This Is Fucked Up…I’m (not) Sorry.

Imagine being so far in denial about the prospect of a female orgasm, that instead of being excited about being able to please the woman you LOVE, you just go “Well that can’t be right, woman can’t feel what men do”. Insane broooo….

Jopson: *sneaking away to get some rest after a long day of taking care of his withdrawal riddled captain*

That damn Bell: *rings*

Jopson:

Jacko playlist but its just the song “This Monkey’s Gone to Heaven” by The Pixies.

Dude, what if I fed you poison to put an end to your suffering, and then massaged your throat to help you swallow said poison while we made eye contact and stuff, idk. Bro that’d be like, super weird, unless…?

Me: *explaining the plot of The Terror to convert another to the horde*

Them:

Cash cow:

pay pig:

and the third, sexiest option

whore horse: