THE HILLS

hazel callahan masterlist 💥

𝐑𝐄𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐒 ˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ open !

smut ; 🐝

fluff ; 🧸

angst ; 🥀

. ₊ ⊹ . ₊˖ . ₊

ONESHOTS :

[ coming soon ]

DRABBLES :

[ coming soon ]

HEADCANONS :

[ coming soon ]

SERIES :

[ coming soon ]

╰┈➤ main masterlist send a request

FADE INTO YOU

REQUEST: loved ur billie fic sm!!!🥹 can you do billie x f!reader where r has been acting distant lately ofc shes tryna hide that but billie being the attentive girlfriend she is notices and asks r about it then r talks about wanting to break up but billie can read her emotions through her eyes so well so they talk ab it and turns out r has been feeling insecure cus billies very up there and shes just her THIS IS SO LONG M SORRY i js love u and hope to see more from u😣 thank u sm!!!🫰🏻

a/n: i adore this request tysm ily! and u can make it as long as u want (that's what she said) hope this is how u wanted it to go<3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

pairings - attentivegf!billie x insecure!reader

genre - angst, fluff

synopsis: when doubts about your worth drive a wedge between you and billie, an emotional confrontation reveals just how deep her love for you runs.

tw: self-doubt, emotional distress—nothing too serious

word count: 1.1K

i look to you and i see nothing i look to you to see the truth

⟡

a stranger light comes on slowly a stranger's heart without a home

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

"And that's a wrap!"

Applause fills the room as the interviewer stands and pulls Billie in for a brief hug. "You were amazing. It was an honor having you here," she says warmly. Billie smiles back, her signature charm on full display. "The episode will be in editing for a few days, but we'll let you know once it's ready to publish."

The brunette nods, her ocean-blue eyes catching the iridescent glow of the overhead lamp. As she exchanges goodbyes, her gaze sweeps the room, searching—only to find no sign of you.

"Hey," she calls out, tapping Finneas on the shoulder. He turns to face her, eyebrows raised. "Did she leave?"

"Yeah, about twenty minutes ago," he says with a shrug, crossing his arms. "You guys okay? I don’t usually like to get involved, but... she’s been acting different. Not just with you—just, in general."

"No, yeah, we're fine. She probably just wasn't feeling well," Billie says as she fiddles with her silver rings, though the crease in her brow betrays the indifference she tries to project. Truthfully, she has no idea why you've been acting so distant—distant enough for Finneas and even a few of your mutual friends to notice and question her about it.

After bidding her farewells, Billie heads straight for her car, a clear mission in mind as she drives to your place. She rings the doorbell, anxiously tapping her foot against the wooden floorboards of your porch.

The door opens after a few beats, revealing you—your face etched with a melancholic expression. Her brows knit together instantly, worry clouding her eyes as her hands move to cup your cheeks. Her thumbs brush over the faint streaks of dried tears.

“What happened, pretty girl?” she asks softly, concern woven into every word. “You left so suddenly, but you seemed just fine this morning. Are you feeling sick? I can grab you some soup from that place you love.”

You shake your head, stepping back from her touch before turning away and sinking onto the gray couch. Your lips are downturned, shoulders slumped, as Billie silently follows, her worried gaze never leaving you.

"I don’t know why everyone’s so worried. I’m fine," you snap, your voice sharper than intended. You meet her concerned eyes with a glare, though it falters. "You didn’t need to come over. Don’t you have some afterparty to go to with your famous friends?"

Billie’s brows knit together in confusion as she lowers herself onto the coffee table across from you, legs spread and elbows propped on her knees. She leans forward, searching your face. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing, I just…” Your voice falters, trailing off as you avert your gaze to the side, nervously chewing your bottom lip.

“Hey,” she says softly, her tone steady but full of concern. “What’s wrong?”

Her gentleness feels like a knife twisting in your chest. Guilt gnaws at you with every word, every worried glance. No matter how cold you try to be, she’s still her—loving, understanding, unwavering.

“I wanna… break up.” The words leave your lips in a whisper, barely audible, but they hit like a crack of thunder. Your tear-filled eyes flicker to hers, wide and stricken with disbelief.

“Wait—what? What?” Billie stammers, her voice cracking with shock as she processes your words. “You… you wanna break up?”

“I wanna break up,” you repeat, though it comes out shakier this time, as though the words might crumble under their weight.

“Why?” she asks softly, her voice trembling. Her hands reach out instinctively, intertwining with yours, her thumbs brushing across your knuckles in a gentle, grounding motion. “Why? I don’t… I don’t understand.”

Billie studies you intently, her gaze searching for answers you don’t know how to give. She catches the guilt etched in your features, and a quiet sigh escapes her lips as she tightens her grip on your hands—reassuring, alleviating.

“Talk to me, Y/N,” she pleads, her voice steady despite the tension in her posture. “We need to talk about this. About you. I’ve been so worried lately, and now… this? Why do you want to break up? I thought we were happy.”

“I was—am happy, I just…” You exhale shakily, lowering your gaze to your lap, where your hands remain entwined with hers. “Why me?”

“What?” Billie’s brows knit together, and she shifts closer, tilting her head slightly.

“I just— There’s nothing special about me, y’know? I’m just me, and you’re Billie Eilish. I don’t get why you’d wanna be with someone like me.”

“Fuck,” she mutters under her breath, a soft chuckle escaping as she pulls you closer, shifting you onto her thigh. Your heart flutters involuntarily, but the warmth is immediately overshadowed by the painful squeeze in your chest when you look down into her comforting, knowing gaze. “Is that why you’ve been acting so different, baby?”

You don’t respond, but you don’t have to. She sighs, her arms wrapping securely around your waist, holding you as if to anchor you in place.

“You might not be famous in the world’s eyes,” she murmurs, her voice tender yet resolute, “but you’re everything in mine. And yeah, you’re you, but that’s exactly who I fell in love with. Not some snobby celebrity, or anyone else. You. Just you. And you’re fucking perfect, love. Don’t you see that?”

"What if you find someone better, or... I don't know, things go south? It's happened before with other couples, and—"

"It won’t happen with us," Billie cuts in gently, her voice soft yet stable. "I’ll never find someone better because that doesn’t exist."

She leans in, pressing a series of featherlight kisses along your jaw, trailing down to your neck. Her warm breath brushes your skin as she exhales softly, her hair tickling you like a second touch.

"I love you," she whispers, her words grounding you as she presses another lingering kiss against your neck. "And nothing—nothing—is ever going to change that, got it?"

With a playful grin, you thread your fingers through her hair, giving it a gentle tug to tilt her head up so she meets your gaze. "Prove it."

Billie lets out a soft laugh, shaking her head as her hands tighten around your waist. "You’re insatiable," she teases, before leaning in to capture your lips in a tender kiss. Slowly, she guides you onto your back on the couch, her body hovering over yours as she trails down to your neck, leaving a path of delicate, lingering kisses that promise to leave their mark.

She pulls back just enough to kiss you again, her lips hovering over yours before she smiles softly. "I love you," she repeats, her gaze locking with yours, full of warmth and certainty.

billie eilish masterlist 🎤

𝐑𝐄𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐒 ˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ open !

smut ; 🐝

fluff ; 🧸

angst ; 🥀

. ₊ ⊹ . ₊˖ . ₊

ONESHOTS :

─ .✦ overwhelmed!billie x caring!reader - YOU'RE LOSING ME 🥀🧸

billie returns from a week-long trip to korea, leading to an intense argument that threatens your relationship.

─ .✦ attentivegf!billie x insecure!reader - FADE INTO YOU 🥀🧸

when doubts about your worth drive a wedge between you and billie, an emotional confrontation reveals just how deep her love for you runs.

─ .✦ fwb!billie x fem!reader - THE HILLS 🐝

as the rules of your casual friends-with-benefits arrangement with billie blur, one night in a hotel room becomes a turning point neither of you expected.

─ .✦ concernedgf!billie x insecure!reader - BODY DYSMORPHIA 🥀🧸

struggling with body image and online criticism, you find comfort as billie lovingly supports you and helps you confront your insecurities with understanding and care.

─ .✦ flirtatious!billie x fem!reader - BILLIE BOSSA NOVA 🐝

a long-awaited romantic getaway to a hawaiian resort with your girlfriend leaves you craving her in more ways than one.

[ more coming soon ]

DRABBLES :

─ .✦ new year's with billie 🧸

[ more coming soon ]

HEADCANONS :

[ coming soon ]

SERIES :

[ coming soon ]

╰┈➤ main masterlist send a request

vi (arcane) masterlist 🐻

𝐑𝐄𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐒 ˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ open !

smut ; 🐝

fluff ; 🧸

angst ; 🥀

. ₊ ⊹ . ₊˖ . ₊

ONESHOTS :

[ coming soon ]

DRABBLES :

─ .✦ furniture shopping with vi 🧸

[ more coming soon ]

HEADCANONS :

[ coming soon ]

SERIES :

[ coming soon ]

╰┈➤ main masterlist send a request

ellie williams masterlist 🦕

𝐑𝐄𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐒 ˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ open !

smut ; 🐝

fluff ; 🧸

angst ; 🥀

. ₊ ⊹ . ₊˖ . ₊

ONESHOTS :

─ .✦ universityex!ellie x fem!reader - OCTOBER PASSED ME BY 🥀🧸

after your best friend persuades you to take a break from studying and attend a party, you unexpectedly come face-to-face with your ex, stirring up unresolved emotions. by the end of the night, you find yourself heading home with more than just a brief escape from your studies.

─ .✦ affectionategf!ellie x fem!reader - GLUE SONG 🧸

after ellie leads you to a field for a surprise she planned, the two of you share a perfect day together.

[ more coming soon ]

DRABBLES :

[ coming soon ]

HEADCANONS :

─ .✦ losergf!ellie headcanons 🧸🐝

[ coming soon ]

SERIES :

[ coming soon ]

╰┈➤ main masterlist send a request

BODY DYSMORPHIA

REQUEST: billie being rrly worried about r eating problems?

a/n: before we get into the fic, i just want to remind everyone that your struggles are valid. i understand where you're coming from and i promise you, you're perfect just as you are, inside and out. you don't need to be slim to be beautiful. that's just society's and men's messed up standards. this is just one of many serious & important topics and i want you to know that my messages are always open if you need to vent, talk, or simply have someone listen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

pairings - concernedgf!billie x insecure!reader

genre - angst, fluff, suggestive

synopsis: struggling with body image and online criticism, you find comfort as billie lovingly supports you and helps you confront your insecurities with understanding and care.

tw: heavy mentions of body dysmorphia & an eating disorder.

word count: 1.1K

you don't have to change you're perfect the way you are

⟡

she's a pretty girl without the filter she looks beautiful with no makeup on

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

"How about In-N-Out?"

Wide grins spread across everyone's faces as they nod in agreement, then turn to you, waiting for your response. Your gaze shifts to Finneas in the driver’s seat, then to Claudia in the passenger seat, before skimming over Alex and Zoe on your right, and finally landing on Billie—your girlfriend—seated to your left.

"Oh, uh, I'll actually just skip. I already ate, so I'm full," you say with a casual shrug.

"You sure you don't want something for later?" Billie asks, a soft chuckle escaping her lips as she lightly squeezes your knee. "I know you. You always say you're not hungry, then an hour later, you're begging me to get you something to eat."

You force a smile, shaking your head. "I'm sure."

During the drive to the fast-food joint, you pull out your phone, your lips pressing into a tight frown as you scroll through the comments left by Billie’s fans on her most recent post—some cruel and cutting, others trying to defend you.

quenxbillie4life: what an ugly fatass bitch prob js a gold digger ↳ ronniel0vesbils: do u even KNOW billie? she's struggled sm with body image. have u heard not my responsibility? u have no right to say that abt her gf.

billieeilishnoticeme69: BIG BACK BIG BACK BIG BACK

billybiggestfan: elephants don't deserve to date global stars like billy ↳ ronniel0vesbils: lmao didn't even spell her name right u fake fan😭

billiespitonme: @ronniel0vesbils is legit fighting for her life out here LMFAO

The harsh words sting, and though the supportive replies are there, they feel drowned out by the negativity. You glance out the car window, trying to shake the ache in your chest, but the comments linger like a shadow.

You try to conceal your exhaustion, but it’s hard to ignore the countless nights spent sobbing, curled up with your knees to your chest, rocking back and forth as you desperately pray to wake up with a model’s body the next day.

But it never happens. And each passing day only deepens the growing hatred you feel toward yourself.

Why would Billie ever choose someone like you?

She’s one of the most ethereal-looking women on the planet, effortlessly breathtaking in a way that leaves you in awe. She never seems to have a bad moment, always stunning. Yet somehow, out of everyone, she chose you.

You sit silently, watching everyone enjoy their burgers and sip on their drinks, all the while wishing the ground would open up and swallow you whole. Deep down, you’ve convinced yourself that you’re not even worthy of a good meal—that starving yourself is just the price you have to pay to lose weight.

Your eyes drop to your hands resting in your lap, fingers fidgeting with your nails as a quiet sigh escapes. Slumping further into the seat, you tune out the lively conversations and laughter of your friends, letting the background noise blur into nothingness.

"You okay, baby?"

The gentle voice snaps you out of your thoughts. You hear the jingle of keys being tossed onto the coffee table, followed by soft footsteps padding across the wooden floor. Billie appears in the doorway, leaning against the frame with concern etched across her face. "You were acting a little weird today."

You glance away, offering only a small nod in response, but Billie isn’t convinced. She crosses the room and sits beside you, the mattress dipping under her weight as she exhales softly. Her ring-clad hand comes to rest lightly on your knee.

"You sure?" she presses, her voice tender. "You usually never say no to burgers."

A bitter chuckle slips out before you can stop it, the comment twisting into an unintentional jab at yourself. Are you really such a glutton that even Billie notices the sudden change? The thought stings.

"Yeah," you mutter, your tone tinged with self-deprecation. "That just might be the issue." You roll your eyes at your typical eating habits, the words dripping with sarcasm and frustration.

Billie’s brows knit together, a faint crease forming on her forehead as she shifts closer, tilting her head thoughtfully. “Ah,” she murmurs, her lips pressing into a thin line. “I get it, love. I know how you feel—I’ve been through it.”

Her hand moves up to your arm, fingers tracing gentle, soothing patterns across your skin. “I want you to know I’m here for you. Always. You’re not alone in this, and you never will be.” Her voice is soft but firm, her words wrapping around you like a warm embrace.

“Anything you ever want to tell me, I’m listening. And,” she adds, a small, playful smile tugging at the corner of her mouth, “you can’t be stressing your pretty little head about all this without me being involved, got it?”

Your lips curl into a soft smile, but the harsh, critical thoughts about your appearance still linger, refusing to be silenced.

Billie notices the unease in your expression. Her hand gives your arm a gentle squeeze before she guides you down onto the bed, your back pressing against the sheets and your head cradled by a pillow.

For a moment, your mind races. Really? Sex? Does she think a distraction like this will actually help right now?

Still, you push the thought aside, watching as Billie moves with quiet determination. Her fingers deftly unbutton your jeans, sliding them down your legs and tossing them onto the floor. She shifts her focus to your torso, carefully slipping your shirt over your head, leaving you in just your bra and underwear.

Instinctively, your hands fly to your stomach, trying to cover yourself. Even though Billie has seen you naked countless times, the habit of hiding feels ingrained—an automatic response to the insecurities clawing at you.

Billie is quick to pin your hands gently to your sides, her soft yet firm grip keeping them in place. Her lips brush against your jaw, leaving a trail of warmth as she moves down to your neck, collarbone, and then licks a slow, deliberate stripe down the valley of your breasts.

"Pretty fucking girl," she murmurs, her voice low and filled with adoration. A quiet groan escapes her lips as she shifts lower, her hands gliding across your skin, mapping every inch and curve with reverent care.

"I love you," she says, her words muffled as she presses her lips tenderly against your belly button. "So fucking much, angel. You’re perfect."

Her hands drift to your thighs, squeezing them gently before she peppers a trail of featherlight kisses along their length. “I love every curve, every inch of this gorgeous body,” she whispers, her tone steady and unwavering, as if daring your insecurities to challenge her conviction.

"And that's never, ever going to change."

I love your billies writingss

ty so so much anon! ur too kind 💌

YOU'RE LOSING ME

pairings - overwhelmed!billie x caring!reader

genre - angst, fluff near the end

synopsis: billie returns from a week-long trip to korea, leading to an intense argument that threatens your relationship.

tw: slight emotional abuse, relationship conflict, reader and billie are in an established relationship, billie calls reader clingy

word count: 2.7K

and the air is thick with loss and indecision i know my pain is such an imposition

⟡

i gave you all my best me's, my endless empathy and all i did was bleed as i tried to be the bravest soldier

✩₊˚.⋆🕸️⋆⁺₊✧

As the first rays of sunlight stream through the curtains, you slowly open your eyes, your vision blurry for a few seconds as you gaze out the window. Extending your arm, you touch the empty spot on the sheets beside you—cold and untouched.

Your girlfriend Billie has been in Korea for what feels like forever, though it’s only been a week. Her long-awaited album just dropped, and she’s been consumed with interviews and appearances. She hasn’t been responding to your texts much, leaving you feeling lonely. Still, you remind yourself how hard she’s working and try not to let it bother you too much.

Pulling yourself out of bed, you shuffle to the bathroom, turning on the tap to run a warm bath. Back in your room, you grab the hoodie Billie gave you before she left. Her signature scent still lingers, drawing a small, bittersweet smile to your face as your chest tightens with longing. You slip it on over matching sweatpants, preparing for a strawberry-scented bath to shake off the ache of missing her.

Today’s the day Billie finally comes home. The thought brings a flicker of excitement, breaking through the gloom of the past week. You've been counting down the hours, longing for the moment you'd see her walk through the door, ready to wrap her in your arms. You’d planned everything—dinner, her favorite movie, and the kind of quiet, comforting night you know she loves.

You’ve spent the whole morning searching Instagram for recipes, carefully selecting her favorites. After your bath, you tie your hair up into a ponytail and get to work, letting the rhythmic hum of a Clairo playlist fill the air.

Two hours pass, and you’ve prepared mashed potatoes, a fresh salad, and a pot of pasta with vegan meatballs. The table is set, the living room prepared, and her favorite movie is paused on the TV.

At about 6 PM, the sound of keys jangling at the door makes your heart leap as you set two plates on the coffee table. You rush to greet her, a bright smile on your face as the door swings open. There she is—Billie, standing with her luggage in hand, looking as stunning as ever.

“Hey,” she says, her voice soft but distant, her expression tired.

“Hi, baby,” you reply warmly. “I missed you.”

“Me too,” she says, forcing a small smile. But there’s no hug, no kiss, no affectionate greeting. Your stomach knots at the coldness in her demeanor.

“How was your trip?”

“Busy. Lots of interviews.” Her tone is flat, almost disinterested as she runs a hand through her black hair.

“I made you dinner,” you say, stepping aside to reveal the table you’d prepared. The sight of her favorite dishes and the movie queued up for the night should’ve brought a smile to her face, but instead, she sighs, rubbing her forehead.

“That’s great, baby, but I think I’ll pass.”

Your smile falters, but you quickly push aside the sting, which is instantly overpowered by your care. Checking on her is one of your priorities, and you know her well. You two have been together for a year and a half, so by now, you can immediately tell when something's wrong. “Are you okay? You seem... off.”

“I’m just tired,” Billie mutters, avoiding your gaze.

“Well, we can relax on the couch, eat something, watch the movie—”

“I wanna be alone, Y/N,” she interrupts sharply. Her tone cuts through you, the weight of her words hitting harder than you expect. “You’re going to want to cuddle and... I’m just not in the mood.”

“Oh.” The hurt threatens to spill over, but you swallow it down. “I’m sorry.”

“No, don’t do that,” she snaps, crossing her arms as her piercing gaze meets your confused expression. “Don’t guilt-trip me like this.”

“I’m not trying to guilt-trip you,” you reply softly. “I just—”

“Just drop it, okay?” she says firmly.

You hesitate, but something inside you refuses to let it go. “Okay, no. You don’t get to treat me like this after I’ve spent all day trying to make things nice for you. I know you’re tired, but that doesn’t mean you can push me away.”

“I didn’t ask you to do any of this,” Billie says, gesturing dismissively at the table. “You’re the one who went overboard.”

“Because I care about you,” you argue, stepping closer. “Because I wanted to make you feel better after a long week. All I wanted was to spend some time together, but apparently, that’s too much to ask.”

Billie’s eyes narrow. “You’re being ridiculous.”

“Am I?” You throw your hands up in frustration. “You’ve barely answered my texts, you’ve been distant all week, and now you’re acting like I’m the problem for wanting to spend time with my girlfriend.”

You almost can't recognize the person in front of you. Is this why she'd been so cold lately? Usually, after long trips like this, she'd get extremely clingy, refusing to leave your side while repeatedly claiming how much she'd missed you and peppering your face with a billion kisses.

"I've been busy, Y/N. You can't expect me to be on my phone 24/7," she argues, a frustrated groan slipping out. "What, are you gonna strangle me for doing my job?"

"Billie," you resolutely call out as you cross your arms defensively. "When have I ever not been understanding to your circumstances? I know how hard you work, and I know your job means you gotta travel around the world. And I've always been okay with that."

She lets out a dry laugh, her tone dripping with exasperation. "So, why are you acting so goddamn needy right now?"

The word hits like a slap. She knows how much that word cuts you, how deeply it taps into your insecurities.

"Why are you being so unbearable right now?" you retort, matching the volume of her tone. Not yelling, but not calm either.

"Just stop it. You're making a big deal out of nothing—"

"No, I'm not. Stop trying to make me sound crazy."

You make your way to the kitchen and grab a glass cup from the dish rack, filling it up with cold water before taking a sip. Your throat had begun to to run dry since you haven't eaten or had anything to drink all day. "You could've been nicer about it. Why are you acting surprised and attacking me for wanting to spend time with you after a week apart?"

billie follows you and leans against the counter, feigning indifference as you stare at her from the other side of the kitchen, your eyes scorching with fury. "A week's not that long."

You scoff after setting the cup on the counter in front of you. "Yeah, says you who literally couldn't wait for me to come home after I slept over at my sister's house for two days."

"That's different." She rolls her eyes and prods her tongue against the inside of her cheek. The audacity leaves you speechless for a second before you regain your composure.

"What changed?" You shake your head in disbelief as you replay the memories of the sweet nothings she would whisper in your ear after being gone for so long. Whether she'd be gone on tour for a month, or if she'd just go visit her parents and Finneas for the weekend, she'd always return to you. "Why are you acting so weird?"

Billie lets out a pained sigh as she shuts her eyes tightly, hoping this moment would just disappear. This is the first time you've seen her show a single emotion other than apathy the whole time she's been back. "I think..." she trails off, not knowing how to correctly word the sentence on the tip of her tongue.

"You think what?" you ask, growing a little impatient as you watch her part her lips again.

"I can’t do this anymore,” she says, the words spilling out like venom. “I think we need a break.”

Your eyes widen and your jaw goes slack. "What the fuck?"

Rounding the corner of the counter, you gently reach out to hold her hands, but she withdraws herself and steps further away. The room seems to tilt as her words sink in. "Where the hell is this coming from?"

“I just... I can’t be in a relationship right now. It’s too much.”

Your voice breaks as tears blur your vision. “Billie, please. We can figure this out—”

“It’s not up to you,” she says, her tone colder than you’ve ever heard it.

“Don’t do this,” you plead. Never in a million years did you picture tonight ending this way, with you practically begging her to take you back.

She steps back, shaking her head, her emotionless blue orbs meet yours, damp and red. “I need space.”

"If you just listened when I told you to leave me alone earlier, this wouldn't be happening right now." Billie's voice rises, although she's never yelled at you before. Every time you two would argue, she'd still try her best to steer clear of doing or saying anything she might regret afterwards.

"Don't you fucking blame me," you yell back, your knuckles turning white as you tighten your grip on the edge of the counter. "I just wanted to spend the night with my girlfriend after being away from each other for so long. You're the one who—"

She lets out another humorless chuckle as she steps forward, leaning closer until your faces are mere inches apart. "Say one more fucking word and I'm never coming home again." She watches your furious expression falter as your eyebrows scrunch together, a crease forming in your forehead. You remain silent and that's when she pulls back. "That's what I fucking thought."

You lower your gaze as she moves out of your view, striding towards your shared bedroom. All you hear is the sound of her footsteps padding across the ceramic floor tiles and trailing further from where you helplessly stand, before you hear the door slam. The sound reverberates through the house, leaving you frozen in place.

Your reticence lingers for a few minutes, almost as if you're too afraid to utter a single word or she'd walk out on you. A quiet sob escapes your lips when your legs give out and you slump onto a stool, burying your face in your hands as the tears finally fall.

The food's cold. It's all you can think about.

The food you spent all of last night planning out, and most of today to make. It's cold. Untouched.

Her words from earlier hit you like cinder blocks. The weight of each sentence uttered makes your heart sink further into your chest as if it's been attached to an anchor.

Questions flood your mind, each one heavier than the last. What went wrong? Was it something you did? How long has she felt this way?

You sit there for hours, drowning in your thoughts, wondering if she’s lying awake like you are, or if she’s already moved on—emotionally gone from what once felt unbreakable.

This isn't something she'd ever normally do. Billie's the most gentle person, especially with you. She'd never do anything to hurt you.

Hues of red and orange begin to spill through the living room window, painting the walls with soft, warm light. You take a shaky breath, turning your head to the window. The sunrise is breathtakingly beautiful—an ironic contrast to the emotional storm you've just endured through one of the worst nights of your life.

You sniffle quietly, wiping away the lingering tears with the back of your hand, your lips trembling from the strain of holding back sobs.

In the bedroom, Billie sits on the edge of the bed, knees drawn to her chest as she stares blankly at the wall. The faint light of the bedside lamp reflects the glimmer of dried tears streaked across her cheeks. She hadn’t bothered to turn it off, too lost in her own thoughts. Her lips are pressed into a remorseful line, her usual confidence replaced with raw guilt. She knows she messed up—knows she acted ungrateful when all you wanted was her.

A heavy sigh escapes her as she swings her legs over the side of the bed, forcing herself to get up. Thirst claws at her throat, but so does the anxiety of facing you. Deep down, she half-expects you to be gone by now—out of the house and her life for good after everything she said. But as she shuffles into the living room, Billie’s breath catches when she sees you still there, perched on the same stool by the counter where she’d left you hours ago.

Her stomach twists as she takes in your figure: slouched shoulders, tired eyes, and the faint, broken sniffles that fill the otherwise silent space. Each sound cuts deeper into her chest. She hesitates for a moment, her hand twitching as she reaches out, wanting to comfort you, but unsure if she even deserves to. Slowly, she steps closer, finally giving in to the ache in her heart.

Tentatively, Billie wraps her arms around you from behind. You flinch slightly, startled by the touch, a quiet gasp escaping your lips. It's the last thing you expected.

“I’m so fucking sorry, baby. You have no idea,” she whispers, her voice thick with emotion. Her grip tightens as though afraid you might slip away. “I don’t know what got into me last night. I never should’ve yelled at you or called you needy. You just wanted to be with me, and I—I was awful. I’m sorry. There’s no excuse for what I did.”

Your chest heaves, struggling to regulate your breathing. You can’t bring yourself to speak, the lump in your throat too heavy. After a long beat of silence, Billie pulls back slightly, moving to face you. Gently, she tilts your chin up, her heart sinking when she sees the toll her words took on you—your puffy, tear-streaked face, trembling lips, and bloodshot eyes.

Her hands cup your cheeks, her thumbs brushing away the dampness. “I did this to you,” she says, her voice barely audible, as if scolding herself. “I made you cry.”

“Was I… too much?” you croak, your voice cracking. The question hangs in the air, fragile and weighted with insecurity. “Too clingy?”

Billie’s brows knit tightly, and she shakes her head vehemently. “No. Never. You’re never too much, love. I’m so sorry.” She rests her forehead against yours, her voice soft but firm. “I’ll never lash out at you like that again. I promise.”

“It’s seven,” you whisper hoarsely, your voice still trembling.

Her eyes widen slightly. “You spent all night here crying?”

You nod wordlessly, and she exhales shakily, guilt washing over her anew. Without hesitation, Billie takes your hands, guiding you off the stool. “Come on,” she murmurs gently, leading you back toward the bedroom. As the door shuts softly behind you, she repeats, “I’m so sorry.”

You chuckle faintly, the sound raw and tired. “You’ve said that a billion times.”

“And I’ll say it a trillion more if that’s what it takes,” she replies, her lips curving into a soft smile as she wraps her arms securely around your waist. Her tone grows tender. “I love you. You’re never, ever too much for me.”

The warmth of her words soothes your aching heart, though the memory of the night still lingers. “You said you wanted a break,” you remind her, your voice a fragile whisper.

“I don’t,” she says quickly, her gaze earnest. “I was overwhelmed and stressed with everything. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. That’s on me.” Her fingers gently tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear, her touch featherlight. “But I don’t want a break. I want you. I'm sor—"

You shake your head, letting out a fragile laugh. “If you apologize again, I swear—”

Billie cuts you off with a soft, passionate kiss, pouring every ounce of regret and love into the moment. Your hands instinctively move to her shoulders, pulling her closer, grounding yourself in her warmth.

When she finally pulls away, she rests her forehead against yours, her blue eyes shining with affection and sincerity. “Let’s get some sleep, baby,” she whispers, her voice like a balm to your soul.

And for the first time that night, you feel the weight on your chest begin to lift.

rules and guidelines !

ᯓ★ PERSONAL RULES

꩜ as mentioned in my pinned post, i'm a lesbian, so i exclusively write wlw imagines and/or smut.

꩜ some days, i'm consistent with my writing, and other days, i'm not, so sometimes i might not be as active as i usually am.

꩜ if you send a request, i promise i'll get to it eventually (procrastinator cough cough). if i'm uncomfortable with a request, i'll delete it with no hard feelings ofc.

꩜ all my stories are written from the perspective of a fem!reader, so men dni.

꩜ you do not have permission to steal my work or repost it on other apps/websites. taking inspiration is great as long as i'm credited.

꩜ i do not welcome homophobes & zionists onto my profile.

ᯓ★ RULES AND GUIDELINES

꩜ requests are currently open ! you can check my masterlist to see who i'm open to writing for.

꩜ you can make requests such as: –> drabbles/headcannons –> short and long fics {fluff/angst/smut} –> smaus + texts –> series

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i WILL be writing about: (tropes such as)

friends to lovers ⋆ enemies/academic rivals to lovers ⋆ second chance romance ⋆ fake relationship ⋆ forbidden love ⋆ grumpy x sunshine ⋆ childhood friends ⋆ friends with benefits.

i WILL NOT be writing about:

extreme bdsm ⋆ non-con sex/rape ⋆ bondage ⋆ impact play ⋆ incest ⋆ foot fetishes ⋆ vomit + piss kinks ⋆ food play ⋆ pet play (what..just what😭) ⋆ daddy/mommy kinks.

that’s all i can think of for now. if you have questions or a request that doesn’t fall under the listed categories, feel free to send me a message—my inbox is always open!

OCTOBER PASSED ME BY

pairings - universityex!ellie x fem!reader

genre - university au, angst, fluff

synopsis: after your best friend persuades you to take a break from studying and attend a party, you unexpectedly come face-to-face with your ex, stirring up unresolved emotions. by the end of the night, you find yourself heading home with more than just a brief escape from your studies.

tw: mentions of alcohol, reader goes to a frat party, mild swearing (not sure if that's a warning but sure), nothing majorly serious

word count: 4.7K

you were the first to make me feel like i was me just a memory

⟡

i met you at the wrong time, didn't wanna see i was busy with the stars, you were looking at me

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

The heavy rain pattering against the stained window is the only sound reverberating around the room, though you pay no mind as your focus remains fixed on your textbooks and scattered notes. Dark circles weigh under your eyes, and your lips curl into a tired frown. With a weary sigh, you bury your face in your hands, fingers tangling in your already disheveled hair.

Finals are right around the corner, and for weeks, your dorm has become your entire world. Days blur together as you devour textbooks, trying to memorize every word like it’s second nature.

"What the f—"

"Which dress is better?"

You flinch, startled by the sudden interruption. Your head jerks up, disoriented, the voice yanking you out of the storm of thoughts swirling in your mind.

“What?” Your voice is hoarse from disuse—a reminder that you hadn’t spoken since waking up. Like every other morning, your first instinct had been to dive straight back into studying.

Turning in your chair, your face softens slightly from its earlier concentrated state when you spot your roommate and best friend, Audrey, standing in the middle of the room. She’s holding up two hangers, one in each hand. On one hangs a thigh-length light pink silk dress, while the other holds a long white bodycon dress.

You tilt your head, considering, before a chuckle escapes. “What happened to that ridiculous glittery miniskirt you bought last weekend?”

“For the billionth time, they’re sequins,” Audrey groans, rolling her eyes with mock exasperation. She sets the dresses down on your rumpled bed, then plants her hands on her hips, brow furrowed as she envisions the outfits. “Besides, I couldn’t find a top to match.”

“Oh, come on,” you scoff, leaning back in your chair with crossed arms. “You’d look good in a garbage bag.”

"Sure, yeah, and pigs can fly." Audrey quips, picking up the dresses and moving to the full-length mirror beside your desk. She holds each one against her body, lips pursed in thought as she weighs her options.

"What's the occasion, anyway?" you ask, pulling your legs up to rest your feet on the chair, leaning your elbows against your knees.

"Carter’s throwing a party." She glances at you briefly, then holds up the pink dress, clearly having made her choice. "I wanna see if he’s single. If he is, I’ll make a move. Can’t keep pining over that blond guy I saw at the campus café last week. But I heard Carter’s been hooking up with Darcy."

"Wasn't she with Dylan?"

"No, that was Daphne."

"Why do all their names start with a 'D'?"

Audrey sighs dramatically, shaking her head. "Don’t know. They might be running some kind of secret alliteration cult."

With a laugh, you turn back to your desk, lowering your legs as the brief moment of lightheartedness fades and reality settles in. Your smile vanishes, replaced by the familiar weight of exhaustion. Right, you think to yourself. Back to the endless black hole of studying.

"Hey, you should come." Audrey's voice pulls you from your thoughts again. You turn to see her standing with the pink dress draped over one arm, a playful but earnest look on her face. "You haven’t left the dorm in ages. Come on, it’ll be fun."

"I don't know, Auds. I just... There's so much work to do, and—"

"Exactly! That’s why you need a break," she interrupts, crossing her arms in defiance. "You need a good distraction. And who knows? Maybe you’ll find a decent rebound to replace—"

"No."

Your voice is sharper than you intended, and the air between you shifts. Your brows knit together as a scowl tugs at your lips. "I don’t do rebounds. And I don’t need one. I’m over her."

Audrey raises a skeptical brow. "You say that, but you’ve been single for the entire year you two have been broken up."

"Yeah, and?" You shrug, the defensive edge softening slightly. "That doesn’t have to be a bad thing. I just… needed the time and space to, I don’t know, feel the breakup."

You sigh, leaning forward to rest your elbows on your knees. Your voice dips, quiet but unwavering. "We dated all through high school, Auds. We planned everything—college, careers, our whole life together. Then, one night, it was just… gone. I needed that break."

"I get it. No need for a rebound, then." Audrey’s lips curve into a warm smile as she gathers her wavy blonde hair, twisting it into a messy bun. She picks up the pink dress and heads toward the door, pausing to glance back at you. "I’m gonna go put my outfit on and do my makeup. But think about it, okay? I’d have more fun if you were there."

Her voice softens, the playful edge replaced by genuine concern. "I hate seeing you so groggy and drained over finals. You deserve a break."

With that, she disappears into the bathroom, leaving you alone with her words lingering in the air.

You prop your elbow on the desk, resting your chin in your palm as the decision weighs on you. What would you even wear? A quick mental inventory of your closet makes you groan. You’d gone a little too wild during the autumn sale at the mall, leaving your wardrobe overflowing with beige and brown sweaters—not exactly party material. Dresses? Practically nonexistent.

And besides, it's 8 PM on a Friday—you could really use a change of pace.

You let out a frustrated sigh, but it quickly turns into a chuckle. Audrey’s words must’ve gotten to you, because before you realize it, you’re pushing yourself out of your chair. The creak of the worn seat makes you certain it’s practically engraved a permanent imprint of your ass.

You stretch briefly, shaking out your legs, then make your way toward Audrey’s room. Maybe she’ll have something I like. You’re not exactly thrilled about diving into her wardrobe—her style is bold, flashy, and a little outside your comfort zone—but desperate times call for desperate measures.

When the bathroom door opens and shuts, you smile to yourself and stride over to lean casually against Audrey's doorframe. She looks up, raising her brows in surprise before a smirk tugs at her lips.

"Decided you’d go, huh?" she says, her tone teasing but approving. "You're so stubborn, sometimes."

"I’m not getting drunk, though," you say, crossing your arms as Audrey adjusts her earrings. "And I’m not changing my mind on that. Study routine starts back up tomorrow morning, and I don’t need a hangover slowing me down."

Audrey gives you an exaggerated eye roll but doesn’t argue, a playful grin spreading across her face.

You glance down at the long forest green dress you’re wearing, the silky fabric hugging your figure comfortably. A deep slit runs up one side, stopping at mid-thigh and adding just enough elegance to the look. You adjust the hem slightly, feeling a mix of nerves and excitement bubbling up. Maybe this night wouldn’t be such a bad idea after all.

"Drunk guy about to vomit, coming through!"

The announcement has your eyes widening as you quickly move out of the way to let the drunk guy and his friend, who’s half-carrying him, pass by—probably headed for the bathroom.

You cling to Audrey's side, linking your arms together as you laugh. "We just got here, and people are already throwing up?"

She chuckles, shaking her head. "Oh, babe, you haven't seen anything yet. Frat parties are the definition of pure insanity."

The deafening music blares even louder as you step into the main room, bodies pressed together as they sway and jump to the beat. Some throw their hands up in the air, fully immersed in the chaos of the party.

Your eyes scan the room, landing on the stereotypical beer pong table surrounded by a pack of guys locked in a heated game.

"Where's your boyfriend?" you tease, nudging Audrey. Her cheeks flush slightly—a subtle reminder of her true reason for coming tonight, aside from giving you a distraction.

"Not my boyfriend," she corrects, flipping her hair off her shoulder. "At least not yet. But that’s not why we’re here." She turns to you, a mischievous smile curling on her lips as she grabs your hands. "You're here to have fun, got it?" she shouts over the music.

With a grin, you extend your arms up above your head, body swaying to the beat of the music. Audrey laughs, mimicking your movements with exaggerated flair, her hands on her hips.

"Yes! Who knew you could move like that, girl?" she yells, wooing loudly before twirling you around. The two of you almost crash into a random guy.

"Careful. The last thing I need is this guy hitting on me then saying he can ‘turn me straight’ when I reject him," you quip, placing your hands on Audrey’s shoulders as you keep dancing.

Time flies as you chat and dance with a few girls from your friend group, whom you ran into coincidentally. An hour melts away unnoticed until a wave of murmurs ripples through the crowd, followed by sharp screams. Your attention shifts, and you spot Carter entering the room, his arm slung around a girl who looks like she was sculpted out of plastic, clinging to him like a lifeline.

You glance at Audrey, noticing the frown darkening her face. A wave of empathy crashes over you. "It’s okay. He’ll probably dump her by the end of the night, and then you’ll have him all to yourself," you say with a gentle smile.

Audrey scoffs, her scowl giving way to a pointedly condescending look. "Fuck him," she snaps. "I’m not wasting my time on some man-whore. I’ve got options."

A proud grin spreads across your face, but when your eyes flicker back to where Carter stood, your smile falters. He’s gone. In his place stands a silhouette that makes your stomach drop and your heart stop cold.

Panic surges through you as your breath quickens. Sasha, one of your friends, notices. "Hey, are you okay?" she asks, concern evident in her voice.

You stumble, grabbing Audrey’s arm. "I need to go. Now," you mumble, tugging her toward a quieter corner. She furrows her brows but stays silent, waiting for you to speak.

"I just... fuck, Auds, I just saw her," you finally manage, your voice trembling.

"And?" Audrey raises an eyebrow, unimpressed. "I thought you were 'over her.'" She emphasizes her point with air quotes.

"I thought I was too." Tears prick at your eyes like needles as you drop your gaze to the floor. "It's been a year, Audrey. Why am I not over her yet?"

Audrey’s expression softens at the crack in your voice. She pulls you into a tight hug, her hand rubbing soothing circles on your back. "I’m so sorry, honey. You don’t deserve this."

You cling to her, letting your head rest on her shoulder. After a moment, Audrey pulls away, her eyes filled with determination. "No wallowing," she declares firmly. "You’re here to have fun, whether she’s here or not. It’s your second year of college, hun. Live it up and don’t let the past ruin your night."

With a chuckle, you wipe away the tears threatening to spill, careful not to smudge your makeup, and nod firmly. "You’re right. I’m here to take a well-deserved break, and I’m not letting some ex get in the way."

Spinning on your heels, you barely manage to stop yourself as you come face-to-face with the very person haunting your thoughts. A gasp escapes your lips, and your hand flies up to cover your mouth.

She takes a deliberate step to the side, clearing your path. Her tone is tinged with arrogance as she says, "What? I got out of your way. Isn’t that what you wanted?" Her brows knit slightly, her mouth pressed into a thin, unreadable line.

"I didn't... I just—"

"Come on, Y/N. Let's go." Audrey loops her arm through yours, her grip firm as she pulls you away. Her glare cuts through your ex like a blade, sharp and unwavering.

Audrey had always liked her when the two of you were together, but after the breakup, all those sentiments had evaporated. Now, there was nothing but icy disdain in her gaze, a silent reminder of how things had gone south.

"That was so embarrassing, oh my God," you mutter, your wide eyes reflecting your inner turmoil as you and Audrey walk back into the main room. Heading straight for the kitchen, you rub your temples, trying to soothe the headache forming. Without a second thought, you grab the bottle of vodka from the counter and reach for a shot glass.

"Hey, no!" Audrey snatches the bottle from your grip, holding it just out of reach. "You promised you weren't gonna drink tonight. She's so not worth the hangover."

You let out a long sigh, leaning against the counter with a defeated shrug. "Yeah, I know." You pause, a frustrated exhale escaping your lips. "I just can't stop thinking about... God, the fucking breakup. Everything. We weren't supposed to just throw it all away over some stupid reason. I miss her, Auds."

Audrey shakes her head. "No, you don't. You miss the memories, not her. There's a difference." She places the bottle and shot glass back on the counter, then grabs your shoulders firmly, pulling you closer so you’re forced to meet her gaze. Her eyes are intense, unwavering. "Listen, you're only remembering the good parts. It's your mind playing tricks on you."

You sigh again, leaning heavily against the counter as the frustration in your voice rises. "We never had any bad times, though. Just the breakup." Your voice cracks slightly, betraying the emotions you'd been holding back. "It was good—she was good. It just... ended, and I don't even know why anymore."

Audrey's grip on your shoulders tightens gently, her expression unwavering. "Exactly, babe. That’s the part you're stuck on. You’re romanticizing it because you don’t have the full picture anymore. Breakups hurt, even the ones that make sense, but that doesn’t mean you should let the past keep pulling you back. You deserve better than this."

You let out a bitter laugh, shaking your head. "Do I? Because right now, it feels like I’m the one who messed it all up. Like maybe I wasn’t enough for her."

Audrey softens, pulling you into a hug before you can spiral any further. "Don’t do that. Don’t tear yourself apart over what happened. You’re enough—more than enough. And if she couldn’t see that, that’s on her, not you."

You bury your face in her shoulder, her steady reassurance grounding you for a moment. When you finally pull away, her determined gaze meets yours again. "You’re here to have fun, right? Not to relive the past. So let’s leave her back there where she belongs and get you back out there."

You nod hesitantly, letting her words sink in. "You’re right," you say softly, trying to muster a smile. "She’s not worth ruining my night over."

"Exactly," Audrey says with a grin, looping her arm through yours. "Now, come on. Let’s show this party what you’re made of."

You saunter back to the designated dance floor, forcing a grin as the music thumps through your chest, trying to shake off the earlier interaction. Sasha joins in beside you, her blonde, shoulder-length hair bouncing as she jumps and twirls to the beat. The faint brown of her roots begins to show, a faint reminder of the dye job she got two months ago.

Your friend Maeve stumbles into your line of sight, mimicking a ridiculous move, and you laugh despite yourself, grateful for the temporary distraction.

But then your gaze drifts, almost instinctively, to one corner of the room. There she is—your ex—leaning against the wall with that infuriatingly effortless coolness. And beside her, some brunette is clearly making a move, leaning in closer with every passing second.

You freeze, the air knocked out of you as if someone had punched your chest. A bitter scoff escapes your lips, shaking your head in disbelief. You swallow hard, the knot in your stomach twisting tighter, and mutter under your breath, "Of course."

It's as if something takes over you, a force compelling you to pull Sasha closer. You lean in and whisper urgently, "I need a favor. Please, just go with it. I'll explain later—don’t ask questions."

She blinks, her brows knitting together in confusion. "What are you—"

Before she can finish, your lips crash onto hers. She gasps in surprise but quickly responds, her hands finding your waist as the crowd erupts in cheers and whistles. You wrap your arms around her shoulders, leaning into the kiss as it deepens, your tongue brushing against hers. The world around you blurs, drowned out by the roaring excitement of onlookers.

Pulling away, you chuckle softly, your breath mingling with Sasha's as you glance around the room. The crowd is buzzing, their gazes locked on you—some bewildered, others clearly displeased.

But your attention quickly shifts, your eyes landing on Ellie.

Her gaze is piercing, burning through the room with an intensity that makes your stomach flip. The girl beside her tugs at her arm, desperate for attention, but Ellie barely spares her a glance. Instead, she scoffs, her jaw tightening as she shrugs off the girl’s grip.

Without a word, she turns on her heel, shoving past people as she storms toward the front door. The slam echoes through the house, leaving a charged silence in its wake.

You bite your lip, nerves flickering beneath your confident facade, and glance over at Audrey, who bursts into laughter, still processing what just happened. "You did not," she exclaims, shaking her head in disbelief.

"Thanks, Sasha. You're an absolute lifesaver." You flash her a grin, ignoring the bewildered look on her face as your gaze shifts toward the door Ellie just slammed shut. A swell of pride rises in your chest, a smirk tugging at the corner of your lips. For better or worse, you had gotten her attention.

After some time, you eventually say your goodbyes to your friends, including Audrey. You decide to leave early, your social battery completely drained. Audrey stays behind, her energy seemingly endless, as she's far more used to these party scenes.

Grabbing your black purse, you head for the door and step outside. Your brows lift in mild surprise when you spot Ellie sitting on the steps, her back to you. The only light comes from the moon and the soft glow of her phone screen. Silently, you move closer, glancing over her shoulder to see her engrossed in a silly dinosaur game.

A quiet chuckle escapes your lips as you tilt your head, watching her affectionately. She hasn’t changed a bit.

"I know you're standing behind me, Y/N. You're not slick."

Or maybe she has.

You sigh, moving to sit beside her on the step. The tension between you is thick and the weight of the moment feels suffocating, each second dragging like an eternity. “I wasn’t trying to... I didn’t mean what I said the way you thought I did.” The words tumble out, and you wring your hands nervously.

“I’ve just been so distracted with finals, and Audrey finally convinced me to leave our dorm to take a break. You being here... it just caught me off guard, and—” You groan, burying your face in your hands. “God, I should really stop talking.”

"Yeah, you should," she mutters, shaking her head as she pockets her phone and fixes her gaze on her shoes. Red Converse, the ones with doodles scrawled across the front. You recognize them instantly—they’re the pair you gave her for her birthday last year, covered in your handiwork. You can’t help but remember the laugh that erupted from her chest when your doodling spree ended with you drawing a Sharpie mustache on her face.

The memory tugs at you, bittersweet and unshakable. You pull your knees up to your chest, wrapping your arms around them and resting your chin on your forearm. "Still obsessed with dinosaurs?"

Her lips twitch, almost forming a smile. "Went to class in a dino costume once," she says, leaning back on her elbows with a casual ease.

Finally, her eyes meet yours, lingering as they trace over your face, your hair, and the way the dress clings to your body. She doesn't say it, but you can see it—the flicker of admiration she's trying to bury. "Pretty sure that says it all," she adds with a shrug, but the way her gaze softens betrays her indifference.

You tilt your head back, gazing up at the sprawling constellations scattered across the night sky, their brilliance stirring a quiet joy in your chest. Lowering your gaze, your eyes follow the gentle sway of the trees in the rising wind, their movement mirrored in the cool breeze brushing against your bare shoulders. A sudden chill ripples through you, sending a shiver down your spine—until something warm and familiar settles over you, enveloping you in its comforting embrace.

Glancing down, you realize it’s a jacket, worn and soft, smelling faintly of Ellie’s cologne. You look up, meeting her gaze with a hint of confusion.

“What?” she mutters, a faint scoff escaping her lips as she leans back again, feigning nonchalance. “Can’t let you get hypothermia.”

But there’s something in her tone—subtle, unspoken, and tender—that makes your chest tighten.

You slip it on, the warmth instantly comforting, before glancing back at her. “You’ll get cold, though.”

Ellie tilts her head, a pointed look settling on her face. “Right, because you forgot about my absolute freezer of a dorm. Felt like I was living in fucking Antarctica. Might as well have been an igloo.”

For the first time tonight, she chuckles—a soft, genuine sound that tugs at something deep inside you. Her smile is the same as it’s always been, the one you hadn’t realized just how much you’d missed. It almost makes you smile too, but the weight of everything unsaid lingers between you, dimming your brief moment of joy.

Your grin falters, a sigh slipping out as you lower your gaze. “What went wrong between us?”

The question hangs in the air, raw and vulnerable, carrying the weight of everything you’ve been too afraid to ask until now.

Her shoulders slump as her heartbeat quickens, the weight of the moment settling heavily between you. This wasn’t the kind of conversation she expected to have tonight—especially not with you. “You really wanna go there?” she asks, her voice low and hesitant as she leans forward, resting her elbows on her knees, legs spread slightly in a relaxed stance that betrays her inner turmoil.

You nod, your gaze steady and unwavering. “I need to know, Ellie. It’s been eating at me for a year.”

She exhales sharply, her eyes dropping to the concrete beneath her feet, as if it holds the answers she’s been avoiding. “I was in a bad place,” she admits, her voice barely above a whisper. “I couldn’t handle a relationship anymore. I didn’t want to leave, but staying would’ve hurt you even more.”

Her words hang in the air like a weight, the raw honesty cracking through the wall of confusion you’ve carried since the breakup.

Your breath catches as her words sink in. You’ve spent so much time replaying the breakup in your mind, blaming yourself, thinking maybe you had done something wrong, and now hearing this explanation leaves you unsure of how to feel. Relief? Frustration? Sadness?

"You didn't think I deserved to know that back then?" you ask, your voice trembling slightly as you try to keep your composure.

Ellie finally looks at you, guilt flickering in her eyes. "I didn’t know how to say it. I thought... I thought it’d be easier if you hated me. That way, you'd move on."

You shake your head, a dry laugh escaping. "Easier for who? Because it sure as hell wasn’t easy for me."

She runs a hand through her auburn hair, tugging at the strands like she’s punishing herself. "I know. I messed up. I thought I was doing the right thing. I didn't know I hurt you this bad."

The air feels heavy between you, and for a moment, neither of you speaks. You pull the jacket tighter around yourself, searching her face for sincerity. All you find is regret.

You sit in silence, though it feels like an eternity. The quiet is only broken by the rhythmic tapping of Ellie’s shoe against the concrete, her leg bouncing nervously.

"Do you regret it?"

"Regret what?"

"Breaking up with me?"

Your voice is steady, but your chest tightens as you glance up at her, bracing yourself for an answer you’re not ready to hear. Bittersweet nostalgia churns within you as you watch her intently, trying to decipher her expression.

Ellie averts her gaze, focusing on the trees swaying in the breeze and the students passing by—some clutching textbooks, others laughing as they shove their friends playfully. "You kissed that girl," she mutters, her tone laced with accusation. "Looked pretty cozy to me."

"You still didn’t answer my question."

Ellie’s jaw tightens as she finally turns to face you, her eyes sharp and conflicted. "What the fuck am I supposed to say?" she snaps, her voice rising. "It’s been a year, Y/N. What’s my explanation gonna change?"

You rise abruptly and descend the steps, shooting her a sharp glare as your jaw clenches tight. The rain pelts against your skin, but you barely notice, too consumed by the storm raging inside you. "At least I’d finally get the fucking closure I need to move on," you bite out, your voice cracking under the weight of your frustration. "I haven’t been able to date anyone else because of you. Every time I try, it feels like I’m betraying something that’s not even there anymore—"

"I don’t want you with anyone else," she interrupts, her voice cutting through the night with a raw, unyielding edge. Her arms cross defensively over her chest as she steps toward you, her posture tense.

You scoff, throwing your hands up. "So, what? I’m just supposed to stay single forever? Never move on, just because you don’t want me with anyone else?"

"That’s not what I meant!" she retorts, her voice cracking slightly.

"Then what the fuck do you—"

Before you can finish, Ellie closes the distance between you, her lips crashing onto yours in an ardent, desperate kiss. It’s urgent, almost reckless, yet it feels natural—your mouths moving together in sync, reigniting a passion you hadn’t felt in over a year.

You gasp softly but instinctively kiss her back, your arms sliding around her shoulders as hers settle on your waist, tugging you impossibly closer, as if letting go would mean losing you forever. A muffled moan escapes into her mouth when your fingers tangle in her hair, tugging lightly.

Her hands drift lower, skimming over your back before settling firmly on your hips, grounding you both in the heat of the moment.

After a moment, she pulls back, both of you breathless, your foreheads lightly touching as your frantic eyes lock. A small chuckle slips out as you lower your gaze, your hands sliding down her shoulders and chest to wrap securely around her torso, pulling her into a warm hug.

"Shit, I’ve missed you," you murmur into her chest, your voice laced with quiet relief as her familiar scent fills your senses. You sigh contentedly when her arms tighten around you, enveloping you in the embrace you’d longed for.

"I’ve missed you too, pretty girl," she whispers, her voice soft but steady, carrying the weight of unspoken emotions.

When you first arrived at the party, all you wanted was a chance to unwind. Now, looking back, a simple break was far from what you ended up with—but what you got was so much more.

Ellie Williams is back in your life.