Finrod And Beor At A Girls Night

Me, donning my shield of faith, breastplate of righteousness, and sword of the Spirit: ah lads, here we go again

My sister: why are you so Bedecked™️ we're literally going to school

Me, putting on my helmet of salvation: BECAUSE

Sister: it keeps going

Me, almost falling over, tugging on the boots of peace: IM GONNA NEED THESE IF I HAVE TO DEAL WITH HOOLIGANS

Me fr ❤️❤️ I love both.

I have great respect for Tolkien fandom members who are Silmarillion fans and well-versed in Middle-earth lore, but are ALSO Rings of Power fans (or at least tolerant if not supportive of those who are).

Your love for Tolkien is deep, your heart is welcoming and generous, and your imagination is wide open.

I admire you, and I cannot believe there are people who would imply you are "not real fans".

I may tag specific Moots who fall under this category. Please give a shout out too if you know any. ❤️

Any setting where the elves have weaker booze than the dwarves isn't committing to the bit

This came to me after school, yall.

Elrond: so you're just to accept three rings of power---that are shiny---made by Fëanor's grandson, when the three shiny things Fëanor made led to the deaths of thousands of people?????

Gil-Galad, Círdan, and Galadriel, who were all directly affected by Fëanor's Crazy: I mean, come onnnnn. What could POSSIBLY happen??

Elrond: *flashbacks to his dads arguing about some shiny rocks over dinner* ORPHANS AND SUICIDES COULD HAPPEN, THAT'S WHAT

Cause yall. Bro has firsthand experience of what shiny metals/rocks/jewelry does to the brain. His mom, his adopted dads, like the whole shebang. And all these people that Elrond looks up to, and likely sees as close family/friends, are just being stupid!!!! ALL OF THEM lived through the First Age, so there's no reason for this tomfoolery!!

Yes, I know that they were deceived by Annatar, and I know that no one is infallible, but guys!!!! Three objects of power!!! You gotta wonder were we saw that last! 🤔

NOOOOOOOO NOT THE FAMILY HEIRLOOMS!!!!!!!

SHUT THE FUCK UP EVERYONE HE THREW THE FUCKING HAMMER?

I am Earendil (one of the only people in my family that doesn't like football) with my silmaril (a stretchy headlight that my dad gave me) and I am tending the dark, solitary affairs of the Void (grilling chicken wings after dark while everybody else is watching the game) on my mighty ship, Vingilot (my brother's weightlifting bench that makes a very nice seat).

ao3 turns 15 today

reblog if youre older than ao3

(there's a lot of people asking about this, but the legal age to use social media is 13, except in few countries. so yes, there are people here under 15)

A cursed thought just occured to me and I decided to make you all suffer to

So in Tolkien lore elves are immortal right? After a certain point they don't age and will just keep living, save for the intervention of accidents, illness/poison, or very pointy objects. This leads to a whole laundry list of questions on biology but there's one in particular I want to bite into today(pun much intended).

Teeth.

How do elf teeth work? Because the main issue with teeth over time is that they wear down with use. This is not as much of a problem in modern times, we are spoiled with a lot of very soft easy to chew food, but it's still a thing and historicaly you wore down your teeth alot over the course of your life. Things like smoking a pipe can carve a grove in your teeth where you hold the pipe stem.

And this means that if you're immortan and alive long enough, your teeth will wear down to nothing because elves do need to eat. But obviously Galadriel and Elrond aren't looking like grandmas who forgot their dentures, so elves must have something to solve this.

I therefor present my 3 running theories for how elves keep their teeth:

- The OP Teeth Of Steel Theory

Elf teeth are simply to strong to wear down. A bit boring if you ask me.

- The Elves Are Rodents Theory

Rodent front teeth grow continiously their entire life, it's realy cool. It's also why they're always chewing on things, because if they don't their teeth will grow so long it stops them from eating. This theory proposes elf teeth also just grow forever(this could lead to a extremely annoying habit of elves to grind their teeth to keep them down, but oh well).

- The Elves Are Sharks Theory

Sharks tackle the problem of teeth by simply?

Growing more teeth?

Like they just keep loosing teeth and growing new ones. For elves this could mean that when a tooth gets to worn it simply falls out and a new one grown in, like human milk teeth but their entire life.

This was all writen in about 10min while getting ready for bed, so please enjoy these lovely cursed thoughts while I escape to dreamland :)

@tathrin

Ace aro queen 👌 good rep in the media

“I am bride to no man.”

“Then tell me, to whom are you pledged?”

“Death.”