LET’S HAVE A CONCLAVE

Oh my gosh!! This is stunning! Your style fits these two so well and I love how you illustrated them interacting!

They way Jonah is slightly bending down because of his height and looking unbearably smug + fond-- and the annoyed expression on Jon's face!!! Also his braid!!! The character designs and outfits you gave them are just so fantastic and they really bring these two to life! Also the texturing and the background??? Phenomenal, show-stopping, 10/10!

I'm loosing my mind. Thank you so, so much for bringing these two to life- your art is incredibly fantastic oh my gosh

A piece of art for A Little Game of Cat and Mouse by @paptato on ao3 :’))

I just know these guys will be friends soon maybe hopefully??

❗️ 😈 💀 📉 💩 🥺 🦀 ❗️

- the evil wizard

Chapters: 6/? Fandom: The Magnus Archives (Podcast) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Jonah Magnus/Jonathan Sims, Elias Bouchard/Jonathan Sims Characters: Jonathan Sims, Jonah Magnus, Elias Bouchard | Jonah Magnus, Robert Smirke, Mordechai Lukas, Annabelle Cane, Barnabas Bennett Additional Tags: (past) Jonathan Sims/Martin Blackwood, Time Travel, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Season 4 and Season 5 spoilers, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Pre complete bastardman Jonah Magnus but not really, Alternate Universe - Historical, Jonathan Sims Needs a Hug, Archivist Jonathan Sims, Period Typical Attitudes, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Asexual Jonathan “Jon” Sims | The Archivist, A ridiculous amount of spiders, Dear god theyre getting everywhere Summary:

“Jonah Magnus.” The cloudy silhouette snarled as it’s hand clamped tightly around Jonah’s ascot. That was indeed his name, but Jonah couldn’t begin to fathom what he did to have it spat out with such hatred.

But nonetheless, Jonah was a gentleman and he would kindly address the angry figure as politely as possible, “Yes, and you are?”

“What?” The form spluttered as it slowly came into focus. Ah, yes. That probably wasn’t the proper response to being held at gunpoint by a random stranger. Must have been the blow to his head.

(Or in which Jonathan Sims goes back in time and tries to pull a Terminator, but fails and Jonah Magnus finds a new mystery to solve.)

(@paptato)

A Mouthwashing (and How Fish is Made) fansong, unfortunately from Jimmy’s POV mostly, sorry. 🐴 Music and lyrics by me, PhemieC

NOTE: this is my first fansong in five years, and sad to say but my voice has been decimated by illness in the last few years, so please don’t go into this expecting it to sound the same as my old stuff.

That being said, I have released an instrumental version, and I would LOVE to hear covers from other vocalists! Feel free to post and sell if you make a cover as well. <3

LYRICS UNDER CUT

[verse 1] Momma bird sleeping and her nest is empty Pretty and clean I feel the crease of envy Cutting a line right through the sky above me Healthy and green just like a good tree should be Momma bird leaving now her eggs are lonely Out from the underbrush I creep so slowly I’ll lay my own, her home is sound and safe, he’s Grey like a stone among her round blue babies She’ll never tell if she’s a few shells lighter Quick cracking clever comes my little fighter  Babes that feel safer they hatch so much slower Thrown down below then by my own fast grower Momma returns to feed her only child he Smells like a stranger and he cries so loudly Drinks of his fill while I look up on proudly Picking away at the discarded bounty 

[chorus] What hides inside has the skill to thrive Do you have the will to decide to survive? A parasite needs you alive To feed their growing appetite 

[verse 2] Thing crawling thirsty, shared flesh, a blessing Drink of my stagnancy, the taste refreshing Carry a part of me and keep on climbing  Top of the ladder’s just a place for dying Dread in your gullet, ignore it, buddy Lead in the bullet, it’s harmless, mostly Let me consume you, let you defend me Curling protector, my friendly fresh meat Im in control now and I like the feeling I’ll play the role of every wound you’re healing Follow the leader was always my thing Swallow your pills and lay still, unwrithing Master of puppets is my one objective Real apex predators can be selective Relay your message, it won’t stop the spread if I replace your tongue when I open your head up

[chorus] What hides inside has the skill to thrive Do you have the will to decide to survive? A parasite keeps you alive To feed their growing appetite 

[verse 3] My stress relief, she keeps asking questions I can’t believe she thinks I’ll learn her lesson Nothing outside of me will ever get in No mocking birdie with an unblinking grin Four beating hooves, I hate to hear them thunder Trample the metal tomb I’m buried under braying beast, neighing in the womb inside her Breaking its legs to glue you back together

[chorus] What hides inside has the skill to thrive Do you have the will to decide to survive? A parasite needs you alive To feed their growing appetite…

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh it’s happening. Tim Misny is breaking containment. 

For context, I’ve lived in Ohio all my life and spent three years living in Cleveland for university (which sometimes had photoshopped tim minsy jokes in different departments!). So, inevitably I saw many, many Tim Misny ads while living there. But, this doesn’t even cover half of the utter insanity of Mr Misny Esquire. No, the man makes ‘em pay far beyond the realms of menacing billboards invoking eldritch terror upon the freeway. 

Tim Misny is northern Ohio's eldritch god, plague and menace. Or at least the real life Saul Goodman.

The completely bonkers sign of him menacingly raising his eyebrows is rather new- but before that, clevelanders were graced with the absolute beauty of Tim Misny tv and internet ads. Please let me tell you about the Tim Misny Thriller Parody . Please, it's been consuming my brain for years and no one believes me.

This is an actual advertisement for a personal industry lawyer made in 2010. A young couple enters Misnyland (yes, an actual place that is Tim Misny’s residence and also a resort(???) for the general public. I do not know anybody who has gone there, but it is advertised on his site) and are chased by clowns, zombies and werewolves etc etc. But at the end of the music video (with lyrics changed to match the divinity of Tim Misny Esquire) the monsters suddenly all turn into Tim Misny, fit with horrifying laminated Tim Misny Masks with suits to match. This is somehow more terrifying than the very silly autotune that replaces michael jackson. 

Actual Tim Misny also appears in the crowd of dopple-Misnys and shows us his true form which never appears on his billboards for some reason???

There is also a Tim Misny Commercial which the very thought of Tim Misny plagues the personification of Insurance Companies with nightmares and has honestly some of the spookiest synth tones and sound design in a commercial I have ever seen? Very surreal, very nightmarish, absolute terror in the words “And this time- he really made me pay”

There is also the gosh dang Tim Misny merch shop which just speaks for itself. Some of my favourites being the Tim Minsy clock and the the official Tim Misny body pillow (no i am not lying look at it please)

Then there is also the moment where he went on a local comedians show and told his audience to call him and that he would trick your enemy into falling in love with him and then on their  wedding day he would leave them at the altar while also simultaneously burning their house down. 

There is so much more craziness to this man besides his admittedly absolutely bonkers bill-boards. I haven't even really touched the surface of Misnyness- just what an absolute dude. It honestly shocks me that people out of the state haven't really heard of him- the guys been active in his goofiness since the 1970s. I'm pretty sure he is immortal and is just a personal injury lawyer because he thought it would be funny.

does tumblr know about tim misny??? like has the level of tim misny awareness that exists in northeast ohio broken containment and become known online yet???

ahem so my take on human bill

(i almost draw him the mummy bandages like. yk what i mean)

The music for this stream is fantastic! Just absolute bops, im so happy even if i miss the science pals. Gosh I hope it becomes available after the stream ends

Listen up!

You see a post like this? Where OP might hurt/kill themselves? You hit that button that I circled

Hit that.

Click Suicide or Self-harm Concern

Yes.

Fill in the rest of it, and hit submit. The "content you reported" will fill itself in

Tumblr will follow up and help them.

Warning: this is only for mobile. If anyone knows how to do this for desktop, please add it!

This could SAVE SOMEONE'S LIFE.

YOU HAVE NO EXCUSE NOT TO REBLOG THIS.

I DON'T GIVE A FUCK IF IT DOESN'T GO WITH YOUR BLOG'S THEME.

And yes, REBLOG. Liking does no shit at all. This isn't ig.

You reblog, people see it. You don't, people don't see it. This shit's that simple.

This could save someone's life. It's not a joke.

oh god oh no oh why oh geez

Hopefully this is a little harder than the last one!