Magi: The Labyrinth Of Magic Is One Of The Wokest Shows Out There And Nothing Will Convince Me Otherwise

Reasons why I am single..

What it’s like doing Japanese at a University Level

*learning verbs*

Student to another student: “omae no haha wo shimasu” (a very janky simple way of saying “I do your mum”)

Teacher: “if you’re going to insult in your rudimentary Japanese do it properly and be polite - it’s okaa-san, not haha”

Student: “thanks sir! Anyway, omae no okaa-san-”

Teacher: “remember guys, katakana is not like hiragana. Make sure to make the lines nice and sharp!”

Student: “but are they sharp enough to kill myself on?”

Teacher: “can anyone read this katakana? What does oojii (ohgee) mean?”

Everyone almost immediately: “O R G Y?????”

Teacher: “no! it’s what you guys are!”

Girl next to me: “fucking stupid?”

Teacher: “noooo! Aussies! Aussies!!!!”

*later*

Girl to a guy: “what’s your name so I can refer to it while speaking”

Guy: “I prefer to be referred to by my overall identity - orgy”

Teacher: “don’t think I won’t fail you in the third week. Try me”

Student before a test: “do you think if I speak fast enough the teacher won’t be able to tell I have no idea what I’m saying?”

Other student: “with your skills he’ll think you’re having a stroke. But do it dude. Make me laugh so I forget how much I want to die.”

*asking what year of schooling we are in*

*I respond with 3rd year*

My partner: “YOURE OLD????”

Me: “...bitch”

Girl: “I remember how to draw “ru” in katakana because it was on all my Naruto DVD boxes”

Guy next to her: “oh same!”

Guy beside me: “well I’m not a fuxking weeb so I just studied it like normal people”

Girl: “shut the fuck up bitch you watched Pokemon like the rest of us”

Student: *answers a question*

Teacher: “that is incorrect! Please study your adjectives more!”

Student: “ah, right in the kokoro”

Teacher: “do that again and I’ll assign you more homework”

Student: “sir, when do we learn how to say ‘fuck’?”

Teacher: “when you’re responsible enough to earn it. For this class, it doesn’t look like that’ll ever happen”

lil gruvia au for melon  (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

*The collective TMA fandom, on their knees, begging for months for Mr Sims sir to reintroduce the Fucked Up Medicine Students because they were a delight and we love them*

Mr Jonny Master-Of-Psychological-Torture Sims, psychically forcing down another finger on the monkey paw: oh, is this what you want? *creates Episode 182*

Everyone: NOT LIKE THIS! NOT LIKE THIS! TAKE IT BACK! WHY IS THERE SO MANY AWFUL SOUND EFFECTS????? JONNY STOP!! 

Fitting in the rest of the romance/bromance of the M9 and NPCs just makes the whole situation better:

Nott canonically is in love with Caleb and everyone knows it and is kind of cool with it (Yeza, who drinks his respect women juice and knows what kind of woman his wife is, supports it and actually kind of gets it cause who knew self-destructing anxious wrecks hiding absolute chaotic dumbassery was his type??? Not him!). So sometimes Nott will just. kiss Caleb on the mouth in greeting and goodnight and all that happens is Caleb gets flustered and Jester demands one as well

“Nott we run a detective agency together everyone knows that fulfils the homoerotic quota for mouth kisses now lay one on me”

Fjord is good. He’s fine with no mouth kisses from Nott (but sometimes their bantering/arguing just gets.,,,,,,real intense,,,oh boy)

It also means Luke is brought up knowing who his biological parents are but since he is born from the trickster womb of Nott and grew up with the M9, as years go by he sometimes introduces other M9 members as his parents. Fellow friends and other parents are bewildered by the tirade of powerful and influential figures who all apparently sired this little halfing Luke please this giant goth woman with wings is not your mother,,,,,please,,,stop calling her Ma Yash

No one in the M9 really knows what weird connection Caduceus and Fjord have with the Wild Mother and each other, and Ducey doesn’t swing any way, but there is something very married in their morning meditation sessions, week-long “discover yourself” trips and the fact that Fjord may love Jester and Caleb but he is most vulnerable with the other cleric. They are often mistaken for husbands by any religious faction they encounter and honestly they keep getting free shit out of it so who cares???

While Jester may have the curse of accidentally seducing any WLW who comes her way (Yasha and Beau both have accepted themselves as the foundation of said curse and love it), Fjord is bisexual bait and has his own curse of seducing any Dom/Top within a mile radius, usually by getting his ass beat in the process. Avantika was not a fluke when Darrow and his duel Fight Pit/Spa date shows otherwise

Honestly though, it’s Caleb who happens to incidentally seduce the most people, and it is usually other wizard twinks with crippling issues with authority. Essek is always welcome in the tower and often in the bed as well if he’s up for it :))))

*Meanwhile, two thirds of the triad, Fjord and Caleb, grabbing onto Beau* sir, ma’am, people who know better, this is my emotional support lesbian

*Jester, grabbing the other arm* And this is my occasional bed partner and blue bestie

*grabs onto Yasha* and this is her wife and my other female friend who I occasionally kiss on the mouth

Jester’s mum is delighted by her daughter’s many and wonderful partners but her father is A Gentleman and has had Enough of his daughter crashing his places to throw impromptu “sleepovers” we cant keep replace the furniture Jessie we just cant

Honestly, people from outside the group has given up on figuring out what the fuck in happening in the M9 and chalk it up to the kind of shit that happens when you live co-dependently with people you saved the world with

(The fact that there’s been rumours of a similar group on a different continent just cements the fact. It’s been decades and some of them are important political figures,,,,,and one is apparently dead??? But sometimes he shows up on the wings of ravens or some shit and people have to accept him and his antlered wife and their purple bf starting some shit in public almost immediately,,,gross)

y’all are missing out on the funniest relationship dynamic of CR2

Forget about the tangled web of love that stretches between the M9 (barring Caduceus our aroace king of staying out of drama), I would love if the love triangle between Fjord, Jester and Caleb just somehow naturally fell into a little triad all on its own.

Like no dramatic love confessions, they do that shit constantly with each other in secret little ways, but just Jester coming home to her mother like

Jester: mama I want to introduce my partners to you

The Ruby: ah yes that handsome orc boy that you kept going on about, he was so–

The Ruby: wait, partners???

Jester: lmao yeah I have Fjord, who rejected an eldritch monster he was accidentally raising to get close with Mother Nature herself, but that hobo wizard who eventually cleaned himself up and became one of the most powerful casters around is also my bf.

The Ruby, the actual sex god on this plane of existence and all others: hell yeah my daughter deserves the best, get ‘em my baby girl.

The dynamics of it are so funny as well. Like, Caleb is a highly respected wizard now under the tutelage of several powerful figures, so any time he goes to some sort of elbow-rubbing-fancy-pancy wizard event he of course brings his beaus.

And people are like??? “Ah yes, members of the iconic and world-saving group you are part of Mr Widogast, they must be of such high pedigree.”

And then someone recognises Fjord as Captain Tusktooth who had some sort of fake accent going on for years at a time (and didn’t he sleep with that Captain lady who was horny for water or something??? And then get her killed by the pirate king? There was something about a forbidden eldritch god?) and is praying that Mr Widogast’s other partner is normal–

but the first thing that Jester tells anyone is: “have y’all heard about my mother, best lay in the land? I am the daughter of the greastest sexer around and my childhood imaginary friend is my personal god, anyway how are you?”

Even better, out of the three, the tiny blue tiefling is the only one who can pick up and hoist their partners around, making the comical sight of long-cat and long-suffering Caleb being slung bonelessly over one shoulder, while a blushing Fjord is held like a football under the other as Jester parades them down the street in her cute frilly dresses.

Fucking FjordxJesterxCaleb is where the good shit is at wake up sheeple

That moment when...

you're casually reading some gay smut online in your grandparents house as they amble on by.

someone brought a birthday cake to my math class and we didnt have napkins or plates so we used scantrons

What it's like starting WtNV

Episode 1: what the-? What's going on? Why is there no weather it's just music!! I'm so confused. Cecil's voice is so nice tho...aw he has a crush so cute. I hope he can talk to this Carlos. A few episodes later: WHY ARE ALL THE INTERNS DYING THEY DIDNT DESERVE IT!!! Why is everyone so calm about this huge ass cloud that drops dead animals everywhere??? Why are so many things not real? Why is there no weather??? Will Cecil ever talk to Carlos where we can hear?? Now: ALL HAIL THE GLOW CLOUD!! Fuck yeah I wonder what weather is coming up today? What's the death toll in this episode? 20? Nice that's less than usual. Carlos and Cecil are perfect and I would fight anyone who disrespects a single one of these characters! I have no idea what happened the past few weeks but it was fucking wild...

Brian David Gilbert and Peter Nureyev have the exact same energy, only Brian is adopted by the gays whilst Peter IS gay, and Brian is Chaotic Fetal whilst Peter is Neutral Criminal

I fucking love all the fat Taako positivity going around right now, especially with the McElroy boys chipping in and standing up for it! I'm all for soft and curved Taako looking gorgeous as hell as he kicks ass, all with his winged eye liner being sharp enough to kill a man. I love the thought of him rocking crop-tops and low cut shirts and skirts, but not giving a fuck about his soft belly and thick thighs because he knows how fucking gorgeous he is. Those thick thighs of his could crush someone's skull no problem just try him I dare you. But I also love the concept of scrawny and knobbly-kneed Taako who can be picked up single-handily by Magnus with ease. Like enemies underestimate this 'powerful and dangerous' elven wizard they've heard so much about cause he looks like a stiff breeze could blow over his stretched out frame, but the recoil from him blowing their asses up doesn't faze him whatsoever. He'd break a persons nose with the 'frail and dainty' hands that they just insulted. Fuck them. Give me all the beautiful Taako's and their diverse body images. Hell yes.