And It Was A Nice Yard Once. A Garden Bed Full Of Tulips, A Lawn Blanketed With Small Clover. A Tall

shapeshift!

Two rules for creating anything.

1) Make it weird.

2) Make it with love.

via @b.sharise

"And what is this?" the priest asked sternly, pointing at the squalling bundle. "I...thought the vow of chastity only applied to humans?" the Paladin said weakly.

40,000 years ago, early humans painted hands on the wall of a cave. This morning, my baby cousin began finger painting. All of recorded history happened between these two paintings of human hands. The Nazca Lines and the Mona Lisa. The first TransAtlantic flight and the first voyage to the Moon. Humanity invented the wheel, the telescope, and the nuclear bomb. We eradicated wild poliovirus types 2 and 3. We discovered radio waves, dinosaurs, and the laws of thermodynamics. Freedom Riders crossed the South. Hippies burned their draft cards. Countless genocides, scientific advancements, migrations, and rebellions. More than a hundred billion humans lived and died between these two paintings—one on a sheet of paper, and one on the inside of a cave. At the dawn of time, ancient humans stretched out their hands. And this morning, a child reached back. 

Kevin McCarthy losing four five six consecutive Speaker of the House votes (so far) is legitimately one of the funniest things to ever happen. This is 2023's boat stuck in the Suez Canal. Something important has ceased working for the most hilarious possible reason and we are all watching desperate attempts to get it working again while secretly hoping it does not, and I think that's beautiful

You guys just have to trust me on this one and click here okay?

Me while running a fever and doing many nebulizer treatments: I'm going to hang out with some friends!

My concerned mother: but you're sick??

Me while blowing my nose aggressively: My covid test is negative, it's fine

My very concerned mother: but you are really sick????

Me while shivering from the fever and having difficulty standing up: its not covid, I'm fine

My mother who is tired of my bullshit: no, you are staying here and doing another round of the nebulizer

Me while giving up and taking a nap: fine, but you have to turn off the light for me... Thanks...

weirdest side effect of the pandemic is how many people i know who get sick and say 'but my covid tests are negative so i should be fine' like you know other illnesses. exist. right.

some good consent phrases

“May I hug you?”

“When I ask you if you want to do something, you know it’s always okay to say no, right?”

“Let me know if you get uncomfortable, okay?”

“How do you feel about (x activity)?”

(When someone’s insecure about having said no and asks if it’s okay/if you’re mad or upset they said no) “I’m disappointed to not do the thing, of course, but I’m much more glad you were willing to tell me (no/that you were uncomfortable/etc.). That’s really important to me. Thank you.”

“I’d ALWAYS rather be told no than make you feel pressured or do anything to hurt you or make you uncomfortable.”

“I care about you, so when something I do hurts you or makes you uncomfortable, I want to know, because I don’t like making you feel bad.”

“You can always change your mind, okay? The moment you wanna (stop/go home/take a break/etc), PLEASE tell me and we’ll stop right away. I won’t make a fuss, I don’t wanna keep going if you don’t want to.”

“Wanna do (x)? It’s okay if not, but I think it would be (fun/worthwhile/prudent).”

(When starting a social phone call): “Hey, are you busy right now?”

(When confirming plans made earlier): “Hey, are you still up for doing (x) at (time) on (day)?”

“Can I vent a little about (x)?”

“Can I tell you something (gross/depressing)?”

“Are you comfortable talking about it?”

“Do you think you could talk me through this problem I’ve been having? If you have the time and emotional energy of course.”

“It’s okay if that doesn’t work for you.”

“I’m interested in spending more time with you. Would you be interested in doing (x) together on (y day)?”

“No? Well let me know if you ever want to do something else.” (leave it open! don’t nag! let it go!)

“You don’t seem very interested in this. Should we skip it?”

(When someone doesn’t seem interested in something you were suggesting) “We can just (do something you both want to do) instead.” (don’t try to get them to do the thing again! let it go!)

Consent culture - it’s about way more than just sex!

Give people as much freedom as possible to make their own choices without pressure or control.

Even children deserve as much autonomy as allows them to remain safe and get their needs met - remember, you can’t train a child to make good/safe/healthy choices without ever giving them choices. A child who is taught to respect consent is a child who doesn’t assault people! A child who knows they have a right to say no is a child who knows that someone who infringes on their autonomy isn’t supposed to do that.

A consent-conscious relationship is a healthier and safer relationship, and a person who is aware of and deliberate about asking for, giving, receiving, refusing, and accepting refusals of consent is a healthier and safer person.