“I think fanfiction is literature and literature, for the most part, is fanfiction, and that anyone that dismisses it simply on the grounds that it’s derivative knows fuck-all about literature and needs to get the hell off my lawn. Most of the history of Western literature (and probably much of non-Western literature, but I can’t speak to that) is adapted or appropriated from something else. Homer wrote historyfic and Virgil wrote Homerfic and Dante wrote Virgilfic (where he makes himself a character and writes himself hanging out with Homer and Virgil and they’re like “OMG Dante you’re so cool.” He was the original Gary Stu). Milton wrote Bible fanfic, and everyone and their mom spent the Middle Ages writing King Arthur fanfic. In the sixteenth century you and another dude could translate the same Petrarchan sonnet and somehow have it count as two separate poems, and no one gave a fuck. Shakespeare doesn’t have a single original plot—although much of it would be more rightly termed RPF—and then John Fletcher and Mary Cowden Clarke and Gloria Naylor and Jane Smiley and Stephen Sondheim wrote Shakespeare fanfic. Guys like Pope and Dryden took old narratives and rewrote them to make fun of people they didn’t like, because the eighteenth century was basically high school. And Spenser! Don’t even get me started on Spenser. Here’s what fanfic authors/fans need to remember when anyone gives them shit: the idea that originality is somehow a good thing, an innately preferable thing, is a completely modern notion. Until about three hundred years ago, a good writer, by and large, was someone who could take a tried-and-true story and make it even more awesome. (If you want to sound fancy, the technical term is imitatio.) People were like, why would I wanna read something about some dude I’ve never heard of? There’s a new Sir Gawain story out, man! (As to when and how that changed, I tend to blame Daniel Defoe, or the Modernists, or reality television, depending on my mood.) I also find fanfic fascinating because it takes all the barriers that keep people from professional authorship—barriers that have weakened over the centuries but are nevertheless still very real—and blows right past them. Producing literature, much less circulating it, was something that was well nigh impossible for the vast majority of people for most of human history. First you had to live in a culture where people thought it was acceptable for you to even want to be literate in the first place. And then you had to find someone who could teach you how to read and write (the two didn’t necessarily go together). And you needed sufficient leisure time to learn. And be able to afford books, or at least be friends with someone rich enough to own books who would lend them to you. Good writers are usually well-read and professional writing is a full-time job, so you needed a lot of books, and a lot of leisure time both for reading and writing. And then you had to be in a high enough social position that someone would take you seriously and want to read your work—to have access to circulation/publication in addition to education and leisure time. A very tiny percentage of the population fit those parameters (in England, which is the only place I can speak of with some authority, that meant from 500-1000 A.D.: monks; 1000-1500: aristocratic men and the very occasional aristocratic woman; 1500-1800: aristocratic men, some middle-class men, a few aristocratic women; 1800-on, some middle-class women as well). What’s amazing is how many people who didn’t fit those parameters kept writing in spite of the constant message they got from society that no one cared about what they had to say, writing letters and diaries and stories and poems that often weren’t discovered until hundreds of years later. Humans have an urge to express themselves, to tell stories, and fanfic lets them. If you’ve got access to a computer and an hour or two to while away of an evening, you can create something that people will see and respond to instantly, with a built-in community of people who care about what you have to say. I do write the occasional fic; I wish I had the time and mental energy to write more. I’ll admit I don’t read a lot of fic these days because most of it is not—and I know how snobbish this sounds—particularly well-written. That doesn’t mean it’s “not good”—there are a lot of reasons people read fic and not all of them have to do with wanting to read finely crafted prose. That’s why fic is awesome—it creates a place for all kinds of storytelling. But for me personally, now that my job entails reading about 1500 pages of undergraduate writing per year, when I have time to read for enjoyment I want it to be by someone who really knows what they’re doing. There’s tons of high-quality fic, of course, but I no longer have the time and patience to go searching for it that I had ten years ago. But whether I’m reading it or not, I love that fanfiction exists. Because without people doing what fanfiction writers do, literature wouldn’t exist. (And then I’d be out of a job and, frankly, I don’t know how to do anything else.)”
— “As a professor, may I ask you what you think about fanfiction?” (via meiringens)
I rewatched S1 and S2 of The Umbrella Academy for the tenth time, and I decided to keep track of how many times the characters said certain words
alright folks, who's your weird regular? we have "snake guy" who always has a snake crawling on his arm (i've posted pics of it on here before)
Klaus: Be gay, do crimes is all well and good, but one can also be queer, instill fear
Viktor: you forgot be trans, throw hands
Diego: be bi, go for the eye
Five: Be ace, punch face
Luther, the struggling token straight™️:…I’m scared of you all
netflix… if i see you in the streets…
I haven't seen a warning for it going around so TUA S3 EP10, a warning for trypophobia at about the 32:30 mark and a quicker moment at about 34:20
reginald lied to klaus about his death in 3x07. in 3x06, when klaus comes to visit him, it’s a day; it’s still a day when reginald electrocutes him to death:
it’s night, when allison comes to the academy with harlan’s body in the trunk (and there’s also klaus’ body somewhere in the academy):
and it seems only the NEXT DAY reginald takes klaus out for training. in 3x07, reginald tells klaus he remained dead for 22 minutes. so, klaus probably thinks it’s still the day when he told reginald about the white buffalo suite; the last thing he remembers is being electrocuted. reginald also adds that klaus was totally vulnerable, and he could’ve taken any of his organs. klaus is shocked, because why good ol’ reggie would do that, right?
the training starts at 1:15 p.m., reginald writes it down. logically, klaus’ 22-minute-long death should be listed as 001, but:
it’s 004. 22 minutes - lower body (something something), and LACERATION? before that, 003 - failure (?).
between klaus’ FIRST electrocution and the bus-ball training, reginald had killed him not one, but four (FOUR!) times. and, most likely he did indeed try to cut him/cut out his organs (?) to check on how/if his dead body can heal itself. spoiler alert: klaus CAN HEAL HIMSELF even when he’s dead. later, we can see it in 3x09 when he comes back to life when the wound on his stomach has ALREADY healed. (so no one could steal his falling out guts, right? reginald knew. old bitch fucking knew).
so, i think reginald kept electrocuting klaus all night between 3x06-3x07 (with the method reginald chose, it could probably mess up klaus’ memories? he literally doesn’t remember shit except for being electrocuted one last time?) until he made sure that: a) klaus comes back fairly quick now (attempt 003 says 26 minutes, not bad, not bad!) and b) his body heals from any injuries so haha getting crashed with a car is not a big deal.
i hate when other people are funnier than me.
DNI: Homophobic, transphobic, Ace/Aro-Exclusionist, racist, xenophobic, classist, ableist, sexist, antisemitic, pedo, anti-shippers.
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