Help A Trans Man Get Out Of Pakistan

my desk is literally the cutest thing ever ahhhhh🥺

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some criminal class notes (again because it is my favorite subject in college 😳)

#qotd: which is your favorite subject in college/school?

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i’ve been living here for more than a year now and still haven’t joined a gym which sucks

props to stem people wtf! i can bullshit my way through any english essay because literally u just have to say stuff. but for stem paper u have to say stuff AND it has to be true. wack. 

Saturday, 12th June 2021

A page from the periodic table book I’m currently reading (bismuth crystals my beloved <3) and, you guessed it, some of my flashcards!

🎵 CORALINE - Måneskin (me: doesn’t watch Eurovision, also me: *hears a rock band won and proceeds to listen to all of their songs*)

I constantly feel intimidated by math. Like only some people get it and others just don't. I can't make connections and lose hope quickly. I am pursuing a combination of statistics, economics and math so math^3. How can one romanticize sitting in the same place and wrestling with difficult abstract math concepts without giving up? I am just penning this to find some point that triggers action in me.

Math is practice, practice and just when you think you're done practicing, you need to practice some more. I believe the issue is that in public schooling resources are very limited and teachers are undoubtedly overworked. This is a major issue with any subject but I believe particularly with math because, depending on which part of the subject you're currently engaging, it's the most abstract thing you will have to deal with. If you don't get it, well the resources simply aren't there for your teacher to take time with you and help you.

In reality math is nothing like that. As I have quoted before: “If you are receptive and humble, mathematics will lead you by the hand.” (Paul Dirac). I stand by this and will until my last day. Math requires an open mind and time, it does not like to be rushed and it will not stand for abuse. If you treat it kindly and patiently you will be rewarded. I understand it can be annoying/painful to have to take longer to grasp with content, just as it is annoying to practice the same kind of problem a thousand times but it's the way. You need to allow yourself to be wrong, to slam your head against the wall because you don't know how to proceed with problems. All of it is deeply painful, but remain open and calm and it will pay of.

When it comes to romanticizing mathematics I don't believe there is one right way. I love the rush I feel when I finally know the next step in a problem I've been stuck on for a day already. I feel butterflies in my stomach when I go outside and watch the water oscillate, when I look at bridges and try to figure out what parabola they describe. Small things in real life can always be reduced to math, and when you're out on a walk enjoying the weather it's a nice thing to focus your thoughts on. I love standing up, looking down at my desk which is filled with papers all over the place. Some filled with notes, others completely scratched out. To look down and tangibly see all the work I have done in the past few hours. Perhaps all of this applies to you, perhaps none of it applies. At the very least I hope you have some ideas now.

6 Things People Don't Always Tell You About Studying

1. you ace tests by overlearning. you should know your notes/flashcards/definitions basically by heart. if someone asks you about a topic when you’re away from class or your notes and you can answer them in a thorough and and accurate answer, then you’re good, you know the material. 

2. if you don’t understand something, it will end up on the test. so just don’t disregard and hope that this specific topic won’t be on the test. give it more attention, help, and practice. find a packet of problems on that one concept and don’t stop until you finish it and know it the best. 

3. sometimes you just need that Parental Push. you know in elementary school, they would tell you “ok now it’s time for you to do your homework! you have a project coming up, start looking for a topic now!” ONE of your teachers might be like this. be thankful for it and follow their advice! these teachers are the best at always keeping you on track with their calendar. if not a teacher, then have one of your friends be that person that can keep you accountable for the things you promised you would do. 

4. you just need to kick your own ass. seriously. i know it sucks and its hard to study for two things at once. BUT. I DONT CARE IF IT’S HARD. you need to do it and at least do it to get it over with because you can’t keep putting things off. If you do, you will eventually run out of time and you will hate yourself. force yourself to do it. i made myself sign up for june ACT even though there’s finals because if i didn’t, i probably never would. like do i think i’m gonna be ready in one month? probably not, SO I BETTER GET ON IT AND START STUDYING! 

5. do homework even if it doesn’t count. if you actually try on it, then you will actually do so much better on the tests, it’s like magic. 

6. literally just get so angry about procrastinating that you make yourself start that assignment. I know how hard it is to kick the procrastination habit. I have to procrastinate. So I make myself start by thinking about my deadlines way early. I think, “oh i have a presentation in three weeks (but it really takes 2 weeks to do), i’ll be good and start today.” when that doesn’t happen, you say you’ll do it tomorrow, and this happens for like the next four days. I get so mad at myself for not starting when i am given a new chance to do so with every passing day. By that time, you actually have exactly how much time you need for it AND you were able to procrastinate the same way you usually do ;)

a study of the moon

my favourite subject is literally whatever I get a higher grade in