Biden Biden You Can't Hide

fluffy 21? thank you :)

Lexa sat patiently on the bed, occasionally glancing at her phone. She heard a thump and a groan and looked toward the bathroom.

“Babe?”

“Not yet, not yet!” The reply came.

Lexa sighed and scrolled on her phone, mindlessly clicking on the pictures that popped up on her feed. When an article finally caught her attention, she didn’t hear the door open.

“Lexa.”

“Hm?” Lexa looked up and felt her jaw drop, but most likely not for the reason her wife wanted.

“Oh my god,” she said, then couldn’t stop a burst of laughter.

“Lexa! It’s not funny!”

Clarke stood in all her glory, wearing a human-sized bee costume with the antenna hat to match. It looked like the stomach was padded with thick and soft material, making Clarke look especially round and wildly adorable.

Lexa stood up with tears in her eyes. “Are you going to teach these kids about the birds and the bees?”

Clarke glared at her, folding her arms beneath her ridiculously fuzzy chest, which somehow made her look even less intimidating.

Lexa touched her antennas. “I wouldn’t mind a lesson.”

“If you think you’re getting laid after laughing at me, think again.”

“Okay, okay,” Lexa said, trying to control her facial muscles. “It — it looks great.”

Clarke stared at her for five long seconds before Lexa exploded into laughter again.

“Oh my god, I can’t stand you,” Clarke exclaimed. “You said it looked cute when I showed you a picture!”

“Yes, on the preschooler modeling it!” Lexa tried to defend herself. “You said they had an adult version! I assumed it didn’t look like… this.”

“Oh like this, huh? And what is this, Lexa?”

Lexa bit her lip. “It’s just so… fuzzy. And bright. That yellow is very bright. I mean, it’s practically neon.”

Clarke pinched her arm. “Ow!” Lexa whined,

“That’s for promising Octavia’s kids we’d dress up for their stupid themed party and then you bailing on me.”

“How could I know Anya would plan lunch?” Lexa justified weakly.

“Oh shut up,” Clarke glared at her. “You’re abandoning your wife for your older sister. It’s duly noted.”

“Babe,” Lexa pouted, “I haven’t seen her in five months. I see Octavia every week.”

Clarke said nothing, maintaining a steely stare. Lexa couldn’t help but notice the popped collar of the costume paired with the hat made Clarke’s face look rounder.

“I know you’re trying, but you’re not very intimidating,” she pointed out, amused.

Clarke stepper closer, their noses almost touching. Lexa could feel one of the antennas poking the top of her head but abstained from making a remark that would likely keep her from seeing her wife naked for a good week.

“Um… I take it back,” she said instead. “You’re the fiercest bee in the land.”

She felt Clarke’s breath and glanced at her mouth, smiling softly as she leaned forward.

Clarke pulled back just as Lexa’s lips brushed against hers. “That’s what I thought. I’m going to get my purse.”

When she turned around, Lexa made the mistake of glancing at her ass, which, granted, in any other situation would not have had such tragic consequences. But when she saw that the costume’s stinger bounced with each one of Clarke’s steps, she slapped her hand over her mouth.

The noise made Clarke look back at her. She narrowed her eyes when she realized Lexa was covering her mouth. “Don’t you dare.”

Lexa shook her head, “Hm-mm.”

Clarke waited a few seconds before she turned around again. It took barely one step for Lexa to crack.

“Divorce!” Clarke shouted dramatically as she walked away with her bouncing stinger, further fueling Lexa’s fit of laughter.

this…this is what i get angry and rant about when im super drunk

Love this

okok so i promised a clexa fic rec for @askweisswolf​ and i am going to deliver so here it is. organized by genre bc that’s the easiest. Most of these will be completed works / one-shots

If ur dyin for that good ole canon feel (but not actual canon)

Within Me An Invincible Summer by thrace - lit my forever fav, Clarke and Lexa’s story after the mountain. Multi-chap, completed

what the ground grows by coldmackerel - clarke gets shot in the head, and by some miracle survives. serious but also humorous and sweet in all the right ways. Multi-chap, completed

when my heart is at war by mopeytropey (scriptmanip) - the ark comes down to earth after lack of resources leaves them with no other option, and upon their crash landing onto earth, the remaining survivors are deemed unthreatening and welcomed into Wood’s Clan society. Multi-chap, completed.

(my) Destruction Within Your Mouth by KL_Morgan - you might recognize this one bc it was around back when clexa was in its heyday but its still going!! canon divergent after season 1 episode 3. Multi-chap, ongoing. (check out their other series,  The Lay of Looking-Glass Land for more canon divergent goodness)

Supernatural (ooooooo)

Yours for the (s)taking by faithtastic - Vampire lexa finds herself on the wrong side of Nurse Clarke. one-shot

breathe into my lips the life i do not have by ur_the_puppy - i kno i’ve already recced u this author but literally you cant go wrong. one-shot

while the darkness lasts by onemilliongoldstars - Clarke works at an occult law firm and Lexa is a vampire. one-shot

Our Galaxy by AphroditesLaw - based on the prompt “witch makes a deal for your firstborn but ends up falling in love with you” and lbr here that’s gold tier stuff. Multi-chap, ongoing. 

Howl by Vaderisbae - I haven’t read this one personally but it seems it could be something you might enjoy? multi-chap, completed

Violet Blue by Teroe (aka yours truely) - married werewolf clexa in the suburbs. its complete fluff tho, so I’d completely understand if thats not ur thing XD. Multi-chap, completed

Modern

falling apart is as human as it gets by brokendevil - ANGSTTTT but the good kind. one-shot

a year of sundays by brokendevil - a hs au from the same author as the one above and it’s also got the angst but its masterfully done. multi-chap, completed

More Women than Warriors by steklir (SilentStars) - the boarding school au and it is amazing. multi-chap, completed

a pleasant undoing by mopeytropey (scriptmanip) - friends to lovers done masterfully, its just *chef’s kiss*. multi-chap, completed

Remember Me. by C_AND_B - Clarke gets into an accident and loses all memory of Lexa. one-shot

in love and war and politics by centuriesofexistence - that politics au where Clarke is running for senator and Lexa is her campaign manager. things of course get messy. Multi-chap, completed.

how can you not love kids lmao

Your top 5 fav Clexa fanfic?

These probably aren’t gonna be new to anyone but here we go

1. Within Me An Invincible Summer by thrace

Canon. Complete

this is probably the ultimate fav. just the writing and the characterization and like the absolute spot on understanding on clarke and lexa’s personal relationship, the past vs present timeline and how it shows growth. like im a ho for this fic.

2. what the ground grows by coldmackerel

Canon. Complete

i love coldmackerel’s style of writing and this one takes the cake for me. serious but also humorous in just the right ways, especially considering this fic’s subject matter. 

3.  a pleasant undoing by mopeytropey (scriptmanip)

Modern AU. Complete.

I just love modern aus so much ok and this one hits all the right buttons. the pining, the longing looks and touches and the way clarke and lexa’s friendship just evolves like it does. *pacha meme*

4. a year of sundays by brokendevil

High School AU. Complete

mmm the good angst, but also like very much in my preferred vein where its more clarke/lexa vs the world. Im surprised i didnt think to include this on that other rec list from a couple days ago. 

5. maybe they will sing for us tomorrow by someonelsesheart

Reincarnation AU (but also canon in a way??). Complete

bittersweet!! but i love it. short but that means every little part of it is spot on great stuff.