Taliesin-the-bored - Not The Preideu Annwn

Arthuriana ask game!!

bc why not

♘ Favourite Knight/King

🫅Favorite Lady/Damsol/Queen

💚 Favorite Quest/Story Arc

✒A Medieval Text You Like

📚A Retelling/Modern Work You Like

📽Recommend a book/movie/tv show etc

💛A Sibling Group/Dynamic That IS NOT The Orkneys

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿Okay Now You Can Talk About Orkneys

😤Your Most Specific Nitpick About Your Fave (anything from "Gareth would not have a beard" to "this is basically a different guy")

🥰An Arthuriana Headcanon

😏Gawain?

🥖Favorite French/du lac (Lancelot, Hector de Maris, Bors, Lionel, Galahad, ect)

👨‍👦Favorite Parent

🗡️Who Are You Betting On In This Month's Tournament?

🙏Pick A Grail Knight

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿Pick A Pelli Spawn (Percival, Aglovale, Tor, Lamorak, Aylane, Dindrane, Donar, ect)

💏Crack Ship (s)

🫂Platonic Ship(s)

Odin and Frey: drawings by Sir Edward Coley Burne-Jones and the stained glass they inspired by Brian James Waugh and Lux Fournier

Morgan le Fay casually making Satan her bitch. From a fan translation of Segurant, Knight of the Dragon, which I found on reddit here.

People who don’t know what “aroace” means never understand why I like losing when I play Old Maid.

Arthuriana never gets old, and there's always something new to be written and always something which you would not have guessed exists already.

That said, finding an Arthurian poem by Aleister Crowley where Palamedes gives birth to the Questing Beast after killing it, gets pelted with eyeballs, learns music skills equal to Orpheus', rides on an eagle, has a vision of Pan and hears the voice of Christ, becomes a hermit in Finland, and kills his own son out of necessity in the Welsh mountains was not on my bingo card for today.

So the only English translation I've been able to find online of the Irish Arthurian romance Eachtra Mhelóra agus Orlando ("The Adventures of Melora and Orlando") is on this old website, which I'll link here:

http://web.archive.org/web/20121222212746/http://www.literatefreedom.org/prae-9.4.htm#Adventure

However, I've copy-pasted the text and footnotes onto this PDF for anyone who wants to finally read it:

Hope both links work for everyone. Let me know if they don't.

Also let me know if you want me to adjust the format of the PDF if there are any readibility issues.

It's a rare day that I'll go to bat for Uther, but...

--"The Death-Song of Uther Pendragon"

...there is compelling evidence that he knows what a rock is.

Really, it would probably be better for everyone if he became a geologist. Better yet, since he says he's a skilled poet and harper, he should have been a bard.

Arthurian characters ranked by how good a geologist I think they'd be:

Uther. There is no evidence he knows what a rock is. 0/10

Gawain. Could probably swing a rock hammer pretty hard, but has a history of not disclosing outside funding. 2/10

Bedivere. Likely has some experience in studying geography when making battle plans. 3/10

Arthur. He touched a rock once. He also has a decent amount of patience and strategy skill from being a king. 4.5/10

Lancelot. Good at getting lost in the woods, but I think he would forget to label his samples. 4.5/10

Tristan. He jumped off a cliff and survived once, which is a very geologist thing to do. 5/10

Merlin. Apparently very good at putting swords in stones, which means he knows what rocks are. Points off for getting trapped in a cave. 6/10

Morgan le Fay. Has experience in employing the scientific method through her attempts to murder Arthur, and is generally a very learned woman. 9/10

Palomides. Knows that the Earth is round, and is good at finding things in the wilderness. He cried by a well once, thereby demonstrating his knowledge of groundwater systems. 10/10

Victor Frankenstein used corpses. Merlin used blood and fingernails.

Merlin is Frankenstein on a budget and Frankenstein is budget Merlin.

Gargantua, artificial grandson of Lancelot and Guinevere.

One I didn’t like at first but which really grew on me as I read more of his poems is Edwin Arlington Robinson’s characterization of Gawain. He appears in Tristram, Merlin, and Lancelot, always as a side character who’s only there for a fairly short time, so you have to fit his arc together from the fragments. At the start, everyone sees him as cheerful and careless—he’s called “gay Gawaine” in the old sense of the word more than once—but he’s more insightful than most of the others give him credit for, and, after his brothers are dead and he becomes unhinged in his quest for revenge, you realize that he was already unhinged and his cheerful flippancy was a coping mechanism/mask. He also has a delightful way with words. In Tristram, he tells Isolt of Brittany that he isn’t sure whether he’s hitting on her or not but it doesn’t matter because “Tristram, off his proper suavity, has fervor to slice whales, and I, from childhood, have always liked this life.” During his last conversation with Lancelot, Gawaine tells him, “A gloomy curiosity was our Modred, from his first intimation of existence. God made him as He made the crocodile, to prove He was omnipotent.”

Tell me about the best modern characterization of your favorite Orkney brother(s).

Pick and choose from whatever adaptations or retellings you know of, they don’t all have to appear in the same story. No wrong answers. :^)

Crop-Eared Dog makes the overzealous descriptions in the Vulgate look tame

This is a quote about the villain, the Knight of the Lantern, who should consider getting a job at Vogue if being his brother’s seneschal doesn’t work out:

“And when they were in a pleasant state, drinking and pleasuring, the king arose standing, and he looks to the four broad-bordered quarters on each side of him all around ; and he saw one young champion, armed, accoutred, and equipped, approaching him; and a tunic of fine silk around his white skin; a wonderful gold-threaded mantle above his fair tunic; and a firm, close, well-woven breastplate about his slender, brightly beautiful, well-curved body; a handsome gold-hemmed scapular above that breastplate; and a goldenhilted, ingenious, broad-grooved sword on his left thigh. A beautiful, very firm, jewelled diadem of manifold art about his head; a shapely, studded, flesh-coloured shield on the ridge of his back, and lines of golden letters in the edges of that royal shield, to announce and proclaim that there was not at the back of shield or sword in the world a warrior or champion better than that mighty soldier. Two angled spears in his white right hand; he had a long, narrow, radiant face, and a grey, clear-glorious, fresh, brilliant, joyous eye in his head ; and he had a slender, shapely, handsome mouth, a smoothslow, quiet, kingly raising in his eyelids, springs of love in each of his royal cheeks; and the people of the world were inferior to him. And in this wise was he; a glistening, full-lighted lantern was in his left hand, and the king was watching him till he came to his presence; and King Arthur asks news of him.”

I mean, really. Describing Lancelot’s eyebrows is weird enough, but glowing descriptions of eyelid raising are on another level.