My Favorite Sad Little Green Man

htps://www.blutonews.org/article/21

Bluto Gave A Terrible Handjob To The Somebody With a Long Weird Penis and They Jizzed Anyways

Bluto was always bad at handjobs but he loved doing them, so he was ecstatic when his newest hookup let him touch their weener! he tugged and pulled and twisted it painfully, this gave the long weird penis friction burn but they blasted gunk anyways making Bluto squeal and giggle with joy.

Kris in the 2000s emo art style

i should probably actually do something with this blog huh

When I was little I wanted to be Italian REALLT badly bc I loved the movie cars and specifically had a crush on this fucking THING

Which doesn’t speak English at all, all it’s line are in Italian and it’s name is GUIDO. And everyone knew I was obsessed with Italy in elementary school but they didn’t know why bc I, even as a young autistic child, had the sense to know this was a rightfully so, highly mockable thing. So I would read about cars on IMDB and then one day someone posted a crackfic on the message boards there and it was about this guy getting drunk and beating his wife, and it snapped me out of my fugue long enough to realize how absurd wanting to be Italian was, but then it made me cry really hard and my parents were like ‘hey what the fuck’ and I didn’t have the chutzpah to admit anything so I told them I saw a naked lady online and then they went into the computer and found all the weird south park midi songs I downloaded on lime wire and I thought they were literally going to kill me for about two weeks.

together they form one (1) brain cell

LAST ONE ALIVE LOCK THE DOOR

Day 8 (The No Bone Zone is an exhibit at the Florida Aquarium where you can touch various anemone, sea cucumbers, etc)

and they had a lovely night *:･ﾟ✧

A comic about the Dark World that makes you Old

i don’t think mordecai and rigby were ever gay for each other but i do think many times rigby would be like dude if i was a girl would you want to fuck me and mordecai is like dude that’s weird. no. and rigby is all bent out of shape about it and in the middle of the night when they’re both trying to sleep he’s like why wouldn’t you fuck me if i was a girl. i’m cute right? or am i ugly and that’s why i’m single… and mordecai is like fine whatever i’d fuck girl you. stop bringing it up now. & the next day rigby is like fuck off muscle man i’m not ugly mordecai said he’d fuck girl me & then a portal opens to an alternate dimension where they’re genderbent like that adventure time episode and the voice of god is like mordecai you must make good on your word. fuck girl rigby.