Starving To Death This Morning Because Ive Been To The New Local Cafe Twice This Week Already And If

I think the discussion that made time loops my brand was entirely confined to Twitter, so since this website has gone all in on time loops of late, here, have the story:

Several years ago, I suggested to my wife that we have an agreement that if either one of us ever came to the other and said that we were in a time loop, we just accept that it's real and get on with things, thereby eliminating the frustration of the looping partner having to convince the other one every day.

She REFUSED. Because "time loops aren't real."

Well, we had this debate on and off for several years, and finally, she got tired of me bringing it up and agreed. So now we have a deal: We'll believe each other, but if I ever do it as a joke, the deal's off.

It turns out that the reason that my wife has been refusing to make this agreement is less that time loops aren't real, and more that she's concerned I would come to her one day, claim to be in a time loop, and then the next day declare the time loop had finally broken. And since that is, of course, exactly what it would look like to her if I really was in a time loop, she'd have no way of proving it.

I explained to her that she's completely right, that would be incredibly funny, but I'd never do it because there's a part of me that is legitimately nervous that I will actually end up in a time loop one day, and I need her to believe me.

someone: why do you read so much soulmate shit it’s cheesy 

me internally: uhh probably because i’m obsessed with the idea of unconditional love and someone who won’t abandon me. the idea that i am destined for love and therefore inherently lovable means more to me than i can express with words, and compounded with the idea of someone who will love me forever, the concept of soulmates truly appeal to the (large) part of me that makes me feel that i’m going to die alone

me aloud: i just think it’s neat

Part 1 <- this post Part 2 Part 3

I know too much about Christian lore to enjoy this play about the nativity story

Mary didn't get pregnant by the "holy spirit" God was very much a physical part of that conception

Absolutely bonkers that I'm now one of those weirdos you hear about on Twitter

the cdc says please let me in your house. pretty please. i'm not a vampire i promise. i don't bite people either. i can't cross the threshold until you invite me in. you're being rude

I just saw a family where the mom and both daughters were wearing ankle length jean skirts. The girls were probably 6 & 4

I just feel like that's too early to subject those girls to the horrors of jean skirts

robin bullying batman part 2

Clark: Hi! You must be Batman’s sidekick!

Robin!Dick: Actually, he’s my sidekick.

Bruce: No. Stop telling people that.

Dick: You’re saying that if I left right now you wouldn’t follow me?

Bruce:

Dick: Yeah, that’s what I thought.

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Bruce: Have you come up with any names for when you start being an independent hero?

Robin!Jason: I’m already an independent hero. We should come up with a name for you when you finally stop following me around.

Bruce: *war flashbacks*

Jason: I’m thinking something like Robin the Lesser. Or Worm, to really tie in the bird theme.

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Kon: So what’s it like working for Batman?

Robin!Tim: Batman isn’t my boss. He’s more like an annoying secretary I can’t fire because of nepotism.

Kon: But i thought you became a hero specifically to work for Batman.

Tim: I used to think that too. But do you know what I learned?

Kon: What?

Tim: Batman needs a Robin. Robin does not need a Batman.

Bruce, back in Gotham: *actively regretting listening to their comms*

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Bruce: You have to follow my orders!

Robin!Steph: No, I don’t. Just because you’re the loudest doesn’t mean you’re in charge.

Bruce: I see you and Tim have been talking.

Steph: Actually, you’re not even the loudest. *cue ear-piecing shriek*

Bruce: *falls off a gargoyle*

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Bruce, so tired: Are you gonna say that I’m your sidekick?

Robin!Damian: Tt, no.

Bruce: Oh thank God.

Damian: Goliath is my sidekick. Then Batcow is his sidekick. Titus is her sidekick and Alfred the Cat is Titus’s sidekick.

Bruce: …that’s a lot of sidekicks.

Damian: Yes. I suppose you may be Alfred the Cat’s sidekick. But if I get a new pet, you will be demoted.

Bruce: *sigh*

Ok so currently I work with a circus and part of my job is to walk them to the stage before and after each show. We all happen to be wearing black clothes, they all have bits of their colorful costumes showing, and I have bright green hair.

It is my favorite thing to walk through the crowd afterwards, and the people tell the performers that they did a great job in the show. Then they see me at the end of the line and get so confused, cause they swear there wasn't a green haired person on stage but she was in line, and is dressed just like them so she must have performed too.

Absolutely hilarious

This minecraft short comic called "A strange Coast" made by Ian Flynn I believe, I found in a book from my library I work has to be one of the most beautiful and respectful takes on the game.

It understands minecradf so perfectly and doesn't treat it as childishly as the other stories in it did.

And all that within 10 pages and no word spoken.