FBI: *gives Strict Instructions*

aftg hc of the day: neil is completely horrified by root beer floats. milk and soda should not come in contact under any circumstances. this is completely unknown to andrew until a night at the columbia house. andrew loves them, would eat them any time of any day, and happened to make a stop at the store on the way. of course neil is in the kitchen with him, distractedly messing with things here and there, until andrew starts pouring root beer into a glass. with ice cream. andrew of course notices the pure horror on neils face. neil manages something along the lines of 'are you possessed' which starts the absolute shenanigans of andrew trying to get neil to drink one. the next time the two of them are out, andrew gets one. problem being neil is gone before he's done ordering. the entire time they walk together neil is at least five feet away from him until he throws it in the trash. the next time they're out for dinner, and neil literally waits in the bathroom until andrews done with it. next time it's at their shared apartment, later on with the cats, and andrew has the fucking audacity to bring that cursed thing that came straight from the depths of hell into their home. andrew gets up to go to the bathroom and neil tosses it in the trash, glass included. the last time is in a costco. andrew foolishly thinks neil will keep some composure, only to find neil and the cart missing. it takes him ten minutes to find him again, busily loading cat food into the cart. they make eye contact mid sip, and andrew very simply says 'youre being dramatic.' but instead of a usual smart-ass response, neil replies 'im sorry, do i know you?' unfortunately, andrew makes the mistake of thinking neils making a quick joke. he's not. which leads to andrew literally following neil around for 30 minutes like something out of a horror movie while neil avoids and runs away from him at every bit eye contact. when andrew finally finishes the drink neil just asks 'oh where have you been?' the very final time is planned very strategically (white board and cats included). neil is busy while andrew orders his root beer float, making sure it's in a completely opaque cup. he tells neil it's iced coffee. neil literally acts like he's been shot. he's never been betrayed like that before, and has taken a drink of anything andrew has offered him since (unless it's in a clear cup and/or thoroughly inspected)

(dedicated [and credited] to @archiveofourfoxes ) (also the scenarios just for laughs because i had way too much fun talking about this)

Neil and his trusty duffle bag

no, you’re a person, i’m merely a vessel filled with the overwhelming urge to reread all for the game

Wymack: sometimes people ask me how i manage the foxes so easily. truth is, i don’t. i have no control over them whatsoever. aaron called me this morning and when i showed up andrew shot me in the throat with a nerf gun

i have seen the phrase "book hangover" in reference to that feeling after you first read AFTG for the first time. so i ask the fandom, how long was everyones' hangovers for this wrecking-ball of a series?

mine was just about 12 months i think

andrew, after his car is destroyed by ravens fans: in terms of money... we have no money

neil, with a quarter of a million bucks: *hands over his binder*

bc i’m just a really great person all-around, obviously: unpacking the truth

mines is “this is a safe place bc i know harries would murder me: a true crime series”

nicky buys andrew rainbow socks at pride one year as a joke and also as a futile attempt to bond. he forgets about them, but andrew often wears them under his black boots (especially when they go to eden’s) and no one knows about it. years later, at psu, nicky walks in on neil and andrew asleep on the couch. and there, peeking out from under blankets and neil’s legs, are the rainbow socks on andrew’s feet. nicky doesn’t take a picture because it feels too personal, but his heart soars at the sight and he cherishes this small victory

neil going around the baltimore hotel and checking the drawers to make sure nothing was left behind is too pure. they may have adopted him, but he still looks out for his own. and he also definitely thinks they’re not responsible enough to remember to check 

the hemmicks ask andrew to lead the prayer one (1) time at a “family dinner” and he goes “rub a dub dub, thanks for the grub, yay god”. they never ask him to say grace again