed to return to their positions. The ball is played and all though it gets shot down to Lydia in the Aus goal, no one runs to defend, the final whistle blowing before there's even a chance it could go in. 

They’ve done it, they've won. 3-1 over New Zealand and Astrid could not be more ecstatic to have been a help in that. The Townsville crowd erupt in cheers in favour of the Matildas and they all release massive smiles before they go off and shake hands with their own players and those on the New Zealand team. The players on the sideline slowly make their way onto the field, Charli running directly to Astrid, engulfing her close friend in a tight embrace, spinning her around on the field. 

“YOUR DEBUT AND A GOAL?! I’M SO PROUD.” Charli yelled over the loud stadium music. Giving a final squeeze they let go and Charli rests an arm over Astrid's shoulder, pulling her into her side, incredibly proud of her friend as they walk the pitch to meet their teammates. So far this was the best day of Astrid’s life and one she would remember for the rest of her life. Tony reached the pair on the pitch and held Astrid’s hands. 

“Congratulations, I’m very proud, Astrid.” Tony nodded his head at the young player as she looked at him.

“Thank you Tony.” Was all Astrid could get out without her voice cracking, trying to not cry tears of happiness. Kyra and Cortnee ran to hug her first, squeezing her tight with pride. As they began to do their lap of the pitch, the rest of the team embraced Astrid, congratulating her, saying how proud they were, and grateful she brought them to that equaliser. 

Eventually a presenter called out to Astrid and she ran over to them, fixing her hair as best as she could and removing some sweat from her face. 

“Astrid, do you mind doing a small post-match interview?” The lady from Channel 10 asked. 

“Yeah, yeah. Of course.” Astrid nodded and straightened out her shirt. 

“Great.” The presenter waited for the go ahead before talking again. “We’ve got  Astrid Taylor here, only 17 years old and scoring her first Matildas goal in her first appearance, and an impressive one at that. Astrid, congratulations and how do you feel?” She pointed the mic to Astrid. 

“Oh thank you. Ah yeah. I don’t even really believe it myself. I mean I wasn’t really expecting to be going on at any stage and making my debut tonight, but Tony told me to get ready and then it happened.” Astrid laughed as she talked. 

“I mean it was quite impressive. Only being on for 3 minutes before you were able to sneak it in. What was happening in that moment for you?” The reporter asked and Astrid swallowed. 

“Yeah it was crazy. It was Steph’s kick and I saw it go to Sam and I just began running in that direction, and as it bounced off her head, I caught it and just shot it in the direction of the goal and hoped for the best. I guess it was my luck that Esson was more focused on Sam than me!” Astrid made everyone around her laugh, heart still beating fast with adrenaline and nerves from being on camera. “I’m also just really happy we got the win, Emily and Sam helping us turn the game around so late.” 

“Absolutely incredible. And so is your score sheet with your club Sydney FC. I mean you only joined back in November and you have scored at least 16 goals with them.” 

“Oh thank you. Yeah that club is incredible and I’m so glad I’ve got Viney there with me to get those with.” Astrid smiled brightly. 

“Well again congratulations and thank you. Enjoy the celebrations!” She reached out to shake Astrids hand as she muttered a small ‘thank you’ before walking back to the last lingering teammates that gathered near the tunnel, watching her proudly. 

The bus ride back to the hotel was as expected, loud and full of excitement, obviously preparing to scream their winning chant. 

“BUILDING UP SUSPENSE, BUILDING UP SUSPENSE, BUILDING UP SUSPENSE, BUILDING UP SUSPENSE, BUILDING UP SUSPENSE. WOOOOOOO.” The team began to chat, banging on seats and windows as Lydia stood up to lead them. 

“IT’S A GRAND OLD TEAM TO PLAY FOR, AND IT’S A GRAND OLD TEAM TO SEE, AND IF YOU KNOW THE HISTORY, IT’S GONNA MAKE YOUR HEART GO WOAH. WE DON’T CARE WHAT THE OTHER TEAMS SAY, WHAT THE HELL DO WE CARE.” The noise from the bus was getting louder and louder as all players and staff members joined in. “FOR WE ONLY KNOW THERE’S GOING TO BE A SHOW AND THE AUSSIES WILL BE THERE.” 

“WAS IT ONE?” Lydia yelled, awaiting the response. 

“NO.”

WAS IT TWO?”

“NO”

“WAS IT THREE?” 

“YES.” Claps and cheers ran through the bus. 

“HERE WE GO, HERE WE GO, HERE WE GO, HERE WE GO, HERE WE GO, HERE WE GO, HERE WE GO, HERE WE GO, HERE WE GO, HERE WE GO, HERE WE GO, WOOOOOO.” Everyone cheered in celebration, clapping loudly, Kyra rubbing Astrid’s hair from her seat next to the other girl. A large smile erupted on the young girls’ face, still in disbelief of what just happened. 

After dinner the room quieted down, everyone paying attention to their captain at the front of the room. 

“Um, obviously a very special game today, glad we got the win today and an incredible performance. Astrid,” Sam directed her eyes to the young girl sat next to Charli and Kyra. “You have worked so hard these past few months and I think I speak on the behalf of all of us when I say we’re so proud. You’ve really proven yourself and today a miracle really happened. Not only your first cap but your first goal in 3 minutes of being on the pitch! I mean I think that might be the most impressive debut in Matildas history.” The room erupted in cheers and claps, Astrid shook her head and covered her face with her hands. 

“Yeah Stargirl!” A shout comes loudly from Charli and the room falls to laughter. 

“So congrats and we’re so happy to have you as part of this team and family.” Sam finished, Charli and Kyra pushing Astrid to get up and walk to the front of the dining room. The girls clapped and cheered for her, a smile on her face as she approached Sam. 

“Thank you.” Astrid mumbled as they hugged, Sam patting her back with a final squeeze, letting go to hand her the official Matildas cap. Astrid looked at it for a second before turning around to face the team, her team. “Um, thank you everyone for making this day so special. A little bit lost for words right now,” She let out a small laugh. “Obviously I can’t take all the credit for the goal, Steph and Sam were the ones who even made it possible, I was just there to help you out. Getting to make my debut today with this group of girls just makes it so special and I wouldn’t have been able to do it without the inspiration of every one of you. Thank you for all the support and I love you all. Thanks.” The room clapped again, Astrid moving over to the side for a photo with her cap. 

Sam then made her speech for Caitlin who played her 100th cap, reminiscing on their journey together before presenting her with her shirt, while also giving a cheer to Katrina who had returned to her first game tonight after having Harper. The night ended with team celebrations before heading to bed to recover from a big game. 

to be continued...

A/N; also i know this may seem a bit unrealistic but we're in a fake world with a fake character who's just really good at football so idc. xx

stina i love you, you have cured me 🥰🤍❤️

really hoping they can cure my sickness with a win

🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

Stargirl | matildas x original character fic [part fourteen]

Words; 2.6k

Pairings; matildas team x astrid taylor (OC)

Warnings; none

A/N; Putting up this fic again on here instead of just on wattpad so get ready for 5 chapters in a row uploaded. This story is so special to me and a real escape from the reality of juggling three jobs and I hope you all enjoy it. Love ya x

masterlist

A few hours later the team were boarding a plane and heading straight to Denmark ahead of their next game. A lot of the girls were tired from the match and the past few days of travelling, except those younger players like Astrid, Charli, Kyra and Courtney who were still somehow on a high. They sat in two rows with Charli and Courtney behind Astrid and Kyra so that they could talk to one another between the seats. 

The chatter between them didn’t last long though as exhaustion finally caught up to the main culprit, Astrid, as she found her head inching closer and closer to Kyra’s shoulder. Kyra was quick to welcome the action and soon found herself falling asleep alongside her for the remainder of the short flight. 

As the flight came to an end, Charli called upon the older girls who were slowly getting up from their seats to witness the sleeping pair. They of course were taking photos and videos of them, admiring their cute positioning, before Steph came forward and attempted to wake them up. Steph was gentle with her approach, tapping on both of their shoulders before calling out to them. 

“Kyra, Astrid, time to get up guys.” Steph spoke softly, letting out a giggle when Astrid only began to nuzzle herself further in Kyra and stayed asleep. Steph tried once more but no luck as the duo didn’t respond again. 

“Okay, my turn.” Mackenzie had gotten up from her seat and gently pushed Steph aside. She had a smirk on her face as she approached the duo, stepping into Charli and Courtney’s now empty row, placing both hands on the tops of their seats from behind.

“Wake up!” The goalkeeper almost screamed as she violently shook their seats, instantly scaring Kyra and Astrid awake at the intense motion. They both let out a small scream as they woke up, gripping onto their seats with racing hearts. The shaking stopped almost instantly as Macca doubled over in laughter at their reactions, the remaining team members also laughing as they watched on. 

Astrid panted while looking around for the culprit and when she spotted Mackenzie almost on the floor whilst laughing, it took everything for her to not jump straight over Kyra and tackle her. But Mackenzie was running for her life down the aisle, getting off the plane fast and avoiding Astrid’s rage. 

“I’m going to kill her.” Astrid muttered to herself while collecting her bags from under the seat, Kyra snickering at her and moving around in silence. 

“Maybe tomorrow after you’ve slept it off.” Steph’s voice came from just ahead, the last one waiting for them to get off the plane. “Let’s go, you two.” She began walking to the exit, Kyra and Astrid walking behind her while yawning. 

The high from winning was back at breakfast the next day after a night of rest, and Astrid was warmly welcomed into the dining room when she finally made her way down. She tried to just collect her breakfast and sit down at the table she normally did but was interrupted by multiple pats on her back or head and everyone continuing to congratulate her on her hat trick yesterday. She made her truce with Mackenzie but still pondered silently on ways to get her back when she least expects it. 

She finally made it to her seat between Charli and Kyra, immediately digging into the food she had been thinking about since she woke up. Astrid managed to eat her breakfast without interruptions, only talking occasionally with the girls at her table before cleaning up her spot and returning to her room. 

She was rummaging through her bags for her training kit when her phone began to vibrate. Reaching in her hoodie pocket to find her mum’s contact lighting up the screen. She moved to sit on her bed before answering the facetime.

“Hi mum!” Astrid smiled at her through the screen. 

“Oh hi my darling. Have I woken you? Is it still too early there?” Joanna asked, worrying she had yet again messed up the time zones. 

“No, I just got back from breakfast.” Astrid reassured her. 

“Oh good. I’m sorry I didn’t call last night after the game, but it was so late here and when we woke up it was the middle of the night for you and…” Joanna rambled. 

“Mum, it’s fine. I knew you would have called sometime today. Besides,we were on the plane within a few hours anyway.” Astrid sat up against the headboard, watching her mother’s face visibly soften at the sight of her daughter. “What did you think of the game?” Astrid always valued her parents' opinion of her performances, knowing their kind words would diminish any anxiety or worry in herself. 

“Oh Astrid!” Joanna exclaimed, Astrid giggling at her reaction. “We have never been so proud of you! You were absolutely incredible my darling.” Joanna beamed for her daughter and her accomplishments. “You should have seen your dad and I last night, on the edge of our seats and off our bums within seconds of all your goals!” They both laughed on either end of the phone.

“I can imagine.” Astrid laughed once more, imagining just what she had described. “Thanks mum.” Her voice fell quieter with a small smile on her face. 

“Dad at work?” She asked. 

“He is, but he promised he would call later when he gets home and hopefully you're not training or anything by then.” Joanna explained and Astrid nodded from her end. 

“Okay, I’ll let him know when I’m finished up for today.” Astrid smiled softly. “I-” She was cut off by the door opening, turning her head to see who it was. 

“Okay, it’s been more than 10 minutes since you said you were getting changed and-” Kyra stormed playfully into the room, stopping when she saw Astrid sitting on the bed, looking up at her and still not dressed in her training gear.

“Say hi to mum while I finish getting ready.” Astrid simply turned the phone in Kyra’s direction, Joanna waving with a smile through the screen. 

“Joanna! How are you?” Kyra snatched the phone and waved excitedly at the woman, Astrid finding her clothes behind her suitcase and heading off to the bathroom to change. 

Through the closed door, Astrid could hear Kyra and Joanna talking to one another about the game and other random things before she exited and silently watched from the doorway. Kyra and Joanna laughed with each other over the phone, Astrid’s heart warming at the interaction. She checked her watch and realised it really was time for them to get going.

“I thought you said I was going to be the one to make us late, now it looks like it’ll be you.” Astrid walked over to sit beside Kyra, falling back into the frame. 

“Well how could I deny a chat with the one and only Joanna Taylor.” Kyra scoffed, turning to smile at Astrid. “But if you insist we must go…” She shrugged her shoulders with a pout. 

“Well, although I don’t mind our reputation of being late,” Astrid raised her eyebrows at Kyra. “I’d rather not prove the girls right and let them go on about it all session for once.” She argued with Kyra who seemed to agree with a slight nod. “Sorry mum, but we do have to go now.” Astrid took her phone back from Kyra’s hands.

“I’ll talk to you later then darling. You girls have a good day and say hi to Charli and Courtney for me please?” Joanna smiled at her daughter and her best friend who now wrapped her arms around Astrid’s neck.

“We will. I love you.” Astrid blew a kiss through the screen, Joanna catching it and placing it on her cheek. 

“I love you too.” They all waved at each other before hanging up. 

“Get off me you monkey!” Astrid laughed as she tried to peel the arms off her but Kyra persisted, gripping tighter while laughing with her. “I’m serious!” Astrid tried to get up off the bed. 

“Carry me.” Kyra stood with Astrid who paused for a second before bending down and waiting for Kyra's legs. 

“You’re so annoying.” Astrid grunted as Kyra was now fully on her back, holding arms tight around her legs to hold her up. “At least open the doors for us then.” Astrid turned her head to look up at her, Kyra nodding in response, reaching forward to pull the front door open and making sure it fell shut as they left. 

They had successfully made it down to the lobby with Kyra still on Astrid’s back, meeting the team who were waiting for them like always. Charli laughed as she saw Astrid beginning to struggle under the weight of Kyra, snapping a quick photo for later purposes. 

“Okay Kyra, seriously get off me or we’re both going down together.” Astrid panted from underneath the older girl. 

“Fine.” Kyra huffed before jumping down and Astrid let out a sigh of relief as she stood up straight and cracked her back. 

“Thank you.” Astrid smiled at her before they both turned their head towards someone clapping their hands at them. 

“You two! Let’s go!” Katrina was the last one standing at the entrance, everyone else now outside waiting on the bus for them.

“Coming mum!” Kyra and Astrid sang out in sync, laughing as they ran to the older woman who was shaking her head and walking out the door. 

Successfully the team made it to their recovery session being held at the Viborg Stadium ahead of their next match, everyone piling inside their gym to complete their recovery individually. 

Astrid spent the whole session singing and dancing more than actually recovering, annoying everyone with her karaoke of Hannah Montana and Taylor Swift, before the coaches told her to get on with her workout or she was in trouble.

Recovery ended the way it always did, with the ice baths/pools. And of course like always Astrid was one of the first in there, teasing everyone who took their time and didn’t embrace the cold like she did. But it came to an end finally and they were all encouraged to go enjoy their free time before the next two days of training ahead of the match against Denmark.

“Who’s up for exploring the city?” Teagan posed the question to everyone once they had returned to the hotel and now congregated in the common room, most people nodding or humming in agreement. Astrid and Kyra looked at each other with the same thought on their minds. 

“Astrid? Kyra?” Charli caught the attention of the girls. “You guys coming?” She asked and they looked at each other once more, silently communicating and Charli stood there waiting. 

“I think we’re going to head off on our own.” Astrid finally spoke. “Kyra owes me lunch.” Kyra nodded at Astrid’s statement, watching Charli’s face fall even further into confusion. 

“I lost a bet, so now I buy her lunch.” Kyra simply stated and stood up waiting for Astrid to follow her. Astrid nodded and stood next to Kyra.

“Alright, guess I’ll see you two later then.” Charli shook herself back to reality and stared at the two people who were famous for bickering, waiting to willingly hang out with one another. “Be safe.” She added as they left. 

“We will.” They called out in sync as they left the hotel, everyone in the room watching on in slight confusion. 

“That was weird right?” Charli spoke into the room, looking at everyone’s faces. 

“Very.” “Yes.” “Let’s hope they don’t kill each other.” Different voices rang out before everyone began laughing and preparing to explore on their own accord as a team. 

The pair walked around the streets close to the hotel for a while, trying to spot a quiet yet decent looking restaurant. 

“How about this one?” Kyra pointed up at the sign, attempting to read the Danish but because she didn’t know any part of the language it didn’t really work. Astrid let out a small laugh and pushed Kyra closer to the entrance. “This one it is then.” She murmured as she pushed the door open for the both of them. 

“Oh thank god.” Astrid silently let out as they opened the menus once they found a table, grateful to find English translations underneath the Danish food listings. 

A server came over to the pair and once he realised they couldn’t understand him, he simply asked them to point out the items they wanted and he scribbled them down quickly. Astrid and Kyra were slightly embarrassed at the situation but quickly began laughing over it. 

They talked on and off while eating about random things that were going on and checking in on one another's families. But they were already around each other so much they didn’t need to constantly fill the silence. 

Kyra stuck to her promise and paid for the whole lunch, both of them thanking the staff before heading out of the restaurant and back onto the streets of Denmark. 

“Oh thank god!” A loud voice came from behind Kyra and Astrid, a familiar pair of arms wrapping around both of their shoulders and slotting themself between them. 

“Jesus Charli.” Astrid sighed, turning her head towards the blonde. “What are you going on about?” Astrid sent a quizzed look to Charli and paused the three of them on the street. 

“You guys spent over an hour together alone and didn’t kill each other.” Charli exaggerated, Kyra and Astrid both rolled their eyes at her comment. “It’s a miracle!” She laughed and removed herself from both girls. 

“Leave em alone Charli.” Mini’s voice piped up from behind them, all three turning to see Harper sitting on her hip and the rest of the team walking close behind them. 

“Harps!” Astrid took long strides to reach them, Harper’s little face lighting up at the sight of Astrid, almost jumping out of her mothers arms and into Astrid’s open ones. 

“Weeee!” Harper squealed and giggled as Astrid carefully swung her around in the air before placing her on her hip, Harper instantly snuggling up against the youngest Matilda. The team began their walk back to the hotel after finding Kyra and Astrid, all feeling a little tired after the late night flight and early morning recovery.

A lot of the team chose to hang out together in the main conference room of the hotel, now that it had become their designated hang out room during free time, either just chilling on their phones or playing games with each other. 

Though Astrid, kyra, Charli and Teagan had taken the task of entertaining Harper so that Mini could take a nap. It was a fun yet hard task to complete, Harper often had a lot of energy and an inability to stick with one activity for too long. 

So like always they started with physical games to tire her out, chasing her around and losing their own energy in the process. Then they moved onto any toys mini had left with them, spending their time playing barbies or dolls and then finally putting on a disney movie they would all enjoy. 

So that's how mini found them all after an hour, fast asleep on couches and bean bags with Inside Out playing over Charli’s laptop, and Harper laying over Astrid’s chest. She thought there was no harm done so she left them there, reminding herself to come back and retrieve them all before dinner. 

to be continued...

A life for a life |Derek Morgan x platonic!reader

Summary; while chasing down an unsub, reader has to make a haste decision on whether to take the kill shot, making it their first. 

Pairings; derek morgan x platonic!reader, bau team x platonic!reader (gender neutral, no direct pronouns used)

Warnings; guns used, blood, typical cm plot things, fluff, angst and sadness wrapped into one.

Words; 1.2k

Not my gif; @just-my-fandom​

Once the team had figured out who the unsub was, they split up between his home and work addresses, racing against the clock towards each. Morgan, Spencer and yourself were currently heading to his house with Garcia on the phone still spitting out random facts about him.

 The SUV pulled up outside the small house, the three of you jumping out straight away. 

“Reid, you take the back entrance.” Morgan instructed, Spencer running around the side of the house instantly. “You take the kitchen entrance and I’ll take the front.” You nodded at him, giving him a fist bump before taking off, it was your way of saying “be safe” without words. 

You stayed quiet and low as you travelled around the west side, looking through the windows for any sign of the unsub. 

“I got him. He’s in the living room with Carrie.” You whispered into your radio, spotting him and the missing girl through the side window. You continue until you get to the door. Derek’s loud voice can be heard throughout the whole house. 

“Samuel Rogers! Drop the weapon and let Carrie go!” 

You twist the handle of the door slowly, attempting not to make any noise as you open it easily, stepping inside the house quietly. You had your gun raised, checking each corner before you found yourself at the edge of the kitchen and the living room. Derek was directly in front of the unsub, gun trained at him as best as he could with the unsub moving back and forth, arms tight around Carrie’s neck. Spencer was only 2 feet away from you, standing between the dining and living room, doing the same as you, standing silently behind them in case things went south. 

Derek was talking to him, trying to calm him down and encouraging him to let her go but he wasn't budging. “Give it up man, let her go. Your plan didn’t work.” Morgan kept saying to him. Your gun was pointed directly at him from behind, Samuel being unaware of the two agents currently behind him. 

“SHUT UP!” Samuel yelled, squeezing Carrie tighter in his arms, pointing his gun directly at Derek’s chest. 

Adrenaline was pumping through your veins, heartbeat pounding in your ears as you stood closer to an unsub than you ever have before. Your finger was pressing on the trigger and within seconds a shot was fired, your arm jolting back as your own gun fired. Your eyes were squinted shut, not seeing directly where it was fired. 

You opened your eyes seconds later, spotting Spencer moving closer to Samuel’s body checking for a pulse, Derek reaching forward to move Carrie out of the way. Your eyes then travelled to the lifeless body on the ground, spotting the bloody hole in his forehead. Your breath left your chest, arms still raised with your gun in your hands.

This isn’t the first time you’ve shot someone while being in the FBI, normally opting for the shoulder or the thigh, pretty much just knocking them down. But this was your first kill. The first time your shot has killed someone else. You were frozen in your spot, watching the scene unfold before you as the rest of your team showed up, moving Carrie out to an ambulance and covering Samuel’s body with a white sheet.

A soft hand on your shoulder finally broke you from your trance, you blinked and the air finally returned to your lungs. 

“Y/N.” Derek called out softly from beside your ear. He reached out and placed his hand on your extended arms, lowering them and removing your gun from shaking hands. “It’s okay.” He whispered and your head dropped, playing back the same moment over and over again. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders and walked you out of your head, guiding you to stand next to one of the SUV’s. 

You were in a state of shock, staring down at the pavement while people walked past you, sirens rang and lights flashed in the street, neighbours coming out of their houses to look at the spectacle happening in their street. 

“Hey.” Derek appeared in front of you again. “You okay?” His voice was soft and calming. You kept your head down. 

“I- I’ve never killed anyone before. I didn’t want it to end like that.” You shook your head, eventually meeting his soft eyes with your sad ones. 

“I know. I know, kid.” He consoled you. “I also know that you saved my life.” He held your shoulder again, pulling you closer to him. 

“Well yeah but-” You looked down again, sighing deeply. 

“No buts. Look at me.” He instructed but you didn’t. He used his hand to grab your cheek softly, pulling you up to meet his eyes again. “You did what you had to. Okay?” He was telling the truth but there was part of you that knew it could’ve ended differently and he sensed this. “Okay?” He asked again. 

“Okay.” You sighed, nodding your head. 

“Come here.” He pulled you into a soft hug, holding your head against his chest as you wrapped your arms up under his shoulders. You didn’t care if people or your team saw you hugging in the field, they knew how close you guys were. He was like your big brother and your best friend rolled into one. He was close to Spencer in a similar way, everyone including yourself knew that. But he was the first to take you under his wing when you joined the team not that long ago, finding comfort in you and your presence; you felt the exact same. 

“Thank you Morgan.” You pulled back from the hug, smiling softly up at him. 

“Anytime Y/L/N.” He ruffled your hair like he always did. “Let’s go get a drink.” He laughed slightly, brightening the mood. You nodded, never passing up the chance to hang out with your team in a fun setting. 

You had all made your way back to the hotel you were staying at, taking some time to get yourselves ready before heading down to the hotel bar. You were the last to arrive, taking a little extra time in the shower to wash the day off. As you walked down the stairs into the bar, the whole team turned to look at you, cheering lightly as they said hello. Your face changed quickly from happy to confused. You walked closer to them, standing next to Derek. 

“What’s going on?” You looked at him, whispering through a smile. His own smile grew larger as he handed you your favourite drink. 

“To Y/N,” Everyone raised their glasses. “For saving my life today.” He continued and wrapped his empty arm around your shoulder. Everyone clinked their glasses together, making sure to smile and make eye contact with you. “Thank you, I’m proud of you.” Derek whispered in your ear, placing a kiss on your temple as the rest of your team talked amongst themselves again. 

The rest of the night was spent talking,laughing and drinking with your newfound family. It was a tough case, especially for you and tonight was exactly what you needed.