Latest Posts by toot-uncommons - Page 2
Finally some proper Bellini art, dedicated to @eeriedragone who likes him a bunch ;))
I gotta draw the other characters too, it’s too obvious who my favourites are😭
His way.
Buff Lawrence lives rent free in my head.
I need something to happen like he falls into a fountain or a fellow cardinal gets hurt and Lawrence takes off his shirt to staunch the bleeding, either way he takes off his shirt in front of everyone especially Vincent and the press.
I need Twitter to freak out and stan accounts about the hot Cardinal with the six pack. I need Vincent to visibly short circuit on camera and for some mid-20s college grad Catholic guys to seriously contemplate their sexuality and the possibility of priesthood as a career path over investment banking. Those hot priest calendars in Rome have a new addition for the coming year.
I need American Conservative Alpha-male podcasts to be putting this 75 year old man as a the face of Red-pill content only for the Vatican to release a statement denouncing them. Thomas is somehow responsible for a large amount of men abandoning red-pill content.
Thomas is mortified and does not want to know anything that is going on while Aldo is ecstatic. Ray and Sabbadin, who both have a Twitter account are following this drama religiously. Tedesco posts a photo of when he and Thomas were younger in a “he isn’t gay, look at him helping me when I was the victim of a car bomb” and it’s Thomas carrying him bridal-style. (Vincent is very jealous)
I cannot write a full fic for the next two weeks due to my schedule so this is my contribution to the fandom. May you feast on what little I can offer 🍝.
Unlike Conclave (2024), Conclave (2025) was a short film.
I reckon Benitez defo knows at least ONE rude song by heart. No one knows about this until like he zones out and randomly starts singing it.
Benitez: ᶠʳᵒᵐ ᵗʰᵉ ᵗᵒᵖ ᵐᵃᵏᵉ ᶦᵗ ᵈʳᵒᵖ
Aldo, probably:
I think Pope Leo XIV should establish dominance by inviting JD Vance to the Vatican and killing him
lowkey need a fic where it’s the point of view of Benitez when he finds out he’s intersex
I feel like he’d question his faith. Did he deserve his role in the church? He’d feel like he’d been lying to both God and himself the entire time.
Most of all, he wouldn’t know who he is. Full on identity crisis.
I love how Benitez was like good fucking riddance I never wanna see any of you man children ever again and they all went uno reverse bitch you’re not leaving 😭
if i was a casting director who saw the description of a catholic cardinal as young and boyish even at 67 i would have said fuck awwwfffff and given up. but thats not what the casting director of conclave said,,, they knew he was out there
funniest bit in Conclave by far is Cardinal Vincent Benítez, the only normal person in a 5 mile radius, getting up in a room full of Cardinals and going, "you are all petty, mean and a bit weird, and inshallah I shall not return here ever again" and 118 cardinals were like damn, he's right, we can't let him escape
i just know thomas and goffredo both got bullied during their seminary days for being too pretty
He is so soaking wet cat coded😔
I found the image above at like 1am yesterday and then spent the next 10 minutes searching for a good picture of goffredo and then I FEEL ASLEEP WITH HIM ON MY SCREEN. I think thats why I had nightmares
had a brainwave, it was only a matter of time
Conclave (2024) dir. Edward Berger
maybe aldo is a little bit jealous, actually
see under the cut for the original reference
Cuntclave the third
best trilogy since Lord of the rings
I’m sobbing I’m so proud of this
RIP Regina George welcome back cardinal thomas Lawrence
Something I love about conclave is the fact that Lawrence is one Tedesco outburst away from killing himself but he’s too English to admit it
Someone please get that man a holiday away from the Vatican and a vodka cola.
Okay this but as Benitez and the cardinals, do you see the vision?
if secret of the mimic doesn't have a gregory and glamrock freddy update then i'm rioting i don't care about the damn mimic i don't care about whoever the fuck edwin is i just want to know where my son went to goddammit!!!
CONCLAVE wip
He’s innocent
Hello cuntclave nation I have delivered once again
Autism and loud noise
