Sad-girl-autumn-version - Sad Girl Autumn

I appreciate everyone involved in making Pedro Pascal look like this in The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent.

Verified Lover

Track 1 - Blue Check Heart

Carmen "Carmy" Berzatto x Orginal Character

Carmy gets his blue checkmark on Instagram and immediately breaks Natalie's 'rules'.

The Bear MasterList

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Carmy was in the office, absent-mindedly scrolling through his email when he saw confirmation from Instagram. After an initial wave of confusion, he read it to see his account had been ‘verified’ - whatever that meant. His eyes skimmed the body of the email before going back into the kitchen to see Natalie on her laptop at one of the free stations.

“Hey, Bear.” she smiled when she noticed Carmy approaching her.

“Yo. What does being verified on Instagram mean?” Carmy asked as he pushed his hands into his pocket, peering over her shoulder to look at the spreadsheet Natalie had been working on.

Natalie laughed, “How is it that a 26-year-old doesn’t know what being verified on Instagram means?”

Carmy rolled his eyes, “Sugar. What does it mean?” 

“It just means you are who you say you are and that your account has some perks. I verified your, Syd's, and The Bear’s official accounts. In theory, having The Bear verified means it’ll be easier to get bigger names to come to The Bear.” Natalie explained without looking up from her screen.

“Got it.” Carmy nodded and began to walk away.

“Also, be careful with what you like. We don’t want our head chef looking like a pervert or overly politically charged—just be normal. People can see what you like and comment on,” Natalie warned. Carmy waved off the comment. He only followed 20 accounts, and most of them were fellow chefs. 

~

Later in the day, Carmy couldn’t help but notice two of the college-age bartenders doing some synchronized dance behind the bar. Carmy watched for a moment before one of them noticed and immediately stopped before shyly looking away. The other noticed her stop, looked over, and saw Carmy standing by the kitchen door watching them. “Sorry, Chef Carmen…” she said, taking her phone from where it had been propped and shoving it in her back pocket.

“Why is my staff dancin’?” he asked as he approached the bar.

“Lola Lousie put out a new song, and the dance is fun.” one of the girls explained. Based on Carmy’s face, the other jumped in, explaining that it was the ‘hot-girl summer I publicly dumped my lying cheating ass hole boyfriend’ anthem. Carmy nodded, still confused about the entire thing.

“Prep work done?” he questioned. 

“Yes, Chef Carmen,” they answered in unison. Carmy nodded and walked back to the kitchen. As the shift passed, Carmy kept hearing the name ‘Lola Louise’ and how ‘iconic’ her new song and video were. Carmy ignored the chatter and focused on cooking. 

~

Lola Lousie, the topic the waitstaff couldn’t drop. Carmy could ignore it until one of the waitresses held up Richie, talking about her new Instagram post. He threatened to ban the topic if it continued to be distracting. 

Curiosity killed the cat. That night, in bed, Carmy found himself scrolling through Instagram when he finally tapped the search button and found himself on Lola Lousie’s account. Carmy inhaled deeply. She was gorgeous. She had long, silky brown hair with dazzling emerald green eyes. Her soft, pillowy, plump lips were sculpted in the most endearing, playful pout. He swiped through her feed and became more intrigued by this woman. He scrolled through selfies and magazine covers. He chuckled when he saw a picture of a German Shepard with lopsided ears ‘wearing’ a pair of Prada sunglasses captioned ‘I thought boys didn’t steal their mom’s clothes... I stand corrected.’

When Carmy got to the original dance video, his bartenders had been trying to copy he couldn’t help but feel like a bit of a creep. He understood how the song was a ‘hot girl summer I publicly dumped my lying cheating asshole boyfriend’ anthem but watching Lola Lousie move the way she did made his pants feel a little tighter. Pop music wasn’t his thing but the girls were right. He could see how a song like that could be considered ‘iconic’. He liked a couple posts before tossing his phone to the side and calling it a night. 

~

“Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god!” Natalie scolded as she entered the office that morning. She hit Carmy’s shoulder with each ‘oh my god’. Carmy removed a headphone and blocked her hits.

“Sugar- what the fuck?!” he exclaimed as he pushed back from his desk and rolled back to create some space between him and his sister. 

“Carmen Anothny Berzatto. I told you to be normal on Instagram, and what do you do the first day after being verified? Like six posts from some pop star that she posted over a year ago! Now you’re on a fuckin’ gossip page!” Natalie scolded, reaching over to hit his bicep. Carmy grabbed her wrists and scowled at her.

“Will you stop fuckin’ hittin’ me?! What the hell are you even talkin’ about?” Carmy challenged as he dropped her wrists, pushing her back gently. Natalie rolled her eyes and dug for her phone.

“Michelin star chef Carmen “Carmy” Berzatto, LoLou’s next boy toy? Screenshots below.” she read from her phone before flipping it to show Carmy. “Carmy. I do not need you going around Instagram liking girls’ thirst taps- EVERYONE can see what you’re doing!” Natalie huffed before stomping out of the office, muttering something about Claire.

Carmy rolled his eyes at Claire's mention and leaned back in his chair, pushing his hands through his hair before pulling his phone from his pocket. “You never even liked your damn girlfriend’s posts, Carmen!” Natalie yelled from the kitchen, still frustrated with him.

Carmy sighed before he yelled back, “She wasn’t my girlfriend.” he got up from his chair and frustratedly closed the door to the office. “She wasn’t my fuckin’ girlfriend… just my friend who happened to be a girl…” he muttered as he sat down in his chair again. He unlocked his phone and saw an influx of notifications on Instagram. None of them were particularly interesting. All he’d done was like a few Instagram pictures, but it had turned into this mess. He rolled his eyes as he cleared the notifications, but one stuck out.  @ LoLou sent you a message request

“Any open tables tonight, handsome? I’d love to taste your food… or something like that.”

“Oh shit…” Carmy mumbled to himself, what did he get himself into?

“Ayo forever”

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Lucy Dacus about the Bear and Ayo Edebiri

I can relate

·: 𝐂𝐫𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲

(𝐒𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐛𝐨𝐱 𝐕𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧)

Too many thots, too little time. Welcome to the boyfriend’s dad!Andy Barber sandbox for my one shot: 𝐂𝐫𝐮𝐞𝐥

𝗣𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 | boyfriend's dad!Andy Barber x reader, ft. dilf neighbour!Bucky Barnes, dilf!Ari Levinson, lumberjack!Steve Rogers

𝗪𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 | SMUT - minors DNI, AGE GAP, cheating, boyfriend's dad!andy (he is a warning), daddy kink, specific warnings in each part

𝗦𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆 | Icky college boys will never change—so sleep with their dads.

♫ ·ﾟ𝐂𝐫𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

𝗧𝗼𝘁𝗮𝗹 𝗪/𝗖 | 11.5K

𝗔/𝗡 | reminder that this is a fanfic, I don’t condone cheating. No update schedule. Look at what you did bestie, @sarge-barnes-sir, from this ask. thank you to @sightiff for the title😌 No update schedule, no taglist. [*=smut] ☼ 𝐃𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐊𝐨-𝐟𝐢 ☼

I don’t do taglists anymore. ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐅𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰 & 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐨𝐧 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐫𝐲: @𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐫𝐲

Feel free to send blurb requests or asks about this series!

˗ˏˋ𝐌𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭ˎˊ˗ ⋰˚ 𝐂.𝐄. & 𝐂𝐨. 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐓𝐒: (3/?)

Cruel*

Hell’s Kitchen*

First Impressions

En Voyage* (1/3) - battle of the dilfs: boyfriend’s dad!andy, dilf!bucky barnes, dilf!ari levinson

(2/3) battle of the dilfs: boyfriend’s dad!andy barber, dilf!bucky barnes, dilf!ari levinson & ft. dilf!Frank Adler

Triune* (3/3) - battle of the dilfs: boyfriend’s dad!andy barber, dilf!bucky barnes, dilf!ari levinson, & ft. lumberjack dilf!Steve Rogers, dilf!Frank Adler, dilf!Ransom Drysdale

𝐨𝐧 𝐀𝐎𝟑

𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐑𝐁𝐒: and set-in the story drabbles

hot tub and the dilf next door*

after “Cruel”*

first time calling andy daddy*

andy sending you videos* | you sending andy pictures*

your relationship(s)

in andy’s office* | panty stealing*

some of the camping trip* | a snippet of the camping trip* | snippet of the pussyjob donations* (ft. the dilfs: andy, bucky, ari)

drunk calling Andy

On The Line*

𝐆𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐑𝐘: tags

𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐬: #cruel drabble

Discussions/Drabbles: thots | fluff

all asks | ideas | art | spicy videos | videos/tiktoks | about | psa

battle of the dilfs

Characters: andy | reader | bucky | ari | steve | ransom

Joel Edgerton as Owen Lars

Obi-Wan Kenobi (2022) part VI

karen should be able to drop kick wwe style matt at least five times a day i would even pass her the chair from beneath the ring oh my god

I think that falling asleep in a cute girl’s cozy hoodie (bonus points if I’m also in her arms) would fix me on a cellular level

The Bear + Text Posts

i swear to god maslow's hierarchy of needs does Not apply to me when i'm sick with a hyperfixation. like memes aside i actually need to think of this fictional bitch more than i need food or sleep. basic need is Talking About The Fictional Bitch actually